Another Church Marquee Tells it Like it Is [Pic]

Submitted by: peloos12 7 years ago in Funny

Finally, a message from the church we can ALL agree on.
There are 96 comments:
Male 999
something`s fishy...
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Male 2,085
Sorry Moefreak, had to check out your profile. A bisexual liberal atheist. WOW! But you do like The Simpsons, so you can`t be all bad.
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Male 999
something`s fishy...
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Male 999
something`s fishy...
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Female 257
Natural selection doesn`t work fast enough.
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Male 12,365
[quote]true true true true. i see people swerve on the highway and instead of thinking "drunk" now, i think "texting". just as dangerous, if not more so.[/quote]

Studies place driving while speaking on a mobile phone on a par with driving while drunk over the limit. That`s just talking on a phone. Texting is much worse.

Do it often enough and someone is going to die.
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Female 614
true true true true. i see people swerve on the highway and instead of thinking "drunk" now, i think "texting". just as dangerous, if not more so.
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Male 108
This same thing was actually on a local church recently as well. It goes up there with another sign I saw that said "God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts." Both made me smile.
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Male 12,365
Thanks for the reply, fudgeechidna. Looks like it isn`t as clear-cut as I thought it was. Maybe a limited degree of conscious multitasking might be possible for certain combinations of tasks.
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Female 1,963
SCfan, I`m not British.

Although I must say, if one half of a whole country finds you unfunny, perhaps you are. Not a jab, just an observation on my part.
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Female 1,199
Hah clever....
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Male 577
"Texting while driving couldn`t be that much less safe than reading long signs while driving."

Are you serious?
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Male 1,195
Linkenberger, I forgot about that, it`s back now. :-)
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Male 1,164
Ben what ever happened to your House profile pic? It made me laugh every time I saw it...

I once saw a car go right through a red light; didn`t even slow down. I caught up to the car to see who was driving and it was some teenage wench texting. She doesn`t deserve to meet Jesus.
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Male 2,085
Moefreak must be British. British girls have never liked my sense of humor. Not a jab, just an observation on my part.
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Male 17,511
davymid: As I corrected earlier turbotong`s profile mentions he is a Christian. Therefore he does believe as I do, He was just mistaken.

You decided to jump on that and turned it into a diatribe about me, Yet again.
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Male 1,195
Jesus won`t return my texts.
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Male 1,678
Texting while driving couldn`t be that much less safe than reading long signs while driving.
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Male 1,164
so texting whilst driving is a loophole in the bible? and i can do what i want aslong as i text whilst i drive? SWEET!!!!
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Male 12,138
[quote]The longer an atheist argues with someone, the higher the probability he will resort to an ad hominem attack centered on evolution. [/quote]
Wait, wat? All I did was to call out Crakrjak on his bullsh*t of "correcting" [sic] another user who happens not to share his particular set of religious beliefs. Namely that every human on earth would some day have to answer to Jesus Christ.

I didn`t bring up evolution, he did. In case you missed it, it was in the post before he brought up Hitler.

But yeah, Baal has a point. It`s a joke FFS.
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Male 4,546
drat some of you people must be absolute hell to live with.

"Daddy tell me about Goldilocks"
"SHE ISN`T REAL! drat YOU! BEARS DON`T SPEAK!"
"Ok what about the tortoise and the ha..."
"THE HARE WOULD WIN! THEY DON`T COMMUNICATE!"

drat sake. It`s a joke.

"Three Rabbis walk into a bar..."
"WHICH BAR?! VALIDATE YOUR CLAIMS!!!"

Seriously. drat.
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Male 1,351
Haha, nice message.
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Male 1,623
You can`t meet a historical figure that has been dead for 2000 years. Even less if you are dead.
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Male 40,560
If you think it`s safe to text while driving...go right ahead.

Getting yourself killed saves us the trouble of weeding you out of the gene pool.
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Male 723
"It is up to them to to answer before their gods. It is up to us to arrange the meeting." - Warrior`s credo.

