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Category: Misc
Date: 04/30/10 12:35 PM

82 Responses to Most Perverted Grocery List Ever Written [Pic]

  1. Profile photo of xxPinkxx
    xxPinkxx Female 18-29
    3830 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 10:51 am
    Link: Most Perverted Grocery List Ever Written - It was found in Seattle parking lot and we`d love to party with the person who wrote it.night. NSFW words used.
  2. Profile photo of Monosandalos
    Monosandalos Male 30-39
    277 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 11:23 am
    Quite normal if your main profession is to be a dominatrix.
    I wonder why Walter`s name isn`t blurred...
  3. Profile photo of ScottSerious
    ScottSerious Male 18-29
    5316 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:06 pm
    i think it is crazy that i was just looking at this on kontraband.
  4. Profile photo of Rawrandmer
    Rawrandmer Female 13-17
    282 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:07 pm
    Wow.
  5. Profile photo of BenTheBug
    BenTheBug Male 18-29
    1195 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:09 pm
    That sounds pricey.
  6. Profile photo of fiizok
    fiizok Male 40-49
    591 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:50 pm
    Seattle must have some very unusual grocery stores.
  7. Profile photo of Angelmassb
    Angelmassb Male 18-29
    15511 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:52 pm
    They must be rich and bored
  8. Profile photo of SEpth
    SEpth Female 18-29
    47 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:52 pm
    ...It`s a little disheartening to see that the name is Walter; that`s an old man name. A grandmother wrote this list :(
  9. Profile photo of NottaSpy
    NottaSpy Male 40-49
    881 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 12:53 pm
    I think Walter should lay off the butt-plug if he has hemorrhoids.
  10. Profile photo of Nidonemo
    Nidonemo Male 18-29
    9311 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:00 pm
    How delightful that they`re so casual about their kinky lifestyle. XD
  11. Profile photo of Nerdfighter0
    Nerdfighter0 Male 18-29
    212 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:03 pm
    ew.
  12. Profile photo of fabarati
    fabarati Male 18-29
    1240 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:05 pm
    @BenTheBug: it is pricey.
  13. Profile photo of Generaljigsa
    Generaljigsa Male 18-29
    8 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:09 pm
    No way I used to work at Thriftway in West Seattle lol
  14. Profile photo of lostinkorea
    lostinkorea Female 30-39
    3727 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:17 pm
    Yuck, Preparation H for the nasty ass bumps...
    ew...ewww...ewwww
  15. Profile photo of BrimstoneOne
    BrimstoneOne Male 30-39
    2229 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:23 pm
    "I think Walter should lay off the butt-plug if he has hemorrhoids."

    Where in hell do think the hemorrhoids came from?
  16. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25406 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:34 pm
    What nana`s obviously not getting any! they failed the moment they had a buick!
  17. Profile photo of Oystah
    Oystah Female 40-49
    4033 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 1:37 pm
    That made me remember a time I went to a friend`s apartment and reached in the dishwasher to get a glass and what was in there with the dishes? That`s right, anal beads. WTF!!!! Aahhhhh, I`ll never forget that.
  18. Profile photo of pui
    pui Female 18-29
    3575 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 2:07 pm
    Walter needs to find a new fetish.
  19. Profile photo of SuperSmash
    SuperSmash Male 18-29
    3758 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 2:11 pm
    They`re also getting an XL cucumber.
  20. Profile photo of Johanvb
    Johanvb Male 40-49
    496 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 2:14 pm
    Cigarettes!!! YUCK!!!
  21. Profile photo of pui
    pui Female 18-29
    3575 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 2:15 pm
    SEpth, lol because people can only have kinky sex before they`re 35. After that you`re doomed to the missionary position :(
  22. Profile photo of beternal
    beternal Male 18-29
    2589 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 2:57 pm
    Isn`t all this stuff standard?! - I mean MY GOD! - how have they enjoyed their sex life before this point?!

