The Top 20 Worst Pick-Up Lines Ever

Submitted by: SaintPatty 7 years ago in
http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-your-worst-pickup-lines/

These are admittedly bad but I"ve used worse and I"m sure I-A-B ladies have heard worse than that. Share your best/worst
There are 78 comments:
Female 500
garanteed to get you slapped.
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Male 83
Me, checking my wallet: Oh, F**K ME!
Her: Oh, what`s wrong?
Me: No, that was a request.
Her: F**K YOU!
Me: That was what I was driving at.
Me: OWWWW....

dames don`t appreciate post-modern sexism.

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Female 12
Had a friend of mine get hit on by a pentecostal guy when we were about 16 at the restaurant I worked at. He came up to her and said, "Are you a Visa? Because you`re everywhere I want to be." Soooo tacky and funny. (Also, isn`t that American Express` slogan?)
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Male 30
1 time i walked up to a random girl to test if pick up lines worked,i was like "hey come here often?" which was stupid cause we were in a hallway..sadly it didnt work! GRR!
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Female 517
#10 happend O_o
Loled at #11 P:
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Female 6
Lol I like #7 and #20
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Male 81
"if you were a gas in my lower intestine, i would never fart, in fear that i would lose you"
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Male 1,164
best: GUY: excuse me? but do you work in subway?
GIRL: no why?
GUY: because you just gave me a footlong *points at crotch*
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Male 30
sorry bout double postin but the best pick up lines come from your heart, 1 time out of the blue i told a girl "why you gotta be so beautiful,you put the other girls to shame" also i wouldnt call em pick up lines:)..cause they usually dont work,look at johnny bravo.
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Male 30
1 time i walked up to a random girl to test if pick up lines worked,i was like "hey come here often?" which was stupid cause we were in a hallway..sadly it didnt work! GRR!
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Female 437
"Polar bear."
"What?"
"Well it broke the ice!"
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Female 5,222
17, 18 and 20 ROFL
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Male 2,199
do pick up lines even work anymore... better yet, have they ever worked?
"hey baby is it hot here? or is it you?"
"oh my god i love you!"
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Female 668
worst one ever used on me? "do you come to this Library often? *WINK*"
...wow.
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Male 12,138
[quote]"Hey, did you fall from heaven baby, or does this smell like chloroform?"[/quote]

Ah yes Opie, happy memories, good times of past lols.

Remember this one? "Hey, I`m a rag and bone man. Now, you sniff on this rag while I give you a bone."

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Male 795
"Can I push your stool in?" rofl
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Female 678
One of my favorites:

"Do you wanna f**k or do I owe you an apology?

One of the guys from the shop asked a girl that and I almost died laughing at him.

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Male 2,332
Rofl dogboy >.<
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Female 1,412
If you jingle my bells, Ill give you a white christmas
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Female 4,197
only one I`ve heard is `Hey come outside, I wanna show you something. Your friends will be fine, let`s go` And then he proceeded to drag me off the dancefloor outside til my flatemate almost knocked him on his ass.

God only knows what would`ve happened had the creep succeeded *shudder*

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Male 156
Well it`s not a chat up line as such. I put my winky in her hand and then I start to cry. Strangely it hasn`t worked yet...
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Female 72
worst ever (on so many levels): "how do u like ur eggs in the morning? scrambled or fertilized?"
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Male 18
Hi my name is Doug, that`s God spelled backwards with you wrapped up in it.
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Female 47
`Wanna make my snake throw up?`
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Male 388
Is your dad a plumber? Cuz you`re the S H I T
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Male 926
I wouldn`t want to have the woman who could be had with pickup lines.
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Male 60
Hey babe,u ever heard of a blumpkin?
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Female 15,763
Psst Davy...

"Hey, did you fall from heaven baby, or does this smell like chloroform?"

;D

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Female 130
one I heard was "if you were a triangle, you would be acute" so nerdy but kind of cute :)
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Male 2,148
You must be Jamaican `cause Jamaican me boner. -DOB
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Male 27
do i know you?
no why
cause i think i want to

got me with my gf

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Female 779
I love nerdy pickup lines...

"I wish I could be your derivative so I could be tangent to your curves."

"Hey babe, wanna see the exponential growth of my natural log?"

Hahahaha

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Male 243
do they honestly cencor drat? why the drat do they censor drat now? this is horsepoo
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Male 243
drat
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Female 4,376
I`ve never had a pick up used on me actually but if I had I would`ve ignored it.
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Male 367
I guess Star Wars is about to come on because I see a 20th century fox right here. - For Comic-Con use.
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Female 1,566
@Asakura: I totally agree, I think it`s really funny and adorable when they`re not being serious about it, especially when they use a REALLY nerdy one. But it`s just awkward and creepy when they think it`ll actually work.
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Female 80
"Do you like water?"

