More Differences Between The US & The UK [Pic]

Submitted by: SaintPatty 6 years ago in

We all know biscuit/cookie and diaper/nappy, but are all of these legit? We need answers, I-A-B UK.
There are 170 comments:
Male 6
Ok i am English, have lived in England all my life and i can say i have never heard anyone use the "face=slappyham" "popcicle=cold on a cob" we also say pen too and gun. I assume that you mean English not British, Scottish, Welsh and irish people are also British and speak very differently to English people. ;)
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Male 4,004
UK, US... who cares...

Go Canada. We bought a Tim Horton`s with us to KAF....what have you done?
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Male 247
I`m calling BS on "Face = Slappy Ham". But the rest are spot on! Especially the "Whimsy Flims Marks and Scribblers".
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Male 1
Why are the comment strings always like this? Guys/Girls, England is like the USA`s mom, we wouldn`t be here without them, and I think they`ve probably appreciated our help a time or two as well. We need to work together and help each other out instead of picking at each other`s faults on internet articles that are supposed to be funny.
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Female 14
AustinJay, your argument might be somewhat more convincing if you could prove yourself to have a basic grasp of English grammatical rules and punctuation.
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Male 2,220
There`s another one "faggots".



Offaly good of you to point that out AJ, old fellow.
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Male 52
You uk faggots cry a lot..lets see..how many this is why your fat america posts there are? Yeah...oh well dont go crying no one gives a poo
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Female 277
It`s called the ENGLISH language for a reason, don`t butcher it and then tell us we`re wrong.
Also, America you`re not the shining beacon for the rest of the world like you think. You`re more of the bratty little cousin that everyone humours.
Also, what is up with your `football` all that padding and helmets grow a pair!
Trolling over, that was fun.
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Male 12,365
[quote]Do they really call them wishy washies? That`s so cute if they do. Lol[/quote]

No, we don`t really call them that. We call them windscreen wipers. This list has some real UK terms and some made up for a laugh.

"wishy-washy" is sometimes used in the UK, but it refers to something insipid, weak and ineffective, a failure to stand for anything, dithering about.
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Male 12,365
[quote]Wow Gsmith. Seem to have decided to ignore hundreds of years of your own history there.[/quote]

Wrong.

You are making the entirely unreasonable assumption that Gsmith was posting the same nationalist prejudice that they was responding too but with the countries reversed, which they clearly weren`t doing.

Or are you also a nationalistic bigot and thus so enraged at anyone pointing out the fact that the USA is not absolutely perfect in every respect and the divine almighty guardian of everywhere and everything good that you can`t think straight?
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Male 12,365
It`s a shame that an amusing bit of fun prompted nationalist bigots to spew their prejudices into the comments.
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Male 2,619
UK Troll, Troll, Troll, Troll.
USA - Nu huh
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Male 759
What a load of rubbish. Who made this translation up?
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Male 2,220
Not sure how Cuba and the Falklands/Malvinas compares.. Don`t remember the UK arming a group of Falkland exiles, then telling them to retake the place, we`re right behind you.

Kick our ass. Hee-haw!
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Male 2
PPS: Lucky is an non-nice individual too.
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Male 2
Wow Gsmith. Seem to have decided to ignore hundreds of years of your own history there. And in case you forgot, the UK got right behind old GW from the get go. Now, how would you like to proceed? As a ball less wanker who follows, or some amighty moral highhorse, which the UK clearly is not. Cuba seriously? Do we need to go back to the Falklands, or do you realize the irony or hypocrisy of your statements? Seeing that you are morally elite, I am sure you do. PS. That little retreat at Dunkirk WAS good enough proof of your ability to "handle Hitler" alone. The US was just bored. Plus you better be DAMN careful spouting out about highly questionable ethics, lest we start reviewing pages of UK history. DO us all a favor and shut it.
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Male 2
@Lucky2u
A few points,
1) Your second comment is wrong in the context you are using the insult, it should read:-
UK - We totally could have taken Hitler alone
USA - Denial
2) The war of 1812 only had one clear loser and that was the native Americans, so your comment that you kicked our arses is a subjective point of view.
3) It`s spelt arse not ass, you didn`t kick our Donkey now did you?
4) The USA really isn`t the shining example of hope and freedom that you might idolise it to be, in so much as for nye on 20 years you have waged an embargo against Cuba, internationally recognised as being illegal. With the worlds greatest incarceration rate and highly questionable ethics when it comes to "homeland security", as long as the US citizens interests are approximated in your actions; you really have no remorse as to who suffers as a consequence. So you had probably best reword your final statement as I do not believe the term "free world"
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Female 374
Do they really call them wishy washies? That`s so cute if they do. Lol
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Male 315
@IRockYeah here are some more for you

