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Category: Funny
Date: 12/22/03 09:41 AM

18 Responses to 101 Ways To Pass The Time When You Have A Cold

  1. Profile photo of dreammyme
    dreammyme Female 70 & Over
    164 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 9:41 am
    Link: 101 Ways To Pass The Time When You Have A Cold - That whole ``praying for death`` thing is implied.

    25. Discover that, by inhaling rapidly through your nose, you can imitate the sound of an engine revving. Lean over the cats and rev your sinuses repeatedly until they wake up from their naps, get annoyed, and slink off.

  2. Profile photo of f0rk0
    f0rk0 Female 18-29
    482 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 10:01 am
    "32. Think about how you did get the cold. Think about all the random, anonymous, possibly-germ-laden surfaces you have touched in the last few days. Think about how the virus probably sat quietly on a table at a coffee shop or on a door handle, waiting for its chance, and lodged its tiny self deep in one of your fingerprints, knowing that you would eventually rub your face and that from anywhere on your face it`s just a short whistling-Dixie stroll to your mucus membranes."

    -----this one sounds like something i`d be thinking about

    :-D

  3. Profile photo of temptress247
    temptress247 Female 18-29
    7 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 10:06 am
    this is great!
  4. Profile photo of xXGC_ChickXx
    xXGC_ChickXx Female 13-17
    808 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 10:37 am
    haha...i love this
  5. Profile photo of citygirlkris
    citygirlkris Female 18-29
    223 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 11:36 am
    cute :-D
  6. Profile photo of EmilyJ
    EmilyJ Female 13-17
    62 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 12:21 pm
    -lol- thats great!
  7. Profile photo of Kathryn137
    Kathryn137 Female 13-17
    382 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 12:40 pm
    5. Run out of Kleenex late at night. Use toilet paper instead until you start to worry about running out of toilet paper; switch to paper towels.

    6. Run out of paper towels; switch to notebook paper.

    7. Run out of notebook paper; switch to Post-It notes.

    8. Run out of Post-Its; switch to sleeves.

    9. Run out of shirts; switch to lampshades

  8. Profile photo of Kathryn137
    Kathryn137 Female 13-17
    382 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 12:42 pm
    36. Spend several minutes trying to replicate the amusing "huuhhh-OOOONNNK" noise you just generated somehow while blowing your nose.

    37. "Faaahhhhhhhnk." No, not quite...

    38. "Bbbbllllllssshhh." Dammit.

    hehehehehehe!!!!!! :-D
    I like! :-D

  9. Profile photo of ichabod00x
    ichabod00x Male 18-29
    183 posts
    December 22, 2003 at 9:00 pm
    the part about the Velamint rant was awesome
  10. Profile photo of freakyppl
    freakyppl Female 18-29
    395 posts
    April 3, 2004 at 1:42 pm
    ah i`ve got tears coming out of my eyes from laughing so hard absoulutley wonderful kudos to whoever showed me this site...hey thats me...yay i get a kudos! when sick i have actually done some of what they said...repeatedly.
  11. Profile photo of freakyppl
    freakyppl Female 18-29
    395 posts
    April 3, 2004 at 1:44 pm
    how come it says only one star i gave it a WOW rating *is confused* ::bitches at all the other ppl who say i`m so fuc*king stupid to...whatever:: meow...meow...meow....MOOOOOOOOOOOOO....meow...meow...meow...meow...uhh.. yea
  12. Profile photo of eastsiderepp
    eastsiderepp Male 18-29
    2620 posts
    April 18, 2004 at 8:09 pm
    64. Go to bed.

    65. Feel hot. Throw the sheets off.

    66. Feel very very cold. Huddle under the sheets.

    67. Wake up bathed in sweat. Throw the sheets off again. Go back to sleep.

    68. Wake up with chattering teeth. Huddle under the sheets again. Go back to sleep.

    69. Repeat 65-68 fifty-five times or until your alarm goes off.

    So tru, so tru

  13. Profile photo of Cheese King
    Cheese King Male 18-29
    1031 posts
    April 18, 2004 at 8:55 pm
    33. Struggle not to give in to the Howard-Hughesian "germs…EVERYWHERE!" panic attack you can feel coming on.
  14. Profile photo of go_sullivan
    go_sullivan Female 13-17
    91 posts
    April 18, 2004 at 11:49 pm
    yay, now i have something to do because i have a cold now
  15. Profile photo of roteg
    roteg Female 18-29
    19 posts
    April 19, 2004 at 12:04 am
    56. Find a plastic drinking straw in the back of your silverware drawer. Using the straw, a roll of packing tape, and thumbtacks, fashion a nostril-sized attachment for the vacuum cleaner. Plug in the Hoover and insert the rig into your right nostril. Prepare to turn on the Hoover. With your finger hovering over the power button, consider that, although you have had the occasional stroke of genius in your life, this might not qualify as one of them. Cringe as you picture your mom at your funeral, forced to explain between sobs that everything in your skull got sucked into the vacuum bag and the side of your head collapsed inwards like a broken volleyball. Remove the straw from your nostril, take the rig apart, and put the Hoover away.


    I loved this one...*still laughing*

  16. Profile photo of RockGirl
    RockGirl Female 18-29
    70 posts
    April 19, 2004 at 1:18 pm
    In the service of finding a silver lining in the situation, vow to perfect your loog-hocking technique once and for all.
  17. Profile photo of sad182
    sad182 Female 13-17
    380 posts
    May 15, 2004 at 10:12 pm
    cool
  18. Profile photo of myrandommind
    myrandommind Female 13-17
    178 posts
    February 16, 2007 at 7:16 pm
    I literally have tears coming out of my eyes. My dad is wondering why I`m giggling so much.......

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