Natural Harvest Cook Book (OMG! *Gag*)

Submitted by: trippyhippy9 8 years ago in Weird
http://www.lulu.com/content/4956212

The most disgusting cookbook you"ve ever seen. Definitely the WTF of the Day. Don"t use these recipes for Thanksgiving.
There are 136 comments:
Male 176
I didn`t realize there was so much taboo about eating semen.
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Male 176
I didn`t realize there was so much taboo about eating semen.
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Male 176
I didn`t realize there was so much taboo about eating semen.
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Male 176
I didn`t realize there was so much taboo about eating semen.
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Male 176
I didn`t realize there was so much taboo about eating semen.
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Female 895
I think i`m gunna puke. What one man a woman and a horse do in the bedroom should not be brought the the kitchen. lol ;)
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Female 77
This would be kind of funny as a novelty gift :P I`m not at all surprised that people would dedicate a cook book to this sort of thing... But semen definitely doesn`t have a "wonderful texture". Eewy xD
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Male 27
oh my gosh, I thought it had to be a joke till I read the comments... I will never eat another glaze covered cinnamon roll...
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Female 187
omfg, I am feeling a little queezy bout now.
maybe I shouldn`t have read the comments on the page, and gone to see what putrescin was....brupppp.omg.....
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Female 163
also, incredibly fattening!
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Female 163
hah, gross...
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Female 1,697
I think I`m gonna puke and then cook a flan with it.
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Female 1,516
The taste of a man`s "sauce" depends on what he normally eats and can vary from sweet to very bitter, so I wonder what kind you are supposed to use... not... that I would know about that... *ahem*
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Male 5,194
Male 2,855
if we eat something that came out of a chickens butt, i guess this isnt as bad
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Male 1,164
recipe number 4 salty yoghurt D:
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Male 474
"Mom: Come on son, daddy worked very hard with me to make this special soup for you."
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Female 62
OMG I had to stop at the creamy cum crepes...*heave*
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Female 56
Those crepes actually look really good until you realise what`s in them.
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Male 2,553
omfg
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Female 1,211
Oh sick.
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Male 413
go on darling.... its good for you
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Male 86
This isn`t the grossest cookbook I`ve seen. I remember "Cooking with Balls" from a while back.
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Female 741
Creamy Cum Crepes, it`s a funny name, but..disgusting.


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Male 242
mylostdog, random I know, but your profile says you write. I do too, and you seem pretty cool, let me if I can email you so we can chat! ;)
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Male 339
semen is the main ingredient in lots of my dishes
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Male 788
Creamy Cum Crepes? HAHAHAHA cook some of these up for your roommate! hahaha
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Male 1,556
icecream2269, For a second there I thought you were my volunteerism teaacher.

This is gross.

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Male 446
I`m saving up for the Young Coconut Curry Cream with Prawns. Only 7 more tablespoons to go!
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Female 471
oh my god. laughing. my. ass. off. the comments on the page are priceless. my favorite so far:

Topic: pregnate
Can sperm in taco make babby in girl stomach if she eats?
Re: pregnate
Ahhh yes, that is the age old question. What came first, the baby? Or the semen in the taco in the girls stomach?

this is making my night..

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Female 471
suprised it doesn`t mention STDs at all
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Female 1,579
well its sales rank is like..1000 something! thats either 1000th in place or its sold 1000 of them haha! wow.. thats pretty gross...but there are people who eat rocky mountain oysters and i see that being the SAME thing
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Female 523
Is this a joke?
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Female 687
"spit of swallow?"
"swallow it`s NUTRICIOUS :D"
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Male 807
I only time I used semen, is when I ran out of egg whites ;)
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Male 2,313
If you eat fast food, chances are you`ve come close to this.
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Male 64
creepy thats all i can say
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Female 357
the picture...

JELLIED SPERMS YAY!

xlucyx

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Male 107
has anyone ever had semen before?

its delicious, fyi.

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Female 326
this f`ing cookbook made me hella paranoid. Sick, sick people.
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Female 446
uhm. that can`t be sanitary.
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Male 1,085
Must add the salty flavor to foods i ate in Mexico. They can unload like crazy!
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Male 1,540
Now I can do away with the tissue box.
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Female 198
Some of those comments seemed very real.
I shall never eat at anyones house but my own now.
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Female 1,652
ew.
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Female 460
What the drat?!
"..semen remains neglected as a food.."
Well no duh! It`s NOT food, dippoos.

