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Rating: 2.8
Category: Funny
Date: 08/14/10 11:02 AM

67 Responses to Fat Man Shoots A Gun, Makes It His Bitch

  1. Profile photo of Joshguy666
    Joshguy666 Male 13-17
    50 posts
    August 13, 2010 at 1:05 pm
    Link: Fat Man Shoots A Gun, Makes It His Bitch - So much for Newton`s laws of motion. (Science geeks will get this reference.)
  2. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25408 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:18 am
    wow, should be a bigger gun tho
  3. Profile photo of SunnyNphilly
    SunnyNphilly Male 18-29
    645 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:18 am
    OLD NEWS
  4. Profile photo of davymid
    davymid Male 30-39
    12151 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:28 am
    Come on, seriously, there`s fat, and there`s TOO fat. F*ck a duck.

    Seriously, if I met this dude as an assailant in a dark alleyway, all I`d have to do is throw a taco down his left flank. Distracted, hole in the face, game over.
  5. Profile photo of Manipura
    Manipura Female 18-29
    61 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:38 am
    I don`t get it.
  6. Profile photo of B-b-beccah
    B-b-beccah Female 18-29
    668 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:50 am
    yep, that was a fat man shooting a gun alright...
  7. Profile photo of skypirate
    skypirate Male 18-29
    2346 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:56 am
    in his defense, id like to see any of you bump fire a pistol.
  8. Profile photo of I-IS-BORED
    I-IS-BORED Male 18-29
    2419 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 1:01 am
    ummm... fat people don`t only exist in america and shooting ranges don`t only exist in america, so i`m willing to bet real money that somewhere this has happened outside of america
  9. Profile photo of Dievs
    Dievs Male 18-29
    24 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 1:12 am
    Theoretically, fat people don`t exist only in america; however, I have travelled quite a lot and never met anyone even half his weight outside of USA - so such guys are really, really rare elsewhere.
  10. Profile photo of idiotfilter
    idiotfilter Male 18-29
    3916 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:09 am
    take that Jared!
  11. Profile photo of CodeJockey
    CodeJockey Male 40-49
    5606 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:13 am
    Davy,
    Don`t you think he`d already have his own?
  12. Profile photo of dukat
    dukat Female 50-59
    71 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:14 am
    My brother works in Romania and he has said he has only seen 2 or 3 fat people there in ten years - and they were they only rich people around. I also saw a documentary about fat in America, and one person they chronicled was a kid about 8, who came here from a poor country - it was the variety of food that did him in = he wanted to try everything. They say during the middle ages the only fat people were the rich = sooooooooo does American prosperity breed American obesity?
  13. Profile photo of Angelmassb
    Angelmassb Male 18-29
    15511 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:44 am
    Yeah, why to be healthy when you have a gun
  14. Profile photo of kribbe
    kribbe Male 18-29
    2006 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:47 am
    its difficult to be thin when your wealthy
  15. Profile photo of Volsunga
    Volsunga Male 18-29
    1548 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:51 am
    `Murka!
  16. Profile photo of chunkymonkie
    chunkymonkie Male 13-17
    670 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:00 pm
    dukat, i think its the lack of exercise. everybody has a car these days so after work you can just drive home and watch tv or go on iab. they might even pick up some mcdonalds on the way.
  17. Profile photo of Reignblazer
    Reignblazer Male 18-29
    2334 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:04 pm
    "Seriously, if I met this dude as an assailant in a dark alleyway"

    You wouldn`t see him coming, he can sneak up on you like..the moon :o
  18. Profile photo of Maromi
    Maromi Female 18-29
    1095 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:11 pm
    loud video is loud. D:
  19. Profile photo of sawdusty
    sawdusty Male 40-49
    491 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:11 pm
    Well if you can`t find your penis......
  20. Profile photo of Gerry1of1
    Gerry1of1 Male 50-59
    36198 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:34 pm
    nothing smaller than a cannon could have enough recoil to knock that guy down.
  21. Profile photo of piperfawn
    piperfawn Male 30-39
    4888 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 12:51 pm
    All that is useless if he need ages to extract the gun from the huge ammount of fat.
  22. Profile photo of Siyanor
    Siyanor Male 18-29
    1185 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 1:09 pm
    Dievs, the fattest man in the world lives in Mexico.
  23. Profile photo of ROK9
    ROK9 Male 18-29
    1834 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 1:10 pm
    cool
  24. Profile photo of Omphaloskept
    Omphaloskept Male 40-49
    181 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 1:23 pm
    How do you know he shot a gun? I can`t see what he`s firing his gun at in the video...
  25. Profile photo of MrTwidget
    MrTwidget Male 30-39
    795 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 1:44 pm
    Did he just ejaculate?
  26. Profile photo of darkgear6
    darkgear6 Male 70 & Over
    1378 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 2:10 pm
    I think I did also.
  27. Profile photo of PinkAndGreen
    PinkAndGreen Female 13-17
    918 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 2:36 pm
    Bang, bang, bang.

