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Date: 04/01/10 04:02 PM

49 Responses to Man Assaults Female Cop, Lays Smack Down On Her

  1. Profile photo of Twigz_77
    Twigz_77 Male 30-39
    12 posts
    March 31, 2010 at 2:56 pm
    Link: Man Assaults Female Cop, Lays Smack Down On Her - Pop quiz, I-A-B: What did this man use to assault the female officer? What did he use!
  2. Profile photo of dotrom
    dotrom Female 18-29
    92 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:13 pm
    What a creative way to receive a sexual harassment charge!
  3. Profile photo of trailleadr
    trailleadr Male 40-49
    715 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:15 pm
    "The accused got to his feet and was standing over the police officer exposing his penis and thrusting it in her face, forcing her to take evasive action to avoid getting struck."

    How tall is this guy, or how short is the cop??
  4. Profile photo of Coodude26
    Coodude26 Male 13-17
    340 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:32 pm
    "Fiscal depute Elaine Lynch said: "The accused got to his feet and was standing over the police officer exposing his penis and thrusting it in her face, forcing her to take evasive action to avoid getting struck." "


    bahhahahahahahahaha
  5. Profile photo of Angilion
    Angilion Male 40-49
    12387 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:34 pm
    Maybe she was sitting down for some reason, trailleadr.
  6. Profile photo of Angilion
    Angilion Male 40-49
    12387 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:40 pm
    No doubt some people here have been too drunk to know what they were doing or remember it when they sobered up.

    If you`re ever in that situation and people are winding you up with hints about something you did, at least now you can point at this story and say "I bet it wasn`t as bad as that".
  7. Profile photo of skypirate
    skypirate Male 18-29
    2415 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:43 pm
    he was only fined!? my god, couldn`t imagine the charge if he were in the states.
  8. Profile photo of madest
    madest Male 40-49
    7378 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:48 pm
    Fine sounds reasonable. She`s a Lithuanian police officer, she`s seen worse.
  9. Profile photo of unsub
    unsub Female 18-29
    924 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:55 pm
    "She`s a Lithuanian police officer, she`s seen worse."

    It was in Scotland, not in Lithuania.
  10. Profile photo of MizzMe
    MizzMe Female 18-29
    509 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 4:58 pm
    This made me laugh...does that make me bad?
  11. Profile photo of ryan99
    ryan99 Male 13-17
    2345 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 5:45 pm
    Grrr, stolen from meh agaaain.
  12. Profile photo of The_Garuness
    The_Garuness Male 18-29
    931 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 6:07 pm
    yaaaay, i submitted this weeks ago but it got ignored(!)
  13. Profile photo of aseirinn
    aseirinn Male 70 & Over
    877 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 6:38 pm
    he was in his own house...whats the problem?
  14. Profile photo of Boadicea
    Boadicea Female 18-29
    1677 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 6:40 pm
    Wow I totally guessed penis before going in thinking `but that`s so drating gross and somehow obvious it won`t be. probably a potato or something.`

    She should have nightsticked him in the balls.
  15. Profile photo of ultimakewl
    ultimakewl Male 18-29
    833 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 6:44 pm
    called it. must be spending too much time here
  16. Profile photo of bananajojo
    bananajojo Female 18-29
    1401 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 6:48 pm
    I WIN POP QUIZ!
  17. Profile photo of LazyMe484
    LazyMe484 Male 18-29
    10441 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 7:02 pm
    That`s what happens when you`re drunk.
  18. Profile photo of nick9399
    nick9399 Male 18-29
    59 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 7:11 pm
    Thought this was funny and possibly pertaining to the story when I opened it up in a new tab.


  19. Profile photo of Farsidedown
    Farsidedown Male 18-29
    421 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 7:39 pm
    EVASIVE MANEUVERS
  20. Profile photo of wko
    wko Male 18-29
    554 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 7:48 pm
    lol `man used penis to ass...` i see the same on my tab =D
  21. Profile photo of BlankTom
    BlankTom Male 30-39
    1674 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 8:38 pm
    and the best part is that it has a happy ending!
  22. Profile photo of IssaTheFiend
    IssaTheFiend Female 18-29
    2353 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 8:44 pm
    Lol "she had to take evasive action to avoid being struck". XD
  23. Profile photo of Skeezer1991
    Skeezer1991 Male 18-29
    721 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 8:51 pm
    Wow I was just gonna comment on here before even reading the article "it was his penis" just to be a dick (no pun intended) lol
  24. Profile photo of carpedog
    carpedog Female 40-49
    50 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 9:32 pm
    what was her head doing down there anyway?
  25. Profile photo of falloutchik
    falloutchik Female 18-29
    78 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 9:45 pm
    why was her head any where near his groin area? is that new police policy for an arrest these days?
  26. Profile photo of jinxiejae
    jinxiejae Female 30-39
    2927 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 10:24 pm
    standing over the officer? what is he 9foot 8 tall,?was he wearing platforms?
  27. Profile photo of wolfguy423
    wolfguy423 Male 18-29
    172 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 10:35 pm
    OMG, LOL I totally guessed that before i even read the report on it.. ^_^
  28. Profile photo of xohbkxo
    xohbkxo Male 18-29
    15 posts
    April 1, 2010 at 11:26 pm