Those perverts in the comments on that page need to get their `manhoods` removed. Really.

And what about AIDS and HIV? drating perverts.

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Female 22
can`t believe it.
it`s too good to be true.
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Female 917
Please tell me that was a joke.
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Male 1,086
*Godzilla facepalm*
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Male 115
Well I guess those Sperm Banks have a market for all the ugly/stupid people semen now.
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Male 8,300
OMFG I was so grossed out when a veggie friend once invited us to tea (dinner for you yanks) and served up carrot casserole, tofu burgers and pumpkin icecream - now I realise I got off lucky!
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Male 2,395
I`m sorry, semen? O_o

This just changed what I think about desserts...

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Female 4
Whoa, that`s... that`s... just wrong.
WHO DOES THAT? Is it even legal to feed a person "seman" without telling them? I may never eat Flan again. |-(
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Female 15,763
Oh.. oh dear god the pictures in the pages of the food.. YOU CAN JUST TELL WHERE THE SPERM IS!
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Female 2,220
BAHAHAHA

The first sentence just cought me off guard.
SO effing funny,

Best comment:::


prengant [ No Rating ] 21 Nov 2008
by HObart B
Can sperm in taco make babby in girl stomach if she eats?

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Male 452
that sounds like something my girlfriend would eat.. she`s crazy about BJs
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Male 483
you know, when i read the comments, before looking at the page, i really thought everyone was exaggerating.

oh my god was i wrong. i feel quite sick right about now

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Male 1,036
Your penis would fall off before you could serve custard for four.
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Male 2
"Thank god for this book! For years I have been slipping my secret sauce into all different types of food and beverages at my home and while at work at the local Chuck E. Cheese. The kids really seem to love their pizza when it is covered with my "secret sauce". Some times I can see a mother with that "I know I have had this taste in my mouth before" look on their face.
I am planning on having some of my OMC clan members over my house for a night Monday night football. I was planning on serving them some tostitos with salsa that I milked my manhood into. Do you think I should give the salsa one or two squirts of semen?
I really want to thank you for helping me realize that squirting my stuff into unsuspecting people food is perfectly normal!! Lets do lunch someday ..... my treat!!"

this is one f&cked up dude!

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Male 2
the people who bought this book and posted a review are crazy!
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Female 931
What the dratting hell?
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Female 462
OH MY dratING GOD.
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Male 2,076
I choose to believe that the people selling this book are not ok.
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Male 285
spookybee, i actually almost saw that video the other day, then realised how bad it could be and didnt start it.
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Male 2,160
hmm...i´d rather not.
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Female 188
(o_0) whaa?

reminds me of a porn i saw recently... cum omlette ring a bell anyone? I almost wretched! Porn should not make you puke. that`s the wrong kind of porn. I highly suggest NO ONE go looking for that video. I mean it!

on a side note, my husband said if i wanna try any of those recipes, he`s here to help.

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Male 118
Oh god...

When I read the Chuck-E-Cheese comment, at first I laughed because of the mom thing, but, when I thought about it, I threw up in my mouth just a little bit...

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Female 385
I choose to believe that MrFibbles is joking.
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Female 385
uh, i`m so igh- i dont even know what to say, plus, why did all the comments speak about using it secretly? uhh, AIDs much? uh, also, i really thought and hoped that ut was at least not human, cause that wouldnt be SOOO bad, (peeps eat goat balls) and ew
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Male 503
read the comments, their so funny even if some might be serious
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Female 721
The comments made me laugh. Except the one by the guy who supposedly whacks one off on Chuck E Cheese pizza. Now I`m going to be paranoid every time I bring my cousin there.
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Female 1,963
Urgh. As much as it might be fine to ingest in certain situations, using it as food would just be pretty much the most disgusting thing I could think of. Semen on turkey *shiver*
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Male 13,630
It does go on, there was an Indian resturant local to me in the UK which got closed down by health n safety, they found 6 different um....bodily fluids from different cooks in the korma!!!! Blah!!!
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Male 2,004
ancb yeah but serving it on a pizza for children thats worse than wrong
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Male 176
I didn`t realize there was so much taboo about eating semen.
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Female 1,071
Oh. Oh. Oh. My God.

