Lindsay Lohan Sentenced To Jail: Caged Heat!

Submitted by: Swaywithme 7 years ago in Funny

Lohan was sentenced to 90 days in jail and 90 days in rehab for her various infractions. One can only LOL so hard.
There are 113 comments:
Female 914
*cruel Bender laugh ensues*
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Male 378
wow, that`s some really good acting there, lindsay. why wont you put that kind of effort into your work.
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Female 52
doesn`t the judge understand that she is a celebrity and therefore above the law?
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Male 661
I just spent a few minutes thinking about this whole thing. 90 days is nothing. I`ve done it, and it was the best thing to ever happen to me.

Personally I feel pity for her, I really do. Not because of the jail time. She deserves it, and quite frankly needs it. It could be a life changing experience for her, as it was for me.

As Boadicea says, (my paraphrasing), How do you expect to make a silk purse out of a sow`s ear? Without the foundation of a good up bringing, how do you expect her to function as a reasonable adult?
(I do take issue with the "Gross People" comment. The only difference between a lot of them and you is they got caught.)
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Female 1,677
People, jail is not a nice place no matter where you go. So the fact that she cried isn`t weird at all-- I would have. 90 days, a week, it`s still full of gross people and it strips of you of your humanity. That`s what it`s for of course, but still-- unpleasant. I doubt it was acting.

And she comes from a pooty family. Celebrity or not, if your parents are both retards who are in denial and enable and whatthedrateverelse with histories of drug addiction etc. of their own, then she really didn`t have a chance.

She`s like any other screw up from a pooty family, only she has money. I guess because she has money, we`re supposed to bask in her misery? Right, good logic.
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Female 2,352
I can`t believe she cried like that its only 90 days and she probably won`t have to do half of that.
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Female 130
watching horrible people is not entertaining. Enjoying this makes you lamer than she is.
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Male 34
LMFAO. she`s like a 3 year old. it`s drating 90 days. get a grip, not like she doesn`t deserve it.
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Male 255
Schadenfreude makes the world a happier place
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Male 2,056
i can`t really see anyone crying in court as funny seeing as they usually have a reason for it
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Male 2,159
It`s her own fault for getting into drugs in the first place. Why can`t child actors just keep being actors instead of thinking their career is over and smoking themselves stupid?

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Male 34
Had the misfortune of being seated next to the bitch on a cross-country flight a few years back. She truly has an evil soul. Drug addiction defined as a "disease" or not, she has the choice to treat other people like human beings, and refuses to.
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Female 525
The majority of my family has had drug addictions and it`s not an easy thing.. I think those who are laughing at her have not experienced how much drugs can really drat with someone.
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Female 1,211
Stupid bitch deserved it.
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Male 122
yay!
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Male 1,252
WTH its been doctored from the previous feed today O.o why is this one so "pro-lohan" while the previous was raw footage and lame acting to reduce her sentence?
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Male 415
Judge doesnt give a sh*t
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Female 131
Idiot could have killed someone. She got what she deserved.
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Male 1,193
God damn lindsay lohan has a hard life.
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Male 272
kill it. kill it with fire.
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Male 914
someone should make a video game starring Lindsey Lohan and call it Pirate Hooker Island
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Male 877
booo f u c k i n g hoo...so what?....move on!
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Female 683
I don`t find the degradation of a person amusing, but she deserves to go to jail.
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Male 350
yes, I laughed
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Male 247
yay
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Female 895
Waaaaaooooww what a suprise..:/
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Male 236
She started crying XD
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Male 226
When you break the law, you go to jail. YAAAAAAAY
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Male 1,299
Like She Didn`t See This Coming? Tard.
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Male 25,417
The fact she had the nerve to act that she was sad. That annoyed the judge, but she also had nail polish on her fingers saying f u c k!
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Male 12,138
Baaaawwwwww of the Day?
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Male 5,194
>>huge whole in her sole where