    /jk

    Seriously, isn`t this just a bit weird that they`re buying the `full range` of S/M gear all in one go? - surely they would have tried out a little before and probably got at the minimum a dildo or something?! - I mean how do they know they`re into it?!
  23. Profile photo of ultimakewl
    ultimakewl Male 18-29
    833 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:16 pm
    poor walter
  24. Profile photo of xhaseox
    xhaseox Male 18-29
    519 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:23 pm
    am all for bdsm but I dont think you should put those types of things on a list like that
  25. Profile photo of Lamiacraor
    Lamiacraor Female 18-29
    231 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:26 pm
    I agree with Beternal. I own half of that stuff and I know for a fact that such a list is WAY to expensive to be acquired all at once. We are talking about $600 worth of stuff, if not more.
    If you ask me, this was highly unrealistic and just written to be a joke- nothing actually serious.
  26. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    31766 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:37 pm
    people can only have kinky sex before they`re 35
    pui pui pui, most folks get into the kink AFTER they turn 35, I oughta know! ;) <wink!
    Walter`s going to be all tied up this weekend! LMAO!
    And yeah, the two of them should be purchacing these things together, not "Oh Waaaalter, guess whaaaaat I bought you?"
  27. Profile photo of magoo22
    magoo22 Male 30-39
    660 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:47 pm
    "dildo.. strap-on.. black" ...we`re on a mission from God!
  28. Profile photo of shizzamX
    shizzamX Female 18-29
    2697 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:48 pm
    idk if i`d want to hang out with these guys.. they eat cottage cheese, i mean come on..
  29. Profile photo of korahn
    korahn Male 30-39
    1249 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:52 pm
    so, the plug is for Walter but the rooster ring is for someone else. Multiple partners, methinks?
  30. Profile photo of someguy83
    someguy83 Male 18-29
    119 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 3:55 pm
    "I agree with Beternal. I own half of that stuff and I know for a fact that such a list is WAY to expensive to be acquired all at once. We are talking about $600 worth of stuff, if not more.
    If you ask me, this was highly unrealistic and just written to be a joke- nothing actually serious. "

    why not possible? 600 dollars isn`t impossible to drop on something. i spend that much or more constantly when it comes to gaming. if that is their form of entertainment/pleasure then they prolly don`t have a problem with it. me? all i need is to do some good hair pulling/biting for a good time. oh and i like to spank also. they of course are welcome to bite and scratch me in return
  31. Profile photo of Brassbull
    Brassbull Male 30-39
    1614 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 4:12 pm
    I`m surprised they don`t have a sex swing on that list. Those things are AWESOME!!!
  32. Profile photo of CoffeeDiiva
    CoffeeDiiva Female 40-49
    1605 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 4:13 pm
    could hardly read the writing. but I have to agree that it more than likely isn`t a real list
  33. Profile photo of pui
    pui Female 18-29
    3575 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 4:27 pm
    5Cats, lol I was being sarcastic :P
  34. Profile photo of Lamiacraor
    Lamiacraor Female 18-29
    231 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 4:52 pm
    Someguy83: It is not possible because the money does not always come so easily and in that same amount. Counting bills, gas, and food; $600 is not easy to come by.
    There are some things I wish I could have, for instance; I am married to a male, but I wish I could have a female some times, there are toys for that, that I cannot afford.
    I am also one for cutting, hitting, punching, skinning, all that "hardcore" jazz. But with a monthly income of $1800, there is not much I can acquire and still care for a family.
  35. Profile photo of Aellos
    Aellos Female 18-29
    33 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 5:11 pm
    I love how reading the perverted part suddenly made everything below it much more nasty. DX
  36. Profile photo of BunnyNaku
    BunnyNaku Female 18-29
    5224 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 5:15 pm
    oh sweet! mac n cheese!
  37. Profile photo of Lionhart2
    Lionhart2 Male 40-49
    8309 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 5:17 pm
    It`s the extra-large cucumber with a smiley face after it that worries me.
  38. Profile photo of GlooStikk
    GlooStikk Male 18-29
    1297 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 5:31 pm
    walter best recognize
  39. Profile photo of Spider_sol
    Spider_sol Male 18-29
    1452 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 5:48 pm
    If Walter needs Preparation H already I don`t think he`s gonna be in the mood for a butt plug.

