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74 Comments - View/Add
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Rating: 3.3
Category: Funny
Date: 07/12/10 05:03 PM

74 Responses to The Periodic Table Of Swearing [Pic]

  1. Profile photo of fancylad
    fancylad Male 30-39
    18853 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 4:04 pm
    Link: The Periodic Table Of Swearing - NSFW words, but very helpful next time you need to insult someone...
  2. Profile photo of TysonRP
    TysonRP Male 13-17
    312 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:12 pm
    Ysfac!
  3. Profile photo of muhtalikuh
    muhtalikuh Male 18-29
    241 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:12 pm
    funny if i were still in 6th grade.

  4. Profile photo of PsychGeek
    PsychGeek Female 18-29
    1798 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:12 pm
    what is a f*cking ballache?
  5. Profile photo of ryan99
    ryan99 Male 13-17
    2345 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:15 pm
    Plant`s Arsehole.

    Oh my.
  6. Profile photo of hiltacular
    hiltacular Male 13-17
    161 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:16 pm
    the legend is wrong.
  7. Profile photo of alexander_xx
    alexander_xx Male 18-29
    339 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:24 pm
    laame, cmon fancy, at least try

    @psychgeek: ballache is what guys get when theyre tempted with sex for a while and dont get any, balls go nuts produce a ton of sperm and they feel full enough to pop, it really hurts
  8. Profile photo of entwife
    entwife Female 18-29
    536 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:37 pm
    British swearing is somehow funnier
  9. Profile photo of akijade
    akijade Female 18-29
    1006 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:37 pm
  10. Profile photo of Joss19
    Joss19 Female 18-29
    75 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 5:40 pm
    Oh my Jesus. I lol`d SO HARD.

    STINK LIKE A P*SS CEEFAX. Wtf :D
  11. Profile photo of cobrakiller
    cobrakiller Male 18-29
    7470 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 6:04 pm
    doesnt really make any sense. its just a reason to have a bunch of swear words in one place.
  12. Profile photo of DarkFerret
    DarkFerret Male 18-29
    2749 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 6:16 pm
    Tp= [email protected] pocket... get it right
  13. Profile photo of rakoonhat
    rakoonhat Female 30-39
    654 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 6:45 pm
    i think this is a class at FU
    yea, good old FU, offering the latest in profanic and offensive education
  14. Profile photo of ScottSerious
    ScottSerious Male 18-29
    5316 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 6:51 pm
    FoSffb. Sfbb?
  15. Profile photo of sking7
    sking7 Male 30-39
    117 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 7:02 pm
    Ugh! Where`s BINT on this???
  16. Profile photo of goaliejerry
    goaliejerry Male 30-39
    4017 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 7:26 pm
    We don`t say "arse" in the states, thus, I fart in your general direction.
  17. Profile photo of fabarati
    fabarati Male 18-29
    1240 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 7:28 pm
    No Bitch, much less any mention of the son
  18. Profile photo of rainbowfarts
    rainbowfarts Female 18-29
    798 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 7:36 pm
    "doesnt really make any sense. its just a reason to have a bunch of swear words in one place."

    just what I was thinking. Where`s the wit in this??
  19. Profile photo of Ruswut
    Ruswut Male 18-29
    1266 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 7:48 pm
    This is stupid...
  20. Profile photo of Ivar2112
    Ivar2112 Male 18-29
    271 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 8:05 pm
    Might have been funny if they made swears with the actual abbreviations of the elements.
  21. Profile photo of kathismee
    kathismee Female 30-39
    32 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 8:07 pm
    Ah clearly the Queen English version.
  22. Profile photo of riotDX
    riotDX Male 18-29
    600 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 8:26 pm
    would have been much better had they worked with the abbreviations for the actual elements in the periodic table, this way is just dumb
  23. Profile photo of hazeofwar
    hazeofwar Male 18-29
    213 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 8:38 pm
    For some reason, I`m just not impressed by British "curse words." They just sound kind of lame and non-threatening. Like the Chinese guy from sixteen candles. "Those bastages!"
  24. Profile photo of The_Garuness
    The_Garuness Male 18-29
    931 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 8:50 pm
    Ahh, it`s Modern Toss. Most of the time, stuff from them is hilarious but this, not so..
  25. Profile photo of Geogypsy
    Geogypsy Female 18-29
    2546 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 8:53 pm
    Prat in a hat?

