Paul Harvey: If I Were The Devil

Submitted by: auburnjunky 4 years ago

Recorded by Paul Harvey in 1965. Prophetic, no? (There you go Aj - Kitteh)
There are 54 comments:
Male 881
If I were the Devil, I wouldn`t exist.
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Male 4,298
CrakrJak, you apparently have no idea how torturous your uber-partisan comments are. Zing!
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Female 6,381
If I were the Devil, I`d be exhorting people to support their different religions and feelings of superiority over one another. More religion = more conflict = more dead souls.
Paul Harvey`s got it backwards.
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Male 5,811
If I was Satan, I`d be burning in the Lake of Fire like all the other sinners. Satan doesn`t rule anything.
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Female 2,602
[quote]markust: You quit frankly suck at thinking about torture.[/quote]
That`s like criticising him for not being a very good arsehole.
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Male 17,512
markust: You quit frankly suck at thinking about torture. Then again, sucking is a sport for you, isn`t it?
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Male 380
Grumpy old man...
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Male 928
So nothing has changed since 1965 cool I guess we know what everything will be like in another 100 or 1000 years yeah?
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Male 4,298
If I was the devil I would create the worst torture imaginable - locking someone in a room with CrakrJak for all eternity.
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Male 926
I`m with Jaime.
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Male 25,416
WIN!!
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Male 15,832
...good DAY!
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Male 17,512
jamie: I`m smart enough to know you`re the quintessence of a troll. So just go back under your bridge.
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Male 3,310
Wow, so he was old even back in 1965.
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Male 646
If I were the devil... PARTY AT MY PLACE!
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Male 2,345
CrakrJak

you simply put, are too stupid to ever be the devil...so alas we are safe!
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Male 4,431
If I were the devil I`d be a white, racist, classist, bigot who avoided military via my father`s money and connections, yet I`d send soldiers to war over oil upon the weakest of manufactured "intelligence". I`d look at our national budget, and, having been handed a budget surplus, I`d lower taxes -AND- provide tax refund `stimulus` such that the net budget surplus would disappear and I`d create a debt so staggering that it`d take several terms in office to if it (if it could be fixed). If I were the devil I`d preach about being godly and going god`s work, but, other than supporting AIDS research and treatment around the world (a good thing0, I`d cut funding for healthcare, contraception, sex education, and scientific endeavors that might help ease suffering, all the while with my eye on producing staggering, heretofore unheard of profits for the oil industry, even while the country wallowed in recession and economic woe. In other words, I`d be Dub`ya.
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Male 213
If I was the devil I`d turn people into pathological altruists, get people doing and justifying morally questionable things under the pretext that they are doing it for the `greater good`. That way you rob Altruism of any meaning and so you take away the genuinely nice persons only weapon.x
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Male 17,512
If I were the devil, I`d be a `multi-racial` politician running for president on the promise of uniting people and promoting hope and change.

After getting elected, I`d do my best to keep dividing people by forcing unpopular polices onto the public. I`d tell one side one thing and the other side another. I`d raise unemployment, gas prices, taxes and burdensome regulations.

I`d allow students to protest until their media usefulness is spent, then use the police to break them up. I`d interject myself into racial tensions with words like, "If I had a son, he`d look like him". I`d threaten judges and bureaucrats into submission. I`d thwart any investigation into my history. I`d let guns `walk` right into drug dealers hands, so that I could pass more gun laws. I`d throw anyone under the bus that exposed how radical I really am.

In other words I`d just keep doing what Barrack Obama is doing.
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Male 508
If I were the devil I`d be a christian. With terms like `flock` and `sheep` and `lamb` it would be easy to lead them over the cliff.
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Male 2,516
alright I`m bored... bye!
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Male 10,339
I love you `Zira.
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Female 2,228
I`d turn Ethics on it`s head and declare that Self Interest, in the Objectivist sense, is the highest virtue, that there can be no greater calling for mankind than to shed the shackles of "care" for others, that being weak or vulnerable or empathically aware (in short a living breathing human being) is a grave moral Evil. That the true moral paradigm is the Rapacious sociopath who simply takes what he wants with no nevermind to anyone else.

That`s what a devil is. "And that, ladies and gentlemen, is...the rest of...the story."
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Female 2,228
I`d despoil the most relevant and ethically demanded parts of Religion by ripping Compassion and Human Feeling for Others out of the picture altogether. In my travesty of Religion, there is only room for Purity and Power, for defining who is in and who is out, who is most Pure and like myself and who is not. And what within my religious tradition most supports those with Power, since after all, the proverb goes, "The Powerful will inherit the Earth." I will ignore the pleas for help by those who most need it, since as we know, they are just parasites in truth, and not fit to be listened to in the first place.

(last cont)
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Male 10,339
Okay simbha. Thank you.

That`s how you point, counterpoint kiddos.
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Female 2,228
I`d convince those who are well off that they got there all by themselves, they are "self made men" despite the society that paid to educate them, that paid policemen and firemen and emergency personnel to guard and care for them, that built the roads and the bridges and the traffic lights, that supplied the labor, so that they had the opportunity to get where they are today. I`d crush completely the responsibility toward that society that allowed me to get as far as I have, by saying that giving back in some small way to the next Big Idea and upcoming little guy ready to become the next Important Person is tantamount to robbery.