  29. Profile photo of 66stang
    66stang Male 18-29
    225 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 12:07 am
    I`m more confused about why the cops even came in the first place. He was drunk in his home. he was sitting on the couch, which would suggest he was not being violent, which means she could have left. and if the roles were reversed the police wouldve told him to man up and leave.
  30. Profile photo of Flibmeister
    Flibmeister Female 18-29
    833 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 1:02 am
    erm... struck her on the head with his penis? whaaaaa?!
  31. Profile photo of Rick_S
    Rick_S Male 40-49
    3282 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 2:44 am
    What a height difference that must have been if he was able to get his penis around her head area. Unless she was on her knees, but why would a cop be on her knees. I just don`t see how this came about happening.
  32. Profile photo of mal_BB
    mal_BB Male 18-29
    1231 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 3:30 am
    Aberdeen? Surprising there wasn`t some sort of duel between him and the officer...
  33. Profile photo of xxPinkxx
    xxPinkxx Female 18-29
    3829 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 3:30 am
    She was prolly grossed out and thought she`d get crabs or something, so she prevented any chance of THAT happening. LOL
  34. Profile photo of Loew
    Loew Female 40-49
    68 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 4:05 am
    Bet she didn`t see that cumming.
  35. Profile photo of ICanHasWin
    ICanHasWin Male 13-17
    24 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 4:15 am
    ARgghhhhh! Repost!
  36. Profile photo of TR-Wolf
    TR-Wolf Male 18-29
    1557 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 4:23 am
    I remember this story. It`s stupid, as though it would`ve done any harm.
  37. Profile photo of riotDX
    riotDX Male 18-29
    600 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 4:47 am
    "Forcing her to take evasive action" lulz
  38. Profile photo of pottersclay
    pottersclay Female 30-39
    108 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 7:14 am
    my answer was "his pimp hand" but this was so much better
  39. Profile photo of 5Cats
    5Cats Male 50-59
    32829 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 8:35 am
    So it`s not just the plot of a porno? LoLz!
  40. Profile photo of ChelseaSmile
    ChelseaSmile Male 18-29
    9 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 9:07 am
    "Police were called to his home by his girlfriend, who had complained about him being drunk last November. "
    wow, that is some response time.
  41. Profile photo of GirlieMutant
    GirlieMutant Female 18-29
    236 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 9:37 am
    I`m gonna guess his d!ck!! And I was right..

    *lost faith in humanity once again*
  42. Profile photo of idiotfilter
    idiotfilter Male 18-29
    3916 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 2:39 pm
    sheesh! is he 10 feet tall or swingin a 3 foot schlong?!
  43. Profile photo of SmilinSam
    SmilinSam Female 18-29
    3599 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 2:45 pm
    haha, EVASIVE MANUVERES!! UNIDENTIFIED FLYING PENIS IN AREA!
  44. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25420 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 2:48 pm
    ok! random!
  45. Profile photo of Saragato
    Saragato Female 18-29
    721 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 3:43 pm
    Avoid being struck? What the hell was she doing that close to begin with and why at the level of his crotch?
  46. Profile photo of shizzamX
    shizzamX Female 18-29
    2695 posts
    April 2, 2010 at 9:02 pm
    wait.. his wife called the police on him because he was drunk? what the drat
  47. Profile photo of Aobuluz
    Aobuluz Male 18-29
    28 posts
    April 3, 2010 at 7:46 am
    Ohh at long last, something on i-am-bored that is near me! :-D This was just down the road from where i live :P Doesn`t mean I can explain htf he managed so swing his schlong at her though :-/
  48. Profile photo of Angilion
    Angilion Male 40-49
    12387 posts
    April 3, 2010 at 4:31 pm
    For all those people wondering about height and whether he was 10 feet tall, imagine this scenario:

    Man is sitting down.

    Copper sits or squats to talk to him in an unthreatening manner.

    Man stands up quickly.

    Now...how tall is a standing man likely to be relative to a sitting or squatting woman?

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