    I really wanted the gun to fly back into his stomach and then have slow motion of the fat rolls rippling.
  28. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10722 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 2:59 pm
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLDDDDDDDDDDD!!
  29. Profile photo of tyrannus
    tyrannus Male 18-29
    201 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 3:00 pm
    Why is he holding it like that? Also, lose weight.
  30. Profile photo of danthew
    danthew Male 18-29
    2122 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 3:12 pm
    Must... resist urge... to make... nerdy comment...!
  31. Profile photo of I-IS-BORED
    I-IS-BORED Male 18-29
    2419 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 3:18 pm
    @tyrannus he`s bracing it against his stomach to absorb the recoil :P
  32. Profile photo of Angilion
    Angilion Male 40-49
    12390 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 3:28 pm
    Science geeks would also wonder why anyone thinks this disproves(*) Newton`s laws of motion.


    * I know that strictly speaking they have been disproved and aren`t scientific laws, but this is far, far within the boundaries within which they are very accurate approximations.
  33. Profile photo of 66stang
    66stang Male 18-29
    226 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 3:38 pm
    for every action there is an EQUAL and opposite reaction. So if you wanna see this guy move, you`re going to need a cannon
  34. Profile photo of CoffeeDiiva
    CoffeeDiiva Female 40-49
    1605 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 3:44 pm
    he probably holds it like that because he can`t put his arms straight out.
  35. Profile photo of Ace_Mazta
    Ace_Mazta Male 13-17
    699 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 4:06 pm
    its the science of the bouncer belly
  36. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25408 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 5:13 pm
    meh
  37. Profile photo of barberthe
    barberthe Male 18-29
    103 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 5:27 pm
    skypirate, I can shoot faster than that WITHOUT bump firing. I`ve emptied my CZ-82`s 12 round magazine in as little as 1.5 seconds and my Romanian Tokarev`s 8 round magazine in about the same(shoots slower due to the extra recoil). The CZ has a ridiculously nice sweet spot, so I can get it to auto-fire two to four rounds at once with ease(feels like only one trigger pull, but it`s actually not). Bump firing is stupid. Learn to sweet spot your trigger and you`ll never go back.
  38. Profile photo of CrakrJak
    CrakrJak Male 40-49
    17515 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 7:25 pm
    This video is so old it`s annotations are in hieroglyphics.
  39. Profile photo of Seak
    Seak Male 18-29
    1505 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 8:35 pm
    Trigger finger!
  40. Profile photo of GuardinGnome
    GuardinGnome Male 18-29
    2893 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 8:56 pm
    Guns are so damn cool.
    Good thing I have 7.
  41. Profile photo of T-Marley
    T-Marley Male 70 & Over
    602 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 9:23 pm
    Barber, let us see some video of that CZ action.

    This guy probably is the head of a motor scooter gang. Chasing people through wal-mart, firing his pistol wildly.

    The rule in most combat shooting environments that any normal person would face(1-2 attackers, and rarely 3 or more); it is shot placement, not shots fired. If that whole magazine is emptied in a city environment, every bullet goes somewhere. Then you are left with a useless piece of steel, and are lucky if you have a 30% hit rate with a 9mm, with through and through bullet holes. Two in the chest is going to make anyone think twice, and that`s plenty of time for the third to the head, or to give a second attacker something to think about. And then, even with my .45 you still have half a magazine or more left. (Depending on if we talk 1911 or XD)

    "Know not only your target, but what is beyond your target."

    A fairly impractical tactic and a classic definition of a Mall Ninja.
  42. Profile photo of Homegrown71
    Homegrown71 Male 18-29
    224 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 9:24 pm
    Imagine if the US military only recruited people like this...who would drat with an army of these guys toting guns that they can fire by using their fat to absorb the recoil. He can probably be outfitted with two handheld .50 MG`s and just wonder the streets of Baghdad, probably would be able to absorb the IED`s and RPG attacks too.
  43. Profile photo of henryhendrix
    henryhendrix Male 30-39
    722 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 9:26 pm
    Okay, so where`s all the people complaining about how fat America is?
  44. Profile photo of FlamedNight
    FlamedNight Male 18-29
    395 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 9:56 pm
    The comments are always funnier :)
  45. Profile photo of vorpalsword
    vorpalsword Male 18-29
    1452 posts
    August 14, 2010 at 11:04 pm
    what he is doing is bump firing, its where you pull keep pulling on the gun and let the recoil send it back as you are pulling on it and you end up firing a semi automatic fast enough to make it seem automatic
  46. Profile photo of last-iconOC
    last-iconOC Male 13-17
    152 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 12:51 am
    fat people will never cease to amuse me.
  47. Profile photo of shneeblefish
    shneeblefish Male 18-29
    509 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 12:53 am
    That could look pretty damn cool in slow motion with a closeup of his fat.

