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Date: 12/09/09 12:31 PM

78 Responses to The Top 20 Worst Pick-Up Lines Ever

  1. Profile photo of SaintPatty
    SaintPatty Male 18-29
    970 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:27 pm
    Link: The Top 20 Worst Pick-Up Lines Ever - These are admittedly bad but I`ve used worse and I`m sure I-A-B ladies have heard worse than that. Share your best/worst
  2. Profile photo of Fatninja01
    Fatninja01 Male 30-39
    25420 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:40 pm
    . “If you jingle my bells, I’ll promise you a white Christmas" This is a classic, but it will always work if you say you hav a 11 inch penis and then show it!
  3. Profile photo of lockedup
    lockedup Female 18-29
    299 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:41 pm
    I texted "if you jingle my bells..." to my niece and nephew. We`re always to one up each other on the creep factor. :D
  4. Profile photo of The_Maddog
    The_Maddog Male 30-39
    3369 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:43 pm
    Shocking..no mention of:

    "Are your parents retarded? Cos your kinda special".

  5. Profile photo of deathbatchic
    deathbatchic Female 18-29
    7 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:45 pm
    One time a guy gave me a big toothless grin and said, "mmm....i`d like to take you back to my huntin` camp."
  6. Profile photo of hypergames
    hypergames Male 13-17
    47 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:50 pm
    Pick up a goat, you`ve pulled
  7. Profile photo of itsgeorge
    itsgeorge Male 13-17
    29 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 12:58 pm
    I`m not telling you this to impress you or anything... but, uh, I`m Batman.
  8. Profile photo of davymid
    davymid Male 30-39
    12140 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 1:13 pm
    My personal favourite, "Hey, do you have any Irish in you? No? Would you like a bit?"
  9. Profile photo of MissHollow
    MissHollow Female 18-29
    36 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 1:14 pm
    The worst I`ve heard is definatly " Did you just fart? Cuase you totally blew me away."
  10. Profile photo of bobhub600
    bobhub600 Male 13-17
    964 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 1:23 pm
    #20 is not too foreword at all , I`m gonna use it from now on!
  11. Profile photo of the_windy
    the_windy Female 18-29
    1589 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 1:25 pm
    Last one totally turned me on.
  12. Profile photo of Bosse007
    Bosse007 Male 18-29
    11 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 1:42 pm
    Word of the day is "Legs"... Now, Let`s go home and spread the word
  13. Profile photo of enirroc
    enirroc Female 18-29
    94 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 1:42 pm
    If your right leg is Christmas, and your left leg is new years, can we meet between the holidays?
  14. Profile photo of Jasonbobdude
    Jasonbobdude Male 18-29
    1598 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:00 pm
    Pick-up lines never work. Nobody is impressed by puns, especially if it`s obviously one you heard somewhere and copied.
  15. Profile photo of korahn
    korahn Male 30-39
    1300 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:01 pm
    "Nice shoes. Wanna drat?" "I`m sorry, I forgot my pickup line. Mind if I sit with you until I remember it?"
  16. Profile photo of yayforme
    yayforme Male 18-29
    156 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:04 pm
    Hey, I`ve always liked the "Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" one.
  17. Profile photo of Adthedude
    Adthedude Male 13-17
    73 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:18 pm
    A great response to "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" is "Were you bored on the elevator ride from hell?"
  18. Profile photo of apolloapk
    apolloapk Male 18-29
    53 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:33 pm
    "I`m not telling you this to impress you or anything... but, uh, I`m Batman."
    whoever made this up...you are my hero
  19. Profile photo of heartx3jess
    heartx3jess Female 18-29
    1578 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:33 pm
    hahahahaha, bad but funny
  20. Profile photo of SamVimes
    SamVimes Male 30-39
    619 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:41 pm
    Are you kidding? Those aren`t that bad. Here are 3 really bad ones.