LJ
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Male 41
elkingo;
I love how the name of the law you based that on is called Godwin`s Law.

What do you call this one, though?
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Male 244
I want to see Deuteronomy 23:1 posted on a billboard in front of a church: "No one whose testicles are crushed or whose male organ is cut off shall enter the assembly of the Lord."
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Male 2,159
I want that on a T-Shirt. And on billboards in cities. And a bumper stic- actually no. I draw the line at bumper stickers.
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Male 298
why do people think Evolution is anti-religion.... the church has openly accepted darwinism since 1972, but with the provision that it is the work of a God, the only reason that any church group would now deny evolution is an attempt by it`s dishonest leaders to control the congregation. Funnily enough hardcore muslim fundamentalists also belive in creationism, so the angry right wing creationists have a whole lot more in common with the Taliban, for instance, than they do with the average western church-goer.
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Male 5,620
I think in my adventures in forum land, there is a new law I have discovered.

The longer an atheist argues with someone, the higher the probability he will resort to an ad hominem attack centered on evolution.
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Male 5,620
ha @ picture


lol @ the ridiculous conversation between davy and crakr
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Male 9
@Angilion: Iv read the provided link but the findings represented there could be explained by a faster color perception than character recognition at least the findings of the experiment conducted. The rest is just anecdotal.

I put this to you could moving your arm while closing your fingers be considered multitasking? If not then what division is required for the tasks being performed simultaneously to be separate tasks?

I`ve had a look at current academic papers and there is allot on the subject many of which are in support of the idea of cognitive multitasking for example "Threaded Cognition: An Integrated Theory of Concurrent Multitasking" by Dario D. Salvucci.
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Male 17,511
fudgeechidna: Davymid decided to divert the topic onto criticism of me. I suggest you file your complaints to him about it.
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Male 12,365
fudgeechidna:

That`s why I took care to repeatedly write `conscious thought` in the next post. Humans do multitask numerous things that don`t need any conscious thought (at least 7 sensory input streams, moving, heartbeat, breathing, etc), but not conscious thought.

There`s a brief non-scientific summary here:

summary

You can track back to some of the original research from the names of the people who did it.

The bottom line is essentially that different tasks involving conscious thought must at least partially use the same part of the brain, which can`t happen at the same time.
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Male 9
@CrakrJak: I ask you does Hitler really have any relevance to the current topic? Other than proving Godwin`s law it seems like your purposely trying to derail the discussion, Please drop it.
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Male 17,511
davymid: My opinions and beliefs are not subject to whims such as popularity. I simply don`t care about popularity.

Hitler was rather popular too, A lot of evil things have been done because of `popularity`.
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Male 9
@Angilion: I would dare say that is incorrect we multitask quite well, breathing, heartbeat, processing visual information admittedly these aren`t conscious processes or at least most aren`t but honestly how can you justify saying the brain can`t multitask? I`m not condoning drive-by-texts but what evidence is there for the so called one track mind?
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Male 12,365
[quote]lots of people, believe it or not, still have 1-track minds[/quote]

All humans have 1-track minds. All conscious thought is serial, all of it. Humans can`t consciously multi-task at all, because we lack parallel processing for conscious thought. Instead, we time-slice to create an illusion of multi-tasking. A person might appear to be doing several conscious thought tasks simultaneously, but what they`re actually doing is flicking between the tasks. Which is fine in many cases, but not when lack of attention can kill other people.
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Male 12,365
[quote]I don`t agree with that. texting while driving is easy. If you can`t do it you are about as useful as a monkey.[/quote]

Many people who drive while drunk think it`s easy to drive while drunk and/or that they can do it because they`re special.

Like you, they`re wrong.

I chose driving while drunk deliberately because it`s about as dangerous as driving while texting. They diminish your attention to driving by about the same amount, albeit in different ways.

You probably think you can multi-task. You can`t. No-one can.

