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Category: Science
Date: 07/20/13 06:30 PM

39 Responses to Are You Smart Enough To Get These Nerdy Jokes?

  1. Profile photo of ElectricEye
    ElectricEye Male 40-49
    2723 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 6:33 pm
    Link: Are You Smart Enough To Get These Nerdy Jokes? - Intellectual jokes for the nerd inside us all.
  2. Profile photo of OhNoFrodo
    OhNoFrodo Male 30-39
    333 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 6:51 pm
    Just a couple of them I didn`t get so would appreciate some help;

    1. The man frozen to absolute zero is OK now

    2. The cat with the lowest Mew (measurement of some sort?)

    Thanks

  3. Profile photo of Gerry1of1
    Gerry1of1 Male 50-59
    36196 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. I don`t think one glass would kill you...would it?

  4. Profile photo of Grendel
    Grendel Male 40-49
    5877 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 7:06 pm
    @OhNoFrodo


    `OK` is actual `0K` or Zero Kelvin. So he his now at Zero Kelvin

    Mew = Mu, wich is the greek letter that stands for the coefficient of friction. So, a lower Mu equals lower friction.
  5. Profile photo of McThstlpnts
    McThstlpnts Female 18-29
    1540 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 7:06 pm
    The only one I don`t get is the first programmer joke. Other than that I`m Au :-D
  6. Profile photo of Grendel
    Grendel Male 40-49
    5877 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 7:11 pm
    @Gerry1of1

    Depends on the strength. Household, not so much, but industrial H2O2is usually around 35%. The LD50 (lethal dose where 50% of people die)for a normal-sized human is ~16 oz. So it would hurt you reall bad.
  7. Profile photo of Grendel
    Grendel Male 40-49
    5877 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 7:13 pm
    @McThstlpnts

    He stated there were two (2) difficult things...the proceeds to list TO TWO, but as programmers start with ZERO, ended up with THREE.

    (I think that`s it. I`m more of a chemical nerd than a programming one)
  8. Profile photo of OhNoFrodo
    OhNoFrodo Male 30-39
    333 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 7:29 pm
    @MeGrendel

    Aah thanks buddy, I should have got the 0 Kelvin as Absolute Zero but because the video said "oh kay" I missed it and never heard of Mu so thanks for the explanation.
  9. Profile photo of CodeJockey
    CodeJockey Male 40-49
    5606 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:10 pm
    "The only one I don`t get is the first programmer joke."
    Which one: (Girl | Boy) == Boy == (0|1) == 1
    or
    "array hard_things" only has 2 valid positions, index 0 and index 1; Index 2 will cause a protection fault. If you think that`s wrong, you probably code in VB only and need to have your hand smashed in a drawer...
  10. Profile photo of turdburglar
    turdburglar Male 30-39
    4711 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:23 pm

    God dammit...I`m fuc#in smart!
  11. Profile photo of paperduck
    paperduck Male 18-29
    1745 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:24 pm
    Mcthistle he said there were only 2 errors, and the array is initialized with 2 elements, element 0 and 1 (by array convention). Calling element 2 and listing a 3rd error it causes an "off by one errors".
  12. Profile photo of paperduck
    paperduck Male 18-29
    1745 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:28 pm
    What`s the cats on the roof one? The one with the lowest mu (coefficient of friction) slides off first, I get that, but what was the pun?
  13. Profile photo of Grendel
    Grendel Male 40-49
    5877 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:32 pm
    @paperduck

    Mu = Mew...kitten goes `mew`.
  14. Profile photo of Magentab0b
    Magentab0b Female 30-39
    1467 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:38 pm
    No where did it say they were funny/good puns, just that they were nerdy.
  15. Profile photo of Draculya
    Draculya Male 40-49
    14544 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 8:42 pm
    I get them, but they`re just not funny, nor are they proof of intelligence. A British accent* is the only true proof of intelligence.

