Keeping Certain People off the Internet

Submitted by: buddy 10 years ago in Funny
http://www.defectiveyeti.com/iacaptchas/

Mandatory grammar test before you can enter the internets (click ""Try Another"" for variations).
There are 95 comments:
Female 58
Enjoy the porn!

Yes I do.

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Female 1,652
"enjoy the porn"

you mean the free 30 second clips that even a four year old can get to?

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Female 32
johannaxstar i hate it 2 TyPe LiKe ThIs i dont reli no wot 2 tell them like stop tryin 2 confuse me!! n thank u for the porn. ahahaha... its cos im kwl
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Female 53
Personally, I hate it when people: TyPe LiKe ThIs!!!!!!
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Male 18
i would set up a site for captcha answers =P.
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Female 105
What about a filter for "plz" and "lol"?
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Female 165
Heheh.
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Female 351
but that was so easy, who the hell wouldn`t pass something like that? well actually, i know quite a few people who wouldn`t having said that. we should get this implemented and keep the dumb-asses off the internet! who`s with me?
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Female 673
How pretentious.
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Male 425
I definitely like the affect that this is gonna have onlin.

To many pepole would not aprove this, but they must learn proper grammer and spelling.

Rite?

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Male 629
Seriously, there shouldn`t be any reason to not have correct grammar and spelling on forums. In games, sure no one cares about grammar unless you tak liek dis.
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Female 98
too easy.
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Female 178
this is bull.

I put in "you are" and it told me that I am now blocked.

drat the internet.

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Female 1,065
Keeping illiterate morons off the internet, only people that can read should enjoy the pron :D
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Female 127
"Spelling iz mi bezt subgect"
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Female 127
DAM!!! I DESPISE YOU SOCIETY!! All day at school I have to spell everything correctly, and the only time I can misspell is on the internet, and even THEY criticize my spelling now!
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Male 217
thats all ko unless you`re lexdyscic
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Male 2,216
Nah, the one that annoys me is people not knowing how to use a posessive apostrophe, ie "BURGER`S" or "Let`s get pizza`s!"... no!!
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Female 560
i feel like an idiot now
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Male 701
pft. all i can say
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Male 472
i speed definitely wrong ;/
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Female 406
lolzors i pasd wit fling culerz, i gat et after thee 100th tym. Yeah you can tell I did that on purpose. Yeah. Uh. Yeah.
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Male 132
"Enjoy the porn!" I will, and thank you very much, Mr. Internets.
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Male 888
I think you should also be instantly disconnected from the internet if you write in caps or spam exclamation/question marks.

U NO WAT I MEEN!?!!!!!!!!!!???????????????????

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Male 425
To be authorized to even communicate in a language one should be required to pass a much more difficult grammar and spelling test, not just a simple question to be allowed on the internet. I can`t stand idiots.
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Male 127
Holy crap. This is a better breakthrough then that one about the monkey and that robot arm!

Should indefinitely be implemented!

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Male 10
You guys are forgetting one very important thing. Is this program going to distinguish between American English (written in the US and most of Latin America) and the Queen`s English (written in Canada, the UK, Australia, and well pretty much the rest if the English writing world). You know, tyre = tire, behaviour = behavior, and so forth.
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Female 88
i passed. woo.
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Female 419
That got repetitive.

I do get annoyed when people typ lyk dis!!11! and use incorrect terms. I stick to correct grammar because it makes things easier to read and understand.

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Male 528
OMG HAX TRICK QUESTION!!!!!!!11
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Male 870
[quote]On 4/6/2007 2:54:40 AM jebler wrote: i hope whoever made that feels realy good about himself for spelling better then me. i really dont care. spelling is trivial. im not someone who follows a rule just because its old. [/quote]LOL. Did you fail the test, jebler?
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Male 374
That was awesome.
I did the wrong one once, to see what it would say.
It said: "I`m sorry, you are not allowed on the internet. Why not read a book?"
Below, it had a dictionary, English for dummies and... I forget the other one.
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Male 506
[quote]tht was crap[/quote]

Obviously you didn`t pass. B-|

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Female 302
hmmm i dont think "bad spelling" and "condensing words" to type faster is a problem.