    Suddenly I find myself wanting to read Dr Seuss
  26. Profile photo of ElSombrero
    ElSombrero Male 13-17
    716 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 9:33 pm
    I think there are some elements undiscovered here.

    Anyways, I want someone to narrate this like "The element song" for laughs.
  27. Profile photo of Lionhart2
    Lionhart2 Male 40-49
    8306 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 9:56 pm
    > entwife
    > British swearing is somehow funnier

    You cad!
  28. Profile photo of Boredered
    Boredered Male 18-29
    2506 posts
    July 12, 2010 at 11:57 pm
    Had to strain my eyes too hard,
  29. Profile photo of shamille
    shamille Female 18-29
    831 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 12:00 am
    hey what... piss is not a swear word. also, arse couldn`t possibly be a swear word, it has an R.
  30. Profile photo of Handsompod
    Handsompod Male 30-39
    1109 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 1:48 am
    I couldn`t find Prick anywhere, then I saw Pringle wearing c*nt and thought, yeah close enough.

    @lion Bounder!!
  31. Profile photo of alexander_xx
    alexander_xx Male 18-29
    339 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 2:08 am
    id be very suprised if this was actually british.. its farr too inoffensive, and thewhole queens english thing? only actors and thespians speak like that.
  32. Profile photo of r3tr0r0ck3r
    r3tr0r0ck3r Male 18-29
    187 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 2:54 am
    This digaram being shown off on this website makes the riduculously restrictive profanity filter that much more insulting.
  33. Profile photo of Lionhart2
    Lionhart2 Male 40-49
    8306 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 3:37 am
    @Handsompod

    Jolly Rotter!!
  34. Profile photo of Antithet
    Antithet Male 18-29
    41 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 3:48 am
    @hazeofwar Really? So f*g and d****e are better more insulting swearwords? Pah! Swearing is the only thing we Brits can do well!
  35. Profile photo of Handsompod
    Handsompod Male 30-39
    1109 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 4:03 am
    @Lion, How dare you, you bally old pipsqueek!!
  36. Profile photo of kilroy5555
    kilroy5555 Male 30-39
    496 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 5:20 am
    Not very much buggering on here. As an American, that`s the Brit swear word I appreciate the most. We`ve yet to come up with such a concise and elegant way to call someone an a*s f*cker.
  37. Profile photo of madduck
    madduck Female 50-59
    7565 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 5:37 am
    They forgot the two warnings of imminent maternal explosion. ` Oh for the love of God` and `For heavens sake`- whilst I swear with the best of them, when really needed the obscenities don`t quite cut it!
  38. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    32829 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 5:38 am
    86 Wh
    Hey! This gets past the censors! lolz!
  39. Profile photo of duffytoler
    duffytoler Male 40-49
    5195 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 5:57 am
    >>For some reason, I`m just not impressed by British "curse words."

    Some of them fall flat ("balls"? "arse it"?), but there are some really good ones on that list. I`m not sure what "Hammer the bollock out of it" or "Sh*tting a f*cking breeze-block" mean, exactly, but but they`re funny and I am adding them to my repertory. You need a good set of tools when working on a car, and you need a good set of profanity when you are working with tools.
  40. Profile photo of alexander_xx
    alexander_xx Male 18-29
    339 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 6:26 am
    would you americans please get it into your head? british people dont swear like this! we use massive amounts of the words c*nt, f*ck and tw*t, we dont say `ar$e it` we would instead say `f*ck it` we dont say `b*lls` we say `b*llocks` i dont know of any brit that uses the word `bugger` in fact the only person i ever knew that did say that was an american kid trying to sound cool back when i was in primary school (elementary school equivalent)

