Fortune Cookie Predicts Future... And Past? [Pic]

Submitted by: fancylad 6 years ago Funny

The cookies--they"re getting smarter.
There are 51 comments:
Male 88
What if I get two of these? The second one will tell me to ignore the previous cookie (which told me to ignore the previous cookie). So I DON`T ignore the previous cookie making my the fortune cookie before the first one telling mt to ignore the previous cookie NOT ignored? That`s awesome!
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Male 1,371
That`s not a fortune, it`s instructions.
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Male 91
There is no cookie.
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Female 61
It`s because the previous cookie is being bad. It just wants attention...
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Female 533
so you`re saying my fortune cookie was a lie?!
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Male 152
what if you`re last fortune cookie told you to ignore you next fortune cookie? the first won would obviously take precedence because of age right? or would the new one be more important since its well...newer, shiner, now with 36% more fortune.
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Female 176
thats so not a fortune.
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Female 635
gasp!!
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Female 336
I still think my favorite fortune cookie message was the best. I got one that said:
________________________________
You will move to a wonderful new
________________________________

It`s so mysterious...so tantalizing! A wonderful new what?! Job? House?

PLANET?!?!?!

Oh pleeeeeeease let it be planet!
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Female 2,289
"GuessWhat122 - than you`re a smart*ss >_>"

then**
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Female 517
GuessWhat122 - than you`re a smart*ss >_>
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Male 2
what if this was my first cookie?
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Female 5,222
lol
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Male 1,054
"It is a shame when IAB doesn`t quote, but shouldn`t we be an example? For example, your comment is exactly the punchline of an XKCD-strip. You didn`t get it from there did you? ;)"

Silly - variations on the "in bed" tag (including "except in bed") for fortune cookies have been around for at least 4 decades.
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Male 1,054
I expected it to read "You will be hungry in an hour".
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Female 1,623
I love those cookies.
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Male 6,694
But the last cookie was a good one. Oh well, so much for the wealth coming my way.
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Male 89
assuming the same person also had the `previous` cookie lol
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Male 648
The worst is when you get one at the end of the meal, that says "The beef is actually Cat"
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Male 593
If the previous cookie said don`t trust the next cookie, then your completely f*cked! XD
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Male 1,043
._. I got confused..
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Male 877
i like cream carpets
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Male 224
But what if you get this again after this one...do you ignore the cookie which told you to ignore the other cookie so therefore the first cookie is still in effect...crap, i just confused myself.
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Male 2,553
>Uncertainty
It is a shame when IAB doesn`t quote, but shouldn`t we be an example? For example, your comment is exactly the punchline of an XKCD-strip. You didn`t get it from there did you? ;)
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Male 2,748
nice... but wat if it was a good one?
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Female 463
Haha. -_-
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Male 893
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Female 196
When it comes to fortune cookies, I tend to add "EXCEPT in bed" to the end of my fortunes. I find it to be a fun but negative little twist on the usual game.
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Male 3
@zmeace
they say you should end every fortune cookie with "...in bed"
just put it with em all and you get some funny results
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Female 282
@zmeace If you say `in bed` after things like fortune cookies, song titles, things like that...it just makes it funnier.
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Male 2,893
Fortune cookies don`t mean sh*t.
Oh crap now I`m gonna die next time I eat Chinese food......
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Male 807
in bed? what does that mean about this pic
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Male 599
my favorite is:
Always consult others before trying unusual things.
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Male 3,894
...in bed.
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Male 50
Ha I know the guy at this chinese place by my house, he orders "Gag Fortune Cookies" silly things like "Order More Chinese Food!" and "You didn`t eat chicken!" Kinda dumb but it`s always funny to see an unordinary fortune cookie :P
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Male 292
In bed.
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Male 770
My Favorite cookie:
Unexpected visitors are comming. Lock your doors.

I Kid You Not.
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Female 172
Best one ever: "Whew! It`s about time I got out of that cookie!"
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Male 333
Haha they should make comedy ones but no cheesy jokes
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Male 36,541
vv @Deppfan9551 The cake is a LIE!
Lolz!
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Male 25,416
lolz
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Female 137
Best one I ever got was "You are looking for guidance in the wrong places. Cookies are for eating."
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Female 91
(Ignore pubic hair in my carpet.)
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Male 332
My favorite cookie of all time was one that said "Promote literacy. Buy a box of fortune cookies today!"
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Male 725
I remember getting one that said "Soon, you will be with riches."

I still haven`t won the lottery. :(
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Female 9
Haha, I got one that said "You will recieve a nice cake." I never got that cake.
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Male 16
I once got one that said "You will be hungry again soon, order a takeout now."
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Female 667
in bed
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Male 838
Talent.
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Male 1,625
I want to print some that say "Poisonous, Do Not Eat."
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Male 19,879
Link: Fortune Cookie Predicts Future... And Past? [Pic] [Rate Link] - The cookies--they`re getting smarter.
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