The Information Sign You`ll Find In Heaven [Pic]

Submitted by: catbarf 6 years ago in Funny

Great, now God"s angry.
There are 77 comments:
Male 309
"Arguments like this have no substance. Atheism requires NO faith whatsoever. I don`t get why it`s so difficult for theists to understand this? Are you so indoctrinated into believing that a faith-based lifestyle is the norm?"

Right, but all beliefs are based on faith, since certainty is impossible. Athiesm, is not a belief, so what you`re saying is true. But nonetheless, Athiests (like all people) DO have other beliefs, therefore, they act on faith.
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Male 309
"Google the "null-hypothesis". The Wikpedia article is a decent explanation. But in case you can`t be arsed: the null-hypothesis is the assumption that, given a choice between X and not-X, you assume not-X until X is proven, not the other way around."

The most rational position is to live with the uncertainty.
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Male 309
"What I do care about is when people step out of their boundaries and push their belief to others."

Uh, Athiests push their beliefs more than religious people. Almost every religious person I know is pretty quiet about about. It`s the athiests that are always screaming like banshees.
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Male 309
"How about we call it sense? Sense that I will not cut off the fingers of those that don`t believe as I do. Sense that I will not draw and quarter those that do not believe as I do, etc. etc. etc. (lol redundant etc.)"

Good thing religious people don`t do any of that poo. Well, Western religious people don`t, at least.

Cool implication, though. Makes you sound smart.
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Male 309
I don`t generally like all the anti-religion stuff on IAB, but I gotta admit, that was pretty funny.
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Male 116
What it boils down to is that Christianity is faith driven and society wants everything backed up with scientific fact. As for me and my family we have faith in the lord.
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Female 227
But jombre, when it comes down to it, how do you know that God doesn`t exist? The Bible being allegedly "wrong" doesn`t prove that God doesn`t exist. People doing atrocities "in God`s name" doesn`t prove that God doesn`t exist. Nothing proves that God doesn`t exist, and nothing proves that God does exist.
So how do you know?
You "just know", right?
:)
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Male 106
@jpfu220
Isn`t Josephus` account on Jesus considered inaccurate? The sections in his writings about Jesus were written in different writing different vocabulary? There is a big possibility that his writings were altered to give some people credibility.

Plus his credibility as a historian is questionable.

The accounts of a man hundreds of years ago is not proof. Not without sufficient evidence to back up, which I haven`t found any at all.

And if you just want to follow Jesus` teachings, why have the whole shebang that is Christianity? You probably don`t agree with every doctrine it has, so why even follow it? Besides, his teachings are pretty much common sense. If people need him to follow his teachings then everybody who isn`t a Christian is an absolute monster. (Which they aren`t)

Besides, the comic this post is based on is about the god myth.
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Male 5,413
AH ha I love it!
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Male 65
Just want to make something clear:
I AM NOT TRYING TO CONVERT ANYONE! I respect taht everyone has the right to believe whatever they want! haha.
i just feel that there needs to be SOME christian representation in these types of posts :)
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Male 65
@musuko:
Actually, people writing about him IS evidence. For instance, the jewish historian Josephus(a very well known writer of that time) wrote about Jesus and even Jesus` half brother.
The book of acts is FILLED with very accurate historical facts that could not have been written about had the writer not been there (soundings of the coast of a village, the unique dialect they spoke there, the direction of the wind during the seasons at this place). There are many historians out there who write about Jesus during this time.

I will agree that there are bad things that happen in the church. As Christopher Hitchens said (and i know you guys have to know him), "religion poisons everything". I would argue that everything poisons religion. If you look at Jesus`s teachings, what is there to object to? Love your neighbor? Don`t kill? Don`t discriminate? People have value no matter what their position in society etc... what is there to object to there?
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Male 2,850
@LittleMickey

"Atheism takes just as much faith as all other religions do."

How long did it take you to find and copy-paste that tired old phrase?

Google the "null-hypothesis". The Wikpedia article is a decent explanation. But in case you can`t be arsed: the null-hypothesis is the assumption that, given a choice between X and not-X, you assume not-X until X is proven, not the other way around.