    1. That`s a pretty dress. It would look even better crumpled up next to my nightstand.

    2. Drat me if I`m wrong, but is your name Cindy?

    3. That shirt is very becoming on you. And if I were on you, I`d becoming too.

  21. Profile photo of Kat29223
    Kat29223 Female 18-29
    73 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 2:56 pm
    If you were a booger, I`d pick you first.
  22. Profile photo of SLC77
    SLC77 Male 13-17
    570 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 3:09 pm
    20 ftw
  23. Profile photo of TBirdVBall
    TBirdVBall Female 18-29
    519 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 3:21 pm
    Are you an angel? Because I have an erection. :D

    Jingle bells one was my favorite.

  24. Profile photo of Ani187
    Ani187 Female 30-39
    4448 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 3:23 pm
    I`ve heard #19 by two guys who were trying to pick me up at the same time. I was 16 or so at the time and out with my family. Seriously fellas?
    But my favorite recent one, and geekiest I`ve ever heard, "Why don`t you come sit on my lap? I need to practice for when I visit my girlfriend in Canada." And yes, this was uttered to me by a gamer.
  25. Profile photo of last_ninja
    last_ninja Male 18-29
    610 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 3:27 pm
    i really like that outfit, but i`d like it better on the floor.
  26. Profile photo of FlameOfUdun
    FlameOfUdun Male 18-29
    1222 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 3:32 pm
    I believe that 20 should work in just about every situation actually.
  27. Profile photo of OMGitsJASON
    OMGitsJASON Male 18-29
    177 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 3:46 pm
    19 got me my current girlfriend!
  28. Profile photo of FakeEmpire
    FakeEmpire Female 13-17
    6 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 4:07 pm
    My personal favorite is:
    *grabs someone`s butt*
    "Oh, sorry! I thought that was mine."
  29. Profile photo of canda1985
    canda1985 Male 18-29
    118 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 4:19 pm
    98% of the bodys water hears a straw get sucking
  30. Profile photo of Nidonemo
    Nidonemo Male 18-29
    9308 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 4:20 pm
    Whatever happened to being polite and decent? T_T
  31. Profile photo of JTheGreat
    JTheGreat Female 13-17
    285 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 4:42 pm
    Pick-up lines only work for us if you`re REALLY cute, REALLY sweet, and REALLY desperate. Not being a douchebag helps too.

    On another note, #20 is win.

  32. Profile photo of iBegrindin
    iBegrindin Male 18-29
    133 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 4:52 pm
    "98% of the bodys water hears a straw get sucking"


    what?

  33. Profile photo of SabreTigre
    SabreTigre Female 13-17
    124 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 5:13 pm
    "Let`s play house. You can be the screen door so I can slam you all night long."

    To which my friend responded with "And you can be the toilet, because you`re full of poo."

  34. Profile photo of StarCallista
    StarCallista Female 18-29
    256 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 5:20 pm
    Years and years ago, I was wearing a gold locket in the shape of a heart, and the clasp had broken.

    "What`s wrong with your necklace?" he asked.

    "Oh, it`s been like that for ages, I can`t get it to close."

    "Well, I`ll fix your open heart if you want me to."

    We were only thirteen at the time; as such, I hardly stopped myself from throwing up all over him with the sicklyness of it.

  35. Profile photo of kajtaz
    kajtaz Male 18-29
    46 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 5:39 pm
    haha i went threw a little phase when i woulg go up to girls on benches and pretend to groom myself like a cat and meow then stare right at the tits and say kitty wants some milk it was kinda a joke but it almost worked one time
  36. Profile photo of GuardinGnome
    GuardinGnome Male 18-29
    2893 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 5:45 pm
    I`m like a Rubics Cube, the more you play with me, the harder i get.
    *facepalm*
  37. Profile photo of patticakes
    patticakes Female 18-29
    463 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 6:08 pm
    How about: "Nice legs . . . What time do they open?"
  38. Profile photo of Geogypsy
    Geogypsy Female 18-29
    2546 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 6:50 pm
    "Wanna sit on my lap and we`ll discuss the first topic that pops up?"

    (GAH! It`s the most annoying, most overused and most repugnant line I`ve had the misfortune of being subjected to.)

  39. Profile photo of lockedup
    lockedup Female 18-29
    299 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 6:51 pm
    "Do you like math?" "Yes." "Well, let`s add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide our legs, and hope we don`t multiply!"
  40. Profile photo of Asakura
    Asakura Female 18-29
    236 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 7:05 pm
    you all speak for yourselves. I think it`s cute when guys come up with them.

