Trick-Or-Treaters Subject To Random Bag Searches

Submitted by: buddy 11 years ago Funny
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/41899

Announcement made by Homeland Security Department.
There are 28 comments:
Female 127
they did this in my town... wait, no they didn`t!
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Male 1,061
rite
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Male 314
Thank you very much Halifax Girl. Seriously though, I`ve been asking and no one answers, but I do check back. Hey if you wanna ROFL a little check out this link, http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/buttrocket.html
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Male 528
lol mooseyfate i agree. Now they have found a way to tax even our halloween candy. Bastards.
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Male 608
Lil Bastards need their candy taken away from them. I handed out sweet and Low packets for halloween.
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Female 2,244
[quote]On 10/31/2005 10:29:05 PM tacuvo wrote: I feel like and idiot. I`ve never been on "the onion", so at first, I thought it was real. Ridiculous, but real. Do they always write articles like these? And wtf does ROFL mean? I keep asking and no one answers me.[/quote]

People do answer you, you just don`t check back in the forums or something...ROFL means rolling on floor laughing. Doubt you`ll see this...

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Male 3,631
So who will the Homeland Security officials selectively omit in their supposed "random" searches that are unofficially guided by the mores of political correctness?? The real towlheads, taking the kids of theirs out to collect candy, disguised as icons of Western Imperialism such as Batman, Superman, and Dick Cheney, or the children of non-Muslim Americans who are merely DRESSING-UP like the Towlheads?? It will be interesting to see which party they may omit in their "random search," out of the likely confusion over which of them would be most outraged by the search which most closely fulfills the appearance-oriented logic behing counter-American suspicions. They usually omit the most plausible suspect, in other words. An indication of how successful the liberal censorship ploy of "political-correctness" has been in influencing not only the thought-processes of our daily lives, but the investigative parameters of our Executive justice system
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Female 335
thought it was real..... the way america thinks now kinda doesentmake this sound fake
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Male 96
[quote]On 10/31/2005 10:29:05 PM tacuvo wrote: I feel like and idiot. I`ve never been on "the onion", so at first, I thought it was real. Ridiculous, but real. Do they always write articles like these? [/quote]
This is really all the Onion writes. Some of it sounds slightly plausible, and some like last weeks story about Pittsburg not being prepared for zombie attacks, is just over the top.
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Male 314
I feel like and idiot. I`ve never been on "the onion", so at first, I thought it was real. Ridiculous, but real. Do they always write articles like these? And wtf does ROFL mean? I keep asking and no one answers me.
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Male 645
^^ lol
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Male 27
i like onions...my dad made me eat 1 for $5
i just hid it in my pocket(but i did take a little bite.its nasty!!)
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Male 266
you are on crack metter
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Female 352
lol, i love the onion
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Male 851
heheh
I want that job
skip all the needless walking and just take it in the name of AMERICA
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Male 1,016
UMMM IM DUMB DOES THAT MEAN I CANT GO BAG SNATCHIN??????????

soorry bout caps and im 2 lazy 2 go back and make it not caps.even though this is more writing

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Female 1,426
sure... )-|
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Female 160
I wouldnt be at all suprised if they really started doing this!
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Male 1,586
The picture of the "Most Wanted Terrorists" is the best part!
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Male 536
Fake news is funny, but not when people KNOW its fake.
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Female 683
lmao
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Female 165
Before i saw who it was written by (and read very far down) i thought it was for real!

You gotta love the onion!

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Female 7
So i take it this is just for fun.........
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Female 2,244
Meh, the onion is annoying.
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Male 992
Get those lil terrorists!
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Female 428
LoL I love the pictures.....
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Male 96
That article was funny, but the "Queer Eye Team Denounces Recent Wave Of Vigilante Homosexual Makeover Groups" was funnier this week.
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Male 10,115
Link: Trick-Or-Treaters Subject To Random Bag Searches [Rate Link] - Announcement made by Homeland Security Department.
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