Very Strange Erotica: The Petals Fall Twice [Pic]

Submitted by: littlemissqt 6 years ago in Funny

This is the most unerotic erotica ever written, but as a comedy, it works great.
There are 121 comments:
Female 209
hehehe peeny
0
Reply
Male 220
wtf did i just read
0
Reply
Male 236
zomahgudness! LOL
0
Reply
Male 42
0
Reply
Male 173
how is babby formed? how girl get pragnent?
0
Reply
Female 3,001
what is this i dont even
0
Reply
Female 627
what?
0
Reply
Male 541
"Sans peeny"

LMAO
0
Reply
Female 208
Well. Now you`re blind, oops.
0
Reply
Female 212
Alice in Wonderland as Linsey Lohan.
0
Reply
Male 258
Did Butters write that?
0
Reply
Female 15
as well as "sans penis"
0
Reply
Female 15
i wasn`t expecting to laugh but i actually LOL`d. the last line just cracked me up
0
Reply
Male 626
lol. this cracked me up. xD
0
Reply
Female 3,598
PEENY... hehehe... HOOHA... hahaha...
0
Reply
Male 58
a crappy erotic book. do you want good stuff, go read Guillaume Apollinaire... this guy will make you read things that you never imagined to do in bed...

btw, he was friend of Picasso, who draw in one of his books. In addition he was accused to be the responsible to stole Monalisa from Louvre in the beginning of the XX Century.
0
Reply
Male 1,140
No.

J.. Just. No.
0
Reply
Male 369
Aw dude thats mah fetish!
0
Reply
Male 15,832
Engrish pr0n - lol.
0
Reply
Male 730
Hahahaha Slickling
0
Reply
Male 42
Peeny!
0
Reply
Male 1,451
I always thought it was weird that I felt the need to relieve myself after orgasm...

Now I know I shouldn`t leave the bedroom.
0
Reply
Male 24
"He wrenched his peeny away from Melissa`s grubby paws"

omg that made me almost cry laughing
0
Reply
Male 1,471
That`s kinda trolly actually :S..
0
Reply
Male 200
My entire readthrough consisted purely of "wtf looks" and laughter. freaking amazing.
0
Reply
Female 1,172
BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! That`s drating awesome. Made me think of Bloodninja for some reason.
0
Reply
Female 956
that was amazing

and by that i mean hilarious
0
Reply
Female 263
One word: O_o
0
Reply
Female 170
i havent laughed this hard in a long time
0
Reply
Female 192
Watch, next time I`m getting it on with my boyfriend, this will come to mind, and everything will be ruined.
0
Reply
Male 1,744
this reminds of South Park`s "The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs"

Greatest story ever written
0
Reply
Male 987
That was supposed to be erotic?
0
Reply
Male 6
Wow. So many layers to this.

1st layer: lolwut?!

2nd layer: WTF!!!

3rd layer (after EvilCheeseXY cites source): rofl!

This is bad on so many levels. Awesome.
0
Reply
Female 1,181
omg that is brilliant. i`m gonna plagiarize it and submit it to my lit teacher.
0
Reply
Male 3,431
I too, am now blind.
0
Reply
Female 1,203
um....why can`t she speak proper english? Is this some kind of "pooping on the mentally challenged after having them give you a blowjob" fetish? Oh wait! Gary must be the Oakland teacher and he must be doing this with a student. All makes sense now? Nope, still traumatized by both these things, I am.
0
Reply
Male 11,739
O_o whaaaaaa????
0
Reply
Female 122
hooha.. literally made me "lol"
0
Reply
Male 2,516
just so wrong ...
0
Reply
Male 8
LMAO..this is so great. Dramatic reading.
0
Reply
Male 33
"That`s because you`re blind now, Mildred"
i loled hard
0
Reply
Male 313
"Hilarious and time consuming, yet I would still say completely inappropriate for this site."

I agree
0
Reply
Female 91
I don`t even.
0
Reply
Male 3,915
woah...that went from weird...to freakin crazy weird....
0
Reply
Male 1,240
@FaLa620: Only a swede can do it. Send me 200 USD and I`ll do it for you (I know a guy).
0
Reply
Male 25,416
wrong
0
Reply
Male 80
So how exactly does one go about nominating something for the Nobel in literature?
0
Reply
Male 9
Male 4,793
What the fack did i just read? Idk wtf to do anymore.
0
Reply
Male 32
... what the f?...
0
Reply
Female 839
so funny, and obviously intentionally so
0
Reply
Male 6,077
Um...no. Just, no.
0
Reply
Female 1,356
so much lol
0
Reply
Male 179
That was hilarious!!! It sounded like it was written by a 5th grader with the grammar skills of a 3rd grader, but nonetheless it was awesomely bad!!!
0
Reply
Female 1,329
WTH!! That is just the most....that is just NO!!
0
Reply
Male 136