    But I guess that`s what the ball gag is for.
  40. Profile photo of CmdrBittles
    CmdrBittles Female 18-29
    1173 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 6:06 pm
    What? Hasn`t everyone written a shopping list like this before?
  41. Profile photo of SamVimes
    SamVimes Male 30-39
    619 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 6:32 pm
    Considering the implications of the other 2 smiley faces, is anyone else frightened by the request to, "Put gasoline in the Buick"?

  42. Profile photo of LuckyDave
    LuckyDave Male 18-29
    675 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 6:43 pm
    Not once did I see an entry for a condom... for Walter :)
  43. Profile photo of Lejjena
    Lejjena Male 18-29
    68 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 7:01 pm
    Looks like Walter`s lucky night
  44. Profile photo of CreepyShanny
    CreepyShanny Female 18-29
    152 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 7:26 pm
    Spider_sol



    That`s good stuff, man....you made me lol
  45. Profile photo of Unmedicated
    Unmedicated Female 18-29
    10 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 8:03 pm
    There are a lot of BDSM life stylers out there with lots of cash. This list is plausible. These mentioned here are only a few minor toys among the large list of things they COULD be buying. Usually things like butt plugs and anal beads and dildos are bought more then once. Different styles and sizes.
  46. Profile photo of CPLP
    CPLP Male 30-39
    3 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 8:11 pm
    Holy poo! I love West Seattle!
  47. Profile photo of IshiiDaFishy
    IshiiDaFishy Male 18-29
    773 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 8:22 pm
    I wanna know what they plan to do with the ground beef.
  48. Profile photo of pixiechick81
    pixiechick81 Female 30-39
    838 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 8:31 pm
    if you have a problem with hemorrhoid a butt plug is probably not the best way to go
  49. Profile photo of Arandanos
    Arandanos Female 18-29
    223 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 8:39 pm
    I am actually a very kinky person, but ROIDS, WALTER? ROIDS AND XL TOYS? DO YOU WANT YOUR RECTUM TO FALL OFF ONE DAY?
  50. Profile photo of xxPinkxx
    xxPinkxx Female 18-29
    3830 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 9:44 pm
    I think this list is plausible. i write down EVERYTHING, if i dont, i`ll forget it. theres a couple weird lists around my house im sure. ( though not this bad!)
  51. Profile photo of LemonTarte
    LemonTarte Female 18-29
    1441 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 9:50 pm
    I haven`t even heard of half of these things.
  52. Profile photo of KittenCereal
    KittenCereal Female 18-29
    956 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 9:53 pm
    I admit it. >.>

    It was me.

  53. Profile photo of AlANeptune
    AlANeptune Female 18-29
    264 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 9:57 pm
    Hahaha! I love how they put in the foods afterwards like it wasn`t even that big a deal...

    "cucumber (xl)" anyone else catch that? XP
  54. Profile photo of CmdrBittles
    CmdrBittles Female 18-29
    1173 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 9:58 pm
    Isn`t it funny that most of the girls think there`s nothing wrong with this list but the guys are shocked? lol I guess girls just write more lists than boys.
  55. Profile photo of iLoveChoo
    iLoveChoo Female 18-29
    120 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 11:29 pm
    I have used butt plug as a scattergories word and only half the room knew what it was.
  56. Profile photo of idiotfilter
    idiotfilter Male 18-29
    3916 posts
    April 30, 2010 at 11:54 pm
    "butt plug for walter (XL)"

    Damn...is there anything not wrong with this post??

  57. Profile photo of Lionhart2
    Lionhart2 Male 40-49
    8309 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 12:08 am
    > idiotfilter
    > "butt plug for walter (XL)"
    > Damn... is there anything not wrong with this post??

    Nope. You DO realize Walter is his pet gerbil?
  58. Profile photo of Cajun247
    Cajun247 Male 18-29
    10722 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 1:06 am
    @Lionhart2
    Some gerbil
  59. Profile photo of TR-Wolf
    TR-Wolf Male 18-29
    1557 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 2:31 am
    What the hell is hamburger helper?
  60. Profile photo of IQover
    IQover Male 13-17
    1043 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 4:42 am
    TR - Wolf.
    I think it IS kinda hard to prepare a hamburger when u got dildos, anal clams and that poo up your butt.

