Paternity Test Compilation

Submitted by: buddy 12 years ago in Funny
http://media.putfile.com/PATERNITY_TEST_JIMMYKIMMEL

You have to wait until the end for the funny part.
There are 50 comments:
Female 301
I swear nobody can keep it in their pants anymore. It`s not like condoms are expensive or hard to find. Dumbasses shouldn`t be allowed to breed.
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Male 610
my gosh u griping wench`s lighten up. hookers got what they deserved. they were unfaithful and got embarrassed... sticking up for them just cause they are loser pieces of slut trash doesnt change that lol. end bit was funny :)
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Female 415
good lord, I hope I never have to know a chic who needs a test to find out who the daddy is. Thats just sad...I mean how slutty can you be?!?
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Male 799
what the fcuk is LAMO its LMAO
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Male 737
Oh my GOD... you guys are all missing the joke. This was the funniest f*cking thing I have seen on here in a LONG time. The whole point is making fun of big gay Tom Cruise, who`s running around talking about his young cute upwardly ambitious wife and how she`s all pregnant now. The point is the joke of Tom Cruise not having actually had sex with her. Keep up now, people...
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Male 578
Well said cheesysong23.
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Female 168
It`s really sad. These people are pathetic, it`s as if they don`t think at all about their futures and have absolutely no self respect. I think before they start having sex with people they don`t hardly know they should think about the pain they`re going to cause themselves, the pain they`re going to cause they`re future child, the pain they`re going to cause us...the viewers... It`s sickening how these people are, and it`s not the girl OR the guys fault singularly, it`s BOTH of them. But then again, why would a woman DO that to herself knowing she could become pregnant and have to raise a child? A man can walk away from it and not have to deal with consequences--but then STD`s and Aids also come into play.

Conclusion:
Both sides are dumb asses.

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Male 1,420
i agee w/ JPCOO.plus theese women are som hipocritical. they say one guy is the father, and when hes not, they cry. well, it is also their fault for sleeping with someone that they didnt want to be the father of her kids. if they opne a guy to be the father, they should probly ily sleep with him.
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Male 451
wait i have double checked that was put on the funny section, BUDDY? WHY?
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Male 2,519
.... They just have to drag tom cruise in.
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Male 163
I have no idea why some of these women were very upset after theu found out. I mean sure, you are poor and have no help with the kids but that doesn`t you mean you have to act like a bitch about it. Stop lying who the father is #1. And if you are not lying and you do think that is the father well he isn`t, so what? Go find the real father and make him pay for your kids.

No reason to cry about this crap. It`s either because you`re stupid or you`re a moron, pick one.

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Male 38
AnimeCraze: All i can say is...........those guys are unresponsible pieces of poo.
If you sleep with a girl without protection, and she gets pregant, deal with it. Its your damn stupidity that got you to where you are.

<sarcasm> Sure.. its not the womans fault for letting him sleep with her without a condom.

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Female 500
Q: Baby, what did I tell you to say when you meet a nice man?

A: "Are you my daddy???"

^^^^^^so funny^^^^^^
Ha ha ha I love that movie! Yea I auctually miss Sally Jessie Raphael. They had good topics, even Jerry Springer was good before they started editing out the fight scenes, and makeing them love triangles.

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Female 44
Q: Baby, what did I tell you to say when you meet a nice man?

A: "Are you my daddy???"

^^^^^^so funny^^^^^^ :->

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Female 1,403
People! TomKat`s baby is NOT Tom`s kid. It`s Xenu`s(Scientology God) Duh, it`s like God and Virgin Mary. lmao!
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Male 979
ya tom cruise is goin nutso. scientology is so weird!
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Male 914
ya I saw the maury ones of the girl that had been on there a dozen times testing 14 diff men with no daddy how hilarious. her own fault for being a whore feel sorry for the kid though he might need some therapy when he/she grows up........then again maybe it`s fake jerry springer is lol
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Female 1,603
Kinda stupid. I expected it to be funnier.
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Female 49
tehe...
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Male 1,083
that was kinda slanted , they didnt show when the guy is actually the father . But yeah the maury show has become praternity tests all the time. BTW what ever happened to those other talk shows I kinda miss Ricki lake and rude jude they where hilarious.
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Male 58
Dang man,I`d be cryin if i wasnt Oprah`s Babie`s Daddy D=,I wouldnt Jump for joy
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Female 239
Oct 6, 7:00 PM (ET)


SYRACUSE, N.Y. (AP) - A Syracuse-area man has been accused of sending an imposter to take a court-ordered paternity test.