USA - Teeth
UK - jagged yellow mini growths in the mouth

USA - You`re right you totally could have taken Hitler on your own
UK - Denial

USA - kicked your ass with farmers in a revolution
UK - *ignoring those years in history*

USA - and then did it again in 1812
UK - *ignoring those years too*

USA - leader of the free world
UK - can deny it all day every day, the USA still owns them
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Male 18
Well, what can I say. Im just going to pop outside and take a drag from my fag. Im sure that can not be taken the wrong way in The USA can it??
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Female 56
im british ... i call my face...my face! ... :O shocking ...
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Male 2,619
Oh, some more....

USA - Friendly fire
UK - Killing allies

USA - Collateral damage
UK - Civilain deaths

USA - We saved your asses in WW2
UK - No you didnt
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Female 673
lawl. The American version of slappy ham would be masturbation.
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Male 95
"Brits = bad teeth and lousy food."

Free dental care on the National Health Service or on Health Insurance.
Some of the best chefs in the world work and own restaurants in London...

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Male 95
lol family-guy-esque stereotyping of the English...
FYI windscreen wipers and lollies are the British versions.

We don`t really have blueberry pancakes here though...


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Female 250
in the blackcountry (a region in central England) face=mush,
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Male 407
Wishy washy
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Female 2,120
Rooty-tooty point and shooty sounds delightfully fancy.
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Female 1,743
Aww, cute, some of the Brits are offended.


Don`t worry, they`ll go back to hating on the USA tomorrow so you can continue your ultra hip anti-American attitudes then. :P
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Male 2,703
"There are areas in the US where they call shopping carts "trolleys". Mostly in the South I think."

actually, in the south they`re typically called `buggies`
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Male 12,365
[quote]On a side note, what do you call biscuits, if you call cookies biscuits?[/quote]

An unsweetened scone is very similar to a USA biscuit. Not a sweetened scone - those are usually made roughly circular, cut in half and served cold with jam and cream as a form of cake. Unsweetened scones are savouries, like USA biscuits, and usually served hot cooked on top of a thick stew. If you look for images of "beef cobbler", you`ll see what I mean.
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Male 12,365
[quote]WTF is a clammy roger? Sounds like a sordid sexual encounter in a sauna[/quote]

I`m thinking that it`s a play on Jammy Dodger.

In case you don`t get those in the USA, it`s a brand name of a type of biscuit (cookie to you) that`s well known here.
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Male 12,365
[quote]..I`ve never heard cold on a cob.

I always thought it was "ice lolly."[/quote]

It is. This picture is a joke. Some of the English is correct (e.g. the thing for pushing your shopping around is a called a trolley here), but some are just made up for a laugh.
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Male 12,365
Absolutely correct. Why, only yesterday I had a most unpleasant altercation with a young ruffian who attached a cold on a cob and some clammy rogers to the wishy-washies on my Jag. The odourous villein was most disparaging about my attire and insistent on a bout of fisticuffs, so I took out my rooty tooty point and shooty to discourage him.
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Male 126
Rooty-Tooty Point and Shooty made me lol. I could see it, a gang of "british" people.

