What Would Jesus NOT Do? [Pic]

Submitted by: fancylad 6 years ago in

If you believe that Jesus exists, of course.
There are 102 comments:
Male 5,413
I agree. Jesus WAS a hippy!
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Female 1,264
Jesus, if he existed, was a lot more like the hippies and a lot less like conservatives.
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Male 474
@skine
Uhh...Roman historical documents mark the fact that he was alive and that they crucified him. His existence was accounted for and documented by people all over the middle east and Roman empire.
You don`t have to believe he was the Messiah, but he was a real historical being.
And I agree completely with this post. Faved and shared.
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Male 382
I like how the last line has Attack the poor and side with the rich, like it is a rich vs poor cage match. What he would expect is for the rich to help the poor. And it should be done with love of your fellow man as the reason, not because it was governmentaly mandated.
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Male 719
"I like how it says, `If you believe that Jesus exists,` as if he wasn`t a real person."

It`s entirely plausible for someone to not believe that Jesus existed. The only evidence for his existence is the Bible, after all.
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Female 1,324
I`m going to print this out and glue it on a sign for the next time the church decides to riot or something stupid
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Male 328
I like how it says, "If you believe that Jesus exists," as if he wasn`t a real person. Seems like a really dumb comment unless they were just trying to say, "If you believe that Jesus is currently in heaven and watching over you," or something to that effect.
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Male 437
"You can`t seriously be arguing that statements in a religious book are objective proof that the beliefs of that religion are true."

Of course not. I never said anything about the beliefs of the religion being true. I don`t know anyone who believes that secular records can prove that a man who was born to a virgin, performed miracles, and raised himself from the dead ever existed. That is where the "faith" part of religion comes in.
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Male 99
Actually Luke 22:36 has Jesus saying it`s time to buy a sword. Seems contrary to Jesus NOT owning a weapon.
I do agree that some absolute jerks do these things in the name of Jesus and it needs to stop.

3 Things Jesus WOULD Do:
- Tell the truth even if it is un-PC
- Act independent of someone`s wealth, rich or poor
- Treat others with love and respect

Any problems with that?
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Male 12,365
[quote]Is this really surprising? The Bible, in case you are unaware, IS the historical and religious record of the people of Canaan.[/quote]

I wish I had 10,000 characters per post so I could repeat myself every time in order to ensure people won`t take part of my latest post and run with it.

I`m arguing that there is enough indirect evidence to indicate that it is probably true that a person of unknown name lived and just under 2000 years preached a set of reforms to Judaism that were radical enough to split Judaism and begin to form Christianity.

I`m arguing against the statement that the existence of Jesus is *proven from secular records*.

You can`t seriously be arguing that statements in a religious book are objective proof that the beliefs of that religion are true.
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Male 4,546
Cajun: You talking to me?

I`d rather have people do the research themselves, and it`s off topic anyway.

If you`d like *my* answer emailed to you or something I`d be happy to.
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Male 12,365
[quote]Lives of the Caesars - Claudius, sec. 25: "He banished from Rome all Jews, who were continually making disturbances at the instigation of one Chrestus."[/quote]

It`s odd that you would cite that as proof of the existence of Jesus.

The expulsion was ordered in 49AD.

"Chrestus" might have been a reference to Jesus or it might not.

If it was and it was accurate, then it would be stating that Jesus was alive and politically active in Rome in 49AD, more than 20 years after his alleged death and ascension. It would be surprising for a Christian to make that argument.

I think it`s an example of the indirect later references that are the only records that exist of Jesus, i.e. Tacitus (writing in ~115AD, i.e. NOT contempory) is referring to Christian faith, not to proven events. They might have been causing trouble *in the name of Jesus*, which once again proves only that Christians believed he existed.
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Male 437
"There are no references to him outside of the Christian bible except in the context of later writers describing what Christians believe or stating their own Christian belief."

Is this really surprising? The Bible, in case you are unaware, IS the historical and religious record of the people of Canaan.

