New Semen-Based Cookbook: Gift Idea For Mom? [Pic]

Submitted by: the_windy 6 years ago in

This begs the question: Men, would you eat your own jizz if your lady cooked something delicious with it?
There are 114 comments:
Male 1,834
i have some raw product for whoever whants to come yank some ;-()
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Male 228
I love how the editors of this site could ask a question like that but still not allow comments to print words like f.u.c.k. or s.h.i.t.
come on.
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Male 476
I think I will Buy the book... Prepare a wonderful meal and invite my friends over for dinner. While they are eating and complementing me in the meal, I will then hand them the book and show them which wonderful recipe I had used! "Here guys.. take a look." Well.. Off I go.. I must start preparing at once! ;)
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Male 10,440
[quote] Actually, 20 minutes [/quote]

I don`t know about that... whenever I felt the need to do it so soon after, I got hardly anything out.
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Female 5,222
|-X dnw
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Male 101
I did not see that, I did nont see that, I did not see that, I did nont see that, I did not see that, I did nont see that, I did not see that, I did nont see that, I did not see that, I did nont see that...

aaaaAAA!! *runs in panic*
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Male 39,544
I had some for breakfast this morning.

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Male 6,694
I think I like my semen best in my lady.
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Male 383
"This begs the question: Men, would you eat your own jizz if your lady cooked something delicious with it?"
Wait... So you`re saying it`s not normal to eat it anyways? <.< >.>
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Male 1,184
"It takes several hours for 1 man to re-fill"

Actually, 20 minutes. And 20 minutes doesn`t exactly cost anything. Nor would several hours.
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Male 10,440
[quote] semen is inexpensive to produce and commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants [/quote]

Actually, it would be rather expensive. It takes several hours for 1 man to re-fill, and each time you only get a teaspoon full. I see this as a horribly impractical idea.
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Female 1
Today on Iron Chef America, our main ingredient is seman which you must harvest your self.

Grossss
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Male 39,544
D`OH!!!

Stupid me! Cows don`t make semen.
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Female 2,695
"semen is inexpensive to produce and commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants"
restaurants?
RESTAURANTS?!
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Female 682
hmmmmm....it doesn`t have very good chemical properties....just a water-based mucus....it would flake and get crusty, right? perhaps as a pie topping....lol
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Male 1,196
that`s nasty
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Female 676
I just threw up a little.
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Male 39,544
@ Linkenberger - "not all semen tastes the same. I mean, much like cows, it depends on the diet of the producer. "

How much cow semen have you sampled to know this?





OH! you meant like milk or meat or something!!
You should be more clear.
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Male 4,680
"This was not taken from experience."

That line made me laugh so much.
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Male 247
DamienLike, that was pure genius! Thank you for making me laugh today.
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Male 7,123
I could watch Nigella do a show on this, but Ramsay can just f**k off.
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Male 1,164
They neglected to mention the fact that not all semen tastes the same. I mean, much like cows, it depends on the diet of the producer.

This was not taken from experience.
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Female 1,652
Yes, honey! Into the cake batter!

That`s just wrong.
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Male 2,220
It would go well with fanny pasta, you know, cunnilinguini.
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Male 705
Well, I suppose it`s one way to get my gilfriend to swallow.
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Male 876
"Semen is inexpensive to produce..." Nicely put.
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Male 838
Ok, now, I wanna point something out... I see a lot of women on this board saying "Eww" and "Gross!" and the like... However, I know that a majority of you gladly swallow when the moment arises... And do so, I might add, without the benefit of flavorings or other ingredients. This person is only trying to make it a little more flavorful for ya, that`s all. lol
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Male 886
ew ew ew ew ewwwwwwwwww

I was once told my mini-men tasted like bananas.

Granted I had started a fruit and nut diet.

/nod
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Male 39,544
....the Secret`s in the Sauce....
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Male 14,331
*Grabs some bottles of wine* If any ladies are interested in sampling I have some fine wines for pairing. I`d recommed a white wine. I`ll be in the back alley.
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Female 1,515
I was gagging just reading this >.<
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Male 628
i screamed whilst reading throughout
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Male 586
that is the most horrifying thing ever.
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Male 1,016
Wow god help us if the recipe calls for a cup .....not only do you get nutritious food but a workout at the same time....
or your G/F ( wife would say F--- you) says " Honey sit back and relax I feel like baking and I need some semen....I need a cup so you better be ready !!!
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Female 4,039
I`m glad semen remains neglected as food.
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Male 39,544
For everyone who said "no way I`d eat that"

What makes you think we`d tell you before eating?
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Female 1,578
Hey, secret santa person....
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Male 621
Oh my good god in heaven.
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Female 751
yeah that would be a mild form of cannabalism. I just couldn`t do it.
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Male 271
oh my.

my my my my.

this isnt right at all.

why cant people realise that cooking with cum is just unacceptable?
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Male 141
It`s always been said that the most important ingredient in any recipe... is love.


