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Stone Age Carving May Be Ancient Sex Toy

Hits: 28074 | Rating: (2.8) | Category: Funny | Added by: goaliejerry
Page: 1 2 3 Next >   Jump to: Bottom    Last Post
CodeJockey
Male, 40-49, Southern US
 4830 Posts
Sunday, August 01, 2010 1:23:01 PM
HOLY-SHI#!
I think it's an anti-rape device!

Ang, Pompei being a brothel theme town is not just my opinion alone, an hour long program was just on the History Channel with several archeologists saying the same thing but, here's a link, check out the 17th slide (marked "16.")

Was it common for urban areas of the day to have so many in such high concentration?

Angilion
Male, 40-49, Europe
 11029 Posts
Saturday, July 31, 2010 4:04:05 PM
@Angilion ...wtf are you talking about? You get all of that outta a simple article about a dildo from the stone age? Get a life and save your bullpoo theology for a website where it's actually appropriate, not on IAB.


I "get all that outta" knowledge I have. I realise you are offended by anyone knowing anything, but that's your problem, not mine. I'm not going to dumb down to your level.

BunnyNaku
Female, 18-29, Midwest US
 5245 Posts
Friday, July 30, 2010 9:00:58 AM
teehee.. its a boner

LuvsIt
Female, 18-29, Eastern US
 19 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 8:01:21 PM
@Angilion ...wtf are you talking about? You get all of that outta a simple article about a dildo from the stone age? Get a life and save your bullpoo theology for a website where it's actually appropriate, not on IAB.

RepostPolice
Male, 13-17, Midwest US
 190 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 7:58:38 PM
Leave it to IAB to argue about a seven thousand year old dildo.

Angilion
Male, 40-49, Europe
 11029 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 5:47:42 PM
I'd love to see you provide evidence to support your statements about Pompeii, CodeJockey.


It's true that Pompeii was noted as a hedonistic place. It was criticised by Roman moralists who lamented the decadence of the republic/empire in their days and advocated a return to the morality of earlier times in Rome. Which, of course, made Pompeii all the more popular.

Are you counting every building with sexually explicit pictures as a brothel, even if it's clearly a private home? Frankly, I doubt if your statement would be true even then.

Angilion
Male, 40-49, Europe
 11029 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 5:35:53 PM
Does anyone else get as annoyed as I do when everyone is posting jokes and quips and a know-it-all has to show us all how smart they are? We get it, you have the internet. We don't want ancient history class, we want to read funny comments and be entertained.


You won't understand this, but you might be able to find someone to explain it to you:

Some people know some things without having to look them up. No, really. It's related to them reading more than just funny comments.

Have such a nice day!

Angilion
Male, 40-49, Europe
 11029 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 5:33:29 PM
Cut off as usual...I quoted that part of the article to show that it was *not* in the water, so it won't have been worn away by the constant flow of water.

Angilion
Male, 40-49, Europe
 11029 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 5:32:07 PM
@angillion - The gods you're thinking of are Greek and Roman. Any religious influence from Sweden would be Norse.


28,000 years ago was Norse...are you sure about that?

As I already said, I was showing *examples* of male fertility gods. Many people are unaware that there ever was such a thing, think fertility gods are female.

So, I'll say again as I said before:

This could have been intended to be part of a statue like that, of an earlier fertility god.


Also, the Stone Age didn't have very advanced religious ideas.


How can you be sure of that? Also, does a fertility god necessarily require advanced religious ideas?

(they did say it was in a river for a long time, which means it would have been worn away by the constant flow of water)


it's been lying in the bottom sediments and clay layers of the river, and it's been well preserved there.

Magicant
Female, 18-29, Canada
 275 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 9:09:20 AM
What's worse is all the comments at the bottom of the article trying to be funny

CodeJockey
Male, 40-49, Southern US
 4830 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 8:50:05 AM
@jayme

Nearly the entire city of Pompei was brothels. Archeologists have not put 2 and 2 together yet but, the Romans and Greeks were into theme towns and themed societies. In those themed area are repeating images of a deity related to the theme.

Pompei is covered is images of a red-skinned, horned goat-man with a enormous wang banging a lamb-girl.
It was a place you came to worship sex/power. They even had a yearly festival that's kinda like Mardi Gras and October Fest combined.
"...so come on over to Pompei for the 'all-you-screw' April-Fest!!!"