I got nothing on this one...

*SCARRED FOR LIFE*

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Male 176
Sounds good to me! I see a very special tapioca in my girlfriend`s near future.
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Female 4
oh my jesus drating christ this is nauseating! seriously after reading the comments i am never eating something someone gives me or going out to dinner ever again...and never bringing ANY of teh children i babysit to chuck e cheeses that disturbed person squirting his junk into little kids pizza is just WRONG...and i dont want aids so YAH

i mean seriously

WTF!!!!!!!!

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Male 1,718
However this made me sick.
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Male 1,718
Harvest moon happened to be one of the best gameboy games. I have all 3. The recipies are just a bit odd.....
STILL HARVEST MOON IS WINNNN!!!
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Female 328
Okay. That`s it. Game over. I`m never eating anything anyone gives me ever again.
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Male 1,468
O.O Holy poopies.
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Female 4,447
....no comment.
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Male 205
I have been flipping through the many strange things that come across IAB for a while now, but this made me sign up...

It -requires- a comment, but at the same time that comment cannot be a comment, because that would mean knowing how to even respond to... just... no...

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Male 101
sýɥʇ ʞɔnɟ
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Male 2,004
wtf is wrong with humanity.
it was better in the old days when food was food without a manhood sauce
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Male 311
Outside of simply swallowing it, as I usually do, or as one does with a can of whipped cream and their head roostered back, can anyone think of any innovative and tasty ways to prepare raw, uncooked semen?"
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Male 311
"I am a proud Vegan and am working my way towards complete fruitarianism. I have a preference for live foods ("raw" to those uninitiated).

I am aware that semen is a byproduct of a creature with a nervous system, but I am intrigued by the protein possibilities of semen for vegetarians, and its ready accessibility for me.

Leaning towards fruitarianism, I also like the fact that semen can be procured naturally, like a ripe apple that drops from a tree; it is its natural time to come...
And if Lacto-Ovo Vegetarians can eat eggs, then semen is a simple step away...

Ultimately, I am also interested in the idea of harvesting semen, semen farms, and semen husbandry.

I would be very interested in any semen recipes that make use of the live ingredient, preferably fresh and hot, so that it retains its optimum level of nutrients and taste.

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Male 1,140
here`s a creepy bit of info that scares me... ALOT

"One of our long standing traditions is to ejaculate all over the turkey before thanksgiving dinner. I am very proud to say that I was able to pass the torch of this honor to my 11-year-old son Tyson this year. Understandably, he has been in and out of therapy his entire life (as have the other 5), and despite this, I am very proud of him."

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Male 1,078
I call fake.

Funny though.

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Male 301
thats disgusting, and i laughed at the "creamy cum crepes"
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Female 519
Haha, I love the reviews for this thing.

"The kids really seem to love their pizza when it is covered with my "secret sauce". Some times I can see a mother with that "I know I have had this taste in my mouth before" look on their face. "

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Male 1,140
"whats for dinner tonight mom?" "chicken and your fathers special sauce"
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Female 723
Of all the years lurking...THIS is the link that made me create an account! I expected that the foods were going to be made of human breast milk, but seriously...

I really didn`t need to know this. *paranoid*

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Male 1,835
"Ok you know what with this and the Mother `Flushed Newborn Baby By Accident` I am thinking of abandoning IAB for something safer like the LOLcats website."
you`ll be back, they always come back...

man, now we just need a cookbook with `squirt` and it`s complete.

"vvv Might I reccomend 4chan? I hear it`s a internet-renowned cultural center of decency and class."

XD i got banned off 4chan

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Male 1,835
"Ok you know what with this and the Mother `Flushed Newborn Baby By Accident` I am thinking of abandoning IAB for something safer like the LOLcats website."
you`ll be back, they always come back...

man, now we just need a cookbook with `squirt` and it`s complete.

