Courtroom Bloopers

Submitted by: buddy 13 years ago in Funny
Some of the stupidest things ever said in court
There are 23 comments:
Female 464
Hilarious!
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Female 790
Heehee. Funny stuff!
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Female 26
lmao!
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Female 252
and these are REAL? Interesting!
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Male 76
goody good stuff
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Female 118
That was funny, I liked the last one.
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Male 384
my favorite is the one that princessXTC wrote out
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Male 1,407
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?

A: By death.

Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

This one actually is perfectly understandable. The death of a third person could have caused tension in the marriage or something.

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Female 211
The voodoo one was the most hilarious, mostly because it is so funny and something I wouldn`t expect to happen in real life.
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Female 493
Q: Now doctor, isn`t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn`t know about it until the next morning?

A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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Female 255
I guess I`ll pick my favorite too:

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

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Female 2,035
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Lol! Thats my favorite.

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Female 13
lol, those were so funny!
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Female 344
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?

A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

:-P

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Female 808
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?

A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can`t remember which.

Q: How long has he lived with you?

A: Forty-five years.

:-D

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Female 346
^ I understand that the lawyers aren`t allowed to just "assume" things, so some of the things they say are necessary, but it`s still funny what they have to say to avoid leading the witness. Example:

Q: Can you describe the individual?

A: He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q: Was this a male, or a female? (haha giggle snicker)

The most logical (and less funny) response that a normal person might have made would be, "So he was male?", but that could be considered leading the witness.

But it`s still funny!

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Female 339
that was funny in a sad way.
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Male 2,620
Q: She had three children, right?

A: Yes. Q: How many were boys?

A: None.

Q: Were there any girls?

This seems stupid, but it`s actually necessary because lawyers aren`t allowed to lead the witness.

But most of them were just plain stupid:-P.

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Female 1,004
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?

A: We both do.

Q: Voodoo?

A: We do.

Q: You do?

A: Yes, voodoo.


ow, my brains....

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Female 259
i fink all those r funny......altho da last 1 isnt da best...
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Male 253
i like this one

Q: What is your date of birth?

A: July 15th.

Q: What year?

A: Every year.

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Male 129
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?

A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

Q: And why did that upset you?

A: My name is Susan.

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Male 10,115
Link: Courtroom Bloopers [Rate Link] - Some of the stupidest things ever said in court

:-)

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