0
Reply
Female 1,743
I don`t even.....
0
Reply
Male 347
(...)"and pooping all over her unbelievably average body"(...)

Genius.
0
Reply
Male 358
I need a cold shower.
0
Reply
Male 242
INSTANT ERECTION.
0
Reply
Female 15
"I would like to continue satisfying you, sans peeny" Ah, romance <3
0
Reply
Female 682
ewewewewewew!!!!!!anything ANYTHING but poop! bleh...
0
Reply
Male 2
Such an amazing piece of literature, if I do say so myself.
0
Reply
Female 1,435
omg. what the hell was that? what the...! srsly!?!?!? i can`t believe i read that. that was just ...wrong!
0
Reply
Male 203
I am dumber now for having read that.
0
Reply
Male 1,240
See, now there`s a guy who knows how to write. I just wished he could add some more poop. It was magical.
0
Reply
Male 540
This is most excellent.
0
Reply
Male 558
I LMAO`d, I`m not entirely sure this wasn`t the intended reaction...
0
Reply
Male 1,547
page 143...
0
Reply
Male 2,441
I love when my peeny gets a swift headbutt.
0
Reply
Male 2,034
O_o
0
Reply
Male 1,067
"She could feel her horny levels rising to 30%"

I was nearly in tears.
0
Reply
Male 224
That`s because you`re blind now, Mildrid.
0
Reply
Male 493
I would buy a novelization of this, this is the best goddamned thing I`ve ever read.
0
Reply
Male 39,929
"a swift headbutt"

OUCH!

I`d kick the bitch in the Hooha!
0
Reply
Male 594
What?
0
Reply
Male 864
This has to be a joke... Right? Please tell me this is a parody.
0
Reply
Male 440
error otica win
0
Reply
Male 257
oh my drating christ
0
Reply
Male 2,988
I`m at a lost for words. Well done IAB, that was kinda awesome
0
Reply
Male 2,841
I`d buy this.
0
Reply
Male 40,764
so bad. in so many ways! brainbleach required!
0
Reply
Male 5,413
`Granted she was still alive` WHAT!?
0
Reply
Male 535
damn, that`s truly brilliant wordplay xD
0
Reply
Male 110
I want MOAR!
0
Reply
Male 959
He gave her a Cleveland Steamer. Gary was truly a thoughtful lover
0
Reply
Female 843
Haha, peeny. That`s the word I use any time outside the bed. And what my 2-year-old calls his unit. Peeny or peener.

But that`s a pretty interesting book...
0
Reply
Male 70
I...I...I...I just don`t know what to say...
0
Reply
Male 705
Time to work some magic...
0
Reply
Male 161
"her unbelievably average body" At least this guy has realistic standards.
0
Reply
Male 1,598
.... What the hell is this
0
Reply
Male 39,929
I first thought of making a rude comment about this being a page from one of IAB`s fan`s diary... but I`ll just laugh at the "hooha" word instead! LOL
0
Reply
Female 1,593
WTF? lol
0
Reply
Female 833
what




the




drat?
0
Reply
Male 819
I`m so turned on right now...
0
Reply
Female 2,120
I love it!
0
Reply
Male 346
Thats because your blind now Mildred.

Im using that.
0
Reply
Female 290
......... wow... I`ll remember to read this every time I do not want to be excited.
0
Reply
Male 3,745
good god...
0
Reply
Male 795
Wow. Uhhh... Huh.
0
Reply
Male 2,548
Candid brilliance!
God bless your psychosexual issues Chip Zdarsky!
0
Reply
Female 220
hahaha peeny... That`s what I say in front of my son. To me it seemed like a `nice` word but not anymore. Thanks.
0
Reply
Female 97
Let me also add that if this is a project that he follows thru on, OMG I look forward to more. lol
0
Reply
Female 97
0
Reply
Male 247
wtfffff
0
Reply
Male 315
Que?
0
Reply
Male 1,256
"It`s just the poop baby, let it work it`s magic."

Huuuuge lulz.
0
Reply
Male 2,085
I couldn`t get past the use of the word `peeny.`
0
Reply
Male 79
I came twice reading this awesomeness. We need more porn like this.
0
Reply
Male 2,422
Japanese furry with english as a second language. It`s the only explanation for this abomination unto the Lord.
0
Reply
Male 183
doubleyou. tee. eff.
0
Reply
Male 1,122
Hilarious and time consuming, yet I would still say completely inappropriate for this site.

0
Reply
Male 15,510
Lmao that was real baaaaad. I wonder what book is that lol
0
Reply
Male 801
Was this written by a child?
0
Reply
Female 1,652
This was a mix of WTF and preteen attempts at writing smut.
0
Reply
Male 44
not strange, the BBC put something erotic this weekDid the rat bite your penis?
0
Reply
Female 95
Why? :( why did I read the whole thing!
0
Reply
Female 72
oh no.
0
Reply
Male 553
what the drat did i just read?
0
Reply
Male 886
"That`s just the poop, baby."


0
Reply
Female 1,605
Link: Very Strange Erotica: The Petals Fall Twice [Pic] [Rate Link] - This is the most unerotic erotica ever written, but as a comedy, it works great.
0
Reply