Man Was Forced To Eat His Beard At Gunpoint

Submitted by: WarPaint 6 years ago in Funny

A Kentucky man says two ex-friends cut off his beard & forced him to eat it in a dispute over a tractor. Yee-haw!
There are 58 comments:
Male 87
Eh, why be afraid! But thats BA. "What you in for?" "I force fed a man his own beard for trying to overcharge me for a lawnmower. drat with me."
0
Reply
Male 25,416
really thats the best they can thing about!
0
Reply
Male 237
"one thing led to another and before I knowed it..." hahahaha thank you for reinforcing the stereotype.
0
Reply
Female 59
I guess he now has a big old hair ball in his gut. LOL
0
Reply
Male 1,834
this is why im scared of rednecks
0
Reply
Female 152
"Before I knowd it"
"knowd it"
"Knowd"
......
WHUT?
0
Reply
Male 500
I was just amazed that someone so fat had such a small mouth. You`d think he has to eat almost constantly to maintain that size. Probably can`t leave the vicinity of the fridge for more than a few minutes at a time.
0
Reply
Male 469
Oh the humanity.
0
Reply
Female 547
The mug shots were so damn funny. They looked so dumbfounded.
0
Reply
Male 496
"I believe in the law, I believe that justice has been served and(...)it will be after Tuesday".

That is seriously the best quote ever.
Also, I read "bread" and went into this expecting such. Too funny.
0
Reply
Male 28
don`t think you`d have to force very hard to get him to eat anything
0
Reply
Male 705
I had to check this wasn`t an Onion story.
0
Reply
Male 245
This guy seemed cool and all but that can`t help me from busting out laughing every time I read the title "Man Was Forced To Eat His Beard At Gunpoint".
0
Reply
Male 1,360
Yes he did say "before I knowed it".
And did you notice the "southern style" on his cap?
0
Reply
Male 812
Too many years of inbreeding makes some crazy people.
0
Reply
Male 179
awww. i want to give this guy a hug.
0
Reply
Male 400
Did he say "Before I knowed it"?
0
Reply
Male 660
I could have said something smartass about this guy, but I just loved his accent! He`s got some sick friends though....
0
Reply
Female 261
Sucks, what he went through, but there are worse things they could have made him eat.
0
Reply
Male 511
Is anyone surprised that this story comes out of Kentucky?
0
Reply
Female 10
f#ck i hate my state....
0
Reply
Female 1,236
Umm. Eating hair is not good for the old gut. Those 2 ex-friends are weird assh*les.
0
Reply
Male 72
Reporter`s probably thinking: Fatass, fatass, fatass, FAT MAN WITH A SMALL MOUTH!
0
Reply
Male 107
did anyone else notice his hat? lolololol
0
Reply
Male 2,402
@Gerry1of1

You betcha bubba! SquuuueeeEEELLLLLL! :-P
0
Reply
Male 496
Here`s what the reporter must be thinking: "Get me out of this market. Get me out of this market. Get me out of this market. Get me out of this market."
0
Reply
Male 38,457
@ handys003 - you know that scene by heart?



[backing away slowley]
0
Reply
Male 586
this is so redneck I don`t even know where to begin....
0
Reply
Male 2,402
Hmmm...He said "well one thing led to another".

(Dueling Banjos playing in the background)

"Looks like we got us a sow here, `stead of a boar."

"You sure do got a pertty mouth. You`re gonna do some praying for me boy!"

"Get up, boy. I bet you can squeal. I bet you can squeal like a pig."

" Now let`s you just drop them pants."

"Squeel like a pig!"
0
Reply
Male 219
It would`ve been way better if he had to eat it while it was still attached, I`d even brag about doing something like that :D
0
Reply
Male 3,915
"everything just went haywire"?

where did that saying even come from?

btw....the second i saw "kentucky" i`m like......that makes sense
0
Reply
Male 159
This is what happens, Larry. This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps.
0
Reply
Female 2,120
Why did we want this back during the civil war?
0
Reply
Male 15,510
Bully!
0
Reply
Male 2,441
"Forced to eat beard"
0
Reply
Female 2,674
Gerry: Keep rockin` that new avatar. I like it... but it`s hard for me to recognize you now. I`m all: who does this f*cktard think he is?! Oh wait, it`s Gerry. Ha.
0
Reply
Male 1,108
"If we called the poe-leece" lol i love the south.
0
Reply
Male 38,457
Madest ... you requested it


0
Reply
Male 7,378
A1butcher, I`m with cat hating pmarren.. sheesh! You and Gerry get together to figure out a way do disgust everyone? Why not a steamy, heaping pile of poo?
0
Reply
Male 38,457
lol @ DixxyRarr - ahhh... youthfull innocence.

It got the name Hair Pie because back in the 70`s women had loveley, `pie`-shaped wedges of `hair` down there. Little history for`ya.

Now girls all waxed and look prepubecent. [see pedophile post yesterday]
0
Reply
Female 452
Who posted this? Yee-haw is a stereotypical cowboy phrase. I don`t believe Kentucky was ever a cowboy state.
0
Reply
Male 4,594
a1butcher and gerry1of1, you know I love you both as my brothers, but the avatar, it`s painful. I have to go with the rest on this one.
0
Reply
Female 2,674
Hair pie, huh? That`s a thing? *googles*

No kidding! I`ll add that to my "names for vag" index.
0
Reply
Male 4,807
Maybe he had a little to much gravy in his beard.


and on a side note..
Gerry1of1`s new avatar.... For The WIN
0
Reply
Male 38,457
madest - don`t be dissen` The HOFF
0
Reply
Male 1,815
What an iddy bitty mouth he has! How does he get all that food into that iddy bitty mouth?
0
Reply
Male 25
i second that request, all in favour?
0
Reply
Male 1,222
Im with madest on the motion of the avatar
0
Reply
Male 7,378
Gerry1of1, I have a request. Please change your new avatar. It`s not working sorry.
0
Reply
Male 541
Haha, this is funny
0
Reply
Male 12,138
Kentucky? I guess it`s spreading from Florida...
0
Reply
Male 1,931
It`s interesting to see how violence often corresponds to a lack of intelligence.
0
Reply
Male 2,868
1) Pretty sure meth had to be involved somehow. I had my suspicions when I read the title, but it was when he said "things just went haywire" that confirmed it.

2) Early Cotton hat FTW.

3) @OldOllie- lol, but hair has no dietary fiber.
0
Reply
Male 683
Soooo fat!
0
Reply
Male 38,457
mmmm Hair Pie!

Here`s a photos of Hair Pie

0
Reply
Male 322
i`m speechless...

come on south, what are you doing down there?
0
Reply
Male 15,832
From the looks of him, that`s probably the most fiber he`s gotten in one meal in his life.
0
Reply
Male 9
Link: Man Was Forced To Eat His Beard At Gunpoint [Rate Link] - A Kentucky man says two ex-friends cut off his beard & forced him to eat it in a dispute over a tractor. Yee-haw!
0
Reply