"alright men! Pull out your Rooty Tooty Point and Shooties, and we`ll teach these trencherans what-for!"
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Female 182
6 of these are wtf lol
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Male 22
This is brilliant. I`m forever telling people how I love to stuff my slappy ham with clammy rogers.

SCfan, let`s not get into crass lazy stereotyping, I know it`s hard for you fat ignorant Yanks to avoid... ;)
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Female 265
Nigel Thornberry read that in my head. : D
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Female 3
yeah i know its a joke but i just get annoyed whenever i tell anyone whos from america im from the uk they allways ask me to do stupid accents, sorry i didnt mean to sound so angry
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Male 36
SCfan, in that case, all americans are fat, god praising roostery little pooes.

Get my drift?
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Male 540
This entire thing entered my head in an Australian accent.
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Female 192
..I`ve never heard cold on a cob.

I always thought it was "ice lolly."
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Male 694
I was annoyed by vimo`s post for a second, then I saw that she`s only made this post. It`s a joke, honey.
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Female 3
well this is complete bull except 5 of them, not everyone in the uk has the cliche `british` accent in fact barely anyone does, and no-one ever or has ever yses words like `rooty tooty point and shooty` wtf america how closed minded are you?
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Male 2,085
Brits = bad teeth and lousy food.
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Male 2,528
The "Queen`s English" annoys me sometimes. Its like you`ve gone out of your way to give stuff crappy names just so that Americans have to come up with less crappy names for them.
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Male 219
American English annoys me sometimes. Its like you`ve gone out of your way to come up with a different crappier word for something there was already a word for...


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Male 2,121
American English annoys me sometimes. Its like you`ve gone out of your way to come up with a different crappier word for something there was already a word for...
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Female 587
i no longer say "gun"
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Male 371
Yay troll!
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Male 129
i just cant stop looking at the slappy ham! she`s so pretty!
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Male 4,793
I like how all the Europeans are getting insanely defensive here. Successful troll is successful.
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Female 159
It`s a P take AsdaPrice. Calm down. No one would belive that.

I like how it`s mixed in with real ones though to add to the authenticity
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Female 839
as an english person, the only thing i can say is WTF?
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Male 147
it sounds like the homo way to say all of the american things
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Male 65
Ahahaha this is awesome.
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Male 589
Bully!
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Male 79
IF you think us Brits speak like that then you`re as retarded as we portray you Americans to be.

Nuff said.
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Male 2,868
I`m and American and I`ve ALWAYS used "rooty-tooty point and shooty." Doesn`t everyone?
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Male 235
this is hilarious we always say those things here like constantly!! jackasses
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Male 506
Ummmmmm...no?
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Female 58
i thought that car park should be on there. To me thats like envisioning a bunch of cars with playground equiptment...not a regular parking lot. :)
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Female 55
People don`t seriously think we talk like that do they?
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Male 21
i wish we did speak like this, might start using slappy ham on the regular.
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Female 277
Sorry, `we all know biscuit/cookie`? We have things called biscuits AND things called cookies. They are two different things. It should be biscuit/scone thing.
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Male 5,194
If you go to a British Ihop and order a "rooty tooty point and shooty" they will put strawberries on your clammy rogers.
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Male 730
Hahahahahaa that was awesome:D
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Male 720
The last one made me lol
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Female 60
I "har-ed" at slappy ham.
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Male 12,138
[quote]10 internets for anyone who can translate Wanger Sanger.[/quote]
I`ll have a stab. The direct translation would be "dick sandwich", so I`m gonna guess it`s either a hot dog or a spit-roast.
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Male 221
Cookie/Biscuit and 1 or 2 others yeah. The rest... there`s no hope for humanity.
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Female 8,001
Yeah right-oh.Does bollocks come through the filter?
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Female 2,027
wishy washy? yeah if ur 4, wtf
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Male 628
"British skeet shooting: throw a clammy roger and hit it with a rooty tooty point and shooty."

