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Category: Funny
Date: 06/17/10 10:03 AM

67 Responses to How To Give Yourself LASIK Surgery [Pic]

  1. Profile photo of fancylad
    fancylad Male 30-39
    18502 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:15 am
    Link: How To Give Yourself LASIK Surgery - You`re only three steps away from a life of clear sightedness.
  2. Profile photo of kitka_1994
    kitka_1994 Male 13-17
    85 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:19 am
    Why does Jimmy Car need laser eye surgery?
  3. Profile photo of TheSharpest
    TheSharpest Male 18-29
    1768 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:24 am
    Hey! I came up with this idea, I`m not even kidding, and submitted it as a mock invention in my English class back when I was in highschool. Someone`s spying me and stealing my ideas, creepy.
  4. Profile photo of Mitico
    Mitico Male 18-29
    45 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:27 am
    And what was the point of all of this exactly? O_o
  5. Profile photo of pui
    pui Female 18-29
    3575 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:28 am
    ...... wha?
  6. Profile photo of deltaumarcus
    deltaumarcus Male 18-29
    1958 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:29 am
    .....
  7. Profile photo of Ricgus3
    Ricgus3 Male 18-29
    62 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:33 am
    Okay, cannot wait for the statistic showing how many people lost there sight cause they failed doing this the right way!
  8. Profile photo of Nocciolina
    Nocciolina Female 18-29
    1623 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:37 am
    Meh.
  9. Profile photo of dave32891
    dave32891 Male 18-29
    542 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:45 am
    I think I`m going to head to the lost and found to try and find the point of that
  10. Profile photo of canusuck
    canusuck Male 30-39
    777 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:04 am
    I LOL`d, reminded me of Napoleon Dynamite with the "time machine"...
  11. Profile photo of peloos12
    peloos12 Male 18-29
    3825 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:08 am
    I think we`re missing a very important part of this joke.
  12. Profile photo of nakoninja
    nakoninja Male 18-29
    354 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:16 am
    @ dave while you are there try to find your joke as well
  13. Profile photo of pizzabob18
    pizzabob18 Male 18-29
    366 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:18 am
    ...mmmkay.....
  14. Profile photo of meepmaker
    meepmaker Male 30-39
    6694 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:22 am
    I dont think so
  15. Profile photo of a1butcher
    a1butcher Male 40-49
    4812 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:27 am
    I was looking for the funny punch line. Didn`t find it, so I looked again and still haven`t found it?

    Maybe it somewhere in the comments? Mmm, Nope not there either!
  16. Profile photo of Trollinhomes
    Trollinhomes Male 18-29
    81 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:36 am
    i dont get the joke.
  17. Profile photo of TheTumor
    TheTumor Male 18-29
    552 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:38 am
    The joke is "Go burn your drating eye out, dumbasses."
  18. Profile photo of mamerv
    mamerv Male 18-29
    328 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:45 am
    I think the joke is the painless procedure part I mean it has an * after it.......
  19. Profile photo of TxP
    TxP Female 70 & Over
    1192 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:47 am
    -TheTumor
    really? you`re gonna try and back up a pointless joke and try to insult everyone else?
    you must be the life of the party :P
  20. Profile photo of deathxtra
    deathxtra Male 13-17
    2791 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:49 am
    I don`t get it.
  21. Profile photo of Gerry1of1
    Gerry1of1 Male 50-59
    36219 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:50 am
    is there a joke here somewhere?
  22. Profile photo of DeathToLems
    DeathToLems Female 18-29
    1435 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:51 am
    that dog looks like he knows what he userly gets up to when he puts a do not disturb sign outside his door
  23. Profile photo of uhmerikin
    uhmerikin Male 18-29
    876 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:54 am
    I don`t think there is a joke here, it is just a stupid cartoon.
  24. Profile photo of TheTumor
    TheTumor Male 18-29
    552 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:55 am
    TxP- I wasnt calling anyone a dumbass other than the dumbasses that would try this proceedure at home.
    Try instigating and taking things literal elswhere. And stop taking everything posted on this site so serious.
  25. Profile photo of kimkio
    kimkio Female 18-29
    878 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:57 am
    i neeeeeeeeeeeed itttttttttt!!!