LOL - you mean "hole in her soul"? STILL dumb!
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Female 536
That would have been more insulting if you could SPELL right.
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Female 857
Lindsay Lohan has a huge whole in her sole where her parents love should be. Poor kid never stood a chance, hopefully the only way is up.
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Male 39,614
"Like a thief who was caught. Not a bit sorry they stole but terribly, terribly sorry he`s going to jail." - Rhett Butler
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Male 491
Who really cares?Is there not alot more important isuses in the world than this bloody canoe!
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Female 112
She needs to spend the WHOLE time in jail, none of this stupid get out early crap like what happened with Paris Hilton. She made the choice to do what she did. Serve out your sentence and deal with it.
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Male 2,424
The fact that your lawyer already had some tissue out for you shoulda been the first sign!
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Male 770
I just cant feel sorry for celebs. They get billions just to wink at a camera and they think that gives them permission to do anything laws be damned. She was warned, she knew the consequences of ditching those court ordered classes. I know I would never get a free pass.
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Male 2,148
mithraela: No, people don`t hate her just because she`s a celebrity. People hate her because she does stupid poo like drive drunk and violate parole. She`s a stupid bitch with no self-control, and that isn`t because her life is as public as it is.
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Female 535
If it weren`t Lindsay Lohan, this schit wouldn`t even be a blip on the radar. This stuff is way too common, and I`ve yet to live in an area where what Lindsay is doing is very small cookies and quite insignificant. I think she probably has a harder time dealing with the ignorant public, than she has dealing with the drugs. I think all the people who actually hate Lindsay and other celebrities like her, should try being public domain for a little while. Maybe you wouldn`t make the same choices, but I`m sure life would be more of a bitch than you planned for. I think that losing the right to tell everybody to phuck off and leave me alone would be enough to drive it home a bit.
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Male 26
Anyone who believes these tears has forgotten that she`s a PROFESSIONAL ACTRESS.

No pity.
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Female 4,039
@Madest - she violated her probation. That`s why she`s going to jail.
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Female 56
she was such a cute little girl. It is so sad the path she has chosen to take
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Female 1,006
Finally. Maybe now she will realize that she is not above the law.
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Female 305
ive actually been following this story on tmz for a while now. first she got sum DUIs, they found cocaine in her pocket, she didnt attend the classes she was supposed to attend to keep out of jail, then she drank a bunch when she was on probation with the SCRAM bracelet. What the hell did you expect?!? DUH!
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Male 798
@madest: Yes you`re allowed to drink yourself to the grave as long as you`re not out on the roads getting into accidents.
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Male 7,378
@ Swaywithme, Sounds more like vindictive law based upon celebrity jealousy than it does American justice. Here in America you`re supposed to be allowed to drink yourself into an early grave. She hasn`t killed anybody. Jail is supposed to be reserved for criminals not petulant children.
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Male 282
I dont feel sorry for people who are famous for being a phucking idiot. makes no sense why this girl even gets the attention she does.
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Female 3,696
I can`t find another 5:00 clip just yet but Perez has the longer videos on his site

10:00 clip
Lohan`s Plea to the Jude on Perez

10:00 clip
Lohan gets Sentenced
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Female 3,696
As if an ignition lock would stop Lohan- really? She has the resources and the `friends` that will hand her the keys to any car that she wants. That`s the thing- as a privileged celebrity, typical probation just doesn`t work! Lindsay set off her SCRAM anklet twice and managed to get her way out of it both times. Someone spilled a drink? Yeah right...your exotic TEA activated it? Bull.

I understand the frustration with using resources for this but she still broke the law- she still needs to own up to her actions. I`d hate to see them let her off because of finances and see her kill somebody- or herself. She needs a mad wakeup call.
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Male 1,351
Copyright claim...anyone know where the video can be found now?
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Male 663
it`s 90 days for drunk driving. big whoop. you can get several years if you`re a repeat offender. she`s just a little puss bag.
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Male 510
@ginying i dont care if you are a spambot, no one should be this drating stupid. your facts are 100% wrong. in fact, sunglasses actually dilate your pupils, allowing for more UV rays to enter your eyes. So sunglasses actually make UV damage much worse.

in summary:
you`re a bot maybe?
you`re retarded.
drat you.
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Male 7,378
Nothing an ignition interlock can`t fix. Besides California is broke. They`re going to milk the taxpayer to teach Lindsay a lesson? That might seem OK to you but to me it`s wrong. The government is not supposed to act like our mommy.
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Female 3,696
@ madest

Drunk driving doesn`t hurt society? Just because she hasn`t killed someone YET? Is that how we look at it?
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Female 3,696
@Why the hell is this funny???

