How To Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting To Kill You

Submitted by: GiantBatFart 8 years ago in Funny
http://www.catswhothrowupgrass.com/kill.php

An illustrated guide that"ll help you figure out if your cat is plotting your demise.
There are 48 comments:
Male 103
mr.kittensworth would never harm me... would he...?
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Male 165
There is a 100% chance of my cat plotting to kill me and i don`t even have a cat!
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Female 78
There is a 93% chance my cat is plotting to kill me.

I KNEW IT!

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Female 1,436
That was pretty funny. I hate cats so I say we kill them all
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Male 47
I took the quiz and answered no to everything and it still said I had a 72% chance my cat is going to kill me. I am glad to find another time waster to entertain myself while I do nothing.
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Male 12
The test told me my cat was dangerous... :(
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Male 2,553
this is why i dont have a cat.
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Female 97
<a href="http://www.heyquiz.com/quiz/cat_kill"><img src="http://www.heyquiz.com/bimage/14_87.jpg" alt="Is your cat plotting to kill you?" /></a>
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Female 1,329
Also, when cats bring home dead animals, their not actually gifts. Cats think that we humans are stupid at hunting and need to be taught how to hunt and capture prey.
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Female 15,763
My cats are more like dogs... it`s weird.
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Male 499
My cat have done all of these.. at the "bring dead animals" he killed two of my chinchillas about the same size of him..

Scary...

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Male 162
haha thats funny. everyones cat is plotting to kill them!
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Male 650
that was dumb
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Male 16
Yes, my cat must be close. He`s brought home 5 dead birds, and one partially alive, just to have me watch him torture it to death of how he will kill me.
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Female 213
My cats fight a lot... I think they`re fighting about who gets my heart once they kill me.
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Female 917
My kitty also tries to trip me when I walk by...

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Male 2,422
Our cats would never kill us if only for the simple reason that humans make very effective servants and they are too lazy to do all the stuff we do for them. That`s the only reason we are still alive...
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Male 2,395
No, you can tell if a cat`s trying to kill you if you find a gun hidden in the litter box :P
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Female 34
all three of my cats are plotting O_O BRING IT ON BITCHES!!
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Female 449
Mine is partly planning to kill me :O
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Female 462
Cuuuute.
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Male 1,086
I have no cats and my friends have dogs :)
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Male 2,004
i think my brother`s cat totally going to kill me
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Female 70
Oh good, I needed this.
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Male 3,296
f ucking cats, i knew it!!, <kills cat>
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Male 1,232
Cat`s are awesome. Well kittens are, cat`s suck.
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Male 985
If im dead in 2 weeks... you know why.
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Female 1,652
My cats do all but the last 3
O.o;;;
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Female 497
im a kitty cat <33
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Female 2,026
lol thats good. cats scare me anyway, my auntys cats always pounce on me :S
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Male 330
ha ha ha, this is the funniest thing ive seen in a while.
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Male 1,148
haha that one [and some of the others] was awesome!!
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Female 2,289
Sadly I don`t have my cats anymore. *tear*
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Male 9,305
"It`s not a gift, it`s a warning."

HAH! XD

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Female 4,039
Awww they`re cute even when they`re going to kill you!
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Female 1,984
*dies* Ah, they got me! Oh wait.. I`m dead. *silent*
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Female 228
we are screwed.
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Male 1,894
I have two cats, and came up with an easier way to tell if your cat is plotting to kill you.

Is it breathing? If yes, then it is plotting to kill you.

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Male 225
I am so dead.
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Male 1,226
Oh noes I think I`m gonna die...
If I don`t post another reply in a week...you know what happened...please kill my cats...
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Male 94
I heard this on NPR. If a single person living alone in an apartment dies, a dog will wait seven days before the dog starts to eat its owner. A cat will wait seven hours before it starts to eat its owner.
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Female 214
Oh poo!!! I`m gonna die!!! But thats okay, as long as my murderer is cute and fluffy. :D hee hee
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Male 167
I Have like, 5 cats! :-)


Wait!

OMG! I`m DOOMED!! :-O

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Female 721
Yep, I`m dead.
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Male 506
My cat`s trying to kill me.
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Female 688
Well apparently every cat I`ve ever had has in one way tried to kill me.
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Male 10,440
<--- oh I know all about that.
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Male 6
Link: How To Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting To Kill You [Rate Link] - An illustrated guide that`ll help you figure out if your cat is plotting your demise.
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