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Male 3,301
vvv Might I reccomend 4chan? I hear it`s a internet-renowned cultural center of decency and class.
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Male 24
Ok you know what with this and the Mother `Flushed Newborn Baby By Accident` I am thinking of abandoning IAB for something safer like the LOLcats website.
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Male 4,393
semen?!?!?
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Male 122
And this is only the begining...

It`s only a matter of time until the rising demand for "cooking supplies" outpaces supply.

From there it`s only a short hop to government-run "milking" facilities where the future man-cows will be selectively bred for the high volume outputs.

Existing only to add to a corporate bottom line, these men will be force fed large quantities of pineapple, or other specific foods which will greatly enhance the palatability of their output. The facitities will certainly resemble expansive dairy farms, as fiscal pressures, specifically as Wal-Mart enters the market, force small family suppliers out of business.

And all I want to know is, where do I sign up?

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Male 1,226
"All of the recipies in this book have been tested by the author or friends of the author"

That worries me...

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Male 311
*fap*

what? im cooking

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Male 559
"come to think of it, how did you manage to find this link trippy hippy?"

Strangely enough, I found it on a gaming forum.
Final Fantasy XI players are strange.

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Female 4,225
"now get your two cups of seman and poor the spermys in the batter"

...ewww....


""But , if your a vegan, just make sure the seman is from a guy that had a vasectomy(sp?)"

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Female 660
DO.NOT.WANT!!!
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Male 14
thanks for ruining my lunch IAB!
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Female 662
Oh god, those comments. I just died from laughter.
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Male 460
the comments are the best, but some were pretty disgusting. i think some people actually bought the book like that vegan guy
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Male 83
come to think of it, how did you manage to find this link trippy hippy? :-)
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Male 83
there`s always someone that has to cross the line. this is really wrong... and when he says `semen remains neglected as a food` does he not know that semen ISN`T food and never has been.
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Male 324
this honestley made my day suck but im listening to stairway to heaven so i feel better
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Male 2,199
"Thank god for this book! For years I have been slipping my secret sauce into all different types of food and beverages at my home and while at work at the local Chuck E. Cheese. The kids really seem to love their pizza when it is covered with my "secret sauce". Some times I can see a mother with that "I know I have had this taste in my mouth before" look on their face.
I am planning on having some of my OMC clan members over my house for a night Monday night football. I was planning on serving them some tostitos with salsa that I milked my manhood into. Do you think I should give the salsa one or two squirts of semen?
I really want to thank you for helping me realize that squirting my stuff into unsuspecting people food is perfectly normal!! Lets do lunch someday ..... my treat!!"

I almost died of laughter from this comment

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Female 357
bleh. I can`t imagine eating that much at one time
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Male 3,301
Actually, this is a problem as semen is harder to come by (pun intended). A blown load isn`t all that much from a culinary perspective.
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Male 2,788
Zing.
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Male 2,788
creamy cum crepes....
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Male 737
Obviously, it`s a GAG.

hahahahahahahahaha

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Male 762
Someone was looking at the links i was posting on the OF last weekend :-P
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Male 276
who the hell would create these?
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Male 686
God dammit these people should burn in a fire.
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Female 151
Creamy Cum Crepes
sounds... delicious?!?!
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Male 742
AHHHH MAN
JUST HELLL NO
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU
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Female 340
lmao! that`s awesome! imma buy it!
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Male 1,370
OH GOD *vomits* WHY?!?!


wait...who figured these recipies out in the first place?!

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Female 140
the oyster picture was pretty gross to look at knowing whats there
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Female 43
I don`t even have a comment.
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Male 756
....
The recipes wouldn`t even taste good. o_o

They`d all be too salty.

XD

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Male 2
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! DISGUSTING!
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Male 7,933
well, isn`t this a family meal?
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Male 337
well my g/f likes it from the source and raw.
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Male 7,378
I swear officer it`s in the recipe
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Female 14
Thats pretty gross...
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Male 92
"Semen is inexpensive to produce"

They`ve got a point.

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Male 629
Well that is one way to make cooking fun...
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Male 2,788
AWWWWWWWWWWWW DUDE NOOOOO!!!!
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Male 559
Link: Natural Harvest Cook Book (OMG! *Gag*) [Rate Link] - The most disgusting cookbook you`ve ever seen. Definitely the WTF of the Day. Don`t use these recipes for Thanksgiving.
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