  26. Profile photo of campofclay
    campofclay Male 30-39
    177 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 12:05 pm
    not funny. I get it, but it lacks what the French call `je ne sais humor`
  27. Profile photo of Mantolwen
    Mantolwen Female 18-29
    387 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 12:27 pm
    I got a sight test at a place that offers laser eye surgery, but despite the fact I`m not eligible for it because my eyesight hasn`t settled yet, they keep trying to get me to take it. I think they`re trying to rip me off. Wouldn`t mind LASIK though. Want to see properly!
  28. Profile photo of samidoll
    samidoll Female 18-29
    616 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 12:45 pm
    can you see the laser when you get lasik? also, does it hurt? anybody who has had it, weigh on in
  29. Profile photo of IssaTheFiend
    IssaTheFiend Female 18-29
    2354 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 12:55 pm
    I need Lasik but I find the "hold very f*cking still while this laser hits you in the eye don`t worry its painless" part scary. XD
  30. Profile photo of Guvax
    Guvax Male 18-29
    25 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 12:56 pm
    A friend of mine got lasik. said the procedure is painless and all he saw was a bright light...next few days were horrible though, he couldnt see or open his eyes at all because they hurt so bad. They have to cut back a flap of your eye so they can get right in there with the laser, and the healing time is not fun. But he has 15-20 vision now (i think)!
  31. Profile photo of sulfox
    sulfox Male 13-17
    15 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 12:58 pm
    Could someone explain this?

    If not, this has to be THE WORST joke I`ve ever seen.
  32. Profile photo of Raokin
    Raokin Female 18-29
    456 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 1:02 pm
    Guvax, your friend must not have had a very good doctor, then. My eyes didn`t hurt at all after or during lasik (they give you lots of numbing drops). It was just a pain having to use all those drops and not being able to rub your eyes for a month afterwards.
  33. Profile photo of southernboy
    southernboy Male 13-17
    132 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 1:22 pm
    There`s a much easier way to do this
    1. Get contact lenses
    2. Put them in your eye
    3. That`s it!
  34. Profile photo of Angelmassb
    Angelmassb Male 18-29
    15511 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm
    Looks legit to me
  35. Profile photo of frogyhead
    frogyhead Male 30-39
    63 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 1:39 pm
    For anybody planning on getting it in the future, if you pay close attention you can smell you eye burning. I got my eyes zapped about a year ago and my vision is now 20/15. There was no pain. And you don`t have to worry about sitting still. You do have to sit still, but the computer that tracks your eye prevents anything from going wrong if you move, so you don`t have to worry about it.
  36. Profile photo of starfl4ke
    starfl4ke Female 18-29
    349 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 1:53 pm
    Can someone please give me *serious* information on what happens during lasik, you know, what they have to do, healing etc. I`m really interested in having it but I`d rather listen to people who`ve actually had it that the optician..
  37. Profile photo of TxP
    TxP Female 70 & Over
    1192 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:11 pm
    TheTumor- im not trying to instigate anything, it sounded like you were, it was a mistake but hey, thats why they say most communication is done through body language,my bad. and since when do i take things seriously on here? its all in good fun
  38. Profile photo of grahamm
    grahamm Male 18-29
    249 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:12 pm
    starfl4ke, i had it done just less than a year ago.
    they basically peel back the top layer of your eye, put some crap in there so you cant feel anything and all you can see is a blurry flashing light which you`re meant to look at (this is the laser that is currently raping your eye). they make it so you cant blink and all that and the whole procedure takes about 10 minutes. then you have 3 eye drops youve gotta keep taking for a while, one makes your vision cloudy and one is just fake tears to stop your eyes going dry. yu sleep with some goggle-shades things too for a week. and shower with swimming goggles on. basically treat your eyes like they got a sharp knife against your sack. oh yeah and after the surgery get home asap and go to bed cos after about an hour it hurts like so much to keep your eyes open. happened to me half way through the train journey. also dont do it with optical express because they keep sending you letters after with useless vouchers.
  39. Profile photo of grahamm
    grahamm Male 18-29
    249 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:13 pm
    but yeah my visions really sexy now :)
  40. Profile photo of Altaru
    Altaru Male 18-29
    3483 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:37 pm
    starfl4ke