    and because we swear so much, the only way for people to know were really pissed off is to not swear at all!
  41. Profile photo of meepmaker
    meepmaker Male 30-39
    6694 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 6:36 am
    Local whore. LOL
  42. Profile photo of TheTumor
    TheTumor Male 18-29
    552 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 6:40 am
    right click. Save as..
  43. Profile photo of MightyMaxie
    MightyMaxie Male 18-29
    5 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 6:49 am
    94,95,96 Possibly going to be used in every sentance in the near future thanks iab
  44. Profile photo of -LuckyDucky-
    -LuckyDucky- Male 18-29
    141 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 6:55 am
    Dear Alexander XX,
    Modern Toss is a British company. This was made by British people. If you have a complaint please take it up with your queen or whatever you do over there.
  45. Profile photo of fknloser
    fknloser Male 30-39
    418 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 7:24 am
    the word is A-S-S ! you brits and your stupid version of this word ` A-R-S-E ` .... just say ASS, `arse` sounds stupid, looks stupid and all around just plain stupid.
  46. Profile photo of bored-am-I
    bored-am-I Male 30-39
    785 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 7:31 am
    @alexander_xx

    I once heard Hugh Grant say bugger in a film...no sorry, in all his films.

    13

    Charles: Dear Lord, forgive me for what I am about to, ah, say in this magnificent place of worship... Bugger! Bugger! Bugger, bugger, bugger, bugger!
  47. Profile photo of Handsompod
    Handsompod Male 30-39
    1109 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 7:35 am
    fknloser, ass is a donkey. I sit on my ass with my arse. See not so hard is it? Now stop talking out of your donkey.
  48. Profile photo of conky
    conky Male 30-39
    24 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 7:41 am
    Nah, the word is arse ya tw@....
    Its our language you speak rooster-chops
  49. Profile photo of bhamels
    bhamels Male 30-39
    13 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 7:52 am
    Somebody needs to make an American version of this.
  50. Profile photo of Rufio1980
    Rufio1980 Male 18-29
    11 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 8:41 am
    I see some of our American cousins are having a bit of trouble with British swearing. Don`t imagine Hugh Grant saying these words, try Brick Top out of Snatch. And you`ve never heard swearing as natural as it comes from a proper northerner. If you ever get to hear it from a Barnsley lad, it`s pure poetry.
  51. Profile photo of LookItsLeia
    LookItsLeia Female 13-17
    55 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 10:01 am
    I would hang this in my room
  52. Profile photo of tedgp
    tedgp Male 30-39
    3287 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 10:09 am
    Looks like most of those on that chart were made up.
  53. Profile photo of duffytoler
    duffytoler Male 40-49
    5195 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 10:27 am
    >>Looks like most of those on that chart were made up.

    What are some real ones?
    IAB KILL SWEAR FILTER NAO
  54. Profile photo of starfl4ke
    starfl4ke Female 18-29
    349 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 10:53 am
    Rufio, I couldn`t have explained it better myself :)
  55. Profile photo of alexander_xx
    alexander_xx Male 18-29
    339 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 11:15 am
    hugh grant is nothing to go by when talking about brits, noone here actually likes him,much less talks like him... in fact we think hes a drating idiot that keeps making us look like we cant talk to women without dribbling on ourselves and going into convultions, very inaccurate

    and we very rarely say arse, thanks to americanisation we all also say ass. how do you people still not know this?

    and whilst this chart may have been created by an british company it in no way reflects how the british actually swear. as rufio1980 said, you wanna know how we swear go check out a film by Guy Ritchie or Danny Boyle, those films are about as British as Britain gets!