What kids need to understand, is that there is 2 type of english. The everyday english and the proper english.

Like you can wear your freaking polka dot pants on the street all you want... just not go to work with it if you are a lawyer...

Language is in "evolution" as much as you think its going from good to bad, your good was once bad too. your "can`t" was once "can not" and so on... as every language change depending on where you are (colour and color for example) its normal that when you are on the internet, there a modification of the language.

I am for it, just as long as kid understand there is 2 type of languages, things should be fine, which inst the case now, ask any teacher ^^

*DISCLAIMER: after comments about my bad english, I now need to tell people its not my native language. Now you know I`m not a retard, just love to learn ma

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Male 732
Wow, Jebler, you just officially outed yourself as an idiot!
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Male 382
That gave me a warm feeling of fuzzy happiness.
If this was implimented, the internets would be a better, happier place.
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Male 2,616
the one that pisses me off the most is "your an idiot." IRONY
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Male 126
This truly needs to be implemented. The one that pisses me off most is people using "their" or "there" for "they`re."
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Female 4
i WISH.
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Female 110
enjoy the porn!
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Male 643
People with bad grammar should be ass raped daily.
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Male 148
The Internet would die if this happens.

I got "Their, There, and They`re"
Personally I would type like crap on purpose to just piss everyone off.

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Male 2,616
this is awesome... incorrect word usage by people on the internet is one of my biggest pet peeves
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Female 1,463
tht was crap
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Female 4
ah, if only. one of my pet peeves are when people use then instead of than, or when they use should of instead of should`ve. So basic, yet so many seem to lack any sort of gramatical skill.
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Male 1,866
hooray I`m in!!
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Female 1,470
Lol
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Female 109
eh, if i can`t understand what someone has typed i just ignore it because it must not be that important if it`s typed in such a bad manner.
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Female 601
Ha, if only there were ways to keep those people off of the internet.

Maybe spelling/grammar doesn`t matter on the Internet, but it matters everywhere else. If you get into the practice of using bad grammar, you`re going to use it everywhere, which isn`t good if you want a decent job or education.

ppl hu tipe lyke dis need to die, not just be restricted from the internet.

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Male 738
I want this enforced.
Now.
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Male 374
YaY My GrAmmErr Iz KOoL
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Male 552
NO WAI!!!1
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Male 76
I`m thinking this idea would keep several of our members from commenting...
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Male 213
yes we should implement this err I mean noooooooo ths is lk whoreible
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Female 8
Wow, imagine the internet without idiots!
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Male 1,825
thank you 2nd grade english grammer class
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Male 302
That would cool if it was real.
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Male 181
I`ve been waiting to long to see this happen.
But in a serious note, notice how just about EVERYBODY is using proper grammar and spelling in the comments


i noticed that as well man. lol

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Male 1,364
i won and i will enjoy the porn
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Female 91
I think I stayed there for TOO long.
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Female 10
Theres more to life than spelling and grammar
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Male 1,420
I`ve been waiting to long to see this happen.

But in a serious note, notice how just about EVERYBODY is using proper grammar and spelling in the comments

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Female 106
I wish this were real.
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Male 284
It shalt be added to the achive
wonder if this would get rid of the damn Roffelcopters. Roffelwaffels however can stay
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Male 1,024
I DO ENJOY.
REGULARLY.
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Male 103
Easy of course
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Male 577
I don`t care how bad people`s grammar and spelling is as long as I can understand their message. It`s gotten so bad that sometimes I seriously can`t, though. I hope people pay closer attention when they`re writing papers and stuff.
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Male 151
there must be a typo, arcade fire are awful.
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Female 6
spelling and grammar is all good, but in fairness not everyone finds it easy. as long as you can understand what is actually being said it shouldn`t be a big deal. also this is what spellcheck was invented for.:-D
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Male 286
Congratulations, and welcome to the World Wide Web!

