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Date: 10/15/11 03:53 PM

60 Responses to Brace Yourself For A World With No Coffee

  1. Profile photo of kitteh9lives
    kitteh9lives Female 70 & Over
    8044 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 12:41 pm
    Link: Brace Yourself For A World With No Coffee - No mo` Joe & they`re predicting the extinction of chocolate too! All due to environmental changes.Let the hoarding begin
  2. Profile photo of efFofexX
    efFofexX Male 18-29
    1 post
    October 15, 2011 at 4:05 pm
    poo just got real. We have to stop global warming
  3. Profile photo of Buzzard250
    Buzzard250 Male 18-29
    342 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 4:14 pm
    Al Gore was right! NOOOOO!
  4. Profile photo of CCMA_19
    CCMA_19 Female 18-29
    311 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 4:19 pm
    ANYTHING BUT CHOCOLATE!!! I can do without coffee, I don`t like the taste but CHOCOLATE TOO??
  5. Profile photo of Klamz
    Klamz Male 18-29
    689 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 4:30 pm
    Coffee Drinker> OMG THE HUMANITY!!!!!!!!!!!! NOO!!!

    Normal Person> Okay.

    Can you spot the addict?
  6. Profile photo of LillianDulci
    LillianDulci Female 18-29
    2674 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 4:37 pm
    Fear mongers. I refuse to believe such a horrible thing will happen >:(
  7. Profile photo of heavypred
    heavypred Male 30-39
    249 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:06 pm
    Fringe?
  8. Profile photo of Loxen
    Loxen Female 30-39
    1387 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:10 pm
    So... move the growing location? What is the problem? Old spot getting too hot = Move to slightly cooler location. What am I missing here? :/
    Are Coffee beans against relocation or something?
    Bean: "No! My family is from Columbia! I got roots here!"
  9. Profile photo of SlothOfDoom
    SlothOfDoom Male 30-39
    2033 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:11 pm
    This is retarded. See, if places get too hot to grow cocoa, or arabica or what have you then OTHER places, which were once too cold will now be warmer and able to grow your plant of choice.
  10. Profile photo of ScottSerious
    ScottSerious Male 18-29
    5316 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:14 pm
    meh
  11. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25420 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:16 pm
    Coffee.. who drinks it for the flavour!
  12. Profile photo of botfly
    botfly Male 50-59
    616 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:16 pm
    What a crock of sh*t.And some people really believe this crap still.
  13. Profile photo of ledzeppeloyd
    ledzeppeloyd Male 18-29
    2385 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:20 pm
    so what if global warming is wrong, we just made the earth a better place to live for nothing?
  14. Profile photo of Norris
    Norris Male 18-29
    1011 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:26 pm
    coffee wont go extinct, its silly to even think so...besides tea is better anyhow :P

  15. Profile photo of snuffy2009
    snuffy2009 Male 18-29
    241 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 5:35 pm
    Double fisted? 0_o
  16. Profile photo of dude21862004
    dude21862004 Male 18-29
    768 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 6:00 pm
    Stop drinking coffee. 2-3 weeks later you`ll make your very own energy, and you won`t have to rely on caffeine to get through the day.
  17. Profile photo of CoyoteKing
    CoyoteKing Male 18-29
    2988 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 6:16 pm
    i call bull poo. also, if the equator area gets too hot that means that formally colder places further north and south will get warmer and the conditions will be right to grow those plants there instead. duh.
  18. Profile photo of CrakrJak
    CrakrJak Male 40-49
    17514 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 6:29 pm
    So the AGW idiots are ramping up the scaremongering yet again.
  19. Profile photo of MinPinRage
    MinPinRage Female 30-39
    64 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 6:44 pm
    NO! SAY IT AIN`T SO! can`t live w/out coffee, cigs, and chocolate. its bad enough that peanut butter`s going up 40% to 50% in the next few weeks.
  20. Profile photo of Squidbush
    Squidbush Male 40-49
    803 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 7:04 pm
    Yup. Sounds like fear-mongering to justify more price hikes.
  21. Profile photo of piperfawn
    piperfawn Male 30-39
    4916 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 7:22 pm
    fatninja i drink coffee for the flavour, usualy i drink it without sugar . I drink moka or espresso, not american or english cofee.
  22. Profile photo of frenchroast
    frenchroast Male 30-39
    446 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 8:47 pm
    expect zombies stumbling down streets mumbling , "beeeeaans".
  23. Profile photo of mcboozerilla
    mcboozerilla Male 30-39
    646 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 9:24 pm
    That`s very interesting. If an exec at Starbuck`s is warning Congress about coffee supply due to global warming, you know this has to be serious.
  24. Profile photo of Coolhandluke
    Coolhandluke Male 18-29
    95 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 9:56 pm
    Who cares i have not drunk a single cup of coffee in my life every here is an addict.
  25. Profile photo of carmium
    carmium Female 50-59
    6381 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 10:01 pm
    Bah. I`m calling shenanigans. I don`t believe it`s going to happen; there are just too many "expert" doomsayers out there.
  26. Profile photo of britt566
    britt566 Female 18-29
    2290 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 10:23 pm
    Watch the murder rate go ^
  27. Profile photo of andfrank03
    andfrank03 Male 18-29
    68 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 10:45 pm
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
  28. Profile photo of AtomicSkier9
    AtomicSkier9 Male 18-29
    1085 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 10:47 pm
    Here`s my reaction!

