Fake Doughnuts: A Grade-School Kid`s Essay [Pic]

Submitted by: hole_rocks89 5 years ago in Funny

The kid"s right--it shouldn"t be called a doughnut. I"m convinced, A+!
There are 41 comments:
Male 583
@robosnitz....where does it say the writer is female??? stupid americans
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Female 1,356
haha, I like this kid, but plain is my favourite un-flavour.
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Male 2,737
LMAO!!!!! I like those donuts for dunking in my coffee, but she`s right,lol. There about as good as a dunkin donuts bagel.
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Male 1,045
@SarahofBorg
Flash news: coffee is not exclusive to the U.S., illegal immigrants make some of the best coffee ever, specially Colombian and Mexican immigrants.
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Male 6,227
donut with maple sugar frosting and a black coffee = culinary orgasm
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Female 3,562
evanbartlett, I agree. I`ve lived in the Boston area my whole life and I even briefly worked at Dunkin Donuts and they seriously make the worst coffee on the planet. Their staff is made entirely of druggies and illegal immigrants who wouldn`t know coffee from used engine oil.
The donuts are decent though. You really can`t screw up a doughnut. But Krispy Creme is 10,000 times better.
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Female 3,562
If you`re going to actually dunk your doughnut the frosting and glazes are just going to ruin your coffee.
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Female 1,566
old fashioned doughnuts are amazing, this kid is ignorant as hell.
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Male 771
doughnuts are not bagels. stupid kid.
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Male 423
Kid is a better writer then me,and totally right about these fake doughnuts.
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Male 25,417
stupid arguement
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Male 2,376
"Also have to say, all the words are spelled correctly, proper grammar was used & the handwriting is actually the neatest I`ve seen in a while. All 3 are rarities amongst children these days. This one is worthy of the fridge door IMHO..."

i know right? and hes only 20
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Male 226
"Also have to say, all the words are spelled correctly, proper grammar was used & the handwriting is actually the neatest I`ve seen in a while. All 3 are rarities amongst children these days. This one is worthy of the fridge door IMHO..."

While the grammar is miles better than most people I know, it`s still not completely accurate.
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Male 768
It`s called an old-fashioned and it`s delicious...
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Female 2,927
i can understand his reasoning, i always felt that a cupcake without frosting is nothing more than a glorified muffin.
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Male 535
@Student Law
I think that stick up your arse might be making you a bit irritable...
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Male 535
Also have to say, all the words are spelled correctly, proper grammar was used & the handwriting is actually the neatest I`ve seen in a while. All 3 are rarities amongst children these days. This one is worthy of the fridge door IMHO...
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Male 2,376
actually its cake.. bagels were made by accident one day when a baker forgot the yeast!!!!! do you damn research kid!!!!
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Male 559
Oh, regarding the kid, I was impressed with his/her sense of humor and ability to draw a story from a brief observation. Appreciating the classics may be a dying art form, but good writing is even rarer.
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Male 559
I had my first `Dunkin` Donut` a few weeks ago when I was visiting NY. (Why I never had one in Boston is still a mystery.) It was actually pretty gross. Sure, it`s a doughnut (donut, whatever) so it is full of fat and sugar, but save the inherent doughnut-ness of it, it was pretty poor. The coffee was simply horrendous. Truck-stop watered-down swill. I`ll keep my Peet`s Coffee in the Bay Area, thank you very much.
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Male 132
@Student_Law
You must be a hit at all the parties.
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Male 1,010
This is the gluttony of the typical American child, overwhelming it`s long lost sense of business.

Only a few decades ago an American child would rest assured that this piece of grease- drenched ring of fast carbohydrates had a purpose, to fulfill a part of the market that in the end met the needs of someone with a different taste than him.

The young and promising businessman is long gone, and left is the little 200 pound 11 year old garbage disposal - built to feast on McDonald`s, brainwashed by a hypnotizing screen, scared inside his walls by FOX news, only to die from a heart attack at 33 - 22 years after he declared that a grease- ring was not a grease- ring; because it did not meet his expectations of brightly colorized chemical visualization that his food for sure must meet.
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Male 297
Congratulations! All the whiners have managed to argue with a kid! Does it make you feel better about yourselves now? Why not just go all the way and beat up a wheelchair-bound midget with scoleosis and Down`s Syndrome? HAHAHAHAHAHA! Dee-duh-dee!
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Male 406
"what it says about Americans that they could spell a nut made of dough `donut` I will leave to you"

The spelling "donut" was introduced by Dunkin Donuts. After so long it became part of the American lexicon. The correct spelling even in America is "doughnut" even though Opera`s spell check doesn`t think so. And as everyone knows, there are a lot of lazy, sheep over on this side of the pond. But this isn`t anything new, Aspirin was once a brand name, but it was used so often as a generic term for pain relievers that it became a word with a definition. Also the world over, people today are bastardizing all languages since the advent of texting. You see the slang everywhere, not just in texts.
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Male 159
plain ones are meant to be eaten with coffee!
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Male 15,182
Author has no respect for the classics.
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Male 977
Yeah lay it to em IAB! Plain doughnuts are the best coffee dippers!
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Male 2,591
Plain doughnuts are the best ones quit trippin
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Female 357
I agree with unmercyfuldu, the plain ones are best!
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Male 17,512
The reason they have holes is because street vendors would sell them from a long stick to passersby.
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Male 1,293
Madduck - my point exactly. What is it with these Americans ruining perfectly good food, eh?
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Male 762
Those are the best donuts!
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Male 1,093
Though i wouldnt call them"fake" i do agree with this kid. I would give him or her an A
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Female 7,995
Okay- now a fresh HOT doughnut with a little castor sugar sprinkled on top is nice- but those cold iced jobs are just wrong......
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Male 259
you can eat two boston creme doughnuts for less calories than a bagel
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Male 1,293
It is a nut shape. It is made of dough. Hence it is a doughnut (what it says about Americans that they could spell a nut made of dough `donut` I will leave to you). "Doughnuts" that are not toroid shaped are fake. They are dough balls.

The only good doughnut is a plain one, fresh from the fryer and still warm, dipped in a little dusting of sugar.
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Male 1,240
Kid`s out of his mind.
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Male 39,544

i love this kid

:-D
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Female 2,509
donut with nothing added = donut
donut with sugar coating = sugar donut
donut with filling = eg strawberry donut, custard donut
donut with XXX sugar = powdered donut

nuff said....
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Male 5,811
I suppose if a `bagel` is made of sugar and greasy fat, then yes.
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Female 353
Link: Fake Doughnuts: A Grade-School Kid`s Essay [Pic] [Rate Link] - The kid`s right--it shouldn`t be called a doughnut. I`m convinced, A+!
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