Enjoy the porn!

yay :-)
i wonder if jamal jones could pass it :-P

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Male 902
YA RLY!!!eleven111!!!one!!eleventy!1one.!
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Male 453
ORLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
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Female 56
Its/it`s confusion is hardly the worst you see on the internet... we should be kepping off ppl who type lyk ths an intentially mispell evry wurd, an maby the ppl who ad tuns of excalmatin marks to evertin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Female 1,496
I agree, who gives a crap about spelling and grammar? Although, if you make fun of someone else for their grammar and spelling you have to be spot on yours. Also, if you are trying to flame someone and you use improper grammar and spelling your are a douchebag poohole that deserves to be shot in the head at close range.
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Male 902
Would`ve been better if it was an actual test instead of little one-shots. And I didn`t see any spelling questions, just pick the homonym questions. If it did spelling then most of the internet would immediately explode, along with all of you, whether you want to admit it or not. I only did five or six though, so it may have tested spelling as well.
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Female 129
Sweet chicken, kids! I`m allowed on the internet!

Probably has something to do with my slight grammar nazi tendencies.

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Female 345
I just read this and did one of those quizzes linked here afterwards. Guess what the result of that quiz was: "Your complicated, blablabla ..." :-)

It would be funny if it wasn`t so sad.

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Female 1,228
I think people should stop being so lazy and learn to spell in the first place.

Yes, yes, the porn will add to my collection,mwhahahaha

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Male 4,012
oh you definitely need a lot more of these tests to make the internet idiot proof.
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Male 210
Simple, Simple!
I still have these tests in school.
Guess I just never will be able to enjoy the porn.
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Male 2,372
The one I see a lot, which drives me nuts, is "should of" instead of "should`ve", as in "You should of been there."
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Male 916
I agree with Delfette. Some people don`t care about punctuation at all, not realizing that this carelessness will make their messages sometimes totally undecipherable.
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Female 30
That was so simple. I dont understand how some people can`t define the difference between; where, wear and were. Wasn`t everyone taught that in primary school?
My pet hate is people miss-using dose and does.
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Male 1,647

Delfette: Not to mention things like business letters, resumes, college papers, and simple respect for yourself and from other people...

Sorta like not wearing pink pants with red polka-dots.. jebler`s saying he`d wear it because it`s there, when most other people understand the reasons not to.
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Female 173
Jebler: "...i really dont care. spelling is trivial. im not someone who follows a rule just because its old."

Well, this is true to a point; Sometimes, I have NO idea what someone is trying to say BECAUSE his/her spelling and grammar are both so poor.

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Female 854
Wow that was dumb!
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Male 38
Seriously, they should make a law that requires anyone that wants an internet connection installed to take this test.
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Female 96
Haha, seriously that should be implemented. Those were all very simple rules that people learn in elementary/middle school. The only excuse for not knowing those is if you`re in elementary/middle school!
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Female 57
i shall enjoy the porn VERY MUCH.;-()
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Male 1,142
i hope whoever made that feels realy good about himself for spelling better then me. i really dont care. spelling is trivial. im not someone who follows a rule just because its old.
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Male 4,246
Hahahahaha!! :-D
I can`t wait for the locals to start complaining about the criticism of their grammar and spelling.
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Male 89
Brilliant...now if only it were actually used... :( One can hope, one can hope...*sigh*
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Male 170
Lol. "Enjoy the porn."
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Male 503
This will be useful in the YT Journals.
Thanks, Buddy.
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Male 10,115
Link: Keeping Certain People off the Internet [Rate Link] - Mandatory grammar test before you can enter the internets (click ``Try Another`` for variations).
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