Stupid Label Warnings

Submitted by: volcombaby 10 years ago in Funny
http://luckypuppy.bravehost.com/WARNINGLABLES.html

Do not iron clothes on body.
There are 88 comments:
Female 100
lol they should add summat else for the girls that are that stupid theyd use the chainsaw as a sex toy (talk about desperate)
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Female 36
airline nuts
instructions: open package, eat nuts
lol
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Female 665
a lot of them could be that they have to put the warnings there because someone`s tried it before... wow... -.-
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Female 2
The page rocks! And all of you that don`t think so are either, so stupid that you think the page is educational, are embarrassed because you were previously injured due to not reading a warning label, or you just don`t have a sense of humor... I`ll let you decide.
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Female 2
The page rocks! And all of you that don`t think so are either, so stupid that you think the page is educational, are embarrassed because you were previously injured due to not reading a warning label, or you just don`t have a sense of humor... I`ll let you decide.
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Male 591
Sad to see that they do this because people are actually dumb enough to do these things unfortunately. Then they sue because the company should tell these people that they are morons in the first place.
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Female 35

On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
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Female 1,228
very funny.
on all packet nuts in the uk they say "may contain traces of nuts"
really?!?!
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Female 439
Ha ha, my fav was - On a Swedish Chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals."
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Male 250
The japanese ones are always the best.
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Female 137
I bet that there`s actually people who do what those labels say...well, maybe no all of them, mm specially I hope not the one of the sweden chainsaw...
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Male 62
I can vouch for the chainsaw and genitilia one.
Seriously, DON`T try it.
:-p
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Male 226
These sucked. They`d be funny if they didn`t make sense..With how easy it is to get sued now-a-days people will do all kinds of crazy poo to get money.
The comments just made the guy look stupider than whoever wrote the labels. If he would have thought about it maybe he`d know WHY they were there.
Some were quite reasonable actually.
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Male 114
"Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals."

Please, if you know anyone that has an urge that must be fulfilled to stop a chainsaw with their genatals, let them do it. for the love of god, please let them do it.

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Female 112
"Red Bull does not really give you wings."
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Female 963
On a Swedish Chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals."

ROFL :-D

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Female 606
On a child`s Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

noooooo! tell me this isnt true!

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Male 118
could of done without the lame comments for each label.
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Male 2
read the warning label on a cigarette lighter sometime
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Female 797
Whoops, I mean Fritos bag.
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Female 797
haha. I liked the Doritos one.
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Male 1,461
I`ve got a wheel barrow that says "Not for highway use" on the tire. Man I`m glad they put that on there. Saved my life.
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Male 78
"...or genitals."!? lol
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Male 49
hahaha thats funny
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Female 49
hahaha!! Love it!! that made my day!!
seriously my whole family is looking at me like I`m the freak of the year!! hahaha!!
The comments did it for me seriously :)
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Male 146
On a Swedish Chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals." lol hahahah retarded.
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Male 1,385
"Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals." Good lord
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Male 138
I heard about a microwave one that said "Not to be used to dry cat"
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Male 98
hahaha

why are translations so hard for the Japanese they seemed to get picked on for doing it the most

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Female 1,070
yay for japanese manuals? xD
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Female 878
That poor dog! These people need to be shot.
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Female 228
i dont think im going 2 sweden now...
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Male 58
funnnnnnnnnny
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Male 810
olddddd
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Female 655
On Boot`s Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
Dang. That ruins my plans
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Female 181
How dumb can people be? XD
They forgot the fruit roll up one..
Cereal: Open box and THEN eat.
Man.. this cereal tastes like friggin` cardboard!
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Male 1,496
Probably all fake, even ones at the bottom with pictures. There`s a website that let you do that.
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Female 330
Yes, even though these are absolutely stupid, they put this because there are people out there who are sue-crazy for even the simplest logical things.

Just like that lady who sued because they McDonalds put a "Caution: hot" label, and she spilled coffee on herself.

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Female 681
Lol! This makes me inspired to find more stupid labels! (Trust me theirs gotta be more of that stuff out there!!)
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Male 160
I laughed so much i... laughed a lot!
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
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Male 153
Very funny. The comments after each warning are what did it for me.
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Female 422
The one with the chainsaw originally just says hands and does not include genitals.
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Female 119
yeah...well..."funny" story. The other day I discovered the meaning of "Do not iron clothes on body" (eventhough i always made fun of it)...i was wearing a dress and i was in a rush...so the easiest way insted of taking it all off was to get the iron and iron it while wearing it (it was just one little wrinkle)....right when i was doing that i rememeber the "Do not iron clothes on body"...and realized why it was probably written. *sigh*
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Male 732
I think this comments are the funniest I`ve seen so far with this labels.
Most others are just awkward.
Oh, and writing "Might contain peanuts" on a peanaut bag IS stupid, because what else should be in there?!?
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Male 556
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."

(Sound advice..I guess.)

lmao some people are stupid though

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Male 601
Do not stop with hands or genitals.

LMFAO...