you see, British grammar doesn`t work like that. Combining terms in this way usually results in the name of a sexual position.
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Male 72
WTF? 1st four + chips + cripss yeah, but the rest...a 4 year old could give a better description!
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Male 447
I`m pretty sure this was meant as a joke. You know, playing off the idea American`s have of quaint British slang. I started getting suspicious at wishy-washy but then it was obviously a joke at the last few.
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Female 61
I`m never calling it a gun again.
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Male 4
do americans seriously believe we use most of these terms? like `rooty tooty point and shooty` really?
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Male 39,614
[quote]"some americans it seems they think we genuinely use these crazy terms" [/quote]
You don`t? Ever been in barney? "Yeah, that`s what I thought," he said smugly.

For you american types `barney` means `in trouble`.
Barney Rubble = Trouble.... get it.
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Male 247
popsicle = lolly
cookies = round biscuits
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Male 5,194
British skeet shooting: throw a clammy roger and hit it with a rooty tooty point and shooty.
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Male 677
The first 4 are correct, and the Chips and crisps ones are too, but the rest, ive never heard. theyre probly some misinformed person`s idea of roosterney rhyming slang.
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Female 1,427
I think using the term "Rooty tooty point and shooty" would actually get you shot.
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Male 15
The last 4 are bollocks but the rest are true enough
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Male 101
@frylock we`re taking it as a joke, but by the comments being left by some americans it seems they think we genuinely use these crazy terms - they`re asking and we`re answering is all
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Male 587
You know, I really read the title of the link, I just saw a thumbnail of a pretty girl and had to click the link.
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Female 709
Most of this is stupid, but I will now make it official in the UK.
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Female 9,560
Rooty Tooty point and shooty, I think I just found my new favorite word. XD
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Male 26
Rooty Tooty point and Shooty is the funniest thing I`ve ever heard.
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Male 1,021
@Gerry1of1

right on
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Male 6,694
Now I want pancakes.
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Male 182
I may start using the term "slappy ham" now. This list is largely bullpoo, but it`d make things far more interesting. :)
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Male 4
this is some BS right here
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Male 39,614
JoeYC - [quote]"half of this is wrong. drating americans." [/quote]

How do you know Americans wrote it? Coulda been anybody.

But, europe never misses a chance to bash the U.S. I shouldn`t spoil your fun.
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Male 721
wtf, half of this is wrong. drating americans.
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Male 55
Biscuit, trolley, nappy, torch, chips and crisps are correct. All the others are surely someone having a laugh (I lived in the UK until I was 23)
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Male 1,793
I never call it a cart, I call it a thing holder...
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Male 89
Jam a scone up your dirtbox
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Female 833
erm. no.
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Female 158
Oh these are so inaccurate. Wikipedia has a better article on the differences.
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Male 270
Fight the English to free England from the English
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Male 2,619
"drat the English."

Ok, use your own frigging language then you haemorrhoid
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Male 586
ROOTY TOOTY POINT AND SHOOTY! HAHA i actually lol`d
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Male 14
drat the English.
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Male 835
My god, I`ll be saying rootytootypintandshooty all friggin day now.
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Female 1
This started making sense then just kept getting more comical! Here`s a few more:

Bum - Hobo
Fanny - Bum
Soda - Coke
Cup o`Joe - Coffee
Health insurance - NHS ...
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Male 312
Rooty-tooty point and shooty is now my favourite thing to say.
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Male 25,417
lolz at the last one
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Male 78
@Klaxor: Continent... lol.
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Male 191
Slappy ham? Do people really say that? Or is that more colloquial and people also say face?
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Male 78
British. Loled. Whimsy Flims, adopted to vocabulary.
Also, British people do talk total jibberish most of the time.
10 internets for anyone who can translate Wanger Sanger.
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Male 2,619
"@IRockYeah: Bold talk from a man whose continent once enslaved half of the world"