IamBored29
Male, 18-29, Eastern US
 647 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 8:10:52 AM
Masterbating...the worlds oldest time killer.

Painter13
Male, 40-49, Midwest US
 1378 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 5:07:46 AM
The're sure it's an ancient sex toy because Madonnas' DNA was found on it. Jeez people read the article.

jayme21
Male, 18-29, Europe
 389 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 4:21:55 AM
There are loads of "fertility symbols" this experts and archaeologists can never just say its a sex toy.

Like in Pompie there was a brothel which had pictures of different services the women provided. But all the experts had no idea what it was until a janitor one day said i know what that is thats a price list. They just dont want to accept humans were more carnal or they themselves know of such things...

pompie sex list

CodeJockey
Male, 40-49, Southern US
 4830 Posts
Thursday, July 29, 2010 12:42:58 AM
given the period, the probability of it being a tool for a religious ceremony is much higher than 0.
"I now pronounce you 'Open for Business...'"


"...though you'd have to be careful not to lose it hahaha..."
Why do you assume that it's for someone that is an adult by modern age standards?
"Deasia, you're middle-aged now. You have a responsibility to help produce farm hands and 11 is a long time to wait before..."

goaliejerry
Male, 30-39, Eastern US
 4028 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 10:55:45 PM
"Why would it be carved to have the head on it?"

To catch on the sphincter, DUH!

And people noting that the ancients didn't circumcise - yes, but you could still pull the hood back, exposing the head, and it would look like an uncircumcised one. Its not that remarkable to think a penis could be portrayed by ancient people with the head exposed. It was like magic! The center of power and pleasure, just like today.

Frankly, back then, I bet 20% of their time was spent playing with their penises, showing the helmet to the ladies - before you raped them - not much to do for recreation. Those were simpler times, albeit brutal, cruel, harsh, and short lived.

Oh, and I'm sure they played with their buttholes too.

NotTHATbored
Female, 18-29, Eastern US
 1103 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 9:53:33 PM
Oh yeah and there was no IAB, so really what is left to do but masterbate?

NotTHATbored
Female, 18-29, Eastern US
 1103 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 9:52:51 PM
Well considering that they had no tv, facebook, cars, and many died young ...I think it's logical they turned to dildos!

IsmelBacn420
Female, 18-29, Eastern US
 99 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 8:49:38 PM
drunk step dad,that was funny. but i just wanna say that ppl musta been smaller cause that poos dinky. wouldn't be very useful. 2 cm? really? four inches might not be horrible, though you'd have to be careful not to lose it hahaha... but 2 cm?

Stelly
Male, 30-39, Eastern US
 321 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 8:27:27 PM
I saw a show on one of the learning type channels on the history of sex. Some freaky ass poo went on back then!!! Especially the Egyptians! There is a hieroglyph of a chick squatting on a pyramid shaped dildo...

DrunkStepdad
Male, 40-49, Western US
 207 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 6:43:05 PM
Looks like it could have been someones tool.

Gerry1of1
Male, 50-59, Western US
 33895 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 6:35:54 PM
There are a lot of things it could be. For example ... um ... A paper weight, no- no paper. Um ... ... it could be a ... no...

Okay, it's a dildo.

bloodwrage
Male, 18-29, Eastern US
 152 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 6:25:17 PM
"Your mind and my mind wanders away to make this interpretation about what it looks like — for you and me, it signals this erected-penis-like shape"

Just say it looks like a dick, man.

lunaticlover
Female, 18-29, Europe
 355 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 5:50:13 PM
@angillion - The gods you're thinking of are Greek and Roman. Any religious influence from Sweden would be Norse. Also, the Stone Age didn't have very advanced religious ideas. If they said the object dated back from maybe 1000 BC I would have agreed with you, but the Stone Age is a long way off from that.

It could be anything, really. In fact, the shape could be a result of weathering (they did say it was in a river for a long time, which means it would have been worn away by the constant flow of water) and could have been just an average tool in it's prime.

Although, didn't scientists, discover an ancient statue-type thing that they thought was a sex-toy? It was like a woman's body with over-sized breasts. I think that was featured on IAB too actually.

last_ninja
Male, 18-29, Western US
 613 Posts
Wednesday, July 28, 2010 5:47:34 PM
sex toys are nothing new. they've had these for a REALLY long time. here is more info

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