6 Things Men Do To Get Laid...

Submitted by: MorfeuS 5 years ago in Funny
http://www.cracked.com/article_18440_6-things-men-do-to-get-laid-that-science-says-turn-women-off.html?wa_user1=4&wa_user2=Sex&wa_user3=article&wa_user4=recommended

That science says turn women off.
There are 36 comments:
Female 5,222
cracked! i havent been there in ages XD
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Male 56
So, thing to learn, don`t try too hard. So anyone who sought that article out just self sabotaged.
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Male 707
Does #2 mean that it`s the womens fault that this planet sucks?
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Male 8,302
Apparently, we`re Doing It Wrong.
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Male 934
This article is stupid. These things only qualify if she`s into you or not, which, since this is mainly applying to bar hookup scenarios, she`ll determine in 30 milliseconds by the way you look. If it`s actually in the real world, if you`re mildly attractive and don`t set off the douche alarm, you can do all of these things within reason and still be fine.

Kind of like us guys hate it when unattractive / annoying women are all over us, sitting in our laps, flirting with us, acting like they know us when they don`t, spewing small talk banalities our way, etc. Depending on whether or not we`re interested in you, for whatever reason, determines how much crazy we`ll put up with.
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Male 10,440
So according to this article... I should just be rich and not care. Right... might as well hire a prostitute then.
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Male 347
EVERYTHING. everything a man normally does is to get laid. thats why we have jobs and shower and buy stuff. without the perspective of getting some ass men would still live in caves.
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Male 352
Number 1 is so true. Whenever I talk to a girl who I find attractive I forget the how the entire English language works and end up making her think I`m an idiot.
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Male 25,416
They forget... being a douche!
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Male 880
Just be rich... nuff said.
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Female 1,356
I rather like the name George.
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Male 1,268
"Tall, rich, funny, sexy, single, strong, good-looking, smart, romantic, charming, warm, sweet, sensitive, clever, athletic, kind, generous, punctual, sincere, and of course be able to know exactly what is bothering her when you ask and she says "nothing"."

This is how I`ve introduced myself for the past ten years. Get outta my head.
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Male 38,478
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Male 37,774
vv @slut_etta my number is 555-CATS honey! ;-)
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Male 38,478

It`s not hard to figure out what women want in a man.
He just has to be tall, rich, funny, sexy, single, strong, good-looking, smart, romantic, charming, warm, sweet, sensitive, clever, athletic, kind, generous, punctual, sincere, and of course be able to know exactly what is bothering her when you ask and she says "nothing".
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Female 4,086
i guess i must be old fashioned and have low standards. i like a man who showers regularly, works for a living, doesn`t hit me, and treats my dog nice. and if he doesn`t have the table manners of a rabid baboon, that helps too.
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Male 4,902
This article is ancient.
Batmanners you are freaking hilarious sir
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Female 407
Oh Cracked...what I would still be ignorant about if it weren`t for you. <3
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Male 38,478

On a first day, women want to know who you are as a person,
so it`s good to talk about yourself all night.

Also, she wants to know you don`t have intimacy issues so be sure
to touch her a lot. Especially in intimate areas such as the breasts and her ass.
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Male 697
Actually having just read them, they all sound totally wrong. I`ve seen many articles that suggest the exact opposite.
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Male 697
Im gonna need these tonight
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Male 757
batmanners is my new hero
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Male 4,004
As a straight guy, I know what women want. They want a guy who isn`t insecure about his sexuality. This makes them think "This guy is insecure, he must have a complex about the size of his penis". Let them know you don`t care, which tells them, you have a big dick.

Next time you want to impress a girl, start kissing dudes, even if they aren`t gay.... Kiss rape them.
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Male 4,004
"Instead, you should lower your eyes. Try staring at her breasts all night instead. She`ll dig it, and you."

I do that to girls I don`t give a crap about. They usually give me the "OMG YOU`RE STARING AT MY TITS!" look... to which I return with a "Yes I was checking out your tits, and I am not embarrassed you caught me" look.

If you`re going to put food out on the table, and I`m not allowed to eat it, I`ll at least stare at it.
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Male 183
@ZsaZsaGoar

i know you are only talking to me because my name is James. you dont fool me for a second.
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Male 4,004
The search for the right girl may be long and frustrating, but if you quickly learn what traits to look for and avoid, you can easily weed out the wrong girl for you very quickly and avoid the problem of "dating a complete bitch".

I like girls who are beautiful and know it and aren`t self conscious about it. Best way to find a girl who is confident? Make-up. Using make-up shows she is afraid to show her real self, as she feels judged, and failing at it without make-up. My girlfriend uses no make-up, ever, it`s almost weird, but w/e. At least she`s confident and doesn`t feel ugly for no reason.

Another thing? Smart. I hate dumb bitches. I tell them to their face, they say they aren`t dumb and go away and leave me alone, much to my satisfaction.
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Male 14,332
THIS GUY!! THIS GUY!!! THIS IS WHAT WOMEN WANNA SCREW WTF!!
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Male 14,332
[quote]Usually nice guys are a turn off cause they seem to not be confident to me, not cause they`re nice.[/quote]

So treating you like 5h!t is confidence I gotta work on being an a55hole I guess hear I was trying to be a decent human being. Thanks ladies this is why the world has turned to crap.


"The truest characters of ignorance are vanity, pride and arrogance.”
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Male 38,478

As a gay man I can help you guys out here. Girls tell their gay friends everything so let me pass on to you what they say.

Women hate it...HATE IT... when you make direct eye contact. It`s confrontational.
Instead, you should lower your eyes. Try staring at her breasts all night instead. She`ll dig it, and you.
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Male 4,004
If you`re having a hard time ajusting yourself to make the girl happy, she probably isn`t the right girl for you.

If you have to change to make the girl happy, then you aren`t who she`s looking for, no matter how hot she may be. I found myself a girl I can be myself around, 100% comfortable, and she loves me for it, and I make her laugh, and she makes me happier than any other girl ever could.

The tips given here seem to promote being a "player" or a "man-ho"... they don`t apply to the real world where people want long-term commitment and love, as the women this lifestyle attracts are shallow sluts who will never make you happy because they are themselves unhappy.
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Female 144
@Jimbo all these things are accurate because they make MEN appear to be shallow and empty headed
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Female 144
All extremely accurate, except the nice one. Usually nice guys are a turn off cause they seem to not be confident to me, not cause they`re nice.
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Male 85
First one was "talking to her" are you freaking kidding me? last one was "having the wrong name"? wtf women, is this true? no wonder why you bitches get on my nerves so much! Why I rarely even bother to give you the time of day, let alone bend over backwards to get laid.
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Male 183
thank god i`m married..because apparently: women suck and are shallow and empty-headed.
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Male 14,332
Women want douchebags then they complain they hate men because they only date douchebags. This is how I know there is no god we need to push the restart button.
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Male 289
Link: 6 Things Men Do To Get Laid... [Rate Link] - That science says turn women off.
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