How To Get Rid Of Those Pesky Tan Lines [Pic]

Submitted by: Batmanners 7 years ago in Funny

Sick of those tans lines? The answer is here. Except for the 2 circles it leaves on each side. (slightly NSFW)
There are 62 comments:
Male 5,190
Ewww oO
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Male 9
they call that region "where the sun don`t shine" for a reason . . . and wouldn`t you get sand up there too?
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Male 230
i say its fake cuz the french used in it is extreamly slang
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Female 1,048
Hmmm - sunburnt buttcrack, pain on a whole new level! Mind you, it`s a great present for the spray tanorexic in your life - now every inch can be orange!
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Male 5,617
So, wouldn`t you just end up with little round untanned spots on your cheeks?
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Male 1,590
I`ve always wondered what to do with empty bobbins...
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Female 1,158
why wouldn`t you just prop up your ass by tucking your knees under yourself? instant spreading.

-shrug- works for me.
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Male 272
is it wrong that it made me gag for a wank?
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Male 2,690
R-O-F-L
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Female 3
Here are the two bottom lines:
"Existe en plusieurs parfums"
"Pas d`utilisation prolongée sans avis conjugal"
I may try to translate...:
"Available in several fragrances"
"No extended use without conjugal view"
!!!!
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Female 1,894
sstick a thimble in ur ass for only $19.99
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Male 44
The Goatse used to be a popular tan. That`s where you can see tan lines shaped like your hands holding your cheeks open. I guess this device will replace that =(
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Male 2,056
im pretty sure the penultimate line says comes in many models, and the last one says how it uses plastic or something without something else

tada.
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Male 298
Is it not brown enough already?
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Male 4,004
Exact translation for everything on there goes as follows:

"Bronze Everywhere, with RAIEDOREE (GOLDEN CRACK)"
"The butt-cheek spreader that allows you to golden your ass crack while remaining hands-free."

The two bottom lines I can`t read, but I love the "Protects the Ozone layer" logo on there...

I assume it`s ozone safe as long as you don`t fart.
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Male 1,598
If you have to jam a sewing thread spool in your ass crack to tan it, chances are that you were not meant to be that color :P
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Male 554
It`s called a common sewing thread spool.
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Female 355
Here`s a rough translation.
"Bronze everywhere with Raidoree!
Isolated-spank which makes it possible to gild the line by keeping the free hands"

Fix up the grammar yourself. I`m too tired right now. :c
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Male 391
Only the French would...
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Female 2,352
You think a sunburn on your back is painful. .
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Male 527
You know, there`s a reason WHY the sun doesn`t shine there.
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Male 10,855
Just imagine the horror on the faces of those passing by..... D:
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Male 2,868
Great, so no I have a spool-shaped white spot between my cheeks!
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Male 1,312
@ deltaumarcus: Holy crap i think so! gross...
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Male 8,302
> Thetas
> Is that... Just a spool painted bronze?

NOOOOO!!!! That would be worth like 2 cents!! THIS is the Amazing Raidoree, the wonder tool which gives you hands-free buttock separation so they can bask in the sun!
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Male 2,516
I can`t believe people love looking orange, I have an idea, instead of doing all those horrible looking things like painting yourself orange or cooking yourself under the sun, why not just eat tons of carrots?, I guarantee you`ll look orange and as long as you continue the carrot ingestion you`ll continue looking orange.

Why on earth would anybody want to look like that? ...
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Male 25,416
what, someone actually sat down and thought about this? wow!
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Female 59
it makes me glad im already naturally tan
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Male 1,958
.... Do I see butthole hairs?
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Male 1,540
Is that... Just a spool painted bronze?
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Male 3,842
WTF - is there really someone out there who is upset because their butthole isn`t tan enough?
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Female 3,828
@margot- i thought the same thing.:-)

i figure you wouldnt use it all the time, and rotate the spot where it goes- at least the contrast between dark and light wont be quite so much.
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Male 118
"I just imagined getting an anal sunburn. The pain will not cease."

Lol. Thanks for reminding me of the possibilities of getting an anal sunburn. That`s one thing I`ve actually never tought about:)
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Male 3,255
People who tan are idiots who look like they just rolled around in dog poo.

F*ck tans are gross.
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Male 493
I just imagined getting an anal sunburn. The pain will not cease.
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Female 265
Or, you know, fake tan? XD
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Female 1,001
How to get rid of those pesky tan lines.. in the privacy of your own garden.
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Female 322
what are you going to do about the spots that don`t get tan from having that thing in your crack
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Male 5,194
New product idea: Get a small tanning light, put it in a wedge-shaped glass thing, call it... I dunno, "Crackin` Tan" or "Tannin` Crack" or something. On the shelf for $19.95, make a fortune.
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Male 217
It looks like a cotton reel
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Female 864
but doesn`t that block the sun from that spot and give you a weird tan line anyway?
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Female 414
roitDX thats exactly what it looks like
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Male 537
Someone with a spool in their ass... I shouldn`t be laughing, but I am.
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Male 74
thanks for the NSFW warning!
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Female 282
those french sure are thorough....
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Male 12,138
I feel a Johnny Cash song coming on...
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Male 599
Is it just me or does that look like just a spool from some thread that was painted gold
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Male 1,023
my eyes are burn`t. Why was there no "nsfw"
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Male 807
ew
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Female 9,475
Eye bleach for five bucks! Get it here! Five Dollars!
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Male 46
Smells like burnt a**hole in here!
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Male 440
What.The.Fcuk.
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Female 1,172
Or you could just spread your legs a little bit. :/
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Male 734
I hope that sorta thing doesn`t conduct heat well. O_O
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Male 15,510
France?
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Male 16
Ooohhh god, the name of this thing in english would be golden crack.
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Male 1,240
That`s one way to do it.
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Male 1,108
Buttplug? You`re doing it wrong!
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Male 719
But then how do you explain the circular tan lines?
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Male 75
It`s a cotton reel! And the french bit says it keeps your arse cheeks open whilst keeping your hands free! Ha!!
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Male 30
nsfw much?
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Male 4,004
Link: How To Get Rid Of Those Pesky Tan Lines [Pic] [Rate Link] - Sick of those tans lines? The answer is here. Except for the 2 circles it leaves on each side. (slightly NSFW)
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