    The only thing is, It`s kinda disgusting and creepy when they are being serious.

  41. Profile photo of danddpony
    danddpony Female 13-17
    80 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 7:10 pm
    "Do you like water?"

    "Yes"

    "Well, then, you`ll like 70% of me ;)"

  42. Profile photo of leesah
    leesah Female 18-29
    1566 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 7:16 pm
    @Asakura: I totally agree, I think it`s really funny and adorable when they`re not being serious about it, especially when they use a REALLY nerdy one. But it`s just awkward and creepy when they think it`ll actually work.
  43. Profile photo of Sociophobic
    Sociophobic Male 18-29
    367 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 7:28 pm
    I guess Star Wars is about to come on because I see a 20th century fox right here. - For Comic-Con use.
  44. Profile photo of GothicQueen
    GothicQueen Male 13-17
    4376 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 7:59 pm
    I`ve never had a pick up used on me actually but if I had I would`ve ignored it.
  45. Profile photo of mcmonkeyman
    mcmonkeyman Male 13-17
    243 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 8:03 pm
    drat
  46. Profile photo of mcmonkeyman
    mcmonkeyman Male 13-17
    243 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 8:03 pm
    do they honestly cencor drat? why the drat do they censor drat now? this is horsepoo
  47. Profile photo of jadedtortois
    jadedtortois Female 18-29
    779 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 8:23 pm
    I love nerdy pickup lines...

    "I wish I could be your derivative so I could be tangent to your curves."

    "Hey babe, wanna see the exponential growth of my natural log?"

    Hahahaha

  48. Profile photo of alphaxomega
    alphaxomega Male 13-17
    27 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 8:45 pm
    do i know you?
    no why
    cause i think i want to

    got me with my gf

  49. Profile photo of ElDavo
    ElDavo Male 18-29
    2149 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 8:54 pm
    You must be Jamaican `cause Jamaican me boner. -DOB
  50. Profile photo of NanGoneBanan
    NanGoneBanan Female 18-29
    130 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 8:59 pm
    one I heard was "if you were a triangle, you would be acute" so nerdy but kind of cute :)
  51. Profile photo of opiebreath
    opiebreath Female 18-29
    15774 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 9:49 pm
    Psst Davy...

    "Hey, did you fall from heaven baby, or does this smell like chloroform?"

    ;D

  52. Profile photo of zucedamoose
    zucedamoose Male 13-17
    60 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 10:11 pm
    Hey babe,u ever heard of a blumpkin?
  53. Profile photo of maddux32
    maddux32 Male 30-39
    926 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 10:41 pm
    I wouldn`t want to have the woman who could be had with pickup lines.
  54. Profile photo of ImTakingOver
    ImTakingOver Male 18-29
    388 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 10:56 pm
    Is your dad a plumber? Cuz you`re the S H I T
  55. Profile photo of bastrid
    bastrid Female 30-39
    47 posts
    December 9, 2009 at 11:43 pm
    `Wanna make my snake throw up?`
  56. Profile photo of pvt10thva
    pvt10thva Male 18-29
    18 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 12:47 am
    Hi my name is Doug, that`s God spelled backwards with you wrapped up in it.
  57. Profile photo of tyrice
    tyrice Female 18-29
    72 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 12:50 am
    worst ever (on so many levels): "how do u like ur eggs in the morning? scrambled or fertilized?"
  58. Profile photo of Dogboy76
    Dogboy76 Male 30-39
    156 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 2:50 am
    Well it`s not a chat up line as such. I put my winky in her hand and then I start to cry. Strangely it hasn`t worked yet...
  59. Profile photo of Shellie84
    Shellie84 Female 18-29
    4197 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 3:23 am
    only one I`ve heard is `Hey come outside, I wanna show you something. Your friends will be fine, let`s go` And then he proceeded to drag me off the dancefloor outside til my flatemate almost knocked him on his ass.