Or, more simply, if I show you a sealed box, you assume there is nothing in particular in the box until I open it and reveal the contents, rather than, say, assuming there is a dead badger inside the box.

Because there MIGHT be a dead badger in there...but until I open the box, it would be daft to believe that particular item is in there.

Similarly, we assume no god, until a god is proven.

Assume not-X until X is proven.
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Male 2,850
@jpfu220

"Jesus was a person that walked on this earth."

Evidence, please. And no, people writing about him isn`t evidence. If it were, then Beowulf and Grendel "walked on this earth", as they too were written about.
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Male 106
That`s one thing I really hate. Theists complaining on IAB, adapting a victim position. "Boo hoo, IAB is picking on Christians again! How mean!"

Tell that to all the kids and teenagers in religious families who are afraid to reveal their atheism or homosexuality because they would be disowned. Tell that to people in Africa who get discriminated because of twisted ideals propagated by religious teachings. Tell that to these media talking heads who spread lies and deceit disillusioning their viewers. Tell that to all the countries who have a religious political slant.

Yeah, when a website has stuff that insults religion the entire world has collapsed. Nothing as offensive and destructive has ever been witnessed.
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Male 3,745
"It`s like if there was a kid in grade school who said that the tooth fairy took him on adventures in the weekends and that girls have cooties and the only way to cure it was to do a dance. It would be completely reasonable for the other kids to laugh at him and tell him he`s ridiculous."

it also says that said childs uncle is a helluva liar...
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Male 106
@jpfu220
"But if we only look at the posts mocking a religion then i would say that almost 80% are mocking Christianity. Just an observation."

Maybe if Christianity wasn`t so ridiculous and bring so much trouble with it, comics like these wouldn`t be made and posted on here. Maybe if theists didn`t believe in fairy tales with zero evidence, maybe people on IAB wouldn`t laugh at their stupidity and ignorance.

It`s like if there was a kid in grade school who said that the tooth fairy took him on adventures in the weekends and that girls have cooties and the only way to cure it was to do a dance. It would be completely reasonable for the other kids to laugh at him and tell him he`s ridiculous. Now turn that kid into an adult and place him in society. See where I`m getting at?

IAB is not anti-religious. There is no anti-religion agenda going on in here. IAB just loves to poke fun at stupid stuff theism/theists do, which isn`t really that diffi
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Male 3,745
helluva list you made...you win...
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Male 106
@collegebound
Trust me, I don`t care what people believe in. If you believe that your cat is a god who created everything by farting, it wouldn`t affect me at all.

What I do care about is when people step out of their boundaries and push their belief to others. This is pretty dangerous and stupid. I don`t want an entire country full of people who use that brand of logic and reasoning.

And I can expect the responses for this: not all theists are like this, don`t be judgmental! But really, religion pushes an agenda of ignorance and hatred. I simply cannot ignore this. When religion stops spreading misinformation, bigotry, discrimination, child-abuse, sexism, holy wars, impediment of science, lies, baseless faith, faith healing, minority abuse, controlling peoples sex life, fear, genital mutilation, taking peoples freedoms away, superstitions and uncritical thinking, then MAYBE I`ll be okay with theism.

But in the mean time, no I don`t have any faith.
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Male 3,745
"Atheism takes just as much faith as all other religions do."

wuht?

"Christianity is a complex and beautiful religion. It`s ignorant to make fun and disrespect another`s culture."

RELIGION. its rude to make fun and disrespect another`s RELIGION.

"The joke is on you. Denying God doesn`t make him nonexistent., and making fun of the winning team doesn`t make you any less of a loser!"

that last statement is why nobody likes us Christians...

"Arguments like this have no substance. Atheism requires NO faith whatsoever. I don`t get why it`s so difficult for theists to understand this?"

i dont get why most Theists i talk to dont believe that God can be a miracle worker and can do whatever the drat he wants...but ill leave that alone...tbh i couldn`t careless if others believed or not...but dont tell me that im crazy because i believe and i wont bible bash you...chances are i wont do that any
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Male 106
[Continued]

Just want to make an analogy to prove my point against your faulty logic: Not believing in something is NOT the same as actively believing in something. Atheists don`t not believe in god. They don`t even bother thinking about a concept of belief at all. There wouldn`t be an atheism if there was no religion.

