10 Things Dad Never Told You About Sex

Submitted by: Lionhart2 8 years ago Weird
http://www.justaguything.com/10-things-your-dad-never-told-you-about-sex/

1 in 400 men can satisfy themselves orally!?!? Did I need to know that?
There are 86 comments:
Female 5,222
hahaha the little cartoon about "pacing yourself" litterally made me LOL
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Male 247
"...nobody wants to find out their girlfriend has a scat fetish after the fact."

No truer words have been written.

Hey GothicQueen, let me get this right:
You "find it rather ironic that for men to get to the 1 spot that could make them feel really good they have to face there own fear and shatter their fragile male ego and put a finger in there rectum."

Yet, you end your post with "I sure as hell don`t want anything near there."

Um...yes, neither do some of us; has nothing to do with egos, fragile or otherwise, has to do with not wanting a finger shoved into our POOP hole. It`s a choice, not an issue of fear nor ego.

You seem bitter, maybe you should try anal beads, LMFAO, jk. But really, lighten up.

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Male 2,553
The last two i did NOT need to know.
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Male 1
lionhart, the "menage a trois" meaning in your dreams is a joke... wow.
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Female 143
why would a man want to pleasure himself orally? doesn`t he realize how bad cum tastes?
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Female 188
well i`m never gonna look at a banjo the same way again.
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Female 43
i already knew all of the ten things and im not even a man. . .though sometimes i think i am ;-)
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Male 31
1 am one of those 1 in 400 men that can satisfy me self. :D
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Male 8,302
> From the link article
> Ménage á trois” is actually French for “In your dreams”

Two seconds web research turns up: French - ménage = household + à = for + trois = three. Now I`m not sure I believe anything the article said, so I`m not going to worry about my d*ck exploding any more. Besides, if it didn`t after all the work it got when I was 20, chances are it aint gonna now!

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Female 110
lol
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Male 94
Dirtbox... hilarious. Ron Jeremy is 4 in 400 men.
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Male 1,835
XD so true

banjo string? never heard it as that

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Male 2,395
Exploding penis? yikes >_<
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Male 34
Damn nature and its twisted designs! Why must the G-spot be up our rectums?! Why?!!! On the upside at least gay people get something out of it.
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Male 949
Ditto, Pasbasa. And I`m not really flexible, if you catch my drift.
Interesting list. Perhaps a NSFW tag at some of the images?
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Female 4,376
>mmmm nice try but noo


umm...nice try what?

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Male 904
ouch at the banjo string...oouch
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Male 848
I`m scared of an exploding penis now. I am going "strong" catholic now.
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Male 2,028
My parents literally didn`t even tell me anything. Not even how people have sex. I suppose they decided to let the school teach me or something, but they didn`t anyway, and I somehow just gained the knowledge years ago, but I don`t know where from.
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Male 3,296
"Well so does giving yourself a handjob everynight but i`m sure you do that.

I don`t see anything really wrong with it actually I just don`t think it is probably very comfortable and I guarantee it doesn`t taste that good. meh.


And as far as the male g-spot goes I find it rather ironic that for men to get to the 1 spot that could make them feel really good they have to face there own fear and shatter their fragile male ego and put a finger in there rectum. But honestly i`ve been told that if you enjoy it and can get past the fear it is really good. But some guys still don`t like it and that`s fine. Not everyone likes the same thing. I sure as hell don`t want anything near there."

mmmm nice try but noo

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Male 285
b-b-b-banjo string? ... that alone almost makes me want to claim abstinence ..
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Female 4,376
>HungWell
>Being able to suck your own dick kinda makes you gay


Well so does giving yourself a handjob everynight but i`m sure you do that.

I don`t see anything really wrong with it actually I just don`t think it is probably very comfortable and I guarantee it doesn`t taste that good. meh.


And as far as the male g-spot goes I find it rather ironic that for men to get to the 1 spot that could make them feel really good they have to face there own fear and shatter their fragile male ego and put a finger in there rectum. But honestly i`ve been told that if you enjoy it and can get past the fear it is really good. But some guys still don`t like it and that`s fine. Not everyone likes the same thing. I sure as hell don`t want anything near there.

