Ripped From This Week`s Newspaper: Idiocy! [Pic]

Submitted by: Sleepygean 6 years ago in Funny

Logical theory: People who live on Sullivan Road are stupid.
There are 66 comments:
Female 494
DamienLike, that was a good one; I must say...
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Female 494
DamienLike, that was a good one; I must say...
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Male 51
A man drove in his car and ran out of gas, then he filled gas and his car was okay.

(Slightly more exiting story)
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Female 430
then officer get into his car and went back to the station and told his friends this funny story about the man who thought amazon delivery man a bad man, everybody at the station laghued about it and when they get home they told thier families about the man who thought...... etc
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Male 1,744
wow, slow news day
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Male 958
So hes got boxxyphobia?
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Male 65
tldr
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Male 5,624
"The officer said he could see the package was clearly marked and ask `did you order anything?`

The man answered `Why yes, I did!` He then offered the officer a toke of Jamaican Red.

The officer declined, saying `No, thanks. I stick to `shrooms.`
The officer then left the scene..."
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Female 1,356
"Thank you officer :D, I am now comfortable with opening the box"
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Male 48
lol Ohio. That`s a bit from the police blotter from the Hudson Hub Times. Leave it to the rich white suburbanites to lead the paranoia charge.
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Male 25,417
ha ha ha! better safe than sorry! but you have 2 think twice with amazon and those crazy prices!
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Female 33
haha. I wonder if the unknown person was wearing brown or blue? hmmm.
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Male 3,482
[quote]Nah, the government isn`t creating an atmosphere of fear and paranoia.

We all are just naturally this paranoid and fearful.[/quote]
Has nothing to do with the government, or any outside force...

A lot of people are just f*cking retarded... And I think THAT`S scarier than ANYTHING the government or any terrorist is doing.
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Female 494
DamienLike, that was a good one; I must say...
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Male 886
Nah, the government isn`t creating an atmosphere of fear and paranoia.

We all are just naturally this paranoid and fearful.
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Male 705
"Wow. How do people like that get dressed?"

They hire people from the UK.
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Female 688
that`s a really badly written article :/
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Male 1,184
Fuego, I don`t get the newspaper anymore, but mine usually had exclusively thefts and traffic accidents.
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Male 1,287
It`s the police blotter section. A lot of newspapers have them and they`re frequently filled with inane stories such as this one.
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Female 4,225
/me lifts her hand palms her face
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Male 6,694
Wow. How do people like that get dressed ?
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Male 2,868
Was this man, by chance, mentally retarded?
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Male 39,570
I sit in the dark with tin foil on my head so the government doesn`t read my thoughts. Their uniformed agent comes to my door every day! {except Sunday}

Trust no one.
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Male 40,326
A uniformend man leaves suspicious envelopes in a box attached to my house almost every day! I call the police each time...
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Male 3,076
slow news day
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Male 13
Wow, so he was unable to rationalise that ordering something and then a package being delivered could be related? *facepalm*
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Male 363
Wow, how boring is your town?
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Male 556
Sounds like the inner workings of a strange delusion.
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Male 86
The police got trolled !!!
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Male 838
This... this hurts my soul.
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Male 1,357
amazing
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Male 3,842
"News...paper?" What is this "Newspaper" of which you speak?
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Male 1,108
Who says they`re not making people paraniod with all this talk of terrorism.
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Male 798
mryouknow: +1 internet
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Male 950
dum dum
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Female 10
Ergh. That`s sad
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Female 1,283
Ah, the standard day of a cop, dealing with idiots.
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Male 2,516
only in america :-P
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Male 1,081

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Male 95
"Um, what was the point of that newspaper story?"

Whats the point of the story? Wtf is the point of the idiot calling the police.
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Male 3,745
this is why we cant have nice things...
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Male 1,598
Um, what was the point of that newspaper story?
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Female 1,677
OldOllie: Very true, it`s ridiculous. My friend ordered a laptop (new and expensive) and she was at school when it was delivered; what did they do? They left it on the front step! Right in plain view of anybody walking by, she was so pissed off. Nobody ran off with it luckily, but seriously how stupid can they be?
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Male 553
Well nothing to see here. Move along. >.> Actually I`ve never seen a person from Amazon deliver my packages. Always some sort of carrier.
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Male 1,882
He finally got that tin-foil hat he ordered.
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Male 15,832
Actually, though, one might not expect UPS to just drop a package on the porch and leave. Unfortunately, that`s EXACTLY what most drivers do now when delivering to residences. I have watched UPS drivers carry a package up to the door, put the package down, fill out their paperwork, and leave without ringing or knocking.

They used to ring the doorbell and wait for you to answer so you could sign for the delivery. This is why they claim they have to charge extra for residential delivery. Then they started dropping the package, ringing the bell, and running like hell -- the old ding-dong-ditch. Now they don`t even bother to do that, but they still charge extra.

I gave up and got a box at one of those mailbox places, and now I have all my packages delivered there. The difference in the shipping rates pays for the box, and I don`t have to worry about having stuff stolen off of my porch.
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Female 1,677
He probably calls the FBI when he gets his credit card bill.

ANTHRAX.
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Male 11,739
You just can`t trust those damn postal carriers. There could have been a poop bomb hidden in that box. The carrier could have known he ordered from Amazon and replaced it with a poop bomb because the resident didn`t give him a Christmas present last year.
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Male 15,832
"Oh, those would be the pipe bombs I ordered last week."
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Female 1,236
Aw, probably just a grandpa having a senior moment. It will happen to us all some day.
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Male 2,441
Lol I don`t even know what to say.
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Male 1,815
Probably just watched Valkyrie
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Male 135
i didnt know they sold suspicious packages on amazon
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Female 531
SANITY PLEASE
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Female 697
....wow. I can`t or rather don`t want to imagine how awful this man is at living an independent life.
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Female 1,894
HAHA wtf... is this world coming to
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Male 307
I love the police reports in small town papers, they always have people calling in for the stupidest things.
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Female 45
Wait, what? Cliffhanger? It sounds like there was a severed head in there at the end.
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Male 514
He bought the pedophilia book
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Male 1,292
Well, that person is stupid, but to assume all the residents on that road are stupid because of the actions of one man is idiocy. With this logic you could say that everyone who lives in that district, in that city, in that state, in that country is stupid... oh wait, I recant.
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Male 2,172
The package must have arrived faster then he could have expected.
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Male 4,290
Should have arrested him for wasting police time. What a moron.
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Male 15,510
He was just lazy to go out and pick it out
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Male 955
what a retard
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Female 1,148
Someone was overly suspicious.
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Female 252
Link: Ripped From This Week`s Newspaper: Idiocy! [Pic] [Rate Link] - Logical theory: People who live on Sullivan Road are stupid.
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