Learn How To Flirt

Submitted by: Fancys_Asst 5 years ago in Funny

Learn the timeless art of seduction in 90 seconds. Warning: Slightly rapey.
There are 23 comments:
Female 606
@Lord_Jereth You`re a lifesaver. I knew I was doing it wrong all this time.
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Male 77
...poor Melvin. :/
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Male 723
@last_metroid

Glad I could help. *chuckles*

It never ceases to amaze me, walking down the isle of the local supermarket, to still see ladies` magazines with articles like, "10 tips to get a man," or "50 things that will drive him crazy in bed."

Seriously?

Here`s the secret, ladies: jam a sammich in our mouths and touch our junk. Simple, easy and straight to the point. I just saved you 10+ bucks on that trashy, disastrously overpriced, advertisement stuffed magazine. You`re welcome.

8-) LJ
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Male 2,737
Not helpful at all.
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Female 87
I didn`t think it was slightly rapey at all... :/ Hard to take this serious.
Learned something from Lord_Jareth though, I`m totally going to use his #2 pickup line sometime LOL
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Male 723
... science.

8-) LJ
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Male 723
Um, why is this always made out to be so complicated? We men are simple creatures. It`s not hard to please us or pick us up.

"Is there the perfect pickup line?"

Why yes, there are many:

1) I want you to take me home, bend me over the kitchen table and make me scream your name - right now, soldier!

2) Hi, you don`t know me but could I get you to slam-f*ck me for about an hour or so?

3) See these double-D`s? They`re in the mood for motor-boating. Wanna be the motor?

4) I wanna chow your dong/I swallow.

and the number one pick up line:

5) I have a vagina, I`m clean, fixed, single, have no children, have a job, live alone in a house I own free and clear and have a case of Bud and a well stocked ice box and XBox 360 at my place. I`m emotionally stable and take good care of my appearance. Also, I deep throat and love anal. Interested?

Any combination of these will do the trick, ladies. It`s not rocket
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Male 94
Anybody else think she was Jenna Marbles for a good 30 seconds?
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Female 934
Anyone else only look at this because it was labeled "slightly rapey"?
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Male 1,216
@Revolutioniz, yes, I 100% agree with you! I would also drat the brains out of this woman.
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Male 38,462

Ladies, let me clue you in.

If he makes eye contact with your boobs he`s flirting.
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Female 734
circa 1982 vacation bible school
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Male 4,902
She was very seductive with those shoulder pads
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Male 911
Wow i was thinking about it for so long, but i finally realized who she sounds like... ready for this.? Jenna Marbles. Amirite?
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Male 3,462
But if I make eye contact, they`ll steal my soul!!!!
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Male 575
... How much you wanna bet she`s single...
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Male 1,010
LOL!!!

The ending was epic: "Everything is terrible!" WTF does that mean?!! HAHA!
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Female 452
Watch the video at the end with the older lady practicing flirting with her fluffy little rat dog.
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Male 4,547
... Creepy, not rapey.. the other thing today, now THAT is rapey.
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Male 25,416
meh...lolz
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Female 3,598
where`s the rapey part?
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Male 15,510
MELVIN
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Female 1,780
Link: Learn How To Flirt [Rate Link] - Learn the timeless art of seduction in 90 seconds. Warning: Slightly rapey.
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