"Yes"

"Well, then, you`ll like 70% of me ;)"

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Female 236
you all speak for yourselves. I think it`s cute when guys come up with them.

The only thing is, It`s kinda disgusting and creepy when they are being serious.

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Female 299
"Do you like math?" "Yes." "Well, let`s add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide our legs, and hope we don`t multiply!"
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Male 2,549
"Wanna sit on my lap and we`ll discuss the first topic that pops up?"

(GAH! It`s the most annoying, most overused and most repugnant line I`ve had the misfortune of being subjected to.)

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Female 465
How about: "Nice legs . . . What time do they open?"
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Male 2,893
I`m like a Rubics Cube, the more you play with me, the harder i get.
*facepalm*
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Male 46
haha i went threw a little phase when i woulg go up to girls on benches and pretend to groom myself like a cat and meow then stare right at the tits and say kitty wants some milk it was kinda a joke but it almost worked one time
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Female 256
Years and years ago, I was wearing a gold locket in the shape of a heart, and the clasp had broken.

"What`s wrong with your necklace?" he asked.

"Oh, it`s been like that for ages, I can`t get it to close."

"Well, I`ll fix your open heart if you want me to."

We were only thirteen at the time; as such, I hardly stopped myself from throwing up all over him with the sicklyness of it.

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Female 124
"Let`s play house. You can be the screen door so I can slam you all night long."

To which my friend responded with "And you can be the toilet, because you`re full of poo."

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Male 132
"98% of the bodys water hears a straw get sucking"


what?

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Female 285
Pick-up lines only work for us if you`re REALLY cute, REALLY sweet, and REALLY desperate. Not being a douchebag helps too.

On another note, #20 is win.

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Male 9,305
Whatever happened to being polite and decent? T_T
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Male 118
98% of the bodys water hears a straw get sucking
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Female 6
My personal favorite is:
*grabs someone`s butt*
"Oh, sorry! I thought that was mine."
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Male 177
19 got me my current girlfriend!
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Male 1,220
I believe that 20 should work in just about every situation actually.
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Male 610
i really like that outfit, but i`d like it better on the floor.
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Female 4,447
I`ve heard #19 by two guys who were trying to pick me up at the same time. I was 16 or so at the time and out with my family. Seriously fellas?
But my favorite recent one, and geekiest I`ve ever heard, "Why don`t you come sit on my lap? I need to practice for when I visit my girlfriend in Canada." And yes, this was uttered to me by a gamer.
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Female 519
Are you an angel? Because I have an erection. :D

Jingle bells one was my favorite.

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Male 569
20 ftw
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Female 73
If you were a booger, I`d pick you first.
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Male 619
Are you kidding? Those aren`t that bad. Here are 3 really bad ones.

1. That`s a pretty dress. It would look even better crumpled up next to my nightstand.

2. Drat me if I`m wrong, but is your name Cindy?

3. That shirt is very becoming on you. And if I were on you, I`d becoming too.

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Female 1,578
hahahahaha, bad but funny
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Male 53
"I`m not telling you this to impress you or anything... but, uh, I`m Batman."
whoever made this up...you are my hero
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Male 73
A great response to "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" is "Were you bored on the elevator ride from hell?"
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Male 156
Hey, I`ve always liked the "Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" one.
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Male 1,435
"Nice shoes. Wanna drat?" "I`m sorry, I forgot my pickup line. Mind if I sit with you until I remember it?"
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Male 1,598
Pick-up lines never work. Nobody is impressed by puns, especially if it`s obviously one you heard somewhere and copied.
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Female 94
If your right leg is Christmas, and your left leg is new years, can we meet between the holidays?
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Male 11
Word of the day is "Legs"... Now, Let`s go home and spread the word
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Female 1,589
Last one totally turned me on.
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Male 964
#20 is not too foreword at all , I`m gonna use it from now on!
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Female 36
The worst I`ve heard is definatly " Did you just fart? Cuase you totally blew me away."
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Male 12,138
My personal favourite, "Hey, do you have any Irish in you? No? Would you like a bit?"
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Male 29
I`m not telling you this to impress you or anything... but, uh, I`m Batman.
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Male 47
Pick up a goat, you`ve pulled
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Female 7
One time a guy gave me a big toothless grin and said, "mmm....i`d like to take you back to my huntin` camp."
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Male 3,369
Shocking..no mention of:

"Are your parents retarded? Cos your kinda special".

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Female 299
I texted "if you jingle my bells..." to my niece and nephew. We`re always to one up each other on the creep factor. :D
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Male 25,417
. “If you jingle my bells, I’ll promise you a white Christmas" This is a classic, but it will always work if you say you hav a 11 inch penis and then show it!
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Male 970
Link: The Top 20 Worst Pick-Up Lines Ever [Rate Link] - These are admittedly bad but I`ve used worse and I`m sure I-A-B ladies have heard worse than that. Share your best/worst
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