Romans were in the business of putting down religious uprisings, so it stands to reason that they would not have records of Jesus. Christians, after all, did not worship Caesar, which was a tenant of the current religion of the Roman State. Do you really think the Romans would have acknowledged Jesus` existence?
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Male 437
"my point was that all the mythology was floating around the medeteranian long befor `Jesus time`. It`s more likely the new little cult adopted a few for their own use."

Jesus was Jewish, and Judaism had been around for over 2000 years when he came along. Early Christians were Jews that believed Jesus was the Messiah. In this way, Christianity is directly descended from Judaism.

Your assertion is that early Christians "took" stories from Egyptian religion. The relationship between the Egyptians and the Jews (the whole 400 year long slavery thing) makes it not so shocking that early Christians would attribute similar mythical characteristics to Jesus.
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Male 12,365
[quote]Wundt, Didnt Pliny the Younger, and other historians write of him?[/quote]

No.

They wrote about Christians` beliefs some time afterwards. That`s not the same thing.
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Male 12,365
[quote]Maybe you believe in God and maybe you dont. But not believing in Jesus is like not believing in Mohamed or Abraham Lincoln or Galileo. There are far too many references to him outside of the bible to just say "I aint never seen him so he dont existed."[/quote]

Which nobody is saying. You are wrong.

There are no references to him outside of the Christian bible except in the context of later writers describing what Christians believe or stating their own Christian belief.

You are wrong.

There are a vast number of references to Luke Skywalker outside of the Star Wars films. Does that constitute absolute proof that he`s a real person?

You are wrong.

You are just plain wrong in a variety of ways.
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Female 494
I love this. :)
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Male 1,678
Hey, what jerk poked out Jesus` eyes?
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Male 39,573

Never heard of "Zeitgeist".

Google it. There are dozens of websites to browse.
As in all things on the web, you have to be a bit
sceptical and not believe the first fanatical website
you find. But there are some ... legitimate? sites to peruse.

Legitimate and Religion... hmmmmmmm

Oxymoron?
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Male 382
Yea, but your point wasn`t based on fact. They came from a movie called Zeitgeist that is based on horrible half truths and twisted data.
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Male 39,573
DJDoubleb

my point was that all the mythology was floating around the medeteranian long befor "Jesus time". It`s more likely the new little cult adopted a few for their own use.

either that or Jesus was a copy cat.
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Male 382
And not "like" in the same sense as you either... :)
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Male 382
Horan raised no one from the dead. His mother Isis raised his father Osiris, then banged `em.

Tempted in the desert? In the Chester Beatty I, recto papyrus translation in "Ancient Egyptian Literature: New Kingdom" by Miriam Lichtheim, (ISBN 0520248430), pg. 219-220, Set (Seth) attempts to (sexually) seduce Horus in order to put his semen into Horus, but Horus tricks Set (Seth) and Horus has him eat lettuce with Horus` semen on it, earning Horus the favor of the Ennead (court of the gods).

Not exactly similar there either.

Horus also didn`t die in Egyptian mythology, at all, ever. However some people mistakenly use Osiris` resurrection.

Also, the same people use the same resurrection to state that Horus raised the dead, They even mention lazarus. the hebrew form of the name is Elʿāzār "God (has) helped".

Also adult Horus stories have him fighting with seth, not miraculously curing others.
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Male 25,417
He wouldnt let this get on IAB
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Male 382
And not "like" in the same sense as you either... :)
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Male 382
Like an educated man, not lie...
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Male 382
Gerry, I Lie an educated man as much as the next guy, but don`t repeat someone else`s spin.

Horus was born to the goddess Isis after she retrieved all the dismembered body parts of her murdered husband Osiris, except his penis which was thrown into the Nile and eaten by a catfish,and used her magic powers to resurrect Osiris and fashion a gold phallus to conceive her son. (Nothing Like Jesus` conception or birth)

Baptized? The only time this account and location (Eridanus) has ever been named has been in Gerald Massey`s book Ancient Egypt: Light of the World, a book published in 1907 that has no actual translations or specifications for where Massey came up with these names or events. In the 100 years since this book was written no corroborating evidence has been found, and in fact the only `Eridanus` river that can be found is within Greek mythology (Eridanos river), not Egyptian. A few fringe authors continue to cite Massey.
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Male 10,855
[quote]Why did nothing happen for millions of images for over a thousand years, but for those 13 it did?[/quote]

Think you could answer THAT question for us?
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Male 437
"No one even knows that it was a non-Christian that published this JOKE."