Yeah, but we called it what it was....Conquering. No sugar coating it there sweetcheeks
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Male 646
@IRockYeah: Bold talk from a man whose continent once enslaved half of the world
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Male 2,220
Thank you for RTP&S, which I`m taking onboard (who says English is a dying language) albeit not perhaps in the way intended, and thank you for an excuse to post Ms Klum at her finest.
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Male 116
lol, never heard such bollocks in my life, besides, you need to remember who`s language it is ;-)
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Male 2,390
slappy ham?
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Male 2,619
USA: Sidewalk
UK: Pavement

USA: Liberate
Rest of World: Invade
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Female 412
@number696969: Brilliant!! XD
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Male 3,327
We could add line/queue, truck/lorry (lorrie?), stroller/tram, trash/rubbish, bathroom/lou (loo?). The list goes on.

My grandfather, London born and bred, used to have a few great sayings that I consider English, but might not be. My favorite: Why do you have ears? So you can see. Without ears, your hat would fall down over your eyes.
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Male 110
ROFL!

rooty-tooty point and shooty - brilliant!

Needless to say, this was a joke
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Male 605
Ha! I`m definitely using slappy ham from now on
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Male 5
Hahaha, why are Americans telling US to stop getting offended.
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Male 259
Cookie = Chef
Cart = Bit you bolt behind a horse
Diaper = Kinky Adult Niche Market Toy
Flashlight = Blunt Weapon
Windshield Wipers = Makeshift Whip or Sword
Face = The bit you don`t see doing it doggie
Fries = Chinese Flies
Chips = Gay 80s TV Cop Series with Ponch and John
Blueberry Pancakes = Probably slang for dogging
Pen = Mightier than the windshield wiper
Popsicle = Freezer sex
Gun = We don`t have these. What do they do?
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Female 309
Coming from the UK, this made me lol.

and a popsicle isn`t a lollipop kpatient, it`s an ice lolly!
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Male 670
For Scottish people:
Face = Puss
Fries = Lunch
Chips = Dinner
Blueberry Pancakes = Posh nosh
Pen = Shiv
Popsicle = Zoom

lol
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Male 169
I`m English and that was hilarious, slappy ham made me rofl.
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Female 45
Lol, lighten up people. Most of these obviously aren`t serious. Damn Brits getting all offensive.
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Male 2,121
Some people don`t have a sense of humour. Most of these were jokes.
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Male 660
"Slappy Ham"? , "wishy washies"????
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Female 403
This is so crap. If I ever use the term "wishy-washies" please pull out a `rooty-tooty point and shooty` and kill me...
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Female 39
I am so using the term whimsy flims now. Like, no one will know what I mean. But it sounds so much better than pen.
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Male 4
windsshield wipers = winsscreen wipers
face = face
blueberry pancakes = blueberry pancakes (except never seen any in uk)
pen = pen
popsicle = lollipop
gun = gun
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Male 4
British isn`t a language... It`s English. And half of these... WTF? Slappy Ham for face... That`s not even roosterney slang - Boat Race is though btw :P
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Male 1,744
translation for pen, loled
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Male 1,067
This is literally so unfunny :P
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Male 2,159
@ Avalon - that depends. What do Americans term as biscuits?
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Male 5,194
I`m getting my mark and scribblers and jotting these helpful tips down!

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Male 2,159
It started well, but I`ve never heard of Wishy Washies (windscreen wipers) and the last four should be blueberry pancakes, pen (ballpoints are nicknamed Biros after a popular brand), ice lolly and gun, or pistol.

This list probably isn`t serious, though.
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Male 187
and that wasn`t an angry post or anything, just making a point, and now I want cookies.
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Male 187
Although some of those are obviously incorrect, as an American, I would never have known if someone didn`t correct it. It`s like someone telling you to say Me gusta perros to mean I love cats in spanish (I know that is incorrect) and no one ever corrects you, you sound like a fool. In short, don`t take it offensively when American take this seriously, we just really don`t know. If I see something that says "in Britain we call windshield wipers `wishy washies`" I have nothing other than that to go on, although I will think that is incredibly stupid.