    *Not Geordie
  16. Profile photo of davymid
    davymid Male 30-39
    12151 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 9:09 pm
    Sadly, yes.
  17. Profile photo of Grendel
    Grendel Male 40-49
    5877 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 9:18 pm
    @paperduck

    Mu = Mew...kitten goes `mew`.
  18. Profile photo of bacon_pie
    bacon_pie Male 30-39
    3061 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 9:31 pm
    Didn`t get all of them. The one`s I got were groaners. I did like the helium joke.
  19. Profile photo of OldOllie
    OldOllie Male 60-69
    15844 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 9:49 pm
    God help me, I got them all.
  20. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31771 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 9:52 pm
    I didn`t get "array hard things" or the "Mu = Mew"
    I did get the "Roman" one! It was a Wayne And Shuster comedy skit! One of the funniest ones they ever did. Nearly killed my parents! They laughed so hard!!
  21. Profile photo of OldOllie
    OldOllie Male 60-69
    15844 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 9:52 pm
    Gerry, common H2O2 is 3%. Pure H2O2 can be used as an oxidizer for rocket fuel. If you drank it, you would instantly turn into a mountain of pink foam.
  22. Profile photo of paperduck
    paperduck Male 18-29
    1745 posts
    July 20, 2013 at 11:41 pm
    McGrendal isn`t it meow? And what`s a lower mew/meow have to do with cats sliding? The double entendre wasn`t strong with that one
  23. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31771 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 4:13 am
    @paperduck: Cats all over the world make different sounds.
    NOT really! But we humans have different words for the same sounds, eh?
    When a Japanese person says "nyaa" it sounds a LOT like an English person saying "meow"...

    Having a "lower MU" would mean you are more slippery and would slide off the roof faster...

    Other words for "meow":
    Miau
    Niau
    Niaou
    Miaou
    Mja
    Moe-Moe
    Mao
  24. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31771 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 4:15 am


    Genius!
  25. Profile photo of Saunder
    Saunder Male 30-39
    181 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 4:23 am
    @5cats
    One to add to your list: miyav!
  26. Profile photo of Grendel
    Grendel Male 40-49
    5877 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 6:57 am
    paperduck@

    Generally speaking, Cat`s go `Meow`. A Kitten`s `Meow` sounds more like `Mew`.

    The joke mentioned kittens, not cats.
  27. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10722 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 8:12 am
    Logicians wife and the baby:
    The answer they were looking for could`ve been found with enums and a switch statement.

    Two hard things:
    Arrays beginning the `zeroth` element is a common feature with programming languages.

    Band with no Gigs:
    1024M = 1G

    Dozen eggs:
    Didn`t specify if she wanted eggs or bread.
  28. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10722 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 8:14 am
    Another programming language joke:

    How did the software engineer die in the shower? He followed the directions on the shampoo bottle:
    1)Rinse
    2)Lather
    3)Repeat
  29. Profile photo of jendrian
    jendrian Male 18-29
    2516 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 8:29 am
    man... these were bad jokes
  30. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10722 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 8:30 am
    What`s the difference between Java and JavaScript? You can always count on the former to take out the trash.
  31. Profile photo of angrynerd
    angrynerd Male 30-39
    36 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 10:49 am
    Can`t tell if you guys are joking or not. Mu is the coefficient of friction. Still didn`t get the roman one though
  32. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31771 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 4:02 pm
    @angrynerd: It`s a "Latin Thing". I don`t know Latin, but my parents did.
    Martini should be a plural, it would be Martinum OR Martinus if it were properly singular.

    However, since it`s a name, those rules don`t really apply, hence the "joke".
  33. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31771 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 4:11 pm
    Here @nerdrage: Same Joke but slightly different.
    Same Again But different.

    A Collection Of Bad Bar Jokes At least they`re G-Rated :-)

    A Latin scholar walks into a bar and says, "I`ll have a martinus."
    The bartender asks him. "Don`t you mean martini?"
    The man tells the bartender, "Listen, if I wanted two or more drinks I would have asked for them."

    I guess "Martinus" is the singular form.
  34. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31771 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 4:12 pm
    VV Dammit! I mean @angrynerd :-/

    Too much effort to fix... (all those links, eh?)
  35. Profile photo of ferdyfred
    ferdyfred Male 40-49
    13602 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 7:10 pm
    Got about 40 percent of em
    Im partial nerd
  36. Profile photo of freddyferret
    freddyferret Male 40-49
    11742 posts
    July 21, 2013 at 10:40 pm
    I got them, but I`m not sure I want them.
  37. Profile photo of Tiredofnicks
    Tiredofnicks Male 30-39
    5101 posts
    July 22, 2013 at 2:58 am
    I love nerd humor.
  38. Profile photo of Runemang
    Runemang Male 30-39
    2676 posts
    July 22, 2013 at 4:55 pm
    I know I`m a nerd but I figured I`d miss most of `em ... nope ... I only "didn`t get" one ... the cat/roof one but I`m sure it`s a physics measurement joke.
  39. Profile photo of Wendypants
    Wendypants Female 30-39
    2420 posts
    July 23, 2013 at 6:08 am
    Ha, got about 2/3 rds of them... good jokes!

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