I was actually referring to the general mindset of atheist liberals. I never said the person who drew this was non-Christian, although I`d be willing to put money on it.

"I think you mean a rightist viewpoint, not leftist."

I said a leftists agenda, meaning that the liberal narrative is that conservative Christians "own" the traits shown.

"Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."

That does not in any way mean that having wealth is inherently evil.
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Male 359
Every time you libs use "teabagger" to try to be funny and/or degrade the Tea Party you just sound like trolls.

I am a long way from the Right side of the isle but you guy are just crybabies and slugs.

Its the sneering crabby tude that lost you your ass last Nov. Such a turn off.
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Male 10,855
"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

-Mahatma Gandhi

Regardless I`d DEFINITELY prefer a practical Christian over a stupid one.
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Female 584
I love this picture because it`s true. Even the run for president part. Jesus is a humble man that only taught loving thy neighbor and following the word of God. He tells Christians and everyone that you should dislike the sin not the sinner and treat others the way you want to be treated. If more people would follow those two principles (Christian or not) the world would be a much better and easier place to live in.
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Male 977
Retarded Bear... don`t be so retarded.

No one even knows that it was a non-Christian that published this JOKE.

Problem with the church = insecure defensive.
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Female 1,803
All of the actions in the cartoon are either outright crimes, or political attacks with a clear leftist agenda. Join a militia, own a weapon, run a network, run for president, side with the rich? Jesus, as far as we know, did not preach against any of those things.
-----
I think you mean a rightist viewpoint, not leftist. The cartoon isn`t a commentary on christians as much as a commentary on the teabaggers and Westborough church people who claim to be Christians but obviously don`t represent real Christian principles.
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Male 516
RETARDEDBEAR:

Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.
-Matthew 19:24
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Male 39,573
[quote]"Jesus did exist. He`s not like the Loch Ness Monster, silly" [/quote]

Let`s make sure I have the story right...

Heis the son of a god and born to a virgin mother.
He was baptized in a river by `the Baptizer`... who was later beheaded.
He was tempted while alone in the desert.
Healed the sick and the blind.
Cast out demons.
Walked on water.
He raised Asar from the dead. {`Asar` translates to `Lazarus`. }
Oh yeah, he also had 12 disciples.
Then crucified first and after 3 days, two women announced the savior of humanity had been resurrected.

Did I get all that right?
Well, it`s not Jesus. It`s the story of HORUS the egyption god, son of Ra.
And it was written in the Book of The Dead over a
thousand years before Jesus was supposed to be around.

Sounds like early christians stole a few ideas.

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Male 794
im tired of this religious BS, who cares, you believe one thing i believe another, u drink coffee i drink tea, you sleep on your stomach i sleep on my side, we are different, just deal with it and let others do what they want, stop forcing people to be what you want them to be, and HORUS IS MY JESUS
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Male 359
And RETARDEDBEAR is right.
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Male 359
I drudge up some more references but the 1000 character limit is grossly inaccurate and its early in the morning and I need coffee. It seems highly unlikely that EVERY reference was falsified by crafty monks back in the days of yor. But if you are that unsettled by the prospect of his very existence, then just take it on faith that he was never here. ;)
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Male 437
Interesting that the same people who do not believe the story of Jesus also feel they have the right to ascribe all of these traits to him. The cartoon also gives the impression that these actions are somehow things that Christians, as a whole, support.

All of the actions in the cartoon are either outright crimes, or political attacks with a clear leftist agenda. Join a militia, own a weapon, run a network, run for president, side with the rich? Jesus, as far as we know, did not preach against any of those things.
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Male 359
Musuko42- The character of Santa Claus was a real person. No magic flying deer or such but based on a real guy.