    Here`s a video of what they do during lasik.

    I haven`t had it done, but apparently during the procedure it doesn`t hurt much.
  41. Profile photo of OmgZelda
    OmgZelda Female 18-29
    1593 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:40 pm
    Can someone please give me *serious* information on what happens during lasik, you know, what they have to do, healing etc. I`m really interested in having it but I`d rather listen to people who`ve actually had it that the optician..

    ---

    I`ve seen it done.

    They numb your eye, slice open your eye with a little razor, push back the little apart that was sliced, stick a contact lens (pretty much what it is) in the little hole in your eye, push the little flap back over and you`re done.

    The slicing your eye with a razor is exactly why I am NEVER getting this done.

    And I like my glasses.
  42. Profile photo of Raokin
    Raokin Female 18-29
    456 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:46 pm
    "They numb your eye, slice open your eye with a little razor, push back the little apart that was sliced, stick a contact lens (pretty much what it is) in the little hole in your eye, push the little flap back over and you`re done."

    Umm, you do know lasik involves using lasers to reashape the cornea? No razors or lenses involved. Maybe you`re thinking of a different procedure.

    Also, before you get it done, they put you in a very cold room with a shiny metallic blanket that looks like it belongs on the space station. Periodically people will come in to give you a series of drops until you`re ready.
  43. Profile photo of Raokin
    Raokin Female 18-29
    456 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 2:51 pm
    Oh, and I think pretty much everyone who gets it sees halos and fuzziness around lights at night. I definitely do, but it`s not bad and totally worth not having to deal with contacts or glasses.
  44. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25408 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 3:05 pm
    O dear! that could end badly!
  45. Profile photo of addler
    addler Male 13-17
    778 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 3:44 pm
    "And I like my glasses."

    GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK
  46. Profile photo of Altaru
    Altaru Male 18-29
    3483 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 3:52 pm
    Umm, you do know lasik involves using lasers to reashape the cornea? No razors or lenses involved. Maybe you`re thinking of a different procedure.

    Watch the video I posted earlier.

    There`s more than one way that surgeons do lasik, and most of them involve cutting away the layer with a razor. There are other, slightly more expensive options that involve the use of a second laser to cut it, but both work the same way. Cut away the layer over the eye, use a special laser to re-shape the cornea, replace the layer.

    There`s no way to do it without cutting away the layer, by the way, because then the laser would just burn out your vision completely.

    ALSO, there`s another version that`s relatively new that involves the placement of a contact-like lens under the layer that works, wouldn`t you know it, like a contact lens.

    Then, there`s PRK, which you`re probably thinking of.

    (cont.)
  47. Profile photo of Dr_Sexy
    Dr_Sexy Male 30-39
    1597 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 3:53 pm
    after they`ve laser sliced your cornea, they remove the sliver from your eyeball.
  48. Profile photo of Altaru
    Altaru Male 18-29
    3483 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 3:57 pm
    It`s the older style, and uses a different laser that instead burns away a thin layer of the eye`s covering, which eventually grows back, in the process of re-shaping the eye.

    Also, PRK takes a longer time to fully heal, and tends to be more uncomfortable.