It`s mostly funny because Lindsay Lohan was completely assured that she is above the law. Her sentence was way lighter than anybody else`s should have been in this situation but still she actually had a party planned tonight assuming that everything was going to be OK.

LaLocaLohan isn`t in a bad situation here. Most women in the facility she`ll be going to usually only have to complete about 25% of their sentences so -23 days ish? Two movies she`s been tapped to do have both come out publicly saying they are willing to hold filming for her to finish her in-treatment.

I`m laughing because her mother and hers stance is "This is unfair- I do not deserve jail time" Never mind that she has various infractions-fled the country to avoid her warrant to go drink in Cannes and got her dentist to prescribe her Dilaudid(similar 2 methadone & heroin) for WISDOM TEETH.

Maybe this will finally straighten her out.
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Male 7,378
She deserves to do what she wants to do. In fact she`s earned it. If she was any other person she would not spend a minute in jail. Her crimes are petty and haven`t hurt society at all.
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Male 263
4 words..serves the bitch right.
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Male 17,512
She deserves every minute of those 90 days (and more), Sadly she`ll only spend 1/4 of that time behind bars.
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Female 4,039
I didn`t feel like watching that, cuz I saw it last night on some dumb show - did it mention that she had F**k You painted on one of her fingernails? Classy.
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Male 5,314
so she`ll actually do a a week or two, and then go right back to coke.
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Male 39,614
to all the bleeding hearts who don`t think this is funny I say "blah, blah, blah"

LyLo`s problem isnt` drug addition... it`s lack of discipline. She`s just another spoiled celebretard. If she was addicted before she was famous I`d be willing to buy into the bleeding heart crapola, but she wasn`t
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Male 1,222
Fck her
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Male 503
i hope she becomes someone bitch for 90 days
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Male 355
the Judge should have order 90day acting class, and a public apology to everyone that has seen any one her movies after 2004.
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Female 23
HAHA. this shows that she`s a good actress for making that speech. Too bad it didn`t work. lol
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Female 1,515
I find it a little amusing how shocked she was. I`m glad she`s getting solid consequences for her actions, though I`m sure they`d be more severe for a normal joe, at least they`re something. Hopefully she can recover from this hole she`s in. I wish her the best.
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Male 716
And suck it up Lohan
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Male 716
ginying you advertising nub!
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Male 587
Really you feel bad for her? What about the people who had hard lives and drove drunk or got addicted to drugs then broke the law. You feel bad for them too? She did the crime and now she is trying to use her fame to get he out of it. I do not nor will I ever feel bad for any celebrity that gets their self into trouble. They have it better then 90% of the population they get no pity from me.
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Male 317
quote from the sheriffs spokesperson "generally, a female inmate in Lindsay`s situation only serves 25% of their sentence"

Stop crying bitch, you got lucky.....
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Male 69
She`ll be out in 30 days or so
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Male 587
Does she really think she will trick anyone with her crying? She is an actress we all know that is what she does for a living. Obviously she was not very convincing acting classes may be needed.
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Male 975
news like this doesnt make me laugh but it does make me smh
too bad she doesnt have the support to help her kick the habit and stay off
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Male 5,189
Wewt!!! Eat it!
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Male 44
OH My God! 30 days for each DUI? cry me a river you dirty slut! You`d be in jail for overa year if you lived in Virginia. Mean Girls 2: Prison Bitches will start filming soon.
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Male 737
whatever... I actually feel bad for her. Drug and alcohol abuse and addiction, combined with the insanity of being a celebrity, have completely ruined what should have been an awesome life. She never had a chance... a lot of people ragging her would have ended up in the same spot.
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Female 3,574
It`s really gross and sad at the same time that so many celebrities are this f*cked up.
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Male 959
Even as she was making her statment it was clear she was not aware how serious the situation was or how seriously she should have taken the probation. I don`t think its funny. But at the same time I think she had thought it was all a bit of a joke. And her reaction on hearing the news showed she really did think she was a special case who should be treated differently to everyone else.
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Male 255
Bravo....bravo...she almost convinced me that was real.
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Female 2,509
On the news the reporter compared her to great actors like Robert Downey Jr blah blah blah. Lindsey Lohan - great actor? FAIL
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Male 1,287
they`re all penitent before the judge. Too little, too late.
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Male 34
She will probably be released early, just like Paris Hilton was long ago.
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Male 193
She`s an actor ffs. Stop taking her drama so seriously.
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Female 798
@Bridge
so you were a spoiled little snot who thought they were above the law and thought crying a couple tears would get you out of anything and was surprised when people stopped falling for it? Celebrities getting much deserved jail time after eluding it for so long is always funny.
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Female 1
Why the hell is this funny??? There are people like this everywhere, who have messed up their lives and can`t get things back together. It`s tragic and heartbreaking for them. You wouldn`t laugh at anyone else. Because she`s famous, people post her worst life events all over the internet and berate her for her decisions. You don`t know what she`s been through, and it`s none of your business. I feel really bad for such a terrible thing happening to a young woman with so much potential.
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Male 29
She`s going to be Jenna Maroney in 15 years.
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Male 914
boo hoo hoo
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Male 876
Go here and scroll down a little to see her little message to the judge... HAHAHAHA! Backfire!

