What Guys are Really Thinking

Submitted by: digitalmaste 10 years ago in Funny
/media/77236_whatguysarethinking.flv
The secret of how the male brain works. Warning: adult themes. NSFW.
There are 105 comments:
Female 93
ahahahahahaha
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Male 250
in response to wey_pooh:
I can tell toy right now I do truly love her, to the point that I want her to be happy, regardless if I am her bf or not...
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Male 250
if thats average, than I am an anomaly...
could rant...
want to rant...
but you get my point...
I really am offended by this, but I chose to watch it, so I won`t say anything...
(no, I`m not gay... yes, I have a girlfriend... yes, I am waiting...)
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Female 401
If males are really like that then drat that. I mean about the sex stuff... The "i love you" is pretty gay...it seems like anytime a girl sleeps with a man she thinks she loves him. w/e...
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Female 52
"Lol sounds like you`ve got him whipped there Slain, good job on training a pussy."

^^^ oh, what, cuz he`s good to her means he`s a pussy without a backbone?

no, means he actually cares about her, hence the fact that they`re engaged

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Female 52
"Pff, yeah. So any guy who`s not just like you isn`t a real man. Nice superiority complex you got there."

^^^^ i agree. dont you hate men that are like that? and ya know.. want to stab them in the face?.. yeah.. i do >__>

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Female 48
LKJSlain he`s a keeper =)
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Female 48
what makes you think girls would like that?
Could you imagine having someone shove something up your ass. ouch.
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Female 920
Ugh...
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Female 11
This was the dumbest thing I have ever come across... I feel like a part of me just died while watching this. -_-

I hope you guys agreeing to this video aren`t being serious.

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Male 1,111
Sad or not at least they`re not a retarded emo
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Female 184
D: Anyone who thinks like that. Is a sad sad individual.
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Male 572
funny i think like that
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Female 679
Ummmmm...
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Female 281
LMFAO!!!!! I LOVED the last one!! That was awesome!
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Female 23
Haha! It would be funnier if it wasn`t seemingly true.
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Female 108
hahahah "as soon as she can learn to swallow without gagging, and learn to take it up the ass without crying"
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Male 35
i dont know what to say

i cant complain because its true

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Male 732
Wey_Pooh: You are a sad, pathetic person!
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Female 673
Pff, yeah. So any guy who`s not just like you isn`t a real man. Nice superiority complex you got there.
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Male 2,510
Ha ha, American men.
Hope not many are~

^^^

what do you mean american men, you mean the whoe population of men, minus the fags,

incase your wondering im not homaphobic

im NOT scared of my home.

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Male 2,510
Blowjobs and Anal sex... They assume thats all guys think about. Thats ridiculous. I think about cars and lesbians also.
^^^
me two.
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Male 1,111
I like slinky`s thinking lol

I think if women want to be independent they shouldn`t always Expect the guy to pay, they should decide between them. I`m in college I never have that kind of cash so usually it gets split or one or the other pays.

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Male 1,111
Lol sounds like you`ve got him whipped there Slain, good job on training a pussy.

There`s a big difference between being a nice guy and a pussy.
Just like there`s a big difference between having a backbone and being a jackass...I`ll let you figure out which one you got.

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Female 1,468
The dinner wasn`t that expensive. I`ve paid for bigger bills and it`s not such a big deal.
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Male 38
152US$ just so every one knows is about,
114.15 euros
77.50 pounds
176.53 Canadian dollars
189.30 Australian dollars
1 Expensive dinner
(:
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Female 648
boy... I`m glad I got the only male in the WORLD who isn`t like this I guess. *shrug* considering that we`ve been together for two years, he`s paid for TONS of things, he spends "all" (literally) of his time with me, he LOVES to tell me he loves me, we`re engaged, and we`ve *gasp* never had sex... I guess there are some men in this world who AREN`T actually losers.
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Male 85
I gotta get that book
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Female 4
Hehe, in the i love you situation it`s usually the reverse for me:D
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Male 393
All blokes think about is t*ts, ar*ses, shag*ing and beer. In that order. It`s no wonder you can`t understand us.
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Male 242
The last one was the best xD
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Male 1,217
aight, aight...
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Male 645
Mildy Amusing.
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Male 4,246
"oh now some pussy american is going to start whining that not all men are like that. no. only real men are like that. pussies pretend they love girls. come on."

So `real men` think an expensive restaurant bill is a `blow-job contract?` `Real men` will only propose to a woman who swallows?

Dumbest.
Bullshyt.
Ever.

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Male 1,354
"v_wilkes85 Also, any guy who f*cks a girl up the ass is secretly homosexual."
Any guy who accuses others of being secretly homosexual is secretly homosexual. If I like to eat snatch, does that make me secretly lesbian? If I like doggy style, does that make me into bestiality? v_wilkes85 You`re a stupid twit. You down with GGG? Yeah you know me.
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Male 1,111
I hope people aren`t taking this serious, it`s about as serious as the Zombie survival handbook on amazon.