I AM LMFAO SO MUCH RIGHT NOW

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Male 4,393
o god... stupid ppl... :(
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Female 116
that was cool.
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Male 238
does that mean I could stop the chainsaw with my head and feet?
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Male 238
omgwtflol
An old lady DID microwave her pet, however the dog just died not explode. although I think that she didn`t sue anyone becuase she realized she was an idiot
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Female 670
The fritos thing was actually understandable. It means that, say, if you find an empty bag on the street, or if someone gives you their left-over bag for some reason, you can use it to win. *shrug*
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Male 239
Are these real?
"Do not try to stop chainsaw with hands or genitals"
Good thing that lable was there for me! That would of ended up ugly!
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Male 2,781
OLDER THAN THAT DANCING BANANA
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Male 1,263
LOL i`ve seen this so many times but honestly it never gets old.
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Female 83
O_o
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Male 1,364
hahaha
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Female 82
On a Swedish Chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals."

That is why after grandad turned 70 we took it away from him.....

Anyway, I think I have a solution to stupid people. Just take these warning off and let the problem sort itself out....

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Female 419
Haha seen some of them before.
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Male 379
"Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals."
ROFL!!! im gonna like die....
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Female 600
That was so amusing. the chainsaw one...wow.

I`ve seen some warnings similar to those. What`s sad is companies have to put stupid warnings like those on their products so people don`t sue them. It`s really pathetic.

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Male 139
John Smoltz of the Atlanta Braves once missed several games because of a large burn on his chest after he tried to iron his shirt while he was still wearing it.
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Female 24
haha some of those were pretty funny.
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Female 665
a lot of them could be that they have to put the warnings there because someone`s tried it before... wow... -.-
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Male 96
Of course, anyone who thinks that those are taken from actual packaging is retarded.

@gerlinde: you`re not sure because... it never happened? http://www.snopes.com/horrors/techno/mic...

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Male 62
llf i remember one time i seen a carton of milk sayin it contiens milk
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Male 187
old stuff! been seeing those on every single website since like 10 years ago im super serial
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Male 579
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
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Male 82
The Christmas light thing isn`t a warning. It`s saying can be used indoors or outdoors, as opposed to indoors only.
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Male 967
Hehe, long time since I`ve heard an AYBABTU reference. :) That`s the last time I try stopping a chainsaw with my genitalia!
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Male 988
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Male 339
I thought the bottom ones weren`t that weird. Kids sitting on dryer doors or playing inside freezers.
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Male 160
actually a guy did iron his shirt whilst still wearing it so yea it is nessesary
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Female 306
wipe genitally hahaaha
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Male 579
Not to be used for the other use.

lol, that one makes no sense. Yay for bad japanese translations!

War was beginning.
Captain: What happen ?
Mechanic: Somebody set up us the bomb.
Operator: We get signal.
Captain: What !
Operator: Main screen turn on.
Captain: It`s You !!
Cats: How are you gentlemen !!
Cats: All your base are belong to us.
Cats: You are on the way to destruction.
Captain: What you say !!
Cats: You have no chance to survive make your time.
Cats: HA HA HA HA ....
Captain: Take off every `zig` !!
Captain: You know what you doing.
Captain: Move `zig`.
Captain: For great justice.

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Male 135
some of these they made a complete fool out of themselves. e.g christmas lights are either indoor, outdoor or both, you have to specify otherwise non waterproof ones will break you f ) cking retards
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Female 7
Once there was an old woman who put her dog in the microwave, to dry it because it had rained: dog exploded.
She sued the microwave manufacturers: they failed to include any warning in their manual that it wasn`t suitable to place living beings into the microwave.
I`m not sure, but I thought she won her case.
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Male 226
On a Swedish Chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals."

(Alot of weird poo happens in Sweden.)


LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

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Male 547
Plain and simple people will sue for anything and manufacturers have to cover their azz. Plus it means some stupid person actually did that for them to put a warning lable on it in the first place. It`s all becasue of that stupid woman who burned herself on McDonalds coffee.
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Female 211
Yeah, like 1avatar said the peanut one isn`t all that stupid. Peanuts aren`t actually nuts. Some people are allergic to nuts, but not peanuts. So they have to say the peanuts were packaged somewhere where it could have been contaminated by other nuts and stuff.

Except sometimes I find that warning on the weirdest stuff. Like organic mac and cheese boxes. :/

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Female 268
they were all funny except fpr the christmas lights one.
some lights are indoor only.
the rest are quite good
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Male 459
"a lot of wierd Sh*t happens in sweeden." LMAO THATS GREAT!!!!!! ^o^
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Male 278
"product is hot after heating" xD
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Male 195
the one about the `peanuts may contain nuts` one isn`t stupid because if they didn`t it would be breaking the law.
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Male 285
bah, OOOLLLDDD, and on the `original` (well, the one i saw years ago) the comments were much funnier

still, it is a very good list :)

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Female 173
"Do not use for personal hygiene."

Oh. My. Gawd.
Bad mental image. >_<

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Female 2,074
I learned some new stuff in that page right there.
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Male 756
"Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with your hands or genitals"

Wow, guess somebody must have sued. If you`re stupid enough to try that, especially with your genitals, you probably shouldn`t be using a chainsaw.

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Female 38
Link: Stupid Label Warnings [Rate Link] - Do not iron clothes on body.
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