Buy Your Sweetie This For Valentine`s Day... [Pic]

Submitted by: f0rk0 5 years ago in Misc

Get laid for sure.
There are 18 comments:
Male 1,569
A man gave his wife a grave with tombstone for her 65th birthday. When she turned 70, she asked him what big present she`d get this time. He answered, well you haven`t even used the one I gave you at your 65th birthday...
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Male 15,832
...complete with a tombstone that says, "Died Tragically Rescuing Her Family From The Remains Of A Destroyed Sinking Battleship."
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Male 1,010
I just tie a ribbon around my penis and surprise her on the morning of valentines.
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Male 15,259
Well beats a beating.
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Female 4,084
yeah, that certainly gets me hot and wet
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Male 6,737
She`d be so happy with that!
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Female 4,408
oooo how thoughtful! does this come life large life insurance policy on payment of "accidental" death?
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Male 2,516
We`ve already made pre-arrangements: donate every healthy organ, give the rest to science
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Male 25,416
SO romantic!
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Male 40,728
You`ll get laid alright, in that $3,000 casket you just bought!
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Male 622
@Gerry101 dnt worry your "other half" wasnt goign to spend yoru life insurance on anything else.

@beardtats LMFAO
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Male 7,123
I want a Gram Parsons special.
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Male 255
my parents ask i simply put them out with the trash on tuesday morning, for city garbage pick-up.

i personally want to be shot into the sun in a rocket.

as for my partner.....i`m gonna keep banging her until her body starts to decompose.
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Male 12,365
[quote]I told my other half not to even claim my body. It`s just waste material. Let the state dump me in a landfill or something, I don`t care, I`m not there anymore. Use the insurance money on a fabulous vacation to help "get over the loss". [/quote]

I have a similar view - all of my family are well aware that my preferences for my corpse are:

1) Recycle anything useful (I`m on the "donate everything" register).

2) Research or medical training with anything left after (1).

3) Burn what`s left after (1) and (2) and tip it down a drain.

Although I`m not bothered about (3). Use it as fertiliser. Feed it to dogs. Preserve it and use it as a doorstop. No reason for me to care.

Equally, if it helps them to make a song and dance over it, conduct rituals or whatever, then they can feel free to do so. Seems a waste to me, but I won`t be there to care.
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Female 8,045
Sod that , take any bits you think you can use and stick the rest in a hole somewhere...
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Male 39,880

I told my other half not to even claim my body. It`s just waste material. Let the state dump me in a landfill or something, I don`t care, I`m not there anymore.

Use the insurance money on a fabulous vacation to help "get over the loss".
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Male 657
Screw that. Like I told my wife, I promised to be with her till death do us part. I`m getting my own grave.
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Female 482
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