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Male 1,067
I remember when it was considered to be a "f*ck you" to do that in someone`s food.
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Female 277
"Pretty sure most people would consider killing someone and drinking their blood to be cannibalism."

They would be wrong.
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Male 4,290
[quote]@almightbob1, did you suckle your mothers tits when you were a baby [/quote]
Probably. I don`t remember. But I wouldn`t do it now.
And I`m pretty sure I didn`t eat any jizz as a baby.
I`m not sure where you`re going with this.

[quote]Cannibalism applies only to flesh, not bodily fluids. [/quote]
Pretty sure most people would consider killing someone and drinking their blood to be cannibalism.
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Male 143
Here`s a nice review on this book I copied from that site.

By Phil Parks
This book is absolutely wonderful. Not only do I use semen for my skin supplements but now my diet contains at least one to two semen meals a day. I feel my youth returning after every meal. I`m refreshed and it takes me back to my days in high school. Here`s one of my favorite meals: MAN MADE OYSTERS - I like to call this recipe "Phil`s Tangy Tonsil Surprise" Cleaned oyster shells Chilled fresh semen (preferably from 18 an year-old), the more the better!....
rest is boring.
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Female 152
Hell if my wife wanted to make me something delicious with a (non waste) body fluid of mine, Hell, if it tastes good I`ll eat it. It came form my body sh*t, it can just go back in XD
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Male 3,076
LULZ Interesting twist indeed!
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Male 527
On the one hand, I see guys buying this book for their girlfriends, just to participate in the prep work. On the other, their not going to want to taste the results of their efforts.
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Male 586
Do they have saliva-based cook book as well? Semen isn`t nutritious or bad for you... stupid
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Female 1,589
My friend showed me this.
I swear!
*cough*
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Female 1,623
Lol dude, there`s no way you can convince me to eat that. Gross
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Male 225
there should be a law:
all books can be translated into any language except asian books. asian books must be burnt.
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Male 767
i wonder if they have a semen tapioca
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Male 757
DURT! DURT! DURT!
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Female 74
Herpes is NOT a food allergy.
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Female 2,289
*pukes*
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Female 243
I have a feeling this would be a rich person delicacy somewhere in the world in the future, if not now.
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Female 243
SherbertFizz beat me to it.

Cannibalism applies only to flesh, not bodily fluids.

Mild cannibalism? Would that be like accidently eating a finger that was in your Wendy`s chili?
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Female 277
@Quik2TheStab
Canibilism is the act of eating flesh, I have no idea why you are ejaculating flesh, but I would seek help with that.
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Female 2,674
"Sweat and Salty chicken"


HAHAHAHA! Gross.
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Female 614
i wish it would show the reviews
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Male 541
"Ahh nice icing on that cake!"
"Sure!"
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Male 4,793
"i wanna know why apparently semen is found in most restaurants... "

cause men work there?

and

"Yay, cannibalism. Mild cannibalism, but cannibalism nonetheless."

Then I guess we are all cannibals? (breastfeeding)
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Female 59
I have this book.

For my defense, I`m a sexologist, and it was offered to me as a joke when I graduated.

It`s just as it seem... a cookbook, that include little bit of sperm in each recipe... no I never served anything from this book to anyone ... I`m not even sure where it is anymore... but it was a funny gift, I highly suggest it for the holidays ~
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Male 494
"Like a fine wine or cheese"

Aheh. I wonder if there are any... Heh. Sperm-tasting events. Aheahahahah.
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Male 2,868
So fcuking foul.
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Male 15,510
"heh... I actually bought this as a gag gift for a friend a couple years ago. She collects cook books and thought it was hilarious!"

Is she serving flan more often now?
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Male 1,744
this definitely needs to filed under the WTF category
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Male 39,544
What is the Nutritional Value of Sperm?
Here`s a link.

Answers.com

It includes "15 calories" per serving.