    http://youtu.be/cgwlJIo0In0
  29. Profile photo of Draculya
    Draculya Male 40-49
    14654 posts
    October 15, 2011 at 11:34 pm
    Quick, let`s divert our spending on cancer research to genetically modifying the Arabica plant. It`s a matter of priorities, people.
  30. Profile photo of tsiemens
    tsiemens Male 30-39
    515 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 3:07 am
    I can`t believe they still push global warming as fact, this is nothing more than propaganda of the west
  31. Profile photo of Flashpacker
    Flashpacker Male 18-29
    702 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 3:31 am
    I was eating chocolate and drinking coffe when i saw this and it suddenly tasted much better
  32. Profile photo of kairobert
    kairobert Male 18-29
    1623 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 3:41 am
    "I can`t believe they still push global warming as fact, this is nothing more than propaganda of the west"

    You are stupid for not taking into consideration motives when crying out propaganda. What motives do scientists have to `lie about global warming`?
    What motives do you have to lie to yourself that global warming is false? Many.
  33. Profile photo of Agent00Smith
    Agent00Smith Male 18-29
    2581 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 4:43 am
    The consciousness of the world will change so that stimulants are no longer necessary to force you through your daily life.
  34. Profile photo of Dad4Life
    Dad4Life Male 50-59
    2086 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 5:36 am
    He is a CEO of a Starbucks. I don`t think that qualifies him as an expert on anything except how to get people to pay $5 for a cup of coffee.
  35. Profile photo of Bojib
    Bojib Male 30-39
    29 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 5:42 am
    shenanigans
  36. Profile photo of NILE12
    NILE12 Male 18-29
    157 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 7:21 am
    your hot chocolate is poo
  37. Profile photo of Muert
    Muert Male 30-39
    153 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 8:12 am
    SCfan- That means he pays a lot of expert to watch out for threats to his company. He doesn`t need to be an expert, he just needs to listen to them.
  38. Profile photo of Rawrg
    Rawrg Male 18-29
    934 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 8:14 am
    OH NOES IT`S GLOBAL WARMING AGAIN!!!!1 EVERYTHING GOOD WILL DIE!!!!1 Sigh...
  39. Profile photo of Rawrg
    Rawrg Male 18-29
    934 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 8:17 am
    @kairobert

    There are plenty of scientists motivated to push the case for global warming. Firstly, if global warming weren`t viewed as apocalyptic, then they wouldn`t receive funding from various governments to study the climate. Who do you think pays for this stuff, or do you think they`re just doing it for free? Secondly, they have biases like the rest of us. Anyone with even a modicum of science background knows that there are too many variables to predict global climate with a practical degree of accuracy, as so many things change year to year. Solar intensity, the makeup of the atmosphere, weather patterns in general. One year it may rain 20" in a region, and another it may rain 5". It`s not consistent.
  40. Profile photo of BexyWexy
    BexyWexy Female 30-39
    63 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 8:19 am
    NO CAPPUCCINO WITH CHOCOLATE SHAVINGS :(

    Meh, idk. in 30 odd years we`ll have found a good substitute i`m sure, because fake tastes is the way we`re going ahead.
  41. Profile photo of randomxnp
    randomxnp Male 30-39
    1293 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 9:32 am
    So, plants that survived through the Little Ice Age when it was (colder than today) and through the Mediaeval Warm Period (when it was a little warmer) in the wild are going to go extinct if the temperature rises by perhaps another half degree, despite human intervention in a hugely valuable crop. Riiiiiigghht.

    So this comes from the "Director of Sustainability" from a company that makes vast profits from pretending to follow left-wing politics and the Union of Concerned Scientists.

    The UCS, by the way, is an organisation that you can join if you have a valid credit or debit card. If they have since started to accept PayPal you might not even need that. It is nothing to do with science.
  42. Profile photo of randomxnp
    randomxnp Male 30-39
    1293 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 9:34 am
    Oh, and until he can get his company to make a decent black coffee, which is its purpose, then perhaps they should concentrate there. I will only go to Starbucks if there is no alternative serving ground coffee, even McDonalds does better.
  43. Profile photo of Baelzar
    Baelzar Male 40-49
    1399 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 10:44 am
    Jesus H. tittyfu#king Christ. Like I needed another reason not to go to Starbucks besides their shi#y coffee.