    God only knows what would`ve happened had the creep succeeded *shudder*

  60. Profile photo of GummyWurmz
    GummyWurmz Female 13-17
    1412 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 3:39 am
    If you jingle my bells, Ill give you a white christmas
  61. Profile photo of Reignblazer
    Reignblazer Male 18-29
    2334 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 4:46 am
    Rofl dogboy >.<
  62. Profile photo of SilentFray
    SilentFray Female 18-29
    678 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 6:57 am
    One of my favorites:

    "Do you wanna f**k or do I owe you an apology?

    One of the guys from the shop asked a girl that and I almost died laughing at him.

  63. Profile photo of MrTwidget
    MrTwidget Male 30-39
    795 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 7:38 am
    "Can I push your stool in?" rofl
  64. Profile photo of davymid
    davymid Male 30-39
    12140 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 7:50 am
    "Hey, did you fall from heaven baby, or does this smell like chloroform?"

    Ah yes Opie, happy memories, good times of past lols.

    Remember this one? "Hey, I`m a rag and bone man. Now, you sniff on this rag while I give you a bone."

  65. Profile photo of B-b-beccah
    B-b-beccah Female 18-29
    668 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 8:53 am
    worst one ever used on me? "do you come to this Library often? *WINK*"
    ...wow.
  66. Profile photo of Mantistador
    Mantistador Male 18-29
    2200 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 9:29 am
    do pick up lines even work anymore... better yet, have they ever worked?
    "hey baby is it hot here? or is it you?"
    "oh my god i love you!"
  67. Profile photo of BunnyNaku
    BunnyNaku Female 18-29
    5224 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 9:33 am
    17, 18 and 20 ROFL
  68. Profile photo of Frankii
    Frankii Female 18-29
    437 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 3:06 pm
    "Polar bear."
    "What?"
    "Well it broke the ice!"
  69. Profile photo of Battousi
    Battousi Male 13-17
    30 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 5:28 pm
    1 time i walked up to a random girl to test if pick up lines worked,i was like "hey come here often?" which was stupid cause we were in a hallway..sadly it didnt work! GRR!
  70. Profile photo of Battousi
    Battousi Male 13-17
    30 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 5:32 pm
    sorry bout double postin but the best pick up lines come from your heart, 1 time out of the blue i told a girl "why you gotta be so beautiful,you put the other girls to shame" also i wouldnt call em pick up lines:)..cause they usually dont work,look at johnny bravo.
  71. Profile photo of alfietoon
    alfietoon Male 18-29
    1164 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 6:42 pm
    best: GUY: excuse me? but do you work in subway?
    GIRL: no why?
    GUY: because you just gave me a footlong *points at crotch*
  72. Profile photo of Eyedea
    Eyedea Male 18-29
    81 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 8:09 pm
    "if you were a gas in my lower intestine, i would never fart, in fear that i would lose you"
  73. Profile photo of imitchy
    imitchy Female 18-29
    6 posts
    December 10, 2009 at 11:54 pm
    Lol I like #7 and #20
  74. Profile photo of Shahar102
    Shahar102 Female 18-29
    517 posts
    December 11, 2009 at 9:34 am
    #10 happend O_o
    Loled at #11 P:
  75. Profile photo of Battousi
    Battousi Male 13-17
    30 posts
    December 11, 2009 at 1:07 pm
    1 time i walked up to a random girl to test if pick up lines worked,i was like "hey come here often?" which was stupid cause we were in a hallway..sadly it didnt work! GRR!
  76. Profile photo of ummmwow
    ummmwow Female 18-29
    12 posts
    December 11, 2009 at 8:38 pm
    Had a friend of mine get hit on by a pentecostal guy when we were about 16 at the restaurant I worked at. He came up to her and said, "Are you a Visa? Because you`re everywhere I want to be." Soooo tacky and funny. (Also, isn`t that American Express` slogan?)
  77. Profile photo of treble_head
    treble_head Male 18-29
    83 posts
    December 13, 2009 at 4:12 am
    Me, checking my wallet: Oh, F**K ME!
    Her: Oh, what`s wrong?
    Me: No, that was a request.
    Her: F**K YOU!
    Me: That was what I was driving at.
    Me: OWWWW....

    dames don`t appreciate post-modern sexism.

  78. Profile photo of kittilia
    kittilia Female 18-29
    500 posts
    December 18, 2009 at 11:47 pm
    garanteed to get you slapped.

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