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56 Awful Analogies

Hits: 16342 | Rating: (2.8) | Category: Funny | Added by: cobrakiller
Page: 1 2 Next >   Jump to: Bottom    Last Post
jinxiejae
Female, 30-39, Western US
 2753 Posts
Thursday, May 05, 2011 11:33:45 PM
there was one that i heard a long time ago that i really liked. "trouble followed her like the vapors of a cheap perfume."

clockwork208
Male, 30-39, Western US
 838 Posts
Thursday, May 05, 2011 6:28:43 PM
Jesus, does nobody remember these at all?

Vimto
Male, 40-49, Europe
 2570 Posts
Thursday, May 05, 2011 9:25:59 AM
“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.”

DNA - Hitch-Hikers Guide.

Vimto
Male, 40-49, Europe
 2570 Posts
Thursday, May 05, 2011 6:46:40 AM
A few of these are some nice variations on some of Douglas Adams' work.

HOBYandy
Male, 18-29, Eastern US
 3065 Posts
Thursday, May 05, 2011 12:50:43 AM
Batmanners:
Not quite. A simile simply compares two objects. A metaphor claims that the objects are the same. Your description wouldn't be correct for a statement such as "He was faster than a speeding bullet," which is a simile, even though it does not use LIKE or AS.

TheWaffle
Male, 18-29, Southern US
 117 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 11:31:10 PM
I'm pretty sure #28 is from the Simpsons or something, talking about a hobo in a fight whose prize is food or something. Maybe the episode where Homer gets the x-ray that shows that his skull is like a natural helmet so he goes into the world of amateur boxing.

I can't believe I remember that...

YugureKage
Female, 18-29, Midwest US
 1211 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 11:25:45 PM
And I am an English major, so there :P Some of these were pretty funny

YugureKage
Female, 18-29, Midwest US
 1211 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 11:25:20 PM
17 Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

I liked this one. :D

Batmanners
Male, 18-29, Canada
 4012 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 10:21:37 PM
To add to my Simile example:
"The dog was as young as a baby"

Batmanners
Male, 18-29, Canada
 4012 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 10:20:20 PM
Analogy seems correct to me.

Dog:Puppy/Old Man:Baby

"The dog was still a puppy, much like the old man on the street corner who goes through the trash, he was once a baby."

Putting things into perspective:

A simile would be a comparison "The dog was like a canine baby".

A metaphor is an analogy that does not use the words LIKE or AS to make the statement.
"When the dog was very young he was a puppy."

Hope this helped. I love figures of speech.

draino123
Male, 30-39, Southern US
 581 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 9:53:19 PM
reminds me of naked gun "... and like a midget at a urinal, i was going to have to stay on my toes." frank drebin ftw!!!

VictoryRider
Male, 40-49, Eastern US
 9370 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 9:19:04 PM
Some of those were pretty funny. I think 16 made me laugh the most though.

mvangild
Male, 30-39, Midwest US
 528 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 9:02:30 PM
I could almost hear Leslie Nielsen reading some of those. Especially the one for the nameless dread. :)

smigbaafm
Male, 18-29, Eastern US
 653 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 8:02:47 PM
these... are similes...

it's been a while, but aren't similes something different from analogies? or are similes a subset of analogies?

danky
Male, 18-29, Western US
 559 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 6:45:44 PM
lots of lol

premierwondr
Male, 18-29, Eastern US
 979 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 6:31:41 PM
That had me dying!

TheShgn2
Male, 13-17, Southern US
 631 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 6:12:19 PM
"He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River."
Love it. :D

5Cats
Male, 50-59, Canada
 25266 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 4:16:41 PM
Wow, some of those were terrific actually! Like 48 & 49, eh? Geschpooklichkeit indeed!

Angelmassb
Male, 18-29, S. America
 15498 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 4:07:27 PM
McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

danthew
Male, 18-29, Europe
 2137 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 3:21:13 PM
Some of these are intentionally very witty, like I'm sure #16 would make sense and probably be quite clever if it was in context.

propagandi
Male, 40-49, Southern US
 725 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 2:59:56 PM
I hate MEEBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AniBlue
Female, 18-29, Midwest US
 227 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 2:34:40 PM
Some of these were pretty damn epic xD

SexBobOmb
Female, 18-29, Western US
 62 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 2:22:13 PM
"It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall."

I Hate When This Happens. >_>

melvinotis
Male, 40-49, Eastern US
 29 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 2:06:58 PM
Liked this one a lot

duffytoler
Male, 40-49, Midwest US
 5220 Posts
Wednesday, May 04, 2011 1:40:29 PM
Some of those were clever, like:

18. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.

Only problem with a lot of these is that the teacher doesn't "get it".

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