It`s the same reason why I don`t call you a non-flying-spaghetti-monster-ist. We did not create the non-belief, YOU created the belief in the first place. You created the (stupid) choice.

So I wish there is no atheism in the future and I do not mean that everybody is a theist. What I mean is that the title is not even necessary because EVERYONE is an atheist. Once again, there`s no such thing as a non-believer in Goldilocks and the three bears.

So please reconsider what you said, it might save you from an embarrassing situation.
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Male 106
@LittleMickey
That is a pretty ignorant statement. I presume that you follow some sort of religion, probably Christianity, right? Does that mean you take a lot of faith in NOT believing in Allah?

Arguments like this have no substance. Atheism requires NO faith whatsoever. I don`t get why it`s so difficult for theists to understand this? Are you so indoctrinated into believing that a faith-based lifestyle is the norm?
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Male 1,013
[quote]Atheism takes just as much faith as all other religions do.[/quote]

How about we call it sense? Sense that I will not cut off the fingers of those that don`t believe as I do. Sense that I will not draw and quarter those that do not believe as I do, etc. etc. etc. (lol redundant etc.)
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Male 56
I miss Bizarro...
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Male 257
retoast
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Female 227
Atheism takes just as much faith as all other religions do.
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Male 3,076
Ding! Ding! Ding! jombre finds his pliers drags jpfu220`s nail and inserts a steel bolt
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Male 1,610
We wish it was, God. We wish it was.
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Male 106
@jpfu220
Maybe that`s why you`re a christian, you don`t even know Christianity properly. What extra biblical sources? Jesus appearing on a piece of toast?

Even if Jesus existed, what proves he`s the son of god? The bible?

I know a lot of theists who don`t believe or support the dogma that religion has, but I ask you this question: why are you even religious to begin with? Why not just be a good person without the extra strings of religion? Do you really need the security blanket?
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Male 247
jpfu220: Ding! Ding! Ding! You nailed it there. Thank you!
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Male 36
i lol`d
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Male 65
@sumrandom1
Those are some interesting similarities. Jesus was a person that walked on this earth. Many extra-biblical sources prove it. So no, it was not an old pagan religion made into a new one.

I feel like most of the people on here do not have a solid understanding of the faith. Christianity isn`t a religion. It is a relationship.
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Male 541
so I`m pretty sure IAB is turning into quite the anti-Christian website
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Male 2,855
atheism ftw
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Male 58
The joke is on you. Denying God doesn`t make him nonexistent., and making fun of the winning team doesn`t make you any less of a loser!
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Male 2,850
@jpfu220

"But if we only look at the posts mocking a religion then i would say that almost 80% are mocking Christianity."

Because it`s the dominant religion in most of the cultures of the visitors to the site, that`s why.

Should we give equal mockery to Jainism, despite most of us not having the first clue what it is and what it`s about?

We mock the idiocy that surrounds us...and Christianity happens to surround us a lot.
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Male 794
this is the story of HORUS (Egyptian god of the sun)born whos mother was Isis. Isis was impregnated by divine fire. Isis is usually portrayed holding baby Horus in her lap, as is Mary. Jesus considered God and man, Horus considered God in man form. Jesus was killed and resurrected 3 days later, Horus dies is mourned for 1 day buried and rises 2 days later (3 days dead). Sorry to burst everyones bubble but it was pagan beliefs adapted to a new religion to help it spread faster and easier. Both are believed to be based on the cycle of the sun (Horus the GOD of the SUN, Jesus SON of GOD)

Just because you were born into a religion does not mean you should follow it, make up your own mind, explore, read, find out more. Just because you were born poor does not mean you will die that way. that is all, let the hating begin......
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Male 4,793
""Christianity is a complex and beautiful religion. It`s ignorant to make fun and disrespect another`s culture." "


... Crusades. I win.
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Male 65
I am a christian, but i thought this was clever.