LegerDemain you dont need to believe that Lincoln was "Honest Abe" to accept that he existed regardless of what it is "usually along the lines of."

Wundt, Didnt Pliny the Younger, and other historians write of him?

Lives of the Caesars - Claudius, sec. 25: "He banished from Rome all Jews, who were continually making disturbances at the instigation of one Chrestus."

For some reason I also keep thinking of Mithra or Apollonius of Tyana.

Tacitus, a Roman who wrote that the Christians were responsible for "fire that destroyed Rome" in 64 AD. He believed that Christ had died under "extreme execution" during the reign of Pontius Pilatus. He said that Christ`s death briefly checked a "most mischievous" superstition, which arose, not only in Judea, but also in Rome.
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Male 312
If Jesus were alive today I think he`d be pretty awesome.
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Female 535
Why would I care what Jesus would do? Someone who has been dead for 2000 years has no influence on me, and it has always been obvious to me that he has had no influence on his "followers" since Christianity died way back when Rome used it as a catchy marketing device for their invading armies. Very Pope-like, but not very Jesus-like.
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Male 409
Musuko24 is incorrect. There are NO contemporary references to Jesus, including the Bible. No references by Romans (who kept detailed records) or by Jews (Josephus was written later and has questionable veracity). All of the accounts of Jesus, including the Biblical accounts, were written 50 or more years after his death, often by people who were not witnesses to the claimed events. What is more, the stories of his actions change to become more `miraculous` the later the account was written, suggesting prodigious embellishment in the retelling.

That aside, I agree with the sentiment of the cartoon above. Church leaders cannot claim Jesus is the voice of peace and tolerance while they preach hatred and ignorance.
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Male 2,862
Wait - running a network is a sin? I`ll have to give up my IT job immediately!
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Male 373
"There are countless references to Santa Claus too."

Yes, but most of us can distinguish between historical documents and children`s books.
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Male 124
Good, if slightly sarcastic, point by Musuko.

@shr0dinger
"Believing in jesus" is usually along the lines of him being the son of god or not. Whether there was actually a virtuous man in israel at the time or not isn`t related to the question of him being the son of god.
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Male 2,850
"Maybe you believe in God and maybe you dont. But not believing in Jesus is like not believing in Mohamed or Abraham Lincoln or Galileo. There are far too many references to him outside of the bible to just say "I aint never seen him so he dont existed"

There are countless references to Santa Claus too.
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Male 3
I don`t do any of these...Does that means....holy crap I am Jesus.....

Oh wait.. i do beat homosexuals some times ..only when I am drunk tho` ...does that count???
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Male 359
"If you believe that Jesus exists, of course."

If you do? Really?

Maybe you believe in God and maybe you dont. But not believing in Jesus is like not believing in Mohamed or Abraham Lincoln or Galileo. There are far too many references to him outside of the bible to just say "I aint never seen him so he dont existed."

Someone has been watching too much zeitgeist.
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Female 412
To me I think the picture is saying that extremist Christians need to calm themselves down and, to (mis)quote the bible "Take the log out of their own eye before they attempt to take the twig out of others`"
I think we Christians as a whole also need to stop bickering amongst ourselves about all the little things we disagree on and just accept we all believe more or less the same main principles. And for any religion extremism won`t get you anywhere.
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Male 985
@Davymid
I like that quote :)
Never heard it before :D
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Male 4,546
Also, saying as the topic is brought up:

In Islam Jesus and Mohammed share the title of Prophets, just like Moses and whatnot. All rules that apply to one (like drawing, etc) apply to both equally.

There are lots of depictions of Mohammed from Iran to the Supreme court in Washington DC. There are many more of Jesus/Moses/etc.

You`d think some people might get an inkling somewhere in the back of their minds that maybe they don`t fully understand the situation if they`re still talking about "kill you for reproducing his image".

Did you ever spare a single thought for "Why did nothing happen for millions of images for over a thousand years, but for those 13 it did?"

