Rockin' in the free world since 2005.

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Category: Funny
Date: 08/27/08 06:02 AM

42 Responses to Top 50 Chuck Norris Jokes

  1. Profile photo of 1CrazyURL
    1CrazyURL Male 30-39
    264 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 3:43 am
    Link: Top 50 Chuck Norris Jokes - Remember never to laugh at Chuck Norris though...Chuck Norris will make you kick your own ass.
  2. Profile photo of alice_x
    alice_x Female 18-29
    5143 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:06 am
    "When Chuck Norris falls out of a boat he dosn`t get wet the water gets Chuck Norrised"

    lmao!

    "Some kids piss their names in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in concrete."


    omg these are brilliant! XD

  3. Profile photo of rott3n_
    rott3n_ Male 18-29
    5 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:09 am
    i cant take any more chuck norris facts. it redefines the concept of "old meme".
  4. Profile photo of malikymoo
    malikymoo Female 18-29
    2029 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:10 am
    ive seen this stuff everywhere! still dont know who he is lmao
  5. Profile photo of andrewgaynor
    andrewgaynor Male 18-29
    371 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:17 am
    young Chuck norris used his hands and his feet!
    and he kicked and he punched with his hands and his feet!
  6. Profile photo of aadia
    aadia Female 18-29
    17 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:19 am
    Ahhh, brings back memories of warcraft. lol
    I`ll be right back, gotta go to the store to stock up on Red Bull :P
  7. Profile photo of techgeek07
    techgeek07 Male 30-39
    2594 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:31 am
    They once wanted to put chuck norris` face on Mount Rushmore but, the granite wasn`t hard enough for his beard.
  8. Profile photo of handsomefag
    handsomefag Male 18-29
    296 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:31 am
    a little old perhaps?

    hes a great man, but i dont see whats so tough about an actor that acts tough :/

  9. Profile photo of Alexcools
    Alexcools Male 13-17
    180 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:34 am
    nice
  10. Profile photo of Akurei-Inu
    Akurei-Inu Female 13-17
    91 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:36 am
    X.X who`s Chuck Norris????
  11. Profile photo of techgeek07
    techgeek07 Male 30-39
    2594 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:38 am
    Chuck Norris was an actor back in the 70`s 80`s and 90`s
  12. Profile photo of techgeek07
    techgeek07 Male 30-39
    2594 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:38 am
    wow Akurei, that is an evil looking wolf
  13. Profile photo of oddflame
    oddflame Male 18-29
    193 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:52 am
    They`re not jokes, they`re facts. :D
  14. Profile photo of Earlyman
    Earlyman Male 30-39
    164 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 7:07 am
    The revolving door was the first one i remember..... "CN can kick you in the back of the face!" "There is no evolution, only a small list of creatures that CN allows to live."
  15. Profile photo of Demonplaya
    Demonplaya Male 13-17
    66 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 7:50 am
    pfft replace chuck norris with fancylad
  16. Profile photo of gingernut333
    gingernut333 Female 18-29
    1071 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 8:16 am
    "Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding."

    ROFL!

  17. Profile photo of megavidiot
    megavidiot Male 30-39
    901 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 8:27 am
    I always loved these jokes...
  18. Profile photo of hey_jenn
    hey_jenn Female 13-17
    7 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 8:41 am
    I`m surprised that website isn`t down...

    There`s so much awesome in so little space.

  19. Profile photo of Fox4Brawl
    Fox4Brawl Male 13-17
    233 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 8:51 am
    I replace Chuck Norris with "Captain Falcon"

    it makes everything 10 times more epic

  20. Profile photo of modernbenoni
    modernbenoni Male 70 & Over
    1114 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:08 am
    They REALLY aren`t the best Chuck Norris jokes...

    Buy the book, it has way better ones, it`s the only book i`ve read more than 3 times.

    Way worth it.