@davymid
i have been coming to IAB for a while, but i never had an account. From what i have seen people don`t make fun of everyone on here. I do not see people making fun of Jews, or Muslims. I see people making fun of Christians. In politics it is pretty even. Republicans and Democrats both get some. But if we only look at the posts mocking a religion then i would say that almost 80% are mocking Christianity. Just an observation.
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Male 2,850
@Francakes

"Christianity is a complex and beautiful religion. It`s ignorant to make fun and disrespect another`s culture."

Two words for you: Jack Chick.
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Male 116
And when you are all standing before God to answer for your sins he will show you this page and what will you have to say? And now we wait for the hilarious replies to this post!
See some of you in heaven.
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Male 106
@Francakes

"Christianity is a complex and beautiful religion."

Ooooh, you haven`t been reading your bible, have you?
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Male 559
Jesus has a sense of humor. I think he`d laugh at this.
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Male 1,197
"oh lighten up! it WAS a joke! ...or was it?"

no no, definatly not a joke ...
i hope IAB doesnt go all serious on us now
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Male 25,417
LOLZ
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Male 311
Francakes, for all we know your avatar could be God, and frankly, It`d be just as impressive and un-noteworthy
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Male 3,076
ahh thank you I was searching for that picture all over the interwebz
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Male 12,138
[quote]It`s ignorant to make fun and disrespect another`s culture.[/quote]
Oh, come on Francakes, you`ve been a member of I-A-B for 4 years now. And you`re only now realizing that we make fun of, and disrespect everybody? It`s kind of what we do.
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Female 1,435
oh lighten up! it WAS a joke! ...or was it?
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Male 42
@Francakes boo hoo
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Male 407
sometimes it seems like he exists other timesnaaa
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Female 157
Christianity is a complex and beautiful religion. It`s ignorant to make fun and disrespect another`s culture.
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Female 697
@mogman45 I`m thinking more that science exists in the universe, not just in our minds.
That picture means religion is all in a persons mind. Science certainly is not. It is how we think, but our minds are not the only place science exists; it exists within the world.
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Male 2,591
@YugureKage: Where`s the burn? Looks like he agreed.
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Female 418
is that.... pie ...or am i just hungry?
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Female 1,203
""This is funny because I am not tired of disrespectful lazy jokes about Christianity at all."

Good to hear, because I`m not tired of laughing at Christianity. Everybody wins!"

BURN! Touche CoyoteKing.
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Male 224
science is the same thing actually.
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Female 1,963
SuposedArt, I really don`t see how this is disrespectful. If you wanted to, you could look at it as a joke on atheism.
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Male 1,249
Baby Jesus died for our SIDS
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Male 2,988
"This is funny because I am not tired of disrespectful lazy jokes about Christianity at all."

Good to hear, because I`m not tired of laughing at Christianity. Everybody wins! :-)
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Male 51
Entire religion is babies!
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Female 158
Isn`t this a repost?
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Male 1,081
Jesus died for our wins.
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Female 60
Ahahaha! This is funny because I am not tired of disrespectful lazy jokes about Christianity at all.
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Male 10,440



Shazam!
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Female 1,652
Jesus died for our krispy kreme.
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Male 364
Very cleaver - don`t personally agree, but very cleaver...
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Male 1,378
jesus died for our dunkin donuts
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Male 115
I`m not sure i understand this completley. is it trying to say god is all in your head?
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Male 531
heh heh
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Male 526
what what what? a christian bashing post happened four-ish hours ago, and a flame war hasn`t erupted yet!? Are we done posting on reposts now? Or is I-A-B finally past all of that religious-bickering nonsense?
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Female 2,120
The original post was even better, it had color. :P
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Male 15,510
Is this someone`s idea of a repost ??
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Male 493
Heh. Kinda funny.
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Female 91
there`s pie in heaven!
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Male 2,579
Perfection
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Male 977
lol
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Male 1,455
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