Peanut Butter = God?

Submitted by: woomanfoo 8 years ago in Weird
/media/34695_PeanutButterGod.flv
Because humans evolved in the amount of time it takes to open a jar of peanut butter.
There are 74 comments:
Female 1,199
Haha I don`t believe in total evolution but even I find this ridiculous. You can`t compare a jar of peanut butter to the earth...
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Male 341
wooooooow so this is the newest attack on evolution? this is just sad. I hope this is just a joke.
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Male 3,255
@iceblack

The laugh track was actually dead on. Every time they said something ridiculously stupid it laughed. It was perfect.

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Male 3,255
I honestly love whoever runs this site. It`s about time a community existed that didn`t cater to the religious, and honestly its not even anti-religion. Look at this video! Atheists and Theists can come together and laugh and the ignorance in this one!
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Male 928
The origin of life has nothing to do with evolution. Evolution is what happens after life is created.
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Male 27
This is the kinda guy you will see on the streets in a few years, running around with a jar of peanut butter yelling "This is science! This IS evolution!!!!" And then he gets arrested.
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Male 548
yes, life can arise from simply matter. i wrote a paper about this year.

The classic experiment demonstrating the mechanisms by which inorganic elements could combine to form the precursors of organic chemicals was the 1950 experiment by Stanley Miller. He undertook experiments designed to find out how lightning--reproduced by repeated electric discharges--might have affected the primitive earth atmosphere. He discharged an electric spark into a mixture thought to resemble the primordial composition of the atmosphere. In a water receptacle, designed to model an ancient ocean, amino acids appeared. Amino acids are widely regarded as the building blocks of life.

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Male 897
WTF WITH THE CANNED LAUGHTER???
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Male 3
also, obello, the bible teaches that god created all life, just as it was meant to be. that`s a creationist idea. there is no evolution because god placed everything here just as it is. dinosaurs do not exist, just a coincidence. according to the bible, god placed us how we were meant to be, so we cannot evolve.

more ramblings, but if evolution does not exist, why is it that five hundred years ago, the average height for a male was around five foot four. now, it`s closer to six feet tall. that`s evolution, even if it`s not what most think of. hell, the fact that there are different races. Blacks, Whites, Reds, Yellows... the surviving traits bred, so in africa, the black were best suited. they survived. in europe, whites were best suited, in the orient, the yellows, and in america, the reds. we all started from the same stock, but we evolved separately. otherwise, there would only be whites. basketball would be boring, and golf would reign supreme.

dumb.

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Male 3
1: the bible is a book that was written by human hands. keeping this in mind, it is flawed. i don`t care what you think, god did not put pencil to paper and start writing. to believe in the bible utterly is foolish because of the raving inconsistencies.
2: fattpill, you say that if all atheists were to believe... well, how do you force yourself to believe something? i can tell you, when i hear stupidity i immediately disregard it. religion does the same to me. also, which religion should we follow? you tell me that your religion would take me to heaven, but several others do the same thing.
3: evolution produces new life forms, which is in contrast to the bible. yay for contrast. evolution takes what was there, and changes it. take any reproduction. your parents give birth to you in a process that involves the mixing of TWO sets of chromosomes from different people, because that way you are not carbon copies. asexual reproduction even has place for change.

dumb.

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Male 256
Just to get the comment straight. I mr. heath Believe because I love Jehovah and Jesus and the Holy Spirit. NOT i repeat NOT for Fear of hell. I reply to these atheist clips because i fear hell for the ones that are going there. it is really going to suck and it is NEVER going to let up. eternity people!!!! for ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever. it is never going to let up. you have only this one chance to do it right. now is the time. not in the smoking section. really no body ever answers that question. How much would your life change if you repented and came to service of Jehovah God. just take the time to Observe. do you really believe that christianity would be this popular if it were just a Fad? really people wake up. now is the time. REPENT turn away from evil and to Jehovah God.
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Male 242
Canned laughter = gay...
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Female 451
i hate this video.
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Male 30
Toxicshark: I think that Genesis is true, but explained so that the people of the time can understand. One must remember that according to the Bible, God lives outside time. Would the people of the time just accept evolution or that living things could have started out as simple molecular compounds? They would it consider it just as much a fantasy as you consider Christianity. God still could have started the chain reaction of life.
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Male 485
is that really even an argument against evolution...?
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Male 504
Peanut Butter is not a god. FSM is the only food that is a god. But FSM is a false god. While Peanut Butter is not a god, it is good.
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Male 85
That was terrible, the damn laugh track that is.
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Female 465
well that was... retarded... lol peanut butter plus light equals `new life`...
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Male 1,013
There`s a better version with the same title in youtube w/o the cheesy laughter. It`s no wonder that someone that believes in that murderous deity also believes that peanut butter does not evolve, eventhough they give it only a few years and the medium has enough salt content to stymie any biological life. According to the bible, god has killed more people than have ever lived... a good god, I think not. Peanut butter good, definitely!
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Male 4,246
When whatsisface held up the jar and said "Now, you may smile at this, but...." I was not smiling. In fact, I was fighting off an intense feeling of alarm.
That creationists would try using peanut butter as proof that everything just magically appeared less than 10,000 years ago....and that some people really seem to believe it.....I think I feel an anxiety attack coming on. :-/
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Male 73
the energy and mas thingy is actually legit though. Learned it in Bio. It explains that the first "living" things were just molecules stuck together with the help of lightning and stuff. You can actually make carbon compounds by subjecting non-biological elements to electricity.
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Male 1,111
"We never encounter new life."