It is like claiming the Afghan war was over property damage/vandalism. Convenient for a smear job, but devoid of facts.
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Male 4,546
"As well as proportionally to their income"

Define proportionally.

It is certainly not proportional to their disposable income.

You`re counting in your statistics, everyone who operates at a loss, everyone who barely makes ends meet, and taking their $15K per year, and saying that someone making 45K gives more than triple to charity.

No poo.

You`re saying he gets 3x the amount, and pays more than 3x to charity.

However if you compare what they have left over after heating, food, water, shelter etc, you then end up comparing 0K to 30K.

You want a good measure? Compare ratios of superflous spending to charity between the rich and poor.

P.S. You`re also wrong incidentally. The poor give the most. The rich come in second. The middle comes in third.
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Male 3,076
@Angilion yes I know that Muhammed was also a prophet I was just saying to SilverThread that they don`t get angry because we draw Jesus they get angry because we draw Muhammed... And I was talking about extremist that don`t want westerners to draw they`re prophets.
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Male 12,138
I`m quite familiar with the teachings of Jesus as laid out in the Bible - as a teenager, I was a Born-Again Christian, bible camps, Christian festivals, the works. And Jesus always struck me as the original left-wing hippie socialist. Ironic then that his most fervent followers today (in America at least) are generally far-right wing conservatives.

I know it`s a hackneyed quotation, but it`s worth repeating here: "I like your Christ. I dislike your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ" - Mohandas Ghandi.
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Male 12,365
[quote]@SilverThread Jesus was just a prophet and they kill for showing images of Muhammed not Jesus... so not very relevant to this post[/quote]

In Islam, Mohammed was also "just" a prophet.

Although "just a prophet" is a very inaccurate way of putting it in the context of a faith that the prophets were the greatest of holy people bearing a message from the one god of all things to humanity. That`s not a "just" thing.

Also, images of any person are not explicitly forbidden in Islam. There are quite a few images of Mohammed by Islamic artists in various places and times.

The underlying issue is idolatory - worshipping an image. It`s forbidden in each of the Abrahamic religions and has been interpreted to varying extents at varying times in each of them, from no restrictions to forbidding all depictions of all living things apart from plants.
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Male 74
@I-IS-BORED
Jesus is not anti-internet, it is just that in this tough job market a guy with long hair and open toed sandals is not gonna get the job. There is no way he would ever become a network administrator.
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Male 210
@Oldfrt: Jesus` thoughts on rich people:
"it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."
http://bible.cc/matthew/19-24.htm
http://bible.cc/mark/10-25.htm
http://bible.cc/luke/18-25.htm

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Male 1
@oldfrt Perhaps you should read your bible. Matthew 19:24... Jesus says "it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."
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Male 12,365
Gah, cut off.

...wrong to consider it proven that he existed.
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Male 12,365
[quote]Jesus did exist. He`s not like the Loch Ness Monster, silly.[/quote]

Weirdly, there is more direct evidence for the Loch Ness monster and much of the same indirect evidence for it as there is for Jesus (who couldn`t possibly have been called by an English corruption of the Greek name, but anyway).

The only thing that can be proved is that some people at least as far back as the mid 1st century believed that Jesus had existed shortly before.

Some people believe the Loch Ness monster exists, so that`s comparable in terms of indirect evidence.

There are some eyewitness accounts of the Loch Ness monster and some photos that are of something that might be it. So there is some direct evidence.

So in terms of evidence of existence, the Loch Ness monster beats Jesus.

The creation of Christianity isn`t evidence of Jesus existing - it`s evidence that some people believed he existed.