James Durney, 40, of Chittenango was charged Tuesday with tampering with a public record and filing a false instrument, both felonies, as well as misdemeanor criminal impersonation.

"He didn`t feel like paying child support, is what the problem was," state police Investigator Mark Nell said.

The man police said was sent to take the test instead, 34-year-old Neil Simon of Pittsfield, Mass., faces the same charges, The Post-Standard of Syracuse reported.

Police said they think Durney and Simon are relatives.

The mother of a girl born in May protested after the paternity test showed Durney was not the father. When county employees showed her a photo of the man who took the test, the woman called authorities.

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Male 1,061
meh
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Male 679
... Okay, the last bit was over my head, I think...
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Male 160
I don`t agree with your opinion in the least, AnimeCraze. It`s the women in all these situations that are sleeping around.

If my girl were cheating on me and was going to mother some other guys child I sure as hell wouldn`t stick around to play daddy.

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Male 615
that...wasnt funny on the least
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Male 517
eh? was that supposed to be funny? it was just pointless taking the pee out other peoples problems, when they obviously feel really bad about what they`ve done..........just my 2.78686784 cents
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Female 199
..that lady that threw herself into the vase/floor..i saw her on the tv the other day..it was like her 10th time testing men..i think that guy was the cab driver..*i wonder, how dumb can you get?!*
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Female 1,463
lol they shudnt lie in the first plce duh!
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Female 129
When my younger brother was in the 8th grade, there was a girl in his class who went on Maury with 7 or 8 guys...none of them were her `baby daddy`. Pathetic, I tell you. They just keep getting younger.
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Female 26
ummm ya ok then

pretty boring if u ask me
;)

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Female 104
[quote]On 10/7/2005 11:45:58 AM Twist13 wrote: Q: Baby, what did I tell you to say when you meet a nice man? A: "Are you my daddy???"[/quote]

LAMO!!

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Male 1,030
I once saw an episode of Maury where this whore had already checked 14 guys and hadn`t found the father. She had to be having sex constantly to go thru 14 guys and not find the fater. And Tom Cruise has lost his mind.. what an idiot.
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Male 608
Q: Baby, what did I tell you to say when you meet a nice man?

A: "Are you my daddy???"

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Male 169
tom cruise is a jackass. dane cook did a HILARIOUS parady of the oprah show in jimmy kimmel at www.danecook.com. go to videos and top and click on jimmy kimme live 5/27/2005 on the left. dane cook is the man!
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Female 21
yeah, i heard that too wild. i`m no expert on child birth myself but to me that sounds like hell. no pain killers OR noise. what the hell kind of a religion is that? Good luck to Katie if she does give birth that way.
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Female 683
omg. that is hilarious.
kate isnt alowwed to take any pain killers during the birth or make ANY noise because of their religion. the person who make these rules was obiously an man
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Male 36
"If you sleep with a girl without protection, and she gets pregant, deal with it. Its your damn stupidity that got you to where you are."

but...all the men in question werent, AnimeCraze. WHat is to be said about the money-grubbing whores who stick kids on a guy who isnt the father? They even made a catchy new song about it.

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Female 160
The funniest part of this whole thing is the deal with the "poo". Anyways, interesting video.:-D
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Male 159
i feel bad for all these young sluts...
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Female 128
poo...LOL
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Female 23
lol that was erm...tom cruise...he is goin 2 be a daddy soon...haha or is he!!!
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Female 85
hm........they changed the word S|-|!T to `poo` in my post........

aw man

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Female 85
All i can say is...........those guys are unresponsible pieces of poo.

If you sleep with a girl without protection, and she gets pregant, deal with it. Its your damn stupidity that got you to where you are.

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Female 211
"lmao did u see the woman fling herself into the vase of flowers"

haha that was so fu(kin funny!like seriously!

i hate tom and katie i couldnt give a sh/it!

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Female 363
lmao did u see the woman fling herself into the vase of flowers
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Male 160
Heh, I hate those. It seems just about every Maury Povich show its all about paternity tests.
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Female 412
and i`m glad they will never be fathers.
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Male 992
My baby daddy
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Male 10,115
Link: Paternity Test Compilation [Rate Link] - You have to wait until the end for the funny part.

:-D

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