"Bacteria resistant to antibiotics?"


That`s not new life, that`s life that has adapted and built an immunity. Unless you`re trying to say when humans build immunities or tolerances that we are new life.

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Male 109
btw, large objects do attract other objects. in fact, small objects attract other objects. any object with mass will attract any other object with mass. so technically, you were being attracted by that building, just by a very very small amount. gravity only really begins to take effect when it comes to things like stars and planets. (you probably knew all of this anyway, but there was an opportunity for me to sound smart and i took it)
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Male 522
Do these people just pretend to be that stupid for the benefit of other stupid people or are they actually that stupid?
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Male 522
Gravity teaches us that large objects attract other objects but I was standing by a really big building today and it didn`t attract me at all. I could totally walk right by it. Therefor gravity is a crock.
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Male 109
hold on?!?! you`re allowed to pick and choose which parts of the bible you want to believe, and then discard everything else?? how? i thought you must either believe in the bible fully or not at all. isn`t that the point?
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Male 227
i hate how ppl assume to believe in evolution is to be an atheist...

evolution only stands in conflict with the belief that all life on earth was made in one week. that`s all.

if you only believe a literal interpretation of the Bible, then evolution would disprove God, but like me, many ppl don`t take the Bible %100 literally.

plus ppl who are desperate to take the Bible literally will cling to any half-assed idea that agrees with them

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Female 59
I like peanut butter.
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Male 70
Stuped laugh track made me so PO`d!
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Female 6
ruswat,
Being a good person will not get you to heaven. "There is no one righteous, not even one" (Romans 3:10b).
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Female 49
it didnt make me consider the creation of life or the existance of god, but it DID it made me hungry... now wheres that peanutbutter....
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Male 772
Last I checked, evolution didn`t include a theory on the origin of life, it only showed the changing of life over time.

How it started is explained in the primordial soup model, but even then the matter involved was organic molecules like Carbon, Oxygen, Methane, and Water. Use THOSE, not peanut butter, with enough energy and you could theoretically create life.

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Male 75
I dont see how it was THAT funny, laugh track guy....
I mean, im sure there are some, microscopic forms of life in peanut butter, besides we arent born in a plastic jar.
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Male 410
Ha! Believe, otherwise you could go to hell! Hmm ... isn`t that pretty much how it all started?

Also, I`m glad the laugh track was there, so I knew when to laugh ... especially the parts that weren`t funny ... laughing absurdly makes me laugh.

I smell peanutbutter and pine now. Strange.

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Male 2,600
"we will all die so what chances do you want to take. if atheist are so smart why are they taking such a stupid chance."

Are you saying you believe because you fear Hell, fattpill?

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Male 256
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh more stupid atheist crap. oohhhh puhlease make it all go away i am in a habit of coming to iab but it is starting to suck really bad. so what you have your beliefs and i have mine. we will all die so what chances do you want to take. if atheist are so smart why are they taking such a stupid chance. how much would all atheist lives change if they believed in God.
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Female 731
the problem here is, these "arguments" are dircted towards gullible, easily swayed sections of the population, with the suggestion of "idiot power", people who have more than borderline intelligence deride this stuff for good reason, adding a laugh track was moronic.
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Female 360
wait....what?
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Female 298
I couldn`t stand the laugh track so I turned it off.
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Female 1,306
ugggg. some parts the laugh track was added in at werent even funny.

also, about 70% of the funny parts flew right over my head. oh well, onto the next video *fwoosh*

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Male 59
Neither side can prove anything. The infinite reality of universal consciousness is so much more complicated than "instant insects just add water". Or a magical invisible man sprinkling fairy dust on a lump of clay or dust (given dialect). Guess what happens when you die. You die,thats it, get over it. Primates.
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Male 6
Evolution happens over thousands of years. Their (the christians featured in this video) blind faith towards religion should only mirror for a blind faith in science. They believe a book that was written thousands of years ago as opposed to what scientists have hypothesized today with our modern technology and research. Their reasoning is quite simply absurd.
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Male 205
"one analogy explained it as waiting for a tornado to pass through a scrapyard and produce a fully functional Boeing 737 jetplane."