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Male 9,306
Boombox, is this jealousy over those who can? Denouncing something because you can`t enjoy it? Sour grapes?

I remember hearing somewhere that someone made premarital sex a sin because he couldn`t get any.

Also, #1 comes as no surprise.

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Female 497
i hate guys like him hes so pathetic sex is suppose to be really special thats why his dad didnt tell him about drating fetishs because he knew he had an non-nice individual son that would try to drat every women he could and thats just gross no girl wants a handy down
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Male 7,378
if i could do that i would be unemployed and homeless
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Male 4,867
so that guy telling us to shove a finger up our asses??

no thanks

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Female 47
the #3 picture was hilarious :D
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Male 777
*Smugly raises his hand at number 2*
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Male 41
I think I heard on VH1 that the lead singer of Three Dog Night had his penis pop like a balloon on him.

Good gravy I hope that never happens to me.

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Female 18
"`Being able to suck your own dick kinda makes you gay `
Kinda makes you gay? It makes you gay. (Without the kinda)."

How is that any different than fondling your own penis?

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Female 25
I already knew all this shiz. Not because I have a good (or bad,depending on your personal views) father,but because of my copious amount of time of the internet.

Good stuff,none the less

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Male 1,232
"Being able to suck your own dick kinda makes you gay "

Kinda makes you gay? It makes you gay. (Without the kinda).

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Male 410
Being able to suck your own dick kinda makes you gay
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Female 254
Best quotes:
Ménage á trois” is actually French for “In your dreams”.
All these years I’ve been performing the sexual equivalent of stuffing a turkey.
Haha.
I also read t`other day that a man of 25 spends, on average, one half of the entire night of sleeping with an erection. At 65, this becomes one fourth of the night. With an erection. Never knew that.
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Male 162
penis explodes???? OUCH!
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Female 1,984
"if you`re just having sex for pleasure then you might as well be bisexual."
So you`re saying bisexuality is synonymous with promiscuousness? Gee... thanks a lot. -_-

"Come on...Wheres the one girl that doesn`t agree? 8("
Not me - I concur.

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Female 1,984
"It turns out she got a real sexual kick out of having bugs, insects and creepy crawlies all over her genitals and wanted to share this delightful experience with me."
I know about fetishes... but this one is... *blanks out on a good word*

"the sad reality is that the threesomes we could have would most often involve not another woman, but another man."
Uh... not true for me. ^_^ *laughs*

"A lot of guys don’t even think about her pleasure during sex because it’s so easy to get lost in the moment."
Completely agree!

"Men have a G-spot too"
Yeah, I knew that.

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Female 4,376
Same opie. I didn`t know weeners could explode.

I know far to much about sex because i`ve been reading cosmopolitan since I was 11 lol

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Male 374
Wow I`m 1 in 400! :D
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Female 15,763
No, it`s good, Andro. The only thing I didn`t know was the penis exploding thing.

It just means that you`re educated.

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Male 756
...
It`s sad that I knew all of this already.
...


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Male 1,788
6. If you`ve ever seen old seinfeld episodes, they`re not lying, there are moves.
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Male 1,788
1. Jerking yourself off is not gay
2. If you could suck yourself off, I`m just gonna throw it out there that you probably wouldn`t.
3. Come hither motion
4. If you finger/rub her while doing the dirty deed simultaneously, congratulations, she`s going to come...a lot.
5. Learned all the things on that list not from my parents, but through hilarious experiences, and a little trial and error.
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Male 81
SO ITS TRUE!
I WAS doing it right. I see even more great times ahead...
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Female 4,197
:o female g spot is no myth! I`m with the girls on this one
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Male 3,819
"What do I care peloos, its not MY g-spot."

EXACTLY my friend, exactly. That`s the spirit.

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Male 639
okay personal story time.
i am really really lucky, i as a guy am dating the girl of my dreams.
i love everything about her. it is only a plus that she loves sex as much as any guy.
all of that article is VERY true. i learned the same things in much the same way as the author.
btw-male g-spot; crazy awesome, never thought id like it, my girlfriend decided to "experiment" w/o me knowing, turns out its a big turn on for her...
anyway, female g-spot no myth, overrated, yes: our best times dont even involve it.
guys-respect your girl, dont try to be the porn star stud
girls-you guys are awesome, keep teasing (we secretly like it)

im done
pointless; yes

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Male 8,302
> peloos12
> Ur doing it wrong.