    Coffee is VALUABLE. If it`s valuable, they will find a way.

    Hydroponics? Maybe, I dunno, MOVE THE COFFEE PLANTATION NORTH?
  44. Profile photo of redspade
    redspade Male 13-17
    150 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 11:14 am
    Now THIS is how you get people to care about global warming.
  45. Profile photo of cleanergirl
    cleanergirl Female 30-39
    109 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 1:36 pm
    Eh. They`ll just figure out a way to grow it hydroponically and it`ll be super expensive.
  46. Profile photo of jendrian
    jendrian Male 18-29
    2516 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 2:28 pm
    no way... we don`t care we don`t like coffee anyway
  47. Profile photo of jeanpaul91
    jeanpaul91 Male 18-29
    128 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 3:09 pm
    she`s double fisted with her coffee? that must hurt
  48. Profile photo of furryblob
    furryblob Male 18-29
    574 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 3:28 pm
    If this comes to pass, watch out you global warming skeptics, I`m going postal!
  49. Profile photo of lisalezah
    lisalezah Female 18-29
    255 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 6:04 pm
    Those people wouldn`t want to live in this world without coffee!? With talk like that, you`d think coffee is as bad as heroin
  50. Profile photo of Wowummwow
    Wowummwow Male 18-29
    265 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 7:43 pm
    Report: "The ice caps are melting from climate change and will bring dramatic changes for future generations"
    Reaction: "Hippy socialist tree hugger extremists suck and climate change is a conspiracy."

    Report: "No more coffee from climate change"
    Reaction: "Oh the humanity!!! If only we did more to stop this!!!"
  51. Profile photo of Wowummwow
    Wowummwow Male 18-29
    265 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 7:47 pm
    "i call bull poo. also, if the equator area gets too hot that means that formally colder places further north and south will get warmer and the conditions will be right to grow those plants there instead. duh."

    Often plants require much more than a proper temperature to grow which makes this `brilliant` idea null.
  52. Profile photo of Gibleto
    Gibleto Male 18-29
    28 posts
    October 16, 2011 at 9:56 pm
    Oh God no...
  53. Profile photo of xCYBERDYNEx
    xCYBERDYNEx Male 18-29
    4903 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 2:44 am
    Who needs coffee when you can


  54. Profile photo of LuckyDave
    LuckyDave Male 18-29
    675 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 4:26 am
    I`m sorry, but any "scientific" data that comes from a chain store so hopped up on its own ego that it charges outrageous prices for mediocre coffee, is asinine.
  55. Profile photo of McGovern1981
    McGovern1981 Male 30-39
    14268 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 8:07 am
    Coffee.. who drinks it for the flavour!

    I do!! I take it you`ve never had freshly ground coffee straight from Costa Rica NOMMY! Coffee is second most legally traded commodity in the world it will not go extinct there`s too much money in it.
  56. Profile photo of xerch
    xerch Male 18-29
    195 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 12:26 pm
    2 Thoughts:
    - That seems to be a warning sign that coffee - also chocolate - prices will go up soon and they will claim that will be caused by the environment changes: More expensive venti for you!!!
    - It`s ridiculous the amount of coffe and chocolate that we (human beings) eat and drink. It`s insane that one of the most consumed thing in the whole world IS COFFEE!!!!
  57. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10742 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 1:38 pm
    If there`s demand there`ll be a way.
  58. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10742 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 1:38 pm
    GENETIC ENGINEERING TO THE RESCUE!!!!
  59. Profile photo of PinkHomicide
    PinkHomicide Female 18-29
    355 posts
    October 17, 2011 at 9:27 pm
    Media scare to justify higher prices? Best marketing scheme ever.
  60. Profile photo of Sev
    Sev Male 18-29
    44 posts
    October 19, 2011 at 3:09 am
    I like how "environmental changes" are going to kill off everything, because, you know, the climate`s never changed before or anything. Oh, wait. I`m pretty sure a lot of plant and animal species were around before previous climate shifts that are still alive today. Media doomsday speakers, I swear. Even if "global warming" occurs to the point of changing the terrestrial climate significantly I call bs on the coffee/chocolate extinction. Why? One word.

    Greenhouses.

    Look at that. The climate changes dramatically a good four times every year. We call them seasons. And when a certain crop doesn`t grow in unfavorable weather...take it inside, control temperature, humidity, barometric pressure, etc... and you create artificially viable growing conditions. Really, how do you think you can get potatoes any time of the year?

    "Global Warming" - The Analog Y2K Syndrome

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