You also appear to think you have additional independently focusing eyes, so you can watch your phone with one set while watching the road with the other.
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Male 12,138
CrakrJak, I`m afraid my friend, that your disbelief in lies such as Evolution, might just get you eaten alive. That`s education for ya. It`s a dangerous business, it really is.

I suggest we sit tight and see what the commuity has to say. Anyone?
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Male 17,511
Davymid: [quote]Weren`t you just telling me earlier today how you`ve never evangelised?[/quote]

I said that "I don`t believe that I`ve ever `evangelized`. I`ve never knocked door-to-door giving people tracts or tried to convert anyone.

If simply `relaying information` to a non-believer is evangelizing then you and others here have done the same with your beliefs in evolution and atheism.
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Male 17,511
Davymid:
member profile: turbotong
Occupation: Engineer
City: Plano
State/Province: TX
Marital Status: Single
Sexual Preference: Straight
Religion: Christian
Politics: Conservative

I was correcting a Christian, Not a Non-Christian.

Once again you miss the mark.
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Male 298
Saw this, so while driving the other day, I texted Jesus, saying, "hey, ya wanna meet up?", he never replied, so this sign is rubbish..... went and spent the night doing tequila with lucifer and the reanimated corpse of Aleister Crowley... shazamm
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Female 1,283
Rofl at this sign.
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Male 3,631
I think you two need marriage counseling.
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Male 2,591
if you crash while texting you`re not doing it right
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Male 15,832
Only problem with this is that people who text while driving are all going straight to hell.
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Male 2,748
good sign... true sign
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Male 12,138
[quote]davymid: It was stated that some would meet him and others wouldn`t. Excuse me if I made a correction based on that.[/quote]
I must apologise. You were merely correcting a non-Christian. The Oxford Dictionary of English defines Evangelism as "the practice of relaying information about a particular set of beliefs to others who do not hold those beliefs."

Deeply sorry to have accused you of such a heinous crime.
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Male 17,511
davymid: It was stated that some would meet him and others wouldn`t. Excuse me if I made a correction based on that.
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Male 29
I saw a girl walking her dog a texting today, she tripped on her own dog, it was hilarious.
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Male 11
I understand the whole dont txt while driving thing, but seriously.... Why tell people. It wont help. Looking out the window is almost the same thing. Talking to your girlfriend in the passenger can become the same thing. Turning the radio can be the same thing.... come on now.
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Male 12,138
Ha, clever. I like it.

And @Crakr: [quote]"turbotong: Everybody will meet Jesus either as judge or savior."[/quote]
Weren`t you just telling me earlier today how you`ve never evangelised?
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Female 1,401
@ Ikeray, in MA you get pulled over if anyone in your car is seen without a seatbelt, but we`re all pretty reckless anyway
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Male 336
ha clever
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Female 1,677
Yeah exactly, that`s what I always say. If we`re allowed to have a radio in the car, then talking on the phone isn`t such a far leap (though I can understand the hands-free-only stipulation). I sing along to the radio when I`m driving, otherwise it`s too boring just sitting there. Singing, talking, it`s all the same.
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Male 2,703
"From what i hear they are still trying to convince people in the US to drive with their seat belts on"

in texas, you now get a ticket if you`re in the backseat w/o your seatbelt. and its not the driver who`s ticket unless its a <16 year old w/o a license
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Male 2,703
"If you can`t drive with one hand, you shouldn`t have a license."

its not the driving with one hand part, its the attention is somewhere else part. lots of people, believe it or not, still have 1-track minds, if they`re on the phone thinking of numbers or recalling something, they`re not paying much attention to the road.

then again, they still let people look down and look at radio controls or a/c knobs and thats worse than eyes on the road talking on the phone.
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Male 126
yeah, here if your under 18 you can`t talk on a cell phone while driving at all. Above can, just it has to be hands free.
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Male 9
From what i hear they are still trying to convince people in the US to drive with their seat belts on... Perhaps banning phone use is a bit to progressive :P
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Female 1,677
The first and only time I texted while driving, I almost rear-ended the person in front of me- it`s an acquired skill! But yeah I`m pretty sure I heard they`re going to start ticketing people who are talking on cellphones here too. That might be a bit much-- if people can smoke and drive, they can hold a cellphone and drive.