    ...I think that came out wrong.
  48. Profile photo of spanerbulb
    spanerbulb Male 30-39
    1244 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 1:30 am
    Gee, even fat people can be gun wielding fools.
  49. Profile photo of MikeyNiv
    MikeyNiv Male 18-29
    697 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 4:04 am
    He`s shooting a salad.
  50. Profile photo of draino123
    draino123 Male 30-39
    769 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 4:25 am
    i fired like that all the time at the arcade when i was playing games like "Area 51" and "Time Crisis"
  51. Profile photo of Reignblazer
    Reignblazer Male 18-29
    2334 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 4:31 am
    "He`s shooting a salad."

    :D
  52. Profile photo of FuriousTuna
    FuriousTuna Male 13-17
    39 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 5:09 am
    Yep, you are drated.
  53. Profile photo of ZacWasHere
    ZacWasHere Male 18-29
    101 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 7:36 am
    "He`s shooting a salad" So mean, but I still lol`ed :P
  54. Profile photo of iCyborg
    iCyborg Male 18-29
    176 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 8:51 am
    Recoil is that man`s Bitch...
  55. Profile photo of crystalskyz
    crystalskyz Female 30-39
    359 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 9:51 am
    wow big man
  56. Profile photo of MykeUK
    MykeUK Male 18-29
    364 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 11:16 am
    "No way, bitch, those are MY chicken nuggets. YO DAMN!"
  57. Profile photo of SmilinSam
    SmilinSam Female 18-29
    3599 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 2:36 pm
    watch the video the second on the right at the bottom when this one ends, it much better, it`s a granny shooting a machine gun!!
  58. Profile photo of test-user564
    test-user564 Male 18-29
    491 posts
    August 15, 2010 at 4:41 pm
    "yep thats enough exercise for today"
  59. Profile photo of ardara
    ardara Female 30-39
    48 posts
    August 16, 2010 at 12:29 am
    Impressive. At least he is good at something besides eating.
  60. Profile photo of meepmaker
    meepmaker Male 30-39
    6694 posts
    August 16, 2010 at 7:43 am
    Thats a lot of dude.
  61. Profile photo of barberthe
    barberthe Male 18-29
    103 posts
    August 16, 2010 at 5:12 pm
    T-Marley, my rapid firing is a trick that stays at the range. I know for a fact that it does nothing for accuracy. I am a firm believer in shot placement. I carry my Tok every day and I know without a doubt that I could put every bullet I fire onto a target`s chest at 30 yards, possibly even 40 yards. I`ve been known to shoot silhouette targets at 100 yards with 40% accuracy(meaning on the silhouette, not just on paper). That`s with a pistol, mind you.

    I am not a "spray and pray" guy, I was merely pointing out that there are better ways to achieve a high rate of fire. Your insults are baseless.

    I am simply a normal, law-abiding, laid back, responsible gun owner. I don`t flash it around, I don`t threaten or intimidate with it, I don`t even want to have to use it. I would rather have it and never need it than need it and not have it. I need prove nothing to you. Good day and carry responsibly :)
  62. Profile photo of Chola
    Chola Female 18-29
    56 posts
    August 17, 2010 at 9:19 am
    I saw this video on Tosh.O`s first season. He made a crap load of funny jokes to go along with it.
  63. Profile photo of ryannn24
    ryannn24 Male 18-29
    83 posts
    August 18, 2010 at 4:13 am
    oooooollllllddddd. Not really that funny.
    Obesity is no joke......


    lol
  64. Profile photo of diablito
    diablito Male 18-29
    37 posts
    August 21, 2010 at 5:49 am
    tiight
  65. Profile photo of MaiaTewai
    MaiaTewai Female 13-17
    38 posts
    August 22, 2010 at 1:49 pm
    makes it his b***h?
  66. Profile photo of thecupholder
    thecupholder Female 18-29
    105 posts
    August 22, 2010 at 8:57 pm
    Prefer my rifle.Of course people are going to laugh at a fat guy with a small gun. Its like a cartoon in reality for them.

    sadly a lot of you yanks have only seen guns on NCIS. lol.
    What was it my grandpaw said?" All you need in life is God, guns n` beer.
  67. Profile photo of barberthe
    barberthe Male 18-29
    103 posts
    August 30, 2010 at 1:20 pm
    "All you need in life is God, guns n` beer"

    Only partly true...I never could get a taste for beer.

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