On a side note, what do you call biscuits, if you call cookies biscuits?
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Male 3
i was gonna say that`s exactly right, you know like up your arsehole = elephant and castle?......
:-)
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Female 420
I did like rooty tooty point and shooty. I assume this is a joke and Americans don`t really think we have the vocabulary of a three year old for everyday objects otherwise. They`re windscreen wipers for a start. and people who are not from London don`t use any form of rhymig slang, its not a generic British thing. In fact most people from London probably don`t.
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Female 857
Cock!

ha ha so funny!! Right then... Mockney Co ckney!
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Female 857
For all you mockney roosterneys out there
Pistol = Lady from Bristol, Pen = Layin Hen, Face = Ricky Gervais, Windscreen wiper = Billie Piper...
In English gun=Pistol, Pen=Biro, Popsicle=Lolly

Example of a mockney = Christian Bale.
I`ll stop now.
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Female 1,435
pfft stupid. we don`t talk like that.
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Male 10,855
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Male 697
cor blimey this old text `ere is spot on!
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Male 588
Its not "wishy-washies", its "parking ticket holders"
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Male 101
*no one says
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Male 101
we don`t use wishy washies, slappy ham, clammy rogers, whimsy flims, cold on the cob or rooty tooty. it`s annoying how the world seems to think we speak in roosterney rhyming slang. no one seems guvnor either.
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Male 10,855
@MrYouKnow

Ah the irony that is your screenname.

Wait what did you think it was...
...a "napkin"?
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Female 627
rooty tooty point and shooty
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Male 1,081
I actually didn`t know nappy is a diaper.
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Male 405
That took me longer than it should have to realise it was a joke, oh dear ><
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Male 10,855


Because Simon Cowel is NOT amused!



Niether is Patrick Stewart...



...nor for that matter Tommy Lee Jones.

Because ultimately:


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Male 222
I like how in New Zealand we use a mix between the two.
Like chips/crisps = Chips
and fries/chips= Chips
:)
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Male 50
One of my favourite americanism is the use of the word fanny which does not mean anything like backside in the UK, think more frontside.

It leads to excellent exclamations like "My fanny is red raw!"

Of course the Americanism for bum is a homeless guy, where as in the UK it`s your backside. Though homeless people are a pain in the arse so maybe that`s where it came from
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Male 1,195
There are areas in the US where they call shopping carts "trolleys". Mostly in the South I think.
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Male 12,138
MattPrince, Jesus wept, is she trying to take down some orbital satellites? Cause if so, those guns are pointing in the right direction.
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Male 2,988
lol
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Male 2,220



`Rooty tooty point and shooties`
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Male 12,138
It was all going well up to the point of the flashlight/torch comparison. Things started to go a bit south after that (and yes, I realise that`s the point of this post).

Allow me to give some input as a Brit (fellow Brits, please correct me if I`m wrong on any of these):

Cookie:Biscuit
Cart:Trolley
Diaper:Nappy
Flashlight:Torch (from here it deviates)
Windshield Wipers:Windscreen Wipers
Face:Face
Fries:Chips
Chips:Crisps
Blueberry Pancakes:Blueberry Pancakes (WTF is a clammy roger? Sounds like a sordid sexual encounter in a sauna)
Pen:Pen
Popsicle:Ice Lolly
Gun:Gun

In fact, IAB regular TRWolf made a good video of the differences between english english and american english here
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Male 34
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Male 2,220
Fanny Arse
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Female 500
ice lolly? love! I will call `em that from now on! thank youz bardockjerms.
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2,767
rooty-tooty point and shooty? literally lol`ed
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Male 2,703
the lack of smibbly bibbly bothers me
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Male 232
I know that it`s a joke but some of the joke ones do have different names in English. Such as Windshield wiper - Windscreen wiper
popsicle - ice lolly
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Male 2,372
Phone - Dog
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Male 970
Link: More Differences Between The US & The UK [Pic] [Rate Link] - We all know biscuit/cookie and diaper/nappy, but are all of these legit? We need answers, I-A-B UK.
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