When the girl said "I love you" and he didn`t want to say it back all he had to say was "I love me too" another typcial response lol

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Male 2,004
hmmm... i dont know if thats true, but after all i`m far away from america, but the last one couldnt have been true
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Male 870
Um...I don`t think you people should take this as a serious exposition of what the average male is thinking, American or otherwise.
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Female 44
FUNNY!!!!
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Female 673
By the way I`m more than willing to accept that guys think about sex a lot. Believe it or not, girls do, too. But there is sex and there is the conviction that women "owe" guys a blow job, or that you can lie to us so we`ll give you one, or the idea that being able to take it in the ass is what`s important in a marriage.
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Female 673
I`m glad most of the American males are all the way in America.
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Male 591
when my GF says "I love you " you know what I say?

"I love you too sweetie" then kiss her.

Its not that freakin hard.

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Male 1,289
stop giving away our secrets!!!!!
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Male 437
as id we didnt know that already
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Male 226
....its....a book? o.o;
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Male 593
Bad. I found it only mildly amusing and with the 1st two would have been enough to get the point of it.
@v_wilkes85: Finally someone who thinks the entrance is the "input" jack not the "output" jack!
@RyanF701: Good mix, I`m Spanish & Italian too!
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Female 170
And...

Apparently I needed a video to figure that out?

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Male 205
Stereotypical.
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Male 561
i want to rate it higher than 4 thats the truth
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Male 223
Ah ha...ah hahaha...Nice...
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Female 1,470
Lol
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Male 528
yea id say that about right
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Male 2,781
INTERESTING
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Female 243
"Yeah as soon as she takes it up the ass without crying" lmfao
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Male 29
Finally someone who realized that it was intended as a joke, not as a strict definition of what an average male is. Personally, I thought the punchline in #3 was pretty sweet. Nicely done.
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Male 2,372
It`s a joke, people...a JOKE. It`s not supposed to be written down for future reference or taken to be gospel.

...and as a joke, I thought it was funny enough I suppose.

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Female 1,065
Yep.. I`d say this is pretty accurate..
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Male 91
^^ I didn`t need to know that. Thanks.
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Male 50
a donkey puch is when you are "hittin it from the back", as they say, and you get to that special moment and punch her in the spine. Every muscle tightens up and it makes it that much better.
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Male 880
Sprink99,
Dunkey Punching: The penetrating partner punches the submissive partner in the back of the head or neck while having anal sex. Its intent its a strict contraction of the anal muscles.

Note: I dont condone this.

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Male 880
Vindicate:
Just because you dont like it doesnt mean others dont like it. Some girls love it, even crave it. As for the anal leakage... where are you getting your information. The exterior and interior sphincter can easily adjust to anal sex and not have any long term effects.
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Male 393
VINDICATE, What the hell is `donkey punching`?
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Male 38
1st: pretty correct
2nd: looks pretty good too,except it shouldn`t have been that sexual,but it`s true that it sucks to have to pay all the time :P
3rd:Bullpoo, saying "I love you" is something else than marriage,and I think most people respect that.Maybe not the average american,but hey who am I to judge,I`m European.
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Male 2,486
"
Note: Average AMERICAN Male. I`m mexican
"

American isn`t a race.. American is just a mix of everything from everywhere else.

I`m 50% Italian and 50% Spanish, but I consider myself American.

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Female 77
I really hope not all guys are like this..........
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Male 1,111
Amen to the girls that are willing to chip in on dinner, shows you`re not just hanging out/dating the guy for a nice (free) meal. And makes the times when he does treat you to dinner that more special.
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Male 1,111
lol I thought it was funny.
I agree with Guest on her views about it.
#3 WTF is he thinking, I don`t care how good sex is i`m not going to put myself into a marriage with someone that annoys the sh*t out of me.

Don`t say you don`t think about sex guys, it doesn`t matter how much you respect a girl or think highly of her, you`re still wondering, what she`d look like naked.
If you`re not, then you`re probably wondering what her brother would look like naked.

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Female 331
I`d definitely chip in and give him a bit of the money.

And wouldn`t like him less..

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Male 50
I never said the word LOVE. I said like.
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Female 511
Oh, and as for anal sex - if you consider anal leakage from stretching out the rectal muscles fun, go for it. Personally, I`d rather not have to wear diapers. Or have to go through hours of prep for something that really does show some latent homosexual urges. If you don`t sleep with sluts, then the vagina should be just as good, if not better, than the butt. And porn is all acting, so if that`s what you`re basing your "girls love it" on, that would also mean girls love being beaten, donkey punching, being asphyxiated... after all, they like it in porn, and porn *never* lies.

Give me a break.