(cont)
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Male 412
AJ:"[...] considering that most of it was not even dreamed of back in the 60`s. Like the sexual disease with no cure, and the metal detectors and drug sniffing dogs in schools and such."

STIs/STDs have been around since around the 16th century. The ability for medicine to treat these issues waxed and waned between then and the 1960s. In the 1960s, the introduction of mass-produced antibiotics made STIs less of an issue, and many people assumed that this was the end. However, anyone with even a basic understanding of the development of superior strands (which has been known since the 1940s) would understand that this wouldn`t last.

Industrial metal detectors were first introduced in the 1960s, too. Their usage in other applications, including mitigation of security threats, isn`t a stretch.

I`m not saying it`s an uninteresting video, but it`s not amazing or prophetic.
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Male 144
I`m going to end every speech I give by blurting out my name, that was hilarious.

... PAUL HARVEY!
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Male 2,516
If I was trying to get people into hell to have them suffer for eternity, I could probably think of more efficient ways.

And I don`t even have super powers or an eternity to think about it!
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Female 2,228
If I were the devil, I`d convince the largest religious affiliation in the country to believe that they were somehow under attack and persecuted. That simply because they have the largest numbers, they have some divine mandate to run the nation`s secular institutions as they do their churches. I`d convince them that the Constitution is part of their particular holy writ, despite there being no mention in it at all of anything like the Virgin birth, the Trinity or the Resurrection.

I`d exploit the differences between groups seeking after the common good, pitting them against one another in petty "wedge issue" battles that have little to do with what really ails the nation to divert them from seeking justice and better lives for themselves and their children, and the creation of community itself.

(cont)
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Male 3,445
"This Christian believes Evolution is a tool of God. As is Science."

I can respect that. Cherish this rare moment.
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Male 762
"...and they have all happened. That`s called prophecy."

It isn`t that they have all happened, it is that they have always happened. They were happening when this was recorded, before this was recorded and will continue to happen. It isn`t prophecy, it is commentary.
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Male 10,339
<---- This Christian believes Evolution is a tool of God. As is Science.
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Male 10,339
@Otto: Maybe.
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Male 3,445
"He said "Deifying science". Different."

Not really, since when religious people complain about evolution they`re basically saying that they don`t like God being removed from the process. Creationists developed the whole "watchmaker" analogy to combat the idea that nature is God.
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Male 10,339
Ahhhh. Point taken.
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Male 438
If I were the devil I would make religions unfalsifiable so that everyone can claim their god is the real god but no one can objectively prove they are right, I would put the major religions holy lands in the same geographical area. I would then give them enough knowledge to make weapons of mass destruction so they can kill each other.

Prophetic, no?.....no
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Male 2,516
@auburnjunky: If I was the devil, I would be banished from heaven
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Male 10,339
@Jendrian: We aren`t "banished from heaven". We haven`t been there yet. How is that "banished"?
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Male 10,339
No Prussia: He said "Deifying science". Different.
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Male 10,339
Plus, I don`t necessarily agree with all the things he says in the video. I just think Paul Harvey is one of the greatest radio broadcasters of all time, and some of the things he says are pretty striking, considering that most of it was not even dreamed of back in the 60`s. Like the sexual disease with no cure, and the metal detectors and drug sniffing dogs in schools and such.
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Male 3,445
"The picture used didn`t match the audio."

But Harvey also complained about "elevating science."
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Male 2,516
If I were the devil I would do lots of that too, and try to use my super powers for making people happier than they could ever be under the rule of that tyrannical, blood-thirsty and narcissistic a-hole that banished me from its precious "heaven".
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Male 808
If I give it more than 2 shakes, it is fapping...
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Male 10,339
"If I cut my hair, it will grow back. Prophecy!"

In a manner of speaking, yes.
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Male 2,440
I feel like I`ve just stepped into the mind of AJ. Now I need a shower.
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Male 3,445
"...and they have all happened. That`s called prophecy."

If I cut my hair, it will grow back. Prophecy!
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Male 10,339
"These are the same things the church has always screamed about"

...and they have all happened. That`s called prophecy.
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Male 762
If I were a leprechaun.

This isn`t prophetic. These are the same things the church has always screamed about, and it is simply because they cannot control them.
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Male 10,339
The picture used didn`t match the audio.

Plus, I`m not perfect lol.
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Male 3,445
I won`t even get into what I think about this. AJ knows I disagree with most of it already, so we don`t need to argue.

But didn`t you say the other day that you believe in evolution, AJ? This video seems to be in opposition to that.
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Female 2,602
Not really that prophetic, no. Much of it could apply to any period in human history, and it remains most relevant to the period it was spoken in.
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Male 10,339
Thanks Kitteh. I just though this was pretty cool, and would spark some fun debate.
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Male 10,339
Link: Paul Harvey: If I Were The Devil [Rate Link] - Recorded by Paul Harvey in 1965. Prophetic, no? (There you go Aj - Kitteh)
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