What do I care peloos, its not MY g-spot... (Whack)

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Male 3,301
"wwch, my banjo string D:"

Twing twang. Lets play dueling banjos!

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Male 543
wwch, my banjo string D:
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Male 3,819
Lionhart -


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Male 90
Come on...Wheres the one girl that doesn`t agree? 8(
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Female 2,258
I`m going to have to go ahead and agree with both Sun and Opie...
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Male 90
Oh my god sex isn`t like pornos!
Oh well at least life is still like action movies and cartoons ...
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Female 15,763
I`ll join you in that parade, Sun.
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Female 204
"it must be just the FEMALE g-spot that`s a myth."

Well I can`t speak for every girl, but I know for damn sure it is not a myth.

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Male 3,301
"oooh oooh and I can lick my penis"

Pabasa, you are now IAB comment winnar of the month.

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Male 8,302
Next time you go to a church or concert or whatever with 2000 men in the crowd, you`re not going to be looking at them the same way any more... And the male G-spot... didn`t know that... it must be just the FEMALE g-spot that`s a myth.
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Male 807
If I could self fellate, I prob. would do it.
Straight male, no homo.
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Male 2,245
if you think about it, that whole male G-spot thing, if you`re just having sex for pleasure then you might as well be bisexual. and please i`m not trying to start any kind of an argument, it`s just a statement.

and congratulations pilanus... i guess.

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Male 1,263
Penis...explosion....

Talk about awkward.
(and painful ><)

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Male 674
1 in 400? damn, my talent is rare...

as for the whole male G-spot... I think that straight men are safe until it happens for the first time...

A lot like masturbation really, you never thought of it much when you were a little kid, but when you discovered it, it became an addiction.

anyways, Bisexuality ftw.

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Male 2,245
"I can`t do it but sucking yourself off is about as gay as jerking yourself off."

to quote Chris Griffin, "Is it lonely up there on your pedestal?"

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Male 976
screw self-oral, I`m more conserned about my FREAKING WANG EXPLOADING.
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Male 2,313
I can`t even touch my toes, so I think it`s safe to assume...
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Male 1,468
I`m not one of the 400..:C
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Male 4,793
:gag:
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Male 3,819
I figured opie, but a guy can always dream...
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Female 15,763
I think that would be a LOT harder, Pel.
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Male 868
I can`t do it but sucking yourself off is about as gay as jerking yourself off. Just pointing that out there before a homosexuality debate spawns.
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Male 57
abby, the thought that those 1/400 are the same people who can link their elbow sends a shiver down my spine.
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Male 3,819
I think the more important question is:

How many women can go down on themselves?

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Female 1,313
So does that mean that 1 in 400 people can also lick their elbow?
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Male 57
We have found the chosen one!
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Male 112
LOOK MOM NO HANDS!!

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Male 3,819
"And really, if you`re straight, your prostate might turn you gay."

::cringe::

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Male 4,012
oooh oooh and I can lick my penis, if I do some extreme stretching. Does that count?
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Male 3,819
5 years too late IAB...thanks a lot.
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Male 57
Negative, thats 3/400
And some of these scared me D:>


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Male 4,012
Dad never told me about these things, but I figured them out by myself anyway. Not sure if I had any children I`d be giving em these advice too...

And really, if you`re straight, your prostate might turn you gay.

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Female 1,212
"Im not one of the 400"

Good lord, thanks for sharing, pat! I don`t need that image before bed. lol

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Male 180
............................................
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Male 1,497
Me neither, that`s 2/400 so far...who`s the lucky IAB-er who can?
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Female 15,763
I expect a homosexuality debate spawning off the g-spot for men one.
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Male 1,766
Im not one of the 400 :-(
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Male 8,302
Link: 10 Things Dad Never Told You About Sex [Rate Link] - 1 in 400 men can satisfy themselves orally!?!? Did I need to know that?
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