    They r smart:D
  61. Profile photo of mamba
    mamba Male 18-29
    628 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 5:23 am
    "Cucumber (XL) :-) " is anyone getting this, i would never eat at their house!
  62. Profile photo of GothicQueen
    GothicQueen Male 13-17
    4376 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 7:58 am
    I wouldn`t mind a few of those actually.
  63. Profile photo of bored-am-I
    bored-am-I Male 30-39
    785 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 8:02 am
    Auch, don`t stretch my balls...
  64. Profile photo of daisy822
    daisy822 Female 13-17
    1043 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 9:39 am
    carrots...celery...cucumber....XL?!?! ehhhh!...
  65. Profile photo of rawrarrg
    rawrarrg Female 18-29
    120 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 9:55 am
    porn stars, or just really kinky people?
  66. Profile photo of SaiyanRocker
    SaiyanRocker Male 18-29
    101 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 1:23 pm
    Isn`t Walter one of Jeff Dunham`s puppets?
  67. Profile photo of jacobsona29
    jacobsona29 Female 18-29
    233 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 1:26 pm
    OMG i wana party with them!!!!!!!!!!
  68. Profile photo of CodeJockey
    CodeJockey Male 40-49
    5606 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 1:26 pm
    "Upon second thought, if you just stop by give Walter a good fisting, it would be much appreciated. I`ll do the shopping myself..."
  69. Profile photo of Malakos
    Malakos Male 18-29
    113 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 2:21 pm
    The combination of Preparation H and a butt-plug brings bad images to mind...
  70. Profile photo of IssaTheFiend
    IssaTheFiend Female 18-29
    2354 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 3:05 pm
    Grocery list for an upcoming orgy?

    Needs more ball stretchers.
  71. Profile photo of mvangild
    mvangild Male 30-39
    527 posts
    May 1, 2010 at 5:09 pm
    I`m thinking I see a connection between Walter`s Preparation H and his, um, other items on that list.
  72. Profile photo of rakoonhat
    rakoonhat Female 30-39
    654 posts
    May 2, 2010 at 12:57 am
    how are you honestly going to buy/eat yogurt after experiencing this little night of debauchery?
  73. Profile photo of BRITATTACK
    BRITATTACK Female 13-17
    198 posts
    May 2, 2010 at 1:39 am
    I must say that I am most creeped out by the fact that there is a little smiley by carrots and an XL (?)cucumber? Hmmmmm...
  74. Profile photo of SomeShoes
    SomeShoes Male 13-17
    2056 posts
    May 2, 2010 at 3:22 pm
    Can`t....decipher....writing!
  75. Profile photo of Mouichi
    Mouichi Male 18-29
    637 posts
    May 3, 2010 at 2:26 am
    Cottage cheese is gross.
  76. Profile photo of MetalicDemon
    MetalicDemon Male 18-29
    1485 posts
    May 3, 2010 at 6:02 am
    i think walter may just be a little bit gay
  77. Profile photo of Tukikagami
    Tukikagami Female 18-29
    112 posts
    May 3, 2010 at 12:07 pm
    Oh gross! Who the hell eats hamburger helper? Seriously GROSS!
  78. Profile photo of Pyrosisflame
    Pyrosisflame Male 18-29
    592 posts
    May 4, 2010 at 10:47 am
    SomeShoes
    Male, 13-17, Canada
    799 Posts Sunday, May 2, 2010 3:22:29 PM
    ___________________

    +1 i gave up after "put gasoline into buick"
  79. Profile photo of necrobitch
    necrobitch Female 18-29
    467 posts
    May 19, 2010 at 7:08 pm
    cottage cheese for the dirty pussy effect
  80. Profile photo of Trollinhomes
    Trollinhomes Male 18-29
    81 posts
    June 14, 2010 at 7:24 pm
    wow just wow.
  81. Profile photo of janus_games
    janus_games Male 18-29
    294 posts
    July 18, 2010 at 2:02 am
    I just laugh at some of the pairings...

    Preparation H and an extra large bum plug for walter...

    Hilarious

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