I`d say he probably existed, but it`s wrong
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Male 3,076
@SilverThread Jesus was just a prophet and they kill for showing images of Muhammed not Jesus... so not very relevant to this post
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Male 749
Written by a commie leftist! Jesus wouldn`t side with the rich? Bull pucky! Jesus was against people who did bad things. Being rich isn`t bad. In fact, the rich give more to charity, both in total amount as well as proportionally to their income, than any other group. Class envy is an old political trick. I`m amazed people still fall for it. (and for the record, I`m no where near rich).
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Male 15,832
He may not have owned a weapon, but He told His followers, "But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don`t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one."
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Male 2,419
run a network? since when is jesus anti-internet?
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Male 881
Forgot the most important one, Jesus would not be a Christian.
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Male 3,431
He also wouldn`t send his followers to kill you for reproducing his image.
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Male 585
I read the bible in jail and jesus is totaly conceited. Hes not as cool as you think. He may help you out or he may tell you thats what you get, either way its only after you tell him hes the greatest and only lord to exist.
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Male 411
@Gerry1of1 - Thank you sooooooo much for that link! hours and hours of fun!!
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Male 313
Jesus died for our sins, so if we don`t sin that means he died for nothing.
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Female 1,356
this is bull, jesus would totally run for president!
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Male 256
This is some good preachin. I hope to grow to be more and more like Jesus I love him I really do
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Male 39,573

Why don`t you guys chill.

Here`s a fun way to relax - Dress-Up Jesus
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Male 1,815
"Jesus Didn`t Tap"
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Male 15,510
He wouldnt approve the foundation of a religion and churches that use his name
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Male 391
WBC = Scum, let a great quake claim them all, for our sanity.
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Male 221
Jesus did exist, but from my pov he was just a dude with good pr
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Male 656
@ AngryYouth and SaraofBorg:
Christians don`t worship the cross. The cross is a symbol of ultimate sacrifice. Jesus didn`t get killed on the cross, jesus LET himself be crucified. Wearing the cross is just a symbol to remind us of what happened all those thousands of years ago.

Just explaining! So don`t %^&*ing bite my head off.
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Male 736
this was so very ftw it`s made my day.
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Male 734
@SarahofBorg I agree, why would someone worship the intrument of death that killed their savior. But, seeing as how burning a cross is considered a hate crime, I hope he wouldn`t. Jesus was a Jew who openly associated with gentiles, so I doubt he would be a racist and a cross burner.
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Female 3,562
But regardless of my belief, I agree with the sentiment of the cartoon. Jesus was as peaceful, nonviolent, and forgiving as it got. I don`t understand why he apparently hates everyone for not worshiping him correctly and how they deserve his hatred.
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Female 3,562
I don`t know if Jesus existed. I don`t even know George Washington existed. If I pray to Washington, will he answer my prayers and tell me himself that he existed so I can believe?
We`re talking about a random guy who lived 2000 years ago and started a small cult that eventually became popular. He was hardly well documented.
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Male 167
so, how do magnets work?
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Female 3,562
"Burn a cross"
Why not? It`s a cross that killed him. I really don`t get why the weapon used to murder their savior is worshiped by christians. Makes no sense at all.
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Male 204
Some folks are arguing passionately that it`s an absolute fact that Jesus existed. However, there is no concrete of the existence of a carpenter from Nazareth named Jesus. The only documentation of his existence exists in myth and legend. It`s possible that he existed, but it`s also possible that he did not. History is also subjective; not everything we believe actually happened - documented or no - has actually happened.
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Male 848
Prove he existed, GasMaskKid.
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Male 1,610
Gorgack - not at all
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Male 2,056
denying jesus` existence would be denying history itself. the only thing that`s fallible is his coming back to life
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Male 4,680
@Brassbull- Perfect. I`m using that picture if you don`t mind.
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Male 694
"If you believe that Jesus exists, of course."

Jesus did exist. He`s not like the Loch Ness Monster, silly. He just wasn`t magic... I didn`t think anyone was actually dumb enough to believe he never existed.
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Female 491
Burnnnnnn
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Male 163
WESTBORO lol
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Male 199
It`s official, all rich people are bad.
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Male 1,610

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Male 1,256
Boom!
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Male 3,915
hold on to ya butts

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Male 2,034
Haters gonna hate.
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Male 5,314
how do you know he wouldn`t
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Male 108
Amen
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Male 1,116
FLAME ON!
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Male 20,827
Link: What Would Jesus NOT Do? [Pic] [Rate Link] - If you believe that Jesus exists, of course.
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