  21. Profile photo of thestringy
    thestringy Male 18-29
    483 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:38 am
    wow i never thought i would find a collection of jokes that rubbish.
  22. Profile photo of murrymalty
    murrymalty Female 18-29
    2676 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:48 am
    a penguin once pooped on CN`s head...
    and now they can`t fly :D
  23. Profile photo of shelerella
    shelerella Female 18-29
    160 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:53 am
    They forgot:
    Once a unicorn made Chuck Norris angry, and that is why they don`t exist anymore.
    ;-)
  24. Profile photo of murrymalty
    murrymalty Female 18-29
    2676 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:54 am
    OMG!
    type "Find Chuck Norris" in on google and press "im feeling lucky" ROFL
  25. Profile photo of Winter_ICE_0
    Winter_ICE_0 Male 13-17
    976 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 10:44 am
    they also forgot:
    Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection... there were no survivors.
  26. Profile photo of dave32891
    dave32891 Male 18-29
    542 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 11:33 am
    haha there is no ctrl button on his computer because he`s always in control.
  27. Profile photo of iluvfood
    iluvfood Male 13-17
    324 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 12:51 pm
    in my opinion only 2 celebrity`s will be good enough to create their own religion chuck norris and oprah
  28. Profile photo of iluvfood
    iluvfood Male 13-17
    324 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 12:52 pm
    chucks last name does note show up as a real wored on spell check that poor bastard
  29. Profile photo of opiebreath
    opiebreath Female 18-29
    15782 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 1:08 pm
    I`ve never had superman underwear, and I`ve always really wanted some... D:

    And isn`t Chuck like, surprisingly short or something?

  30. Profile photo of dragonshadoz
    dragonshadoz Female 18-29
    4033 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 1:13 pm
    Am I the only one getting sick and tired of this Chuck Norris joke thing? It`s getting old. Very old. And irritating.
  31. Profile photo of petey112
    petey112 Male 13-17
    358 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 4:36 pm
    lol
  32. Profile photo of petey112
    petey112 Male 13-17
    358 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 4:40 pm
    chuck norris fought bruce lee and learned from him, but in the fight chuck got his ass kicked
  33. Profile photo of petey112
    petey112 Male 13-17
    358 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 4:41 pm
    hahahah murray
  34. Profile photo of d_katman
    d_katman Male 13-17
    1836 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 5:00 pm
    the only reason chuck norris jokes exist is because bruce li is dead

    did chuck norris just kick apart a kangaroo?
    i do believe george washington did that first,
    http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm...

    georgeWashington._height = 20 stories
    chuckNorris._height >= 6foot

    georgeWashington > chuckNorris

  35. Profile photo of iluvfood
    iluvfood Male 13-17
    324 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 6:18 pm
    dude i just gotroudhouse kicked in the chest sparring like 15 minutes ago
  36. Profile photo of Octillion
    Octillion Male 18-29
    228 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 7:36 pm
    Yes, yes, Chuck Norris "facts" are getting old, but they are still hilarious!
    Chuck Norris once took a vacation to the Virgin Islands. Now they`re just the Islands.

    If through some weird time paradox, Chuck Norris were to ever fight himself, he would win.

    The highly toxic cyanide ion is represented by CN-. Which also happens to be Chuck Norris`s initials. Coincidence? Probably not.

    Chuck Norris can eat a Rubik`s cube and crap it out solved (yeah i know this one sucks)

  37. Profile photo of jenneh
    jenneh Female 13-17
    460 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 8:02 pm
    Holy crap murrymalty.


    I think I found my new screensaver! xD

  38. Profile photo of spookybee
    spookybee Female 30-39
    190 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:28 pm
    ok, who all tried the google one on page 2?

    Go to Google and type in "Find Chuck Norris" Then Click "I`m Feeling Lucky"

  39. Profile photo of sugarhyped
    sugarhyped Female 18-29
    329 posts
    August 27, 2008 at 9:58 pm
    ^just did that. lol.
    Chuck Norris` tears can cure cancer; too bad he has never cried.
    that is like one of the first I ever heard.
  40. Profile photo of taitai
    taitai Female 13-17
    63 posts
    September 27, 2008 at 3:16 pm
    spookybee, lmfao i tried that it said "Google won`t search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don`t find Chuck Norris, he finds you." haha thats funny =]
    btw who is chuck norris? i mean like is he some superhero or sumthing? or juss some crime fighter in a show.....? i`m not orginally from the u.s. so i wouldnt know
  41. Profile photo of MastaPlan23
    MastaPlan23 Male 13-17
    76 posts
    February 8, 2010 at 8:55 pm
    chuck norris can do the moonwalk FORWARD!
  42. Profile photo of MaiaTewai
    MaiaTewai Female 13-17
    38 posts
    August 23, 2010 at 8:09 am
    @taitai
    Hes from a show called Walker,Texas Ranger and is has a lot of movies, he`s an kick ass actor

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