If you can`t drive with one hand, you shouldn`t have a license.
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Male 5,189
They may meet the devil instead for being so stupid. Lol o.o
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Male 1,118
Ha!
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Male 176
lol!
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Male 527
@TKD_Master

You, sir, fail.
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Female 3,574
@zombieland, where in Canada are you? In Ontario and Quebec you can talk on a cell while driving, but you have to use a hands-free device.
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Female 674
"I don`t agree with that. texting while driving is easy. If you can`t do it you are about as useful as a monkey."

Nobody said it wasn`t easy. It`s NOT SAFE. That`s the point that`s been made. Monkeys knew that before you.
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Female 798
@TKD are you seriously calling people stupid for being careful and courteous drivers? You are ridiculous, sir!
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Male 4,793
"Finally, a message from the church we can ALL agree on. "

I don`t agree with that. texting while driving is easy. If you can`t do it you are about as useful as a monkey.
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Male 1,013
ahhhh, there goes my bubble!
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Male 1,184
Yeah... like Lazy, I disagree.
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Male 25,416
wow! just wow!
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Male 7,840
thats funny as hell
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Female 1,963
LtFurpie, what if I`m a balding, fat woman? Perhaps the `freak` in my name is referring to my monstrous physical appearance? You never know.
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Male 10,440
[quote] Finally, a message from the church we can ALL agree on. [/quote]

Nope. I don`t agree. Try again.
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Male 1,013
18-29 european female with "freak" in her name. I side with her!

<Please, please don`t be a balding fat dude typing on iab in his underwear... please oh please don`t burst my bubble! />
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Female 1,963
Damn. Apparently I should know better than to attempt lame jokes.

And I think SCfan needs his humour filter replaced.
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Male 418
they recently passed a law were i live that u cannot talk on ur phone and drive !!BULL CRAP!! i understand txting... i guess. BUT I CANT TALK AND DRIVE??? CAN I STILL TALK TO SOMEONE IN THE PASSENGER SEAT??? PISS ME OFF.
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Male 2,085
Moefreak must be out of batteries. Kinda cranky.
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Male 503
@fractal514 "Moefreak, your attempt at wit is false... The sign was obviously intended for people driving by it, not for people on the internet. Where the sign was posted it might be legal to honk like that. You`re taking it out of context.

So yeah!"

you know it`s just a joke, right?
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Male 124
@CrakrJak

"turbotong: Everybody will meet Jesus either as judge or savior."

That`s *your* opinion and religious views.
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Male 2,440
[quote]Everybody will meet Jesus either as judge or savior.[/quote]
Pfffft. Says you. I`m meeting Odin.
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Male 500
epic win :-)
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Female 3,574
hahahaha
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Male 10
Moefreak, your attempt at wit is false... The sign was obviously intended for people driving by it, not for people on the internet. Where the sign was posted it might be legal to honk like that. You`re taking it out of context.

So yeah!
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Male 1,013
All of the publicized `text while driving` has not killed the texter, but rather other innocent people. again... religion fail. It should say: Believe in god and be misled, text while driving and those in your path will be dead.
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Male 17,511
turbotong: Everybody will meet Jesus either as judge or savior.
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Female 1,963
Well, where I live, honking unless it is actually necessary (to alert someone of some danger) is illegal.

The church is telling me to break the law!
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Male 17,511
Good one :-)
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Male 3,372
So....I don`t actually have to repent for my sins?
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Male 519
I will pass on both of those
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Female 248
ha nice
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Male 225
Lmao, this made my day.
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Male 600
then again not everybody may get to meet jesus...
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Male 600
lols
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Male 3,819
Link: Another Church Marquee Tells it Like it Is [Pic] [Rate Link] - Finally, a message from the church we can ALL agree on.
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