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Male 737
Wow. Average americans are disgusting.
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Female 511
Eh, but then we realize that the "average American male" doesn`t actually exist. Sure, there are some guys that only want sex in return or only think about sex... but it`s usually pretty obvious who they are and fairly easy to rectify the situation. And do we really want those horndogs to represent the average male for our society? Thought not.

It was exactly what I was expecting. And not exceptionally funny. First one was amusing with seeing how they carried out the joke.

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Male 838
You know what? This actually reminds me that post that claims stupidity is taking over the world. I`m gladly not a part of it... but i do enjoy anal.
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Female 34
The first one was good and probably right on the money. The second one maybe a little true, if the guy is a real slimeball. The third one.....come on now? A little overboard in my opinion. This started off good and funny and just got so stupid by the end.
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Male 50
sorry for the rant everybody. I hate stupid people. I am not saying that I am smart, but I do my research before I start talking.
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Male 50
wilkes, now every man that does a FEMALE in the a$$ is a closet homo. You say that it is not pleasurable for a women. Do a little research before you start talking next time. The same nerves that line the vaginal wall are in the a$$ as well. You hit the opposite side of them, and some women actually like it. As far as getting your junk covered in sh.it, that won`t happen if you take the right steps before you have it. All of the porn that YOU look at probably has an anal sex scene, or two, in it. What you don`t see bore the guy rams it home is the prep that the ladies do to get ready for that scene. Plus, your logic is flawed on the price of dinner as well. If you go out to a nicer establishment, it is going to cost a hell of alot more than a frackin bowling alley. The video here is pretty much correct for the ladies in the room. It does get better the longer your with a guy, but if you just met, this is it.
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Male 219
lol @ everyone bashing on America in this

Real men aren`t afraid to admit sex is all they think about, its just your country is filled with pussies.

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Male 13
save your cash i can tell you what every man is thinking 90% of the time .
sex, food, drink, and where we will sleep tonight, where to get the cash to pay for it all, and last of all what kind of toys we have/want (ie cars, boats, house) and thats about it now any women able to tell us men what you all think about?
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Male 1,704
kinda cool.
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Female 319
I need to buy that...
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Male 1,003
oh now some pussy american is going to start whining that not all men are like that. no. only real men are like that. pussies pretend they love girls. come on. who the hell is average american anyway?all the whites in the suburbs. hah.
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Female 407
^^ Wazzup Frogg?!

Vid was kinda stupid, maybe a little true but im hoping not even close to being too accurate.

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Male 4,012
interestingly it also applies to the average homosexual male.
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Male 619
Note: Average AMERICAN Male. I`m mexican
I like to kiss and cuddle
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Male 609
haha so funny!
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Male 732
Okay, I never though I would ever say this, but... I AM OFFENDED!

I am okay with most things, but this is just sexist!

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Male 204
o how i wish i can get away with saying stuff like that
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Male 902
The pooper is fun wilkes. For all involved unless actresses are attracted to me. And the video is quite accurate, with the exceptions being pointed out by ieatbunnies. A revision with lesbians and baddass cars would be spot-on.
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Female 152
That`s why women should never say "I love you" first...never put a guy in that situation...that`s just mean.

it was semi-funny...but I hope that`s not all true...not every guy can be that shallow and selfish.

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Female 1,228
theres really nothing new in here that I didn`t know already.
If they cud come up with an analysis on the way a womens mind works, I think it might be time better spent!
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Male 133
The "I love you" situation is always one that makes things complicated, to say the least.

Poor guy. I`ve been there before, man. I feel your pain (and discomfort).

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Male 336
funny but stereotypical.
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Female 344
Ha ha, American men.
Hope not many are~
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Male 916
Primitive.
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Male 2,172
Lies... oh right... im not average.

Sorry.

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Male 1,354
$152 bucks ain`t gonna kill you. But you do deserve a week`s worth of blowing for that.
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Male 181
That about sums it up. Now if you`ll all excuse me, I have late night homework to do. And by homework i`m really thinking porno. :D
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Male 2,616
ieatbunnies... its so true...
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Male 266
HAHA
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Male 4,246
Not precisely what I was thinking, but then again I`m neither average nor American.
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Male 285
$152??

hell yeah i`d make her chip in, that`s just waaaay over the top

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Female 302
o.O;

the first one made me laugh so much cause i must admit its probably true ^^ so he will get the blow job and tell her AFTER that no he dont like her, he bang her sister too ^^

I was thinking maybe the 2 others wasnt exactly accurate... the #2 must be thinking "yeah bitch pay up, you eat so much i could feed a small country with what you eat" (thats what girls think) and #3 should be just running away... those in laws are scary... and creepy ...

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Male 880
Blowjobs and Anal sex... They assume thats all guys think about. Thats ridiculous. I think about cars and lesbians also.
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Female 395
That`s awesome...I think I should have been born a guy...
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Male 126
Link: What Guys are Really Thinking [Rate Link] - The secret of how the male brain works. Warning: adult themes. NSFW.
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