100s of Machine Messages

Submitted by: KoalaMeatPie 11 years ago Funny
http://www.ahajokes.com/funny_answering_machine_messages.html

What did I just say?
There are 25 comments:
Female 681
??
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Female 36
Well I liked some of `em and used `em. Teehee
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Male 75
Hello? Hello? Is someone there? I can`t hear you...Because I`m not home! Leave a message.
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Male 143
The first few are pretty bad... they get a little better a few categories in.
I like this one:
Answering machine message 186
Hello, this is David. I don`t live here, so if you were trying to call me, you`ve dialed the wrong number. On the other hand, if you were trying to call John, Jim, or Eric, please leave your name and number at the tone. I don`t guarantee that one of them will call you back -- only that I won`t.
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Female 1,403
I don`t get your question. I talk like myself...whuh?
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Male 730
^that is funny. you do it in a weird voice right? otherwise people would just know its your answering machine.
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Female 1,403
I like the one that`s on my machine:
"Hi! So and So and So and so aren`t home right now but you can leave a message, ok? uhhh, lemme just get a pencil." People get sooooo confused.
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Male 73
last post!
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Female 727
meh it`s ok
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Female 1,697
read till the 7th, this last one was funnier than the rest..
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Female 1,468
I hate it when people try leave a funny message for their voicemail.
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Male 2,519
I gave up after reading the first one.
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Female 55
cra.ppy
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Male 2,567
...
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Female 1,972
That was unpleasant, but it did keep me busy for a little while.
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Male 251
I thought it was amusing. Could have been presented in a cleaner fashion, though... And I was expecting voice clips of messages, not greetings. Oh well. :)
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Male 1,586
Jesus. That blew chimps.
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Male 1,521
Stupid and boring!
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Female 674
words fail me ...
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Female 1,382
Just bad. But thisone did give me a small smile:

You`re dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world without time, where sound collides with color and shadows explode. You see a signpost up ahead -- this is no ordinary telephone answering device... You have reached, "The Twilight Phone".

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Male 58
Not funny and everyone sux
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Male 126
i read 26 of them before i realised the same thing jujubees...either im a lot stupider than u or im just a lot more patient
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Male 161
that was extremely disappointing and useless. not funny at all.
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Male 197
That was amazingly lame. I`m sorry, but that was just terrible. I read the first one and I thought "hmm, maybe these next ones will be better" but I was gravely mistaken. These are jokes my 7 year old cousin might think is funny. More so, its something maybe a 7 year old would make up. For some reason, that link just rubbed me the wrong way, sorry.
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Male 2,576
Link: 100s of Machine Messages [Rate Link] - What did I just say?
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