Broccoli Theif

Submitted by: buddy 10 years ago
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061228/ap_on_fe_st/veggie_theft

Why in the world would someone steal broccoli?
There are 55 comments:
Female 182
wat a prink
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Female 1,572
WTF?!
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Male 130
didnt he spell theive wrong?????????? just wondering correct me if im wrong
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Female 681
BROCOLLI INVASION! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!
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Male 404
My theory is that he is a kleptomaniac that saw his golden opportunity. he probably didnt even care that it was broccoli, he just wanted to steal something
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Male 59
*picks up radio* CODE RED CODE RED we have found the brocolli smuggalar, hes trying to excape GET THE TOMATOE GUNS FIRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE "wow never thought it would come to that" AHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH NOOOOO tomatoes.... my true enemy *falls*
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Male 1,386
"On the black market, I can`t imagine that`s something that`s worth money to anybody." lol black market vegetables
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Male 732
"We are looking for a broccoli thief. If you see someone who looks suspicously healthy or a vegetarian CALL THE POLICE INSTANTLY!!!"
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Male 1,217
he wont get constipated while robbing other peoples houses.
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Male 741
Ok so we have Four mayor solutions to the crime
1- Te Broccoli Bandit stole it for another one of his elaborated broccli schemes to rule the world. Batman and Robin are working hard on the batkitchen to solve this one out.
2- The Kids Next Door finally completed operation, "Not a Green Giant Anymore!" and are working on the destruction of the evil brussel sprouts, after some root beers of cours.
3- A group of drug dealers are using the trailer for the growing of their own "greens" and selling smashed up Broccoli to the stupid druggies that have zero neurons left.
4- A 21st century Robin Hood will give the stolen broccoli to the needy.
5- Some wierdo`s dream of having a broccoli pool just came true.
In any case we all know the same thing. Broccoli just made our day. well at least mine
(ideas taken from FallenSoul, VictoryRider, hagane and snapplemouse; thnx for the laughs :D XD )
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Male 138
answer to your question, buddy, Broccili Rocks.
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Male 236
omfg why would u steal that. Lol bet he didnt know what it was
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Female 2,552
`Cause it`s good. Duh.
:-P
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Male 572
"What is someone going to do with that amount of produce?"
sell it for carrots maybe
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Male 227
lmao
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Male 643
"What is someone going to do with that amount of produce?" Zorich said. "On the black market, I can`t imagine that`s something that`s worth money to anybody."

I LOL`d here.

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Male 134
AHAHAHA so funny!! I laughed as hell XD
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Male 82
id steal a truckload of broccoli. i love that sheit!!!!
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Male 923
Aramil What on Earh makes you think the guy could not drive the truck? Read my prior post, this sort of thing is not uncommon and is often linked to huge grow-ops and sometimes even organized crime. More often than not, these people are proffesionals.
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Male 1,016
Cheesey brocooli!!! !!!!mmmmm..... ....Broocoooli... ........ZCheese... ....mmmm
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Female 354
Nothing makes me more proud to live in Illinois.
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Female 1,065
The guy obviously stole the veggies so he can build a garage out of it, the individual pieces will be stuck together with cheese and piled like bricks to store the truck, DUH!
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Female 1,596
o.0 very awkward.
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Male 967
Somewhere in the world, kids are rejoicing! Sounds like the Kids Next Door finally completed operation, "Not a Green Giant Anymore!"
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Female 1,398
I read this in my newspaper two days ago.... this site is slow with news stories.
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Female 160
You know how a lot of people like to imagine swimming in a pool of money? Or pudding or whatever? He wanted a BROCCOLI pool. Dive in, the veggie`s fine!
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Female 2,695
haha. i want to do that.
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Male 1,003
I would find the fattest vegetarian or hippie who takes a shyt more often.
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Male 576
When asked if there were any leads the detective replied, "Well right now we`re just looking for the cleanest colon in town."
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Female 583
Why in the world would someone NOT steal broccoli?!
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Male 459
potatoes are kickass!!!! <@>_<@>
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Male 315
It is doubtful that the guy actually knows how to drive a truck like that. I would be willing to bet that when they eventually catch him, it will be in a seven-car pileup.
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Male 239
THEIF?
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Female 211
Well, he could probably just go to a farmers market or something and set up a broccoli stand. And everything he`d make would be profit to him.
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Male 988
well, it was worth $50, 000, but then someone says "What is someone going to do with that amount of produce? On the black market, I can`t imagine that`s something that`s worth money to anybody."

yeah, but there`s always the NORMAL market!

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Male 312
well, we know it wasn`t the hamburglar!!!!!!!!
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Male 1,461
^^There is if there`s a Broccoli Bandit.
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Female 1,972
^rofl: holy cruciferous vegetation, there`s a bat kitchen?
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Male 1,461
I think "The broccoli bandit" sounds better then just plain old "Broccoli thief".

"Oh no Batman, the broccoli bandit strikes again!"
"He sent us an encrypted message in some cheese sauce."
"Quick Robin, to the bat kitchen."

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Male 160
8| WTF!?
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Male 356
They never said WHAT kind of green stuff, now did they?
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Male 923
^^ Or since they think he stole it for the trailor, he is probably going to grow pot in the trailor then just drive it too the sale. It`s suprisingly common. If that be the case, the broccoli could probably be mulched up and composted to be used to enrich their little grow-op. Oh, and on the note of who would want broccoli, I have no clue. Unless of course he then robbed a dairy factory and made a nice cheese sauce to go over it:-p Haha, and yes nobody could turn down spuds. I love potatoes^_^
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Male 623
"What is someone going to do with that amount of produce?"

Hmm... cops aren`t looking for him... he can easily sell it. Free money for him!

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Male 888
Thieves need their greens.
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Male 126
"`We have homicides happening in town,` Zorich said. `We`re not really looking for a truck of broccoli right now.`"

$50,000 worth? You best be looking for that shiznit.

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Male 99
^Saturday, December 30, 2006 2:49:38 AM
Well duh...it prevents cancer...idiot

Nice George Carlin reference Tyrizzle...

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Female 193
I read about this in the paper @ work today
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Female 600
Ok this story had me laughing my butt off because it`s so stupid. Exactly what will the thief do with all those veggies?
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Female 694
FallenSoul, I think your comment was one in a million... especially on the topic of Stolen broccoli. Would the poor really want broccoli? Potatos on the other hand...
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Male 2,600
I used to love broccoli, until I had the misfortune of eating a nasty one and I`ve since lost the taste for them I once had.
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Male 923
Would be cool if he pulled a Robin Hood and gave it to the poor.
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Male 908
Well duh...it prevents cancer...idiot
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Female 1,972
Sounds like someone needed more fiber in their life.
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Male 880
"We`re not really looking for a truck of broccoli right now."

Apparantly, if I steal trucks of produce, the police wont come after me.

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Male 10,115
Link: Broccoli Theif [Rate Link] - Why in the world would someone steal broccoli?
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