Lindsay in Court
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Male 2,549
Alas! I am an innocent victim, it is the fault of someone else that has put me in this unfortunate situation, blah blah blah.
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Male 931
90 day. Could have been worse.
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Female 125
Once you see family go through this, any form of Jail-time isn`t funny at all. I`ve been dealing with issues such as this from a young age, it has never been funny.
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Female 1,798
@ boNeymiZz:

I feel the saaaaame way. Lindsay Lohan is nothing to admire--she`s an alcoholic skank who needs to just be ignored. for a very long time.
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Male 249
I`d bang her.
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Male 1,083
D.=
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Male 7,378
Gee thankyou judge for saving the world from photos of a drunken, pantyless Lohan passed out on her star on the hollywood walk of fame. I feel so much safer.
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Female 27
I dont understand how this is funny, shes human.
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Male 237
wait wait..... you mean to tell me this thing is still ALIVE?
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Female 255
Guess her schedule is gonna be full for the next 6 months or so...
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Female 122
I don`t see why anyone would laugh over this. Regardless of wether she is a "celebrity" or not and you for some twisted reason feel justice is being served, this is just a video of a girl getting her life ripped apart for the next 6 months. How is that entertainment?

Anyone who has had to watch a loved one go though this knows this is not something we as a society should be taking lightly. Her drunken behavior and people willing and excited to post videos like this for fun is what`s wrong with this country.
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Male 6,694
She used to be so cute and innocent. Now she is just a fellon. Like father like doughter.
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Male 4,745
I think it`s sad. Not funny. Substance addiction is a terrible thing. She very unfortunate to have to suffer from it while the whole world sits back and judges her.

Hopefully the 90 days and the court appointed therapist will help her this time.
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Male 230
90 days in hollywood jail= easy. Now I would like to see spend just 24 hours in cook county jail.
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Male 4,807
And the Oscar goes to.........
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Male 15,510
They need to lock all Hollywood too then
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Male 39,614
well, she`s a lesbian so at least she`ll have plenty of dating oportunities while she`s in there.

Perhaps Martha Stewart can give her tips on how to decorate her cell with artwork she macrama`d from toilet paper and hair clippings.

She also might learn some new career skills from the hardened criminals. Let`s face it, she hasn`t got an acting career.
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Female 397
did she say "doing her best to balance jobs and screwing up". DOH!
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Female 6
It`s true that she got herself into this situation but it`s really just sad to watch her downward spiral.
And I would cry too if I were in her situation, but I`m glad she got the 90 days. She doesn`t deserve special treatment or exemption for being Lindsay Lohan.
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Female 386
It`s 90 damn days, she needs to get over it lol... Her crying is so annoying!!
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Male 5
Wow, to think some artist use jail time for song writing. In her case her songs will be given to justin bieber once she is locked up lolz
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Female 3,696
Link: Lindsay Lohan Sentenced To Jail: Caged Heat! [Rate Link] - Lohan was sentenced to 90 days in jail and 90 days in rehab for her various infractions. One can only LOL so hard.
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