6 Shockingly Evil Things Babies Are Capable Of

Submitted by: cobrakiller 7 years ago in Misc
http://www.cracked.com/article_18404_6-shockingly-evil-things-babies-are-capable-of.html

See that cute little baby over there? It"s adorable right? Sure it is... or is it?
There are 41 comments:
Female 914
@ Lejjena, a woman wrote the article, so...yeah.
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Male 101
i like how there`s an adoption ad on that page
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Female 5,222
wow, i really enjoyed this article XD
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Male 68
the dude who wrote this is sort of an @$$h0l3 with all them "stupid F**king babies" remarks
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Male 509
My dog does half the things on this list - especially the "stealing and thinking everything is theirs" one. She`s actually stolen a crisp out of my hand when I wasn`t looking before
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Male 500
TalcumX, Um, how could you disagree with the obvious but unfortunate fact that the world is overpopulated so much that you wish someone was never born? Thats not dissimilar to wishing them dead! are you a christian by any chance? Or just a bully because he was off-topic? Once you are born you are human and that`s that; I think the prevention of so many being born is the issue he was alluding to.
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Male 561
Hey StarDagger, it,s a a shame your parents didn`t subscribe to your point of view.
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Female 5
OMG that was hilarious!
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Male 1,190
5cats, I know you are a radical Xian, but the world needs fewer people to reproduce. The only problem earth has is that there are too many humans, screwing things up, by sheer numbers.

And now I know you think that Jeebus will come and make everything alright, but if that fantasy scenario does not happen we have to live on a planet that is undergoing serious problems because of our consumption.

So, don`t think that you have some human right to reproduce just because you can give the rugrat a middle-class level of comfort.

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Female 444
Babbys ivil
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Female 1,283
What, no projectile vomit attacks?
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Male 9,305
Eh not surprising really. Mimics a lot of behavior found in other creatures on this Earth.

We ARE animals remember...society or not.

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Female 78
Work in a nursery.... Babies are very evil (if evil means all the things on that list). Crying for attention is the WORST, especially when you are alone in a room with 4 wailing babies that are just doing it for attention. People come by all the time thinking I`m torturing them or something.
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Female 33
omigod i`m left handed : 0 im a fetus muderer?
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Male 91
I can`t count the number of times I`ve seen a baby/toddler lie...
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Female 1,386
Yeah... thats pretty much how I see babies.
Evil, and not worth the effort. When my Nephew was a baby he would toss his bowl off the table just to make my mom pick it up when she`d babysit him. And while she was bent over picking it up... his creepy little gaze would turn to me and say (without words) "I can make her do this as many times as I want, and I find it amusing."
Freakin` babies...
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Male 40,277
[quote]We don`t need little copies of StarDagger`s genetic information.[/quote]

FiFY! Who could say such a useless thing after reading something funny about babies? Adopt? And further someone less successful than yourself`s DNA? Great idea.
Don`t get me wrong, adoption is golden! Heck I`m adopted! But if you can make your own babies, care for and raise them in a loving and proper environment? Go for it!
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Female 154
That was full of awesome.
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Female 166
Lelio, LOL!
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Male 51
They left out "Waging Chemical Warfare".
D:
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Female 166
I love these 6___ Things from Cracked. This one is especially good.
"Babies are so good at that lie they will even pause briefly and listen to see if someone is responding to their crocodile tears before starting up again."
Want proof? Watch this vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JvrDrreki...
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Male 1,190
We do not need more kids, adopt. We don`t need little copies of their genetic information.
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Male 368
BABIES! PERFECT FUEL FOR KILLING TINY MEN! OMNOMNOMNOMNOM
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Male 25,417
They are forgetting something, babies will always wake you when you are really really tired!
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Male 14,331
Hmmm ya I`m not ambidextrous because I can`t write with my right hand. I guess I should start writing horror novels ooohhhh something with zombies.
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Female 570
i always knew babies were fake and evil, there`s just something off about all that cuteness. kitties are better.
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Female 4,039
LOL - The writing in this piece is so funny!

@McGovern - it means you must be really good at writing evil things, but not so much of an evil-doer?

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Male 2,034
I literally lol`ed when I saw the picture for #1. So sinister.
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Male 7,808
mcgovern1981, ambidextrous?
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Male 3,842
"Ooh, I`m left handed and my grandmother is a twin...perhaps it`s time to give Mom a call and ask about her pregnancy."

Mom wouldn`t have any way of knowing that you murdered your twin, you murdering murderer, since you did it before you showed up on ultrasound.

However, based on the fact that you are sinister and that twins run in your family, you almost certainly killed your twin. Good times!

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Male 14,331
I write left but do pretty much everything else right handed so what would that mean?
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Female 864
My fiance is a lefty hmmm
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Male 1,929
I lolled when I scrolled to "Murder"
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Male 964
So that explains the mark on my left hand...but i still won!
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Male 7,808
the left handed ladies seem to enjoy the i-a-b
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Female 2,509
"Irrelevant in your tiny, racist baby mind"

bwahahahahaahaha
oh, and I am left handed.
bwahahahaahahahah

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Male 2,549
Ooh, I`m left handed and my grandmother is a twin...perhaps it`s time to give Mom a call and ask about her pregnancy. o_O
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Female 525
Hmm my dad`s ex-girlfriend from hell was a lefty..early sign of evil ness?
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Male 715
My step mother is left handed. This explains a lot, because she is evil!
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Female 721
I`m left-handed.

Welp, time to check my cooter for teeth or a limb.

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Male 7,808
Link: 6 Shockingly Evil Things Babies Are Capable Of [Rate Link] - See that cute little baby over there? It`s adorable right? Sure it is... or is it?
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