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True Stories - In One Sentence

Hits: 17261 | Rating: (3.0) | Category: Funny | Added by: lostinkorea
Page: 1 2 3 Next >   Jump to: Bottom    Last Post
GRadde
Male, 18-29, Europe
 2567 Posts
Tuesday, June 23, 2009 1:04:30 PM
That was really something. Many of them are deep, funny, provocative, subtle and sublime all in one.

dukorider1
Male, 18-29, Europe
 211 Posts
Thursday, June 18, 2009 2:16:45 PM
favorites:
1)"I felt pretty bad when my husband staggered into the kitchen from the den with a profusely bleeding cut in his forehead, collapsed on the floor and told me "I knew you wouldn't want me to bleed on the carpet."

2)I realized today that squeezing my own boob feels a lot like squeezing my boyfriends butt.

3)As I finished making my father's bed, the hospital called and informed me he wouldn't be needing it.

4)The most prominent memory I have of my grandmother is the night she tried to kill me.

5)As the cashier gave a knowing look to my wife as she scanned the prenatal vitamins, I realized this random girl is the first person on earth to know we are having a baby.


Link_Hiei
Male, 18-29, Eastern US
 5188 Posts
Monday, June 01, 2009 4:04:30 AM
My crazy Polish dad came inside after digging a hole for a new tree in the backyard, holding the skull of "Speedy," my cat who had died months before and said, "Look, it's Speedy! Meow!"

My favorite.


dragonshadoz
Female, 18-29, Canada
 16276 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 11:51:55 PM
I loved this:

When the surgeon asked me if the woman in the waiting room was my wife, I wanted to say "Someday, I hope."


Woot45
Female, 13-17, Western US
 2284 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 1:17:09 PM
This one made me laugh my ass off.

My crazy Polish dad came inside after digging a hole for a new tree in the backyard, holding the skull of "Speedy," my cat who had died months before and said, "Look, it's Speedy! Meow!"


idiotfilter
Male, 18-29, Midwest US
 3934 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 9:49:22 AM
i thought a lot of these were really deep and good....i really liked this....definitely bookmarking it...

yo-i-am-luke
Male, 18-29, Europe
 685 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 9:21:03 AM
I say alot of them was classic emo lies. You get them all the time on stuff like this... anyhoo my own one liner:

"She thought I was someone else as we danced drunk together in a club kissing, but now we been dating two years."


malikymoo
Female, 18-29, Europe
 2039 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 8:06:10 AM
god some people are so depressing

amped35
Male, 13-17, Eastern US
 254 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 7:48:26 AM
The fire we started in that corn field was terrible for more reasons than just its failure to produce popcorn.


mise
Female, 18-29, Europe
 3303 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 7:12:02 AM
I like this one, although it is really sad:

The last thing I saw before the shrapnel hit us was my buddy, Ryan, smiling at me while saying, "Relax or you'll die all tense."


BoomBox
Male, 13-17, Western US
 1230 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 6:58:29 AM
Yeah I agree with Shadow, that's what I thought. Just a kinda depressing, not so funny FML. They're a bit vague though. Maybe it should be two sentences?

Robert_D
Male, 18-29, Canada
 594 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 5:24:54 AM
The best:

My crazy Polish dad came inside after digging a hole for a new tree in the backyard, holding the skull of "Speedy," my cat who had died months before and said, "Look, it's Speedy! Meow!"


DaisyDope
Female, 13-17, Europe
 301 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 4:42:55 AM
some of them were miserable, but alot were clever (:
"For his birthday I gave him a Jenga set where every time you pulled out a block, it had a memory, inside joke, or quote on it."
i know what im getting my boyfriend now ^^

USFEmoGirl
Female, 18-29, Southern US
 1455 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 4:24:07 AM
Shadow, agreed.

Some of these are quite funny though. Not funny in the - wow, your life sucks ass. Funny in the way where the writer was laughing and has transcended that laughter upon us through a single sentence.


Binary101
Male, 13-17, Asia
 850 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 4:24:03 AM
This is a bad FML ripoff. FML is original

ShadowRyder
Male, 18-29, Midwest US
 2146 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 2:34:44 AM
These are like FML's but with one sentence and more depressing =S

i-am-bo-red
Male, 13-17, Western US
 152 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 2:18:26 AM
HAHA! i feel like a pervert.... :\

murrymalty
Male, 18-29, Europe
 2904 Posts
Sunday, May 31, 2009 2:07:47 AM
they all suck
haahaahaahaa

Ace_Cosmo
Female, 13-17, Midwest US
 166 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 10:54:01 PM
That was somewhat depressing.

iluvpink13
Female, 18-29, Canada
 1418 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 10:39:37 PM
entertaining, to say the least

Sociophobic
Male, 18-29, Southern US
 373 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 10:16:56 PM
Sadly, I have the same stories as some of these people.

d_katman
Male, 13-17, Western US
 1845 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 10:16:44 PM
:O this was awesome

thebandit
Male, 18-29, Midwest US
 364 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 9:55:08 PM
While it was comforting to hear the cop's reassurances that he personally did not believe we were pedophiles, it really didn't do much to help the situation.

Nburkie420
Male, 18-29, Canada
 745 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 9:24:52 PM
"I love you more than anyone else in the world..."
This morning I was dangerously close to buying a 24-pack of condoms with my Mothers' Day card before realizing the embarrassing implications.

thats just great


ScottSerious
Male, 18-29, Western US
 5329 Posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009 9:17:30 PM
wtf is this

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