I would like to know how big a serving is. I mean, If it`s been a while I`m serving up a much bigger portion than if it`s 3 times a day.

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Male 2,619
Part of the description makes me giggle. "Like a fine wine or cheese"
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Male 68
Well, at least now I know what I`m getting my girlfriend for christmas!
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Male 1,222
@ultimakewl
Me too
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Male 383
"new"? This is as old as the internet :o
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Female 63
heh... I actually bought this as a gag gift for a friend a couple years ago. She collects cook books and thought it was hilarious!
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Female 3,598
mmm...mmm... semen...
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Male 120
huh. so....is there a market for this stuff then? like what is the going rate for one gallon of semen?
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Male 1,244
I will never look at flan the same way again :(
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Male 833
i wanna know why apparently semen is found in most restaurants...
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Male 1,081
"an interesting twist" indeed.
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Male 1,598
This is great for all of your bukkake loving friends!
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Male 658
Yay, cannibalism. Mild cannibalism, but cannibalism nonetheless.
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Male 1,299
So yeah- I pretty much vomitted.
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Male 15,510
Japan that you? Russia? and whats is up with those 42,222 people liking the product??
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Male 2,424
Hey! I`m finally useful in the kitchen!
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Male 25,417
Wow, if the man eats pinapple the seman is sweeter apparently so i guess thats gonna be used in a dessert :)
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Female 133
Semen Flan??? I`ll pass.
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Female 1,356
i hope they`re talking about fish semen... i mean... not human semen... i mean... apparently it`s a delicacy in japan, but hey, Japan!
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Male 2,688
@Ruthless1990

In response to your earlier statement, do you need a good source of ingredients to go with you book order?

In response to your second comment, yes... That is EXACTLY where that started... Semen has no bleaching qualities on your teeth... Though I could imagine the salts and proteins can`t be all too bad for you in that aspect.
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Male 15,832
Trust me, ladies. It`s best fresh out of the tap.
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Male 359
....and....boom goes the dynamite...
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Female 3,001
i have also heard of people brushing there teeth with the stuff, cause it makes them white. i am suspicious that the rumour was made up by men in the hope that someone would be stupid enough to fall for it...
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Male 314
After cooking the semen I doubt any diseases would still be alive, but maybe I`m wrong
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Female 126
On Tosh.0, Daniel Tosh made the whole audience eat tapioca & told them afterwords what book he got the recipe from. (this one)
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Male 1,292
@almightbob1, did you suckle your mothers tits when you were a baby

that said, this concept is terrifying,

and what of any diseases/infections carried in the semen
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Male 2,419
@almightybob1
you could earn yourself a free meal every week :P
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Male 3,915
yeah....this is old news....and no...i would not eat it....gross

and Marissameows...i`m pretty sure the process of cooking would get rid of it....but...ya never know
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Male 1,598
And they picked something so... appetizing... for the cover.
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Female 1,148
The food my boyfriend and I would prepare would taste f*cking awful.
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Male 39,544
List of recipies from the book...

Jizz Jerkey
Cum Cakes
Manonaise
Cream Sauce
Jerk-Off Jello
Wank Weiners
Semen Soufflé
Sweat and Salty chicken


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Male 2,388
the internet: "expect sickness"
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Male 559
ugh
what happened to IAB
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Male 87
i knew i was saving that half gallon of semen for a reason.
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Female 3,001
*orders the book*
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Female 152
Actually this thing is super old and been passed around the internet forever.
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Male 4,290
Absolutely not. Just like I wouldn`t eat human flesh no matter how deliciously it was prepared.

Although if restaurants want to pay me for my baby batter, that`s a whole other kettle of fish.
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Female 171
raise your hand if you want (possible) HIV in your food.
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Female 843
"Semen is inexpensive to produce..."

I didn`t think you had to spend anything to produce it.
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Female 1,070
... o_o!!
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Female 293
i like the pudding recipe.
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Male 54
I already eat my own jizz. The real questions is, should I be selling it to restaurants?
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Male 39,544
It makes one wonder how WINDY knows about this.

?

Anything you want to tell us?
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Male 716
Who the f*ck would post this? Off IAB. Now.
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Female 1,593
What are the measurements? Squirts?
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Female 1,589
Link: New Semen-Based Cookbook: Gift Idea For Mom? [Pic] [Rate Link] - This begs the question: Men, would you eat your own jizz if your lady cooked something delicious with it?
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