Which is perfectly reasonable if you had so many scrapyards that their amount was close to infinite

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Male 7,933
Ruswut, the Bible goes against unlawful murdering. If it is justified then it is ok.
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Male 2,486
I`m offended, I was born out of a Jiffy peanut butter jar.

What a f*cking non-nice individual.

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Male 648
well, the video does this poorly, but its making the case that evolution disregards biogenesis.

the principle of biogenesis states that life must be created from life, and not non-life. In other words, bacteria don`t sprout off of the surface of a bare rock.

With that in mind, you cannot make a bacterium by zapping primordial goo with lightning (matter+energy=life). If this was possible, you could repeat this process...but as far as I remember, all attempts to do this have failed (I could be wrong on that).

I think experiments got as far as amino acids, which are materials for organic proteins and such, but hardly reaches the complexity of even a simple prokaryotic bacterium. one analogy explained it as waiting for a tornado to pass through a scrapyard and produce a fully functional Boeing 737 jetplane.

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Female 15,763
Okay, that laugh track... couldn`t watch it all.
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Male 115
wow let`s make a false base of evolution, then disprove our false base wrongly, and still say that it immediatly proves evolution wrong. that`s how everything should be dealt with. "black people are dumb, because peanut butter isn`t black, oh that proves it"
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Male 397
laugh track ruined it
as if i cant lol on my own
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Male 9,306
Okay the laugh-track distracted me. I can`t tell what he`s trying to say.
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Male 1,036
The laugh track was pretty good.
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Male 551
Was he expecting to find a
dinosaur inside the jar, just
because it had "matter" on it?

This is so stupid, and if they
are going to add the laughs
couldn`t they do it right?

They were so random, not even
according to the video. So stupid

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Male 2,506
STOP POSTING THIS FCKIN BS!!!@

I DONT CARE ABOUT EVOLUTION OR ANY FCKIN BELIEFS
NO MORE THEIRIES NO MORE OF ANY OF THIS poo! PLZ!!!!!!!

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Male 1,266
Oh & a question to any pissed off outspeaking christians... If self sacrafice gave you the edge to getting into heaven (assume good people go the heaven, bad to hell and this final act was one of enough love to get you classed as good) what if you sacraficed your chance of getting into heaven by killing a man who was about to kill all your family and hundreds of other people? (you know for sure he will and killing him is the only way, lets say he was about to push a button). You die straight after killing him, do you go to heaven because of self sacrafice or hell due to the fact that you sacraficed yourself & for it to be a sacrafice you have to lose something (your soul)?

Now consider if this situation actually occured after you`d concluded you`d go to heaven for doing it. Would it be self sacrafice or has having good foresight cursed you to going to hell for killing someone & thinking you`d go to heaven for doing so?

Seems a bit vague & inconsistent with the all m

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Male 1,231
This was a joke, poking fun at creationism. Anyone who reads more in to it is a moron.
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Male 4,867
^peanut butter and banana sandwiches toasted are amazing
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Male 4,290
"We conduct over a billion experiments a year"

What a retard. Does anyone minutely examine their peanut butter for single-celled life each time they open it? No. So you can`t say there was no life in the jar if you didn`t check.

And even if there wasn`t, it has no relevance at all.

It makes me embarrassed to also call myself an engineer if this moron is one.

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Male 1,266
Energy + Matter = Life?? Who the hell said that? Now if you get all the correct conditions together, have a few millions years to spend and the correct materials for a favourable reaction to create a simple random biological single celled plant life form then you get life...

But honestly first the banana arguement and now the peanut butter one? Is food all christians think about?

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Male 51
wow his logic against evolution was really retarded and am not sure if this was for atheism or against it i guess the laughter was saying how ridiculous it all was
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Male 4,867
gd point brokenjohn
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Male 219
Fake laughter sucks.
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Female 2,196
The laughing was so annoying
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Male 4,867
OMFG
im ordering 10 crates of peanut butter now
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Male 464
"We never encounter new life."

Bacteria resistant to antibiotics?

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Female 649
o_O uhm. okay...?

whatever dude...

you and your jar of peanut butter

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Male 464
"Evolution teaches that energy plus matter can produce life."

What the fuuck?!

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Female 583
Dude...the manical laughter at the end was so freaky...
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Male 207
his logic hurts my brain
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Male 2,601
wtf?
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Male 2,616
I thought the laugh track made it even funnier.
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Female 513
I really, really, really can`t stand the canned laughter.
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Male 20,169
Yes, yes, I know it`s old and you`re very cool for pointing that out, genius. But since this was submitted about 500 times, I green lit it.
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Male 533
Link: Peanut Butter = God? [Rate Link] - Because humans evolved in the amount of time it takes to open a jar of peanut butter.
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