    In case you can`t tell, I`ve been studying up on this stuff. Despite knowing the risks and how it`s done, I`m seriously considering it...
  49. Profile photo of Qwertyuiop95
    Qwertyuiop95 Male 18-29
    215 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 6:15 pm
    The sad thing is, it`s real.

    http://www.lasikathome.com/
  50. Profile photo of inaria
    inaria Female 18-29
    1515 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 6:26 pm
    That looks super safe!
  51. Profile photo of tonkin25
    tonkin25 Male 13-17
    10 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 7:21 pm
    i love the * after painless procedure
  52. Profile photo of xXamwxxXx
    xXamwxxXx Male 18-29
    285 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 7:30 pm
    I watched my dad get lasik. They cut his eye open with a razor blade and reshaped it with a laser. It was sick but now I want it. They had the whole procedure on a monitor so i could watch it in the next room. I dont know about this home lasik kit though.
  53. Profile photo of Sillabub_0
    Sillabub_0 Female 13-17
    160 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 7:32 pm
    Hoax
  54. Profile photo of Dstructur
    Dstructur Male 18-29
    13 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 7:45 pm
    it comes with a quickstart guide too. you know in case u couldnt be drated reading ALL the instructions before you attempt a professional medical procedure on yourself...
  55. Profile photo of DarkFerret
    DarkFerret Male 18-29
    2750 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 7:52 pm
    wuts the "*" by painless procedure??
  56. Profile photo of Fml
    Fml Male 30-39
    233 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 8:18 pm
    6 years ago they had a health fare for employees of the company I work for. I had Lasik surgery paid on cheap installments deducted from my paycheck for 3 years. 18 months later I was back using glasses. Now I cannot use contacts nor have another surgery. So there you go if it’s too good to be true probably is.
  57. Profile photo of Qwertyuiop95
    Qwertyuiop95 Male 18-29
    215 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 8:32 pm
    I`m almost glad this is a hoax. No, not almost, completely.
  58. Profile photo of CodeJockey
    CodeJockey Male 40-49
    5607 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 10:26 pm
    "...Now I cannot use contacts nor have another surgery..."
    I don`t know anyone that had the surgery and doesn`t still wear glasses.
    Most people that have seem to claim that the new prescription is not as strong but, I don`t think it`s worth it if I still end up buying yet another pair of glasses.
  59. Profile photo of henryhendrix
    henryhendrix Male 30-39
    722 posts
    June 17, 2010 at 11:16 pm
    Ohhh I get it now. This was really helpful! Well, I`m going to go get my LASIK home kit now!
  60. Profile photo of handys003
    handys003 Male 50-59
    2402 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 1:22 am
    Note to some dimwit out there. Please do not try this at home. Cause you know somewhere someone will take this serious.
  61. Profile photo of darkmoth
    darkmoth Male 18-29
    69 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 3:28 am
    thad be hella cool tho lol
  62. Profile photo of Saskuel
    Saskuel Male 13-17
    343 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 4:02 am
    oh, well i see where i screwed up now.
    on another note though, my lazer eye surgery guy was wearing glasses. no joke even.
  63. Profile photo of MEZA
    MEZA Male 18-29
    333 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 6:31 am
    handys003
    Male, 40-49, Western US
     127 Posts Friday, June 18, 2010 1:22:45 AM
    Note to some dimwit out there. Please do not try this at home. Cause you know somewhere someone will take this serious.



    I wish I would have read that comment thirty minutes earlier...
  64. Profile photo of TheTumor
    TheTumor Male 18-29
    552 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 12:57 pm
    txp-
    "`assume` makes an ass out of `U` and and `Me`."
    Just figured you took things super serious on the internet to have taken what I said so widely out of context.
  65. Profile photo of Trumple07
    Trumple07 Male 13-17
    422 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 3:37 pm
    Damn..its harder than it says on here :(
  66. Profile photo of syke22
    syke22 Male 18-29
    1136 posts
    June 18, 2010 at 8:53 pm
    Dammit, I blinked... now I have cancer..
  67. Profile photo of BunnyNaku
    BunnyNaku Female 18-29
    5224 posts
    August 6, 2010 at 4:06 am
    >.0

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