    about as posh as we get (clip from snatch)
  56. Profile photo of RoboPatton
    RoboPatton Male 30-39
    2424 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 11:28 am
    swearing cant be a science. Its like magic, the force, or religion... Start analyzing too much and it falls apart. Leave my swears alone science!
  57. Profile photo of Nocciolina
    Nocciolina Female 18-29
    1623 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 11:41 am
    Mix this and some of the insults from the "100 best insults" video and you`ve got yourself an unlimited guide to swearing and insulting.
  58. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25420 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 11:57 am
    Wow, i learned something! ublike the table of elements i can use this in day to day life :)
  59. Profile photo of octobers
    octobers Male 18-29
    40 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 12:37 pm
    How is Bs not bullsh*t?
  60. Profile photo of IssaTheFiend
    IssaTheFiend Female 18-29
    2353 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 1:25 pm
    The pissed up section is pretty f*cking nonsensical.
  61. Profile photo of xtreme_dude
    xtreme_dude Male 18-29
    1372 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 2:11 pm
    WHY CAN WE NOT CURSE ON THIS WEBSITE?!
  62. Profile photo of Handsompod
    Handsompod Male 30-39
    1109 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 3:44 pm
    alexander xx, arse is a great word and still very much in use. (It is in our household anyway)

    In celebration of the word arse I propose a Bob Flemming sketch for those unfamiliar.

    Arse!
  63. Profile photo of alexander_xx
    alexander_xx Male 18-29
    339 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 4:49 pm
    @handsompod, good for you man, its how the word should be! :P so long as you dont bring us down by acting like hugh grant im still happy lol

    for the record, any americans watching that clip, its humour based on a sterotype, not a documentary :P
  64. Profile photo of globpharm
    globpharm Male 18-29
    196 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 6:32 pm
    C**t is the most used one around me. I use it at least 15 times a day.
  65. Profile photo of xxPinkxx
    xxPinkxx Female 18-29
    3829 posts
    July 13, 2010 at 10:28 pm
    I hear ya, xtreme_dude. We all hate the swear filter. The best is when you write c o c ktail. it comes out roostertail.
  66. Profile photo of magoo22
    magoo22 Male 30-39
    660 posts
    July 14, 2010 at 5:58 am
    @Hansompod Good one!
  67. Profile photo of DickenMcHunt
    DickenMcHunt Male 18-29
    1299 posts
    July 14, 2010 at 5:58 am
    I wish there was an option in my profile to run swearing on/off...

  68. Profile photo of lukas1051
    lukas1051 Male 18-29
    3426 posts
    July 14, 2010 at 6:38 am
    I`m quite fond of toss and arse.
  69. Profile photo of GreyYes
    GreyYes Female 18-29
    418 posts
    July 14, 2010 at 2:40 pm
    o_O wow a lot of these just seem really stupid
  70. Profile photo of bored-am-I
    bored-am-I Male 30-39
    785 posts
    July 14, 2010 at 4:17 pm
    @alexander_xx

    I hate Hugh Grant too. Still, it was just a response to you saying bugger isn`t a British swear word. I mean, in the Periodic table of swearing there has to be some Noble Gases amongst the more heavy loaded motherf***ers. Even if Helium is a lighter gas than your average C**ksucking fart doens`t make it less valuable in the chart, Alexander A**wipe.

    Still...I do miss the American classic Unclef**ker. Thank you Southpark.
  71. Profile photo of GuardinGnome
    GuardinGnome Male 18-29
    2893 posts
    July 14, 2010 at 10:37 pm
    My favorite is "Christ on a f*cking bike." LOL
  72. Profile photo of geekphr34k
    geekphr34k Male 18-29
    34 posts
    July 16, 2010 at 10:18 pm
    this needs an audio sampler so we can hear our favorite swears pronounced.
  73. Profile photo of kittkatkatie
    kittkatkatie Female 18-29
    109 posts
    July 19, 2010 at 9:27 am
    this is so from the